A/N: Hey! This was just a bit of randomness that was inspired by one of the exceedingly long and sometimes annoying surveys that hersheygal gives me. So blame her. :D This is pretty much a little crossover between two of my favorite shows LOST and HOUSE. I'll probably have hersheygal help me out with some of the fine details for the HOUSE bit since she knows it WAY better than I do. And, just so you know, THERE IS NO WAY IN HELL THIS IS SUPPOSED TO BE SERIOUS!!! Sorry, I just don't want any flamers. :D Review and let me know what you think!
Disclaimer: I don't own a hit T.V. show but I rent. (Kudos if you got the little reference in that)
The small group of islanders lounged about on the sandy beach and chatted with one another cheerfully. Life seemed to finally be settling down ever so slightly. Jack was back (although with an Other in tow but he could be forgiven for that) as was Kate and Sayid. Locke was mysteriously missing but none of the adventurers could give a straight answer as to why he didn't return.
Most people just blew it off as Jack, Kate, and Sayid just not feeling like sharing top-secret information with them. What else is new?
Some, like Charlie and Hurly, tried to trick one of them into talking but unfortunately that plan wasn't really going anywhere. It didn't matter how many times they tried to casually slip it into conversation. The person they were interrogating simply laughed and walked away.
Although Kate did almost slap Charlie that one time for pestering her right after asking how she and Jack were doing. Some women were so touchy.
All in all though, life was getting back to normal. About as normal anyway as life on a freakish, demented island could get.
Then they all saw the airplane.
………………………………………………………
"Oh my god!" Claire screamed as she protectively wrapped her arms around Aaron. She stared up into the sky and continued to shout in alarm. Charlie raced out of their tent where he had been strumming out a song to see what the bloody hell was going on.
"What the bloody hell is going on?" he demanded. I'm telling you… one-track mind…
"There's an airplane!" Claire shrieked and instantly got the attention of everyone around her.
Wow… you would think her screaming bloody murder would have been enough but apparently the islanders were only interested in what could help them.
"Jesus Faye Wray, where the hell is King Kong?" Sawyer snapped as he approached the screaming girl. Oh yeah… his time of no nicknames was officially over twelve hours ago and Sawyer was laying them on really heavy.
"Did anyone ever tell you, Sawyer, that you are such a nerd?" Kate asked as she also jogged up to Claire's side and squinted up at the sun. Within minutes Jack and Juliet were also at the scene which Kate carefully avoided noticing.
"We might want to move," Jack warned as he also looked up at the bright blue sky. Everyone else glanced at him and in unison asked,
"Why?" Jack sighed and glared at all of them as if they should all already know.
"Because it's going to crash and you don't want it to land on you," Jack snapped and instantly everyone understood. And they ran around the camp like chickens with their heads cut off. That is except for Desmond, of course. He already knew where the plane was going to crash and safely escorted Charlie away from the disaster area.
"How did they live without me?" Jack wondered as he stared up at the heavens. "How? And why me?" he groaned and then raced around like the rest of them. He ignored the fact that Sawyer and Kate were holding hands so as not to lose each other.
The drone of the plane grew stronger and the screaming metal contraption hurtled towards the island. The shouts of people on board could be distinctly heard despite the immense distance and then suddenly…
It crashed with a heavy THUD and a BOOM into the previously peaceful sand.
People on the island screamed.
People on the airplane screamed.
And screamed.
And cried a little too.
So the noise was pretty overwhelming.
Then, through the dust and the smoke being emitted from the fallen airplane out came a mysterious figure. His silhouette was hunched over from the use of a cane but it walked with great amount of dignity.
The survivors squinted to get a better look and wondered who this mysterious new comer could be.
Then out emerged an older man with graying hair and beard who leaned heavily on a wooden cane. His cynical eyes surveyed the situation and he stared at all the people who were screaming and horribly injured. And then he said one solitary thing.
"Could we all just shut UP for a minute?!"
………………………………………………………..
Several hours later, the mess was all cleaned up and several more people from the new flight were huddled amongst the survivors. Many did not survive the crash but some managed to come out a live.
One was the same older man who we met earlier in the chapter.
Another was a middle aged attractive woman with dark hair who continued to glare at the older man. Most of the original survivors guessed that the older man must really be an ass.
Not to mention the tall and kind looking dark haired man who appeared to just want everyone to get along super duper. The others all felt bad for him because it seemed that his mission was failing horribly.
What was weird was that all these people seemed to know each other.
Jack had them settled in the center of a large ring made out of the original survivors and was glaring at them all rather harshly.
"Who are you?" he barked commandingly and allowed his eyes to shift over each individual. The young woman spoke up first in her even, calm tone.
"My name is Dr. Cuddy. These here are Wilson," she announced and pointed to the younger kind man, "And House." On the last name she pointed to the older man and scowled deeply as if the name brought her much pain.
"Can't they speak for themselves?" Jack spat and glared at the two men suspiciously. Cuddy looked offended but Wilson quickly interjected before a major spat occurred within their new friends.
"Yes, we can," he assured and quickly introduced himself. "I'm Wilson and I work with both Dr. Cuddy and Dr. House." Wilson then turned to look at House and gave a pointed look towards Jack and the others. House raised his eyebrows questioningly and looked almost surprised that Wilson should suggest that he introduce himself. He consented though and turned to look at Jack mockingly.
"While we're all 'traveling round the circle' so that we know each other better after the most horrendous crash in our lives," House began with a serious expression, "I'm Dr. House and these are my associates. Do I get a pencil as a prize now or something?" Jack scowled at House's behavior.
"HEY!" he shouted and advanced towards House with a dangerous expression. "You're lucky that we're keeping you alive now wise guy! Why should we trust you? You could be one of them! You could be the smoke monster that no one knows anything about! You could be a polar bear in disguise! You could really be one of our fathers that we hate!" Jack accused and jabbed his finger at House angrily while his cheeks flushed and his eyes nearly popped out of their sockets.
"Did you notice that your eyes are really, really wide and scary right now? I mean, they're rolling all over the place!" House pointed out and pulled his head away a little bit. Jack opened his mouth as if keep shouting before someone interrupted.
"Jack!" Kate cried from the outer part of the circle. "Come on, that's enough!"
At the same time, Wilson was quietly trying to coach his friend from doing something stupid.
It was too late though. Jack's expression was all wild-eyed and crazy and there was no stopping him now. However, House beat him to the punch.
"It looks like somebody took a few womanly pills today," House muttered while staring directly at Jack. Jack gaped at the newcomer and simply stared for the longest time… wondering how the hell he should respond to that.
Unfortunately he came up with nothing. He simply glared at House dangerously and then stalked away with his eyes still shifting insanely.
House turned his attention back to the only one that seemed to make any sense so far that he had spoken to. That person was the attractive brunette in the back.
"Well what crawled up his ass and died?" House asked with raised eyebrows. Kate smiled and moved over so she could talk more freely with him.
"I think he feels threatened. He's not the only doctor on the island anymore," Kate explained as Sawyer moved up next to her possessively. New men meant new obstacles for him.
"Ah," House said knowingly and leaned back thoughtfully. "Spinal surgeon?" Everyone's expressions were bewildered (at least, those who knew Jack) and their eyes were questioning.
"How did you know?" Kate asked breathily as she was a little caught off guard. House shrugged and smiled cockily.
"Well they're usually the whiniest of all the surgeons and cry the most when they lose a patient," House explained. "He looked like a crier to me." Everyone was silent and House took the opportunity to add on to his statement. "Not to mention he seems like he couldn't give CPR worth a damn."
"I can agree with that!" Charlie interjected, rubbing his chest tenderly where Jack had practically beat him to death all those weeks ago. Sure it had saved his life… it hurt like the dickens though.
"If you don't mind," Cuddy interrupted, her eyebrows raised coolly and her hawk like gaze surveyed those around here. "I wouldn't mind having some questions answered." Wilson smiled approvingly at her and Cuddy gave a small smile back. House however gave a little half turn in her direction and pouted almost mockingly.
"Come on, I was on a roll!" he protested. Cuddy pointedly ignored him.
"How long have you all been here?" she asked and Hurley quickly responded.
"About 80 or 90 days." Cuddy raised her eyebrows in surprise and looked around at the camp.
"It seems like you're well adjusted to life here," Wilson added and also took in all the tents and food stations. The original survivors smiled at each other and nodded.
"I guess we are," Charlie echoed and there came murmurs of agreement. House narrowed his eyes at Claire though and pointed at her.
"How do you have such a nice haircut?" he asked in bewilderment. "And how did you deliver that baby?" Cuddy slapped his pointing finger back down and smiled apologetically at Claire.
"I'm sorry sweetie… just ignore him," she apologized. Claire just smiled and hugged Aaron a little closer to her. House frowned but stayed mostly silent as Cuddy asked the next question.
"How long have you been living here?" she asked suspiciously and glanced at all the smelly and somewhat dirty people around her.
"Well sweet thang," Sawyer drawled and everyone turned to look at him in surprise. "We set up some tents, scavenged whatever we could from the plane, explored a little and then we found…" Suddenly Sawyer paused and cast a nervous glance around the group. The three doctors were not amused however.
"And you found what?" Cuddy snapped in irritation. The rest were silent as they debated on whether they should recount all the happenings on the island. Kate finally spoke up for the group and smiled apologetically.
"We probably shouldn't talk about that quite yet. It would take a long time and you all are probably… exhausted," she stuttered. Hurley quickly came to her rescue by changing the subject quickly towards the new survivors.
"So where were you all headed?" he asked curiously and Wilson answered.
"We were making our way to Australia from a California port," Wilson explained and was about to go into more detail before Sawyer cut him off rudely.
"You were going from CALIFORNIA to AUSTRALIA?" he barked and the rest of the camp tensed noticeably. Wilson's eyebrows raised up and he looked a little afraid of Sawyer's defensive attitude but he nodded slowly.
"Yeah, that's right," Cuddy assured and House squinted his eyes at the band of people before him. Something was definitely suspicious and none of them liked it.
"We were going from Australia TO California," Sayid stated and clenched a fist nervously. House however started when he heard the heavy accent of Sayid and smirked ever so slightly.
"Oh look! You've got an Iraqi!" he exclaimed and smiled over at Sawyer. "I bet that comes in handy!" No one seemed to hear House's racial joke however for the mysterious and creepy soundtrack was mounting in the background and the camera panned in to Dr. Wilson's face.
"Guys," Wilson began in a slow and fearful voice, "Where are we?"
(BLACKOUT!)
A/N: So yeah… it's taken me a while to write this and a lot has changed on LOST since I started. It's all so complicated though that I just want to leave it like this for now. Lol!! Anyway, please let me know what you thought!
I also left out some characters from HOUSE because… well… I just didn't want to deal with SIX doctors adjusting to life on the island. I think three is more than enough. At least, I hope so.