Always by my side

By Silver Dolphin

Characters belong to Square, don't sue!

Boredom. Squall stretched his legs out ahead of him and tucked his hands behind his head, wincing as his back popped in several places. He would have taken a walk to remove the stiffness from his body, but the train was just so darned…familiar. Boring. Just the thought of walking down the same old passageways was enough to dismiss whatever inclinations he had had to relieve the ache in his muscles.

The sounds his back made echoed in the silent cabin, and Quistis looked up from where she was curled up on the seat, reading her astrology book. Her cerulean eyes sparkled with undisguised amusement as she shot him a sidelong glance. "Need my help?"

Squall did not reply, but a hint of a sulk played around the corners of his austere mouth.

"What's the matter?" Quistis asked as she stood and stretched. Her sleeveless blue top rode up as she did so, exposing her delicate midriff. Her taste in clothes had changed in the four years following Ultemicia's defeat – no longer did she dress so severely, but had opted instead for a sleeveless blue blouse ending just above her waist, white Capri pants hugging her legs down to mid-calf. Although she had discarded the gloves, the utility belt had stayed, slung low over her hips, and her formidable Save the Queen rested in her duffel bag somewhere.

The hairstyle was the same, as was her behavior towards him. Age had not changed her personality at all.

"Bored stiff." He ground out, shifting his shoulders uncomfortably.

"Literally," Quistis agreed, motioning for him to remove his shirt. He complied – he knew what was coming next, and he was even grateful for it. A nice massage from time to time worked wonders for his often-sullen mood.

Squall stretched out on the entire length of the seat, lying on his stomach with his head in his arms. Quistis's hands moved sensually across his back and shoulders, gently kneading, pressuring, and coaxing his strung-up tendons to unwind. She pressed her fingers carefully along his spine, and he felt the rest of the tension slowly seep out of his body, as his muscles quivered and relaxed.

"You're getting spoiled, Leonhart." She said lightly, fingers resting on the nape of his neck. "What would the mighty commander be if his aide wasn't there to rub his back now and then?" She smoothed his hair back from his face. It seemed a sin, that a man should have such silky smooth hair and beautifully sculpted features.

Come now, Quistis, it was just a silly crush. You're way over him. Supposedly. That was the politically correct thought that ran through her mind, but her feelings did not agree with it. So what if she still loved him? She'd been waiting since she was seventeen. A few more years wouldn't hurt.

They say if you love something, let it go. If it comes back to you, it's yours for keeps. Yeah, right. She had stayed in the sidelines for four years now, and still he roamed free. Yet this not so secret yearning wasn't all that bad, actually…probably the reason why she hadn't worked herself into a raving loon yet.

"There are few privileges to being SeeD commander, and having a personal masseuse is one of them," Squall replied, as he sat up and retrieved his shirt. "Thanks."

"Welcome." She scooted over to pick up her book again, but instead of focusing on the tiny, blurry words she peeked over the top of the book at Squall.

He sat staring at the wall, still as a marble statue. Hyne, she probably could have dropped a bomb in front of his face, and he wouldn't have noticed.

Her lips quirked slightly, and she discarded the book altogether. "Squall?"

No response.

"Squall!" she snapped her fingers in front of his comely face. He blinked once, twice, and leveled his blue-gray gaze on her.

"What?"

"Uh…how long till we reach Galbadia?"

"Two more hours or so."

His face was so stoic. No emotion registered at all. She shifted till she was sitting next to him, then reached out a finger and poked his temple gingerly. "Something up there you'll like to share?"

"No."

"Tell me anyway. You're bored, so you might as well entertain me."

He shot her a smoldering scowl. "Leave. Me. Alone."

She considered a moment. "No."

He muttered what sounded like a very unflattering comment under his breath, but she chose to ignore it. "Rinoa wouldn't have wanted you to be like this, you know."

His eyes sharpened and ignited with silvery fire. "What would you - "

"That's why you're so detached, isn't it? You don't want to get close to anyone else and have them leave you like she did." Quistis put her fingers on his arm. "She killed herself when she realized she was turning into Ultemicia because she didn't want to hurt her loved ones. Especially you."

"I could have helped her."

"Oh?" She arched her eyebrow.

"Somehow." Squall closed his eyes and leaned his head back on the seat, the very image of indifference.

"If you get another backache I'm not going to massage it away this time," Quistis warned, slipping her hand round the back of his neck to bring his head up. "Don't you believe in second chances?"

"No. Love is materialistic. Once the one you love is gone you're on your own again. What good is it when you wind up in the same position eventually?"

Without waiting for her answer Squall stood up and headed out the cabin.

Quistis sat, eyes fixed on the hand that had touched his neck. "But Squall…" her voice was barely more than a whisper. "That isn't always the case, you know."

- End Chapter 1 -