Envious Ways

Abby Ebon

AN: An Ed/Envy fic for Chaos-Chan's b-day…which is on the 25…Happy B-Day! Check out her stuff!

-Ed-

They had gone beyond the Gate, and found that 'equivalences exchanges' and the science of alchemy were utterly and completely useless here. It simply did not work. And that aggravated Ed beyond speech sometimes.

Where was 'here' exactly?

Nowhere, anywhere, because Ed sure as hell didn't know…

Envy had teased that they could be in any 'when' too, but Ed didn't even want to think about that possibility. It opened up far too many uncomfortable possibilities. Ed still remembered that cursed day…

There had been pain, sure, lots of it. What was worse for Ed… was the feeling of something essential within him missing…? Ed didn't know what, exactly, that could be though. 'Al…' The merest thought of his baby brother, alone, or worse- never knowing if Al lived, was okay, was even happy…it brought a pain he hadn't felt since his mother's death.

He didn't think he could survive for so long this time, because he had nothing to believe in, his mother was gone now- he knew that. And he was useless here, because when he had tried to use his alchemy to get water for his parched throat (and he was still thirsty) – nothing had happened.

Not even using a circle had helped him focus. It had accrued to him that perhaps that was what the emptiness inside him was- that his ability to use alchemy was gone for good- but that couldn't be, because he had been taught that it was like a science- it was always there…but it wasn't…not here, Beyond the Gate.

The place he found himself in was an island, the likes of which he had never seen before…

The ocean was black, inky, like nights darkest shadows…as if there was no sky and if there was, or wasn't, a bottom to this ocean- Ed wasn't going to volunteer to prove it was so. The sky was a bloody red and the sun even more so. He could look safely at this sun, stare at it, and marvel at the shifting crimsons and bloody-ruby colors swirling with black. Sometimes he did that for whole days uninterrupted…

There wouldn't be a difference between night and day- save that there were three little moons…They were different shades too, one was as blue as the oceans and skies at home, and it was the biggest. The second was smaller then both, and brighter- like a little pearl hanging on the necklace of the night sky, for it out shown even the stars…

The third was a swirl of golden and green, and Envy had laughed when he saw it- and when Ed had gotten the idiot to shut up, and tell him what was so funny… (Because the Gods knew he needed a good laugh too now-a-days) Envy's answer had made him wish he hadn't asked…

"That third moon's like us, Chibi, all mixed up- and stuck together." Envy had said this with a wide grin, expecting Ed to find it humorous as well…but it hadn't been not really, it had made Ed sneak away at daybreak- with the convent excuse of exploring…

Truthfully neither of them knew if this was an island, or the mainland. They had only been here a week, by the red-suns slowly moving time. They had found no sign of human life- but there were things like plants…only not. The things were like metal, only soft- and if cut they bled grey-red sap. Which was what Envy had been surviving on; apparently they were like the red-stones for the homunculi only better.

Envy had been the acting food-tester, for neither of them had heard of a homunculi dieing of food poisoning. So far they had found three things Ed could safely consume. One was what grew from the grey-red sapped trees. A 'food' with a leathery hide the size of a large ball, it was fuzzy, but inside it tasted like…peanut butter and milk (of all things). It was purple…and looked like jelly.

The second thing was a 'rock' or 'shell' that was some sort of ocean-life. Envy had tricked him into eating something form the ink-ocean, otherwise Ed would have stormed off in disgust. It was meant to act like meat, but tasted sugary and far too sweet to eat too much of.

Last was a liquid that acted solid, until you picked it from the glass-like bushes…it smelled like cat-piss, was greenish, and tasted like fruit-juice. Drinking it had lead to entertainment for Envy, because Ed had honestly expected to taste like…well piss. In the end Ed would drink it - but it took a while to teach his senses he wasn't going to swallow something nasty.

Altogether it had been interesting, and far too entertaining for a certain homunculi. They hadn't found any animals, so aside from the ink-ocean or the metal-trees, they were alone here. Days passed like dreams, if you didn't pay too much attention, the day would pass quickly, or slowly.

Weather was unpredictable, like in the higher mountains; it was both clear and about to rain. Or drenching you in minutes- then snowing. Or something like snow…and hail. Ed liked being short here, because he could stuff himself into caves, while Envy had to suffer if he was caught in a storm.

Or try for the shelter.

Envy had built a tree-house out of the metal-trees (which was how he had found out about the sap and 'fruit') it turned they were only soft-wood for about a day after being cut. Then they became like stone, heavy, and imposable to manage with only two people. The glass-bushes which were spare else where, but aplenty near the metal-trees had become the ladder to reach the tree house.

Which had two advantages, one was the glass-bushes had sharp-edges, which acted as defense-mechanisms. So if there was anything here with intent to harm them, it'd have to stumble through an acre of glass-bushes. Then climb the glass ladder, which couldn't take more then one of them climbing at once.

Other then slow-moving leach- snail things, that were everywhere (obviously this world's version of pesky bugs) there were no other critters that Ed could see. It had occurred to him one night that the animals could be invisible at night. Envy had laughed it off then, claiming Ed had too much of an imagination (which was true- but Ed wasn't admitting it), but Ed had noticed his companion's recent bout of jumpiness.

Envy could still change his form, which had been a relief, because Ed had found him as a dragon-like… thing. Ed had ran screaming after spotting Envy- but Envy having spotting Ed, had chased him (as a dragon) and easily caught up when Ed had tripped. When Envy had changed into his normal form, Ed had been both relived, (another 'human' face, he hadn't been totally alone after all) and depressed, (who'd want to spend forever with their worst enemy) from then they had called truce- just until they got out of this Place beyond the Gate.

A glass-bush snapped, and Ed – who had been lost in thought and memories, jumped back to reality. He looked up to find Envy approaching, Envy offered a smile and Ed- not in the mood to smile back, just nodded.

"Chibi…Is there...something the matter?" Envy asked as he settled on the ashy-blue sand next to Ed. Ed shrugged, and glanced at the bloody sky. "Just remembering I guess…" He whispered. That was another thing, here, there were always noise- the wind rustling the glass-bushes to music, the metal-tress cracking and popping new 'fruit' or limbs, even the ink-ocean rushing back and forth on ashy-blue sands, like the heartbeat of the planet.

"Remembering what?" Envy asked, dissatisfied with Ed's attempt to cheat him of a chat.

"The sounds of home…touch of real sand…and stuff." Ed answered his voice soft against the nearby rushing ink-ocean. Envy grunted, and picked a blade of glass-bush, even as it pricked him and he bled red on the clear crystalline surface. Envy did that sometimes, Ed had at first thought that Envy did it to annoy him, but now he wasn't so sure…

-Envy –

Risking a glance at him is chancy; if he is aware of it- he expects me to speak. If he unaware of me or otherwise focused, I only have a while before he 'comes back' and I must not get lost in looking at him…

Bleeding my self on the weird glass bushes makes him forget me for a bit. Because he's just looking at the blood…and thinking- ah, but how I wish I knew what his thoughts are when he looks upon my blood. Here where everything is new, and strange, he still fascinates me the most. I know he does not think much of me, and if he does, not much of it is good-willed.

I've grown to accept this; I have the time to change it. I decide to break the silence between us.

"Stuff, eh, like sex?" I grin impish, and it has an effect. His cheeks blush crimson, and he quickly looks away from me. "No not that! Like…like if they are alright or not…and if we get back will they…" He trails off, a sad frown upon his lips. He spares no amount of thoughts on 'them', those who he considers friends and co-workers. I'm almost sorry I killed one of them, but it was my job to do so, and if it had not been that one- it would have been another.

His blush though…that was interesting, is it possible my Chibi is getting horny? I stop a snicker from starting, and pat him on the shoulder. "You can see them anytime you wish Chibi…you only need to ask." I say changing into his baby brother as I speak. He glances at me.

"Stop it Envy, you know it's not the same thing…" Indeed I do Ed, indeed I do…I change back just so he stops looking at me so painfully, with such…longing. The quick change startles him, and for a moment I see regret, and then he is standing up and leaving me to look out at the ink-black ocean. There is some sort of poetic justice in this, but I am not in the mood to fish it out.

I hear the glass clanging and chiming as he moves away. I watch the skies, blood-red and gold clouded- like his eyes…

A while later, I do not know how much time has passed, because it is easy to lose or gain here, I hear the glass bushes chiming again, thinking it is Ed, I do not turn around. "Come crawling back have you Chibi?" There is no response for a moment, which I find is the usual manner of things.

Then I hear the pitiful chime of a blade of glass braking under foot, alarmed, I turn…and am confronted with something which I jump to think is from the Gate. It is not…It's tall, perhaps nine feet. It's scaled, horned, and has wicked claws. No tail though, I'm almost disappointed. Demons should have tails.

Its scales are as black-as-night, and it has silver eyes. No pupil, no whites, just silver. I almost think its blind, and then it seems to glare at me. It's wearing cloths though, so it must be 'civilized' by its own thinking. The clothes are dark, and muted, like everything here. It doesn't have any weapons, but then by the shear size of it, it really doesn't need them. It 'speaks' aloud in a series of fast-phased clicks and high-pitched whistles.

I imagine switching forms would do more harm then good at the moment. It motions for me to rise, and I do, then it grabs my shoulder and 'speaks' again into a metal device. I hear a human scream, and leap toward it, but this being is too strong for me to imminently break his hold of me. I'm impressed it knows my weakness already.

He will be alright…he was startled by our appearances… The demon explains, into my head. I am suddenly very uncomfortable with the 'demon'. We are Loll, not…demons… It says again, and probably senses my dislike of the invasion of my mind. Because it does not attempt a third contact even as it carries me through glass bushes, metal tress, and other things we have not yet explored. It moves very quickly, and I do not think that afoot I could keep up, so it is just as well that it carries me.

We arrive in a camp-dwelling of sorts, it seems these Loll's do not like trees, for there is acre upon acre of nothing. Not even glass bushes. The dwelling is made of the blue dirt that clings to everything. The Loll simply drops me once we are inside. I see Ed huddling in the corner, fingering a slash on his arm. It bleeds heavy, but I can tell it isn't deep. None the less I glare daggers at my 'escort'.

We apologize for the damage Child-ling, it was you who wished to run through the makigi bushes. The Loll spoke into both of our minds this time, 'showing' the 'makigi' to be the glass- bushes, for I saw Ed jump and eye the Loll indirectly. My name is Shika, what are yours? Ed and I trade a glance; there is no harm in name trading…

"Ed." He says softly, rising from his crouched position to stand near me. The Loll is tall indeed, yet we get a sense of unity this way, the Shika seemed to sense this, though he, she, it…says nothing of it.

"Envy." I say dry-witted, the silver eyed one blinks once, but otherwise seems to take things in stride. I can't wait till it finds out what homunculi are…

-Ed-

"What's with kidnapping us?" I say aloud - upset, and yet confused that these beings can understand our language, yet have to speak mind to mind for us to understand them. As if to prove my point, as they carried me, they seemed to speak with eachother in low-pitched growls and snarls to get this place. All of this proof seemed to give way that I can't understand them otherwise. No matter that I didn't like the method.

We meant no harm to you, this is a preservation park, and it is the mating season in two nights… Shika explains, as if we are dull-witted. Envy chokes, and I blink- it dawns on me that these 'people' could probably kill us trying to do…that. I blush heavily. Envy takes one look at me and starts giggling.

We are, Shika continues bluntly, despite Envy's giggles, highly territorial… So it'd be more likely they'd kill us then want babies from us…or whatever the results are from their mating.

You are to stay here for the next few days, we have observed your eating habits, and the appropriate foods will be in stock here. The mating lasts as long as a week…after which we shall return to speak at length with you about your…kind. Shika finished, and with that the Loll turned and left us alone.

I finally took the time to look around the dwelling. It had one large cloth covered 'bed', and a fire pit, there was a cloth that felt oily - and I half feared it was the scales shed by the Loll - it covered the entrance to the food that had been promised. Even if they had been in a rush, it was neatly ordered. I sighed, the red sun was setting, and it was getting colder- it would probably rain tonight.

Since there was plenty of things to think about neither of us would be sleeping tonight. Which meant tomorrow we would be napping all day, and then the Loll's 'mating season' would be upon us.

"Some day, right Chibi?" Envy said, going over to the cot and laying down- Ed having no choice but to lying across from him. They talked together for quite some time, about the things they had seen on the race to the dwelling, how many Lolls they had counted, what the Lolls might do to them, how many there might be world-wide. Sometime the next day Envy woke wrapped around the braided-boy, who had curled around him for warmth, and smiled softly down at him, and mused on the fact that he couldn't remember ever being happier.

-Elsewhere-

For the first time in a year the red flowers with grey stems bloomed. Releasing into the air a chemical that induced sexual hormones for the next four days…world wide…

AN: So...um...should I even bother making it two chapters? Yes I know I should be working on the other fics, but I wanted to make sure I didn't forget to do a B-Day fic...-whimpers- I couldn't help myself!