Disclaimer: I do not own Full Metal Alchemist. If I did… let's just say there'd be just a tad more brotherly love… Smirks

Jessie: So this was just kind of a random thought that passed through my mind one day, as I was sitting in the car, very bored.

Joh: Yeah?

Jessie: Nods I just… elaborated on it… And I kind of surprised myself while writing this; I didn't know I could be this cruel to poor Alphonse.

Joh: Angst, much?

Jessie: Yeaaah. It kind of took me forever to get back into the swing of writing, and so I apologize for the long wait.

Warnings: Major angst, one-sided Elricest, mind-torture, cruelty in general (Envy is not know for being nice), lemon.

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Everyone has their own dirty little secrets…

But Edward Elric happened to believe that he could keep his from his younger brother, Alphonse.

It's incredible, just how very much mistaken even a State Alchemist can be.

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Too many times, Al had caught his older brother with his secret; too many painful, silent times to count.

What's more, Edward still hadn't realized that Al had found out just who it was he met with regularly… regularly meaning every night. However, there were those few nights where the blonde couldn't help himself, and moaned a little too loudly or accidentally let out a loud gasp he supposedly thought was suppressed enough.

But Al had woken-- the very first time, and each time after that.

At first, the boy had been in denial, and simply couldn't bring himself to believe what he was seeing. It just wasn't possible; his brother couldn't be sleeping with Envy.

Alphonse knew that had to be imagining things.

However, re-occurring dreams like these aren't so easy to put out of your head…

So the younger Elric lay awake one night-- and, after he'd heard the unmistakable sound of the window being opened, had gotten up to investigate and watched, mortified as the easily recognizable homunculus slipped in through the window and was immediately brought into Edward's embrace.

Maybe he wouldn't have minded quite so much if Edward has so much as mentioned it. Maybe it wouldn't have hurt so much if Edward had told him.

But he doubted it-- it probably would've hurt just the same, as he'd been hiding a deep-rooted crush on his brother ever since (and most likely, even before) Edward had restored his body.

That first night he'd discovered for himself how very real his "dream" had been, Al had remained awake and ended up crying himself to sleep… and the night after that, and the night after that.

But he never told his brother he knew… and Edward never told Al.

So the brunette just faked a smile, faked a laugh, and faked his happiness each and every day; to the extent that no one could pierce that mask of his.

What probably hurt the worst, however, was that his brother –whom he was still so close to– couldn't recognize his suffering.

But Edward was away tonight-- on a mission of very short notice. In fact, they'd only heard about it an hour ago. So Edward had time only to pack his suitcase and hug his brother (Al had hid his blush) before he was out the door.

Neither Roy nor Alphonse missed the blonde's hesitance to leave. When Edward had paused as the door to sneak a quickly glance between his brother and the window, Roy had asked if anything was wrong. Ed had merely flashed Al one of his signature grin and shook his head toward his superior officer before they had left…

Leaving a certain kitten-obsessed alchemist behind with, in the way he saw it, the opportunity of a lifetime; a plan having already begun to formulate in his mind the minute Ed had closed the door behind him. Although Al wasn't quite as skilled as his brother was in alchemy, it didn't mean he wasn't just as informed on the Homunculi, or as observant.

He knew the Homunculi had certain abilities.

He knew what Envy could do.

And so there he was, waiting for the Sin to appear… but in Edward's bed.

He heard a nearly inaudible thump by his bedside --if it hadn't been utterly silent, he knew he would have missed it-- and quickly sat up.

Surprised (yet undoubtedly intrigued) violet eyes met cool, amber ones.

"…Well, well, if it isn't the youngest Brothers Elric," Envy chuckled, raising an eyebrow and stepping back; a hand on his hip.

"Hello, Envy."

"Ne… where's O 'chibi-san?"

"He got pulled away on a mission," Al replied with a slight shrug of one shoulder.

"Ah… I see. Now, what I'd really like to know is… just how long have you known about us?"

"Nearly a year," Al said, trying his very best to keep his voice steady.

"And what do you intend to do now?" Envy asked evenly, gazing unblinkingly at the brunette. Al's eyes fell to his lap, and he fell silent; it was only after a painfully long pause that he replied.

"…I wanted to ask you for a favor," Alphonse said quietly at last, finally letting his eyes raise to Envy's face before darting away.

Obviously, Envy wasn't expecting this, as both eyebrows arched in surprise.

"Do you, now? Well, I must say; I haven't the slightest idea of what you might want from me," Envy remarked, gesturing helplessly. Suddenly the Sin's hand was cupping Al's chin, forcing him to look up into his face.

"What am I going to do with you? Well, for one thing, I'm can't hurt you… No, Edo wouldn't like that; so that won't do," Envy said thoughtfully, cocking his head to the side in concentration. Finally, a strange smile lit up the Homunculus' face.

"I must admit, alchemist, you've really caught my interest. What can I do for you?"

Al could have sworn his heart skipped a beat; could Envy possibly be serious? Could he… would he actually hear him out?

He gulped; this was it, this was his only chance; his only chance with Edward.

"First of all, swear to me that you won't tell Edward," Al demanded firmly; sounding much more confident than he actually felt. Envy whistled softly.

"What's this-- the inseparable Elric Brothers are keeping secrets from each other, now?" Envy cackled, his grin only broadening as he watched Al flinch as though he'd been struck.

"Alright; this meeting will be our little secret," Envy consented. Al glanced up at Envy warily.

"How can I trust that you won't tell him?" Al began slowly.

"Alphonse, if there's one thing you can trust me to do, it's for me to keep my word," Envy replied, his expression turning to one of seriousness. Al hesitated before nodding.

"Okay…"

"Get on with it, will you? What could possibly be so terrible that you'd take such precautions in making sure your own brother would never find out?" Envy asked, sounding mildly impatient at this point. Al closed his eyes, and took a long, deep breath before blurting it out--

"I want you to become Edward for me."

"What?" Envy's eyebrows arched in surprise yet again, his expression matching the tone of confusion in his voice.

"But why on Earth would you need me to look like Edward-- you're with him all the time," Envy interjected. It only took the tell-tale blush that rose to Alphonse's cheeks for Envy to fully comprehend the situation.

"I see; little Alphonse Elric has a crush on his older brother-- so that's the way things are, then?" Envy chuckled, shaking his head incredulously.

"And so you've been building up the nerve to go to your brother's lover in order to get what you want, is that it?" Envy asked coolly.

"Stop it, Envy, please; you wouldn't… you couldn't understand how much it hurts… how much I need him," Alphonse begged, tears pricking his eyes as he desperately tried not to let them fall.

"It's incredible… the lengths humans will go to for their own happiness…" Envy mumbled wondrously.

"I'll never ask anything of you again; it's just that… you… you're the only one who can do this…"

A sudden flash of light caused the young boy's eyes to close against its brightness; the air was suddenly thick with the metallic taste of alchemy-- and a startled Alphonse found himself gazing up into the familiar, golden eyes of the brother he adored.

"Whaddya want, Al? What can I do for ya, hmm?" Ed's look-alike purred, his molten gold eyes closing halfway. Something in Al's chest lurched painfully, and his eyes fell to the floor. What was he doing? How could he possibly… what about Edward?

"Niia-- E-Ed-I mean… Envy, wait—" Al stuttered nervously, before his words were cut off by a pair of soft lips pressed firmly against his own. He gasped and initially tried to pull away; however the feel of metal fingers gently touching his elbow made him freeze.

Envy chuckled lowly, before pressing his body up against Al's. The combined weight of Envy's full weight and his own was too much for Al's arms to continue to hold up, and he fell backward; leaving Al sprawled beneath the blonde alchemist's smaller body.

"Envy, wait, I-"

"But isn't this what you wanted, Al?" Envy asked huskily, a smug smirk playing on his lips. Al blinked quickly, but wasn't able to stop the tears from trickling down his cheeks.

"What's wrong, little brother? I just want to make you happy… I thought you loved me," Envy said, a hurt expression overtaking his lustful one.

Those few words were all the incentive needed. With his self-restraint crumbling away, along with his remaining doubts and hesitation, Al launched himself into the blonde's arms; pulling him into a desperate, frenzied kiss. When he broke away for air, his was face was flushed a light pink, and he was panting heavily.

"Eager, are we?" The elder alchemist teased, smirking slightly as he ran his fingers through Al's silky locks. The younger alchemist ignored him, clumsily unbraiding his brother's golden hair so that it splayed about his shoulders.

Al gasped as Envy unexpectedly turned over so that he was now the one pinned to the bed. He flushed again-- a flicker of fear in his eyes as he noticed Envy's lust darkened eyes for the first time just before the Sin leaned down for another, more demanding kiss.

Al hesitated as a warm tongue pressed against his lips before timidly allowing Envy's tongue to explore the moist cavern. His wide, honey eyes gradually fluttered closed and he found his arms slipping around Envy's neck to pull him closer; breathing in his brother's comforting scent.

The brunette gave a tremendous start when he felt a cool hand slip beneath his shirt. Envy broke their kiss to gaze at the panting brunette questioningly.

"Hmm… you've never done anything like this before, have you?" Envy murmured inquisitively, tilting his head thoughtfully. The slight movement caused his blonde bangs to fall into his face, tickling Al's cheek. Al shook his head rapidly, earning a quiet chuckle from the currently blonde homunculus.

"Well that's alright… you're really rather cute, aren't you?" Envy grinned; his smile broadening when the young alchemist blushed.

"Still so innocent…" he breathed down Al's neck; enjoying the shudder the boy gave in response.

Al's breath hitched as he felt Envy's cool, southbound fingers lightly glide down his chest; unable to suppress the soft whimper that rose in his throat when Envy's fingers brushed against his arousal.

The many thoughts that had, up to this point, been racing through Al's mind scattered all at once upon the sensation of Envy's fingers slipping beneath his boxers and teasing him. He arched up in to shape shifter's touch, groaning softly.

Envy contented himself a while longer in listening to the harsh pants that escaped the brunette's lips in response to his ministrations –drinking in the sight of him all the while– before allowing his other hand to further explore Al's body.

"How far are you willing to go?"

Alphonse gasped when the Sin whispered abruptly into his ear; mewling when his tongue ghosted the shell of his ear. He suddenly became all too aware of the blonde's fingers gliding down the small of his back –at an excruciatingly slow speed– and coming to a halt just above his entrance.

"Nii-…san, I…it… I want it—need… need it--you… so bad," Al managed to get out between pants.

His "brother" smirked in such a way that (Al couldn't help but to think) the realEdward never would. Satisfied with the teen's answer, the blonde Homunculus went ahead and pushed the brunette onto his front; grasping his hips and thrusting into him without any further warning.

Alphonse couldn't help it; he let out an inhuman sounding scream upon the sudden intrusion; tears immediately springing to his eyes. He clenched the bed sheets tightly and rubbed his eyes against his fists furiously.

"…Disgusting."

Alphonse only just managed to catch the last word of whatever the Sin had been hissing into his ear. As his body accommodated the intrusion –he was thanking whatever God there was that Envy had paused for the moment, allowing him to adjust– he strained to listen to what Edward's look-alike was saying to him.

"How can you think this way about me, Al? You're so sick…what's wrong with you?" Edward's voice snapped accusingly; breaking the previously quiet atmosphere.

Alphonse released a breath that he hadn't been aware he'd been holding when he let out a small sigh of relief when Envy pulled out-- only to emit a soft scream when the androgynous Homunculus thrust into him again.

Al gritted his teeth; blinking rapidly to clear the stinging tears from his eyes.

"What kind of little brother are you? It's all you're fault I have these damned automail limbs!" Envy continued, a sneer making itself evident when he heard a pained, choked sob.

"'m sorry," Alphonse gasped, wincing when Envy gave another rather violent trust into him.

"I spent years working endlessly to restore your body, Al; years. I don't find that it's quite fair that you're perfectly normal, and I'm the one stuck with these pathetic excuses for an arm and leg!" The blonde growled angrily, knocking his left leg against Al's thigh for emphasis.

A loud moan suddenly caught within the brunette's throat when Envy plunged into him deeper and just brushed against something that nearly made him dizzy with pleasure; that pleasure only increasing as he felt cool metal brush against his member.

"I'm sorry, Nii-san!" Al groaned as he buried his face into the pillows; raising his hips slightly to meet Envy's thrusts and increase the friction between their sweat-slicked bodies.

"I hate you. I despise you, Al-- you and your filthy thoughts!"

Alphonse was openly sobbing at this point; whether it was from pain or pleasure, guilt or sorrow –or a little of each– he wasn't quite sure. All he knew was the pain of the truth in Envy's words mixed with the blinding pleasure he now felt each time the shape-shifter drove into him; each thrust bringing him closer to release.

"I hate you."

'I'm sorry…'

"I hate you, Alphonse! You don't even deserve my love!"

'Nii-san…'

"I hate you!"

"I'M SORRY!" Alphonse screamed hysterically as he came, allowing his weak knees to simply give out beneath him so that he was crumpled into a miserable heap; sobbing uncontrollably.

With a flash of light, Envy was donning his usual attire and looked like himself once more. As he got to his feet, he found himself staring at the heartbroken brunette, as well as wondering how much he'd broken the poor boy's spirit.

Envy made his way to the open window wordlessly, but paused just as he sat crouched on the window sill, ready to take his leave.

"Just remember, Alphonse—you did this to yourself," he said indifferently, glancing back toward the alchemist coldly, before he jumped out and disappeared into the night, leaving a dejected younger brother to sort his jumbled thoughts and regrets.

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Jessie: …

Joh: …

Jessie: Well, that came about much better than I had originally anticipated.

Joh: Blinks Wow.

Jessie: This was…pretty angst-y for me, huh? I wasn't going to finish this, but Joh kept insisted that I do, right, Sis?

Joh: …Wow.

Jessie: Sighs Sorry, she's currently obsessing over Kingdom Hearts, and can't really be bothered to comment any further.

Joh: Twitch Heh, heh… Die, Luxord, die. Die as a die! Get it, Jessie? Get it?! A die!!—

Jessie: —So anyways, please don't flame me for writing angst; Joh isn't the only one of us who writes angst.

Joh: Shakes a fist I'll never forgive you, Luxord!

Jessie: Joh, you already beat him!

PLEASE REVIEW!!!

(Please tell me if you believe this fic could be continued… I'm considering it.)