A/N: I suppose I knew that the time would always come when I had to do a femmeslash fic, being bisexual and all. I just never knew I would be writing it at the same time I'm writing a slash fic. Well, this one is going to be…ah, well, I'm sure I'll have it figured out by the end of this A/N. I'm strongly leaning towards a Hermione/Pansy fic. yes, I think that'll be it. Except…this one will have no book basing. Meaning, um, yeah…I'm not sure how I'm going to do this. Oh. YES! Yes I do. It will be an AU fic. You know, the cliché where magic doesn't exist, and Hogwarts is a Muggle high school. Only…mine will be different because it won't focus around Harry and Draco. I mean, sure, I'll mention them, and how they're together, and if someone wants me to, I'll write a smut scene between them, and if a person asks I'll write a prequel about how they get together, but instead, it'll focus on Pansy and Hermione, and their rivalry. It'll also include scenes between other gay couples. Oooh! I've got a good idea! I'll make them all AMERICAN! YAY! Okay, I'm a bit psycho. Um…it's set in New York, which I've only visited like, twice, but it was WAY COOL! Only, it was really cold and dry. Being from Texas, I'm not so used to that. BTW, my state ROCKS! I mean, seriously, our capitol is pink, and a gay homeless guy walks around town in drag, and is named Leslie. How cool is that? Okay, a bit off topic. Sorry; I'm hyper b/c it's late and I just ate some mint cookies. Okay, this is what we call and 'interactive fic', meaning, as I'm sure you all know, you, the reviewers, get input on what happens. Not in the first chapter, of course, but later on. I've got a basic plot structure, but I'll be happy to take suggestions for pairings and wishes. All right! Enjoy the fic! Adios!

-CatJetRat

Disclaimer: I don't own shit 'cept an ill-tempered cat and way too many books.

Summary: AU, set in New York, present day. Bookworm Hermione Granger and cheerleader Pansy Parkinson have always hated each other. But what happens when Pansy reveals something very interesting about herself to the school?

Pairings: Hermione/Pansy, Harry/Draco, Ron/???(you tell me!), Ginny/???(ditto), Seamus/Justin, and any other pairings you want just request them and I'll integrate them in somehow.

Chapter 1

Gay, Straight, and a Little Fruity

Pansy's POV

There she was, looking shy and pretty, as usual. My eyes narrowed for a moment, and I lashed out. "Hey, Granger, what's with that hairstyle? Curls went out in the 80s, didn't you hear?"

Hurt flashed briefly in her eyes before they too narrowed, and she snarled back, "Hah! At least I try to have style."

I smirked. "Nice try, Granger, but no dice. I dress like a fashion model, whereas you dress like the librarian." My cronies around me laughed stupidly. Good god, I hated them all. They didn't have enough brains to fill a teacup.

Her eyes narrowed and she stalked away, defeated. I watched her ass as she left, cursing myself. We may have been enemies, but I damned myself every time I insulted her. My heart ached as I realized that I had probably made her day worse. Draco walked up to me.

"Hello, Pansy, darling," he said dramatically, slinging his arm around my shoulder. I merely grunted in reply.

"What's wrong?" He asked, looking concerned. He glanced in the direction I was staring, and noticed Hermione conversing darkly with her friends, Ron Weasley, Lavender Brown, Parvati and Padma Patil, Seamus Finnigan, Dean Thomas, and Harry Potter. Draco's eyes lingered on Potter for a moment, who looked back and smiled, coming up to us. Potter was the star center on the basketball team. He had gorgeous black hair streaked with red and blue, an earring in his left ear, emerald green eyes, and a fantastic, tanned body. His only flaw was a lightening-bolt scar on his forehead, due to the fact that when he was a baby, the mass murderer Tom Riddle, who called himself Lord Voldemort, had come into Harry's house and killed both of his parents, leaving Harry alive if only because the cops caught him right before he killed Harry. Harry was left with the scar because Voldemort, being very sick, only went after people with babies. After killing the parents, he carved his symbol, a lightening bolt, onto the forehead of the parents, then onto the living baby or babies' foreheads, and then killed them. There wasn't a soul who survived to bear the mark, except for Harry. Because of this, the papers called him the Boy-Who-Lived, making him semi-famous in New York City, where the killings happened. Voldemort was currently serving life in prison in the state prison.

But Harry was more than a hottie and the Boy-Who-Lived. He also happened to be Draco's boyfriend. He came up and wrapped his arms around Draco's neck, engulfing him in a fantastic Battle of the tongues. I looked towards Hermione again, and felt that longing in my heart. Oh, what I wouldn't give to be able to go up to her like that. To kiss her, hold her, and hug her. Protect her against everything. Except myself, it seemed.

Harry and Draco broke apart, their lips flushed. I loved my school. It was so open to everything, to all types of people. Draco, by the way, didn't look so bad himself. With white-blond hair, pale skin, and stunning silver eyes, sporting a nipple ring and a ring shaped like a snake he and Harry were easily the hottest two guys in school. Easily. I only knew about the nipple ring because of the brief time he and I had dated, before he realized that he was gay and so did I. Only he was open about it. I was still in the closet, except mine wasn't glass, the way some people's were. My eyes flickered towards the flaming Seamus Finnigan, who had a huge crush on Justin Finch-Fletchley, a more open gay guy.

Draco turned back towards me, a slight smile curving his lips. "Let me guess," he said in a low voice so only Harry and I could hear him. "You said one of your typically bitchy things to Granger, and now you're berating yourself for it?"

My eyes narrowed. "Fuck off," I muttered. Draco had been the first person I had told about my infatuation with Granger. When he had gotten together with Potter, Draco had persuaded me to let Potter know to, considering that he was one of Hermione's close friends.

Draco smirked. "Aww, sweetie," he said, smirking. "You just wait. One day you and Granger will have a hot, steaming relationship, and you can go get your twats pierced together."

Harry gagged, and I laughed. Despite his relentless teasing, Draco always made me feel better. Argus Filch, a hall monitor and janitor swept by and snarled, "Shouldn't you three be getting to class?"

"Yes, Mr. Filch," we all said automatically. I rolled my eyes at Harry and Draco, and we split up, Harry and Draco going to Chemistry with Mr. Snape, and I had Home Ec with Mrs. Sprout and Hermione. I prepared myself for another torturous class in which I tried to avoid being mean to Hermione, but inevitably was.

Hermione's POV

I sighed as I headed towards Home Economics. I wanted to skip the class, in fact, I probably could and get away with it. I had always been a good cook, and besides, I was Valedictorian of my Junior class, soon to be Valedictorian of my Senior class. School was ending in approximately four weeks, which thrilled me. To not have to deal with Pansy Parkinson for three months was a prospect that lured and tempted me until I was practically panting. Besides, school was useless to me. I already knew everything my teachers were going to teach me for eleventh and twelfth grade and beyond. I needed none of it. In fact, the only reason I hadn't already graduated was because I wanted to stay with my friends and graduate with them.

I spotted Pansy Parkinson ahead of me, looking pissy. I smiled slightly, thinking of what Seamus would say: "Honey, she just needs to get laid." I laughed softly, and cautiously observed her face, being careful to make sure she wouldn't catch me looking. The problem with being enemies with someone like Pansy Parkinson was that she was absolutely gorgeous, and alluring. When we were younger, she had had a rather pug-like appearance to her face, but then she had grown up, physically matured, and had become very beautiful, with long, bouncy blonde hair, smooth, full pink lips, tanned skin, she was slender, and had very large, full breasts which someone could just stroke and cup their hand around, and run their other hand down her flat stomach and down her skirt and—

No. No I would not let myself have these thoughts. These were bad, unproductive thoughts which led to more bad, unproductive thoughts. I would think about another girl, who wasn't a complete bitch, who didn't hate me, and who was actually gay. Not, of course, that I could tell if another girl was gay to save my life, unless she actually told me, but still. Pansy was…what I wanted, and what I couldn't have. But I didn't fool myself. All I wanted was her body. She didn't have anything but filth in her head, and she was a bitch anyway. I sighed, and entered my home ec class, took my seat, and pulled out my notes.

Mrs. Sprout entered the room cheerfully. "Today we will be studying the art of caring for plants."

I rolled my eyes. My father loved gardening, so I knew everything there was to know on the subject. It often seemed like Sprout's favorite subject was plants, though I couldn't imagine why. I tuned out as she started rattling on about weeds, and sought out Pansy. She was staring at me, probably trying to find something else to insult me about. Our eyes met, and for some reason she blushed, looking embarrassed. I frowned. I could not imagine why she would look like that. I held her gaze, staring into pale blue eyes that loathed me, yet for some reason I couldn't find any hatred in there. Just slight embarrassment, confusion, and another emotion I couldn't identify. Her gaze flickered down briefly to my chest, and I was struck by a strange thought. She's a lesbian.

I banished this thought quickly, because it was absurd, but I stared at her long after she had looked away, through the strands of my curly brown hair. There was something there, and I didn't know what. But I vowed to find out.

Harry's POV

I stared in boredom as Mr. Snape began outlining chemical equations and reactions, or something. I didn't understand Chemistry at all, and only passed the class because Draco loved Chemistry and was very good at it.

Draco….

I grinned and fell into my favorite activity: Watching Draco. He was so gorgeous, and beautiful, and all the words that were synonymous with beautiful. I loved the way his blond hair fell across his eyes as he worked, and his slender fingers as they wrote diligently. I loved his nipple ring, and his warm cock as it brushed against mine when we—

"Mr. Potter!" Snape's cold voice snapped me away from my favorite activity.

"Yes?" I said, feeling irritated.

"What would happen if you burned copper?"

"Um…." My brain went into lockdown. I had retained absolutely nothing from a year of the subject. Except…. "Won't the copper turned green?"

"Yes," Snape said grudgingly. "But why?"

My momentary glee at getting it right faded. This I did not know. I only knew that copper turned green because I thought it looked cool and had burned copious amounts of it in order to see that pretty green color. "I, um, am not really sure."

Snape rolled his eyes and began explaining in detail just why copper turned green. This information went in one ear, out the other. I had no use for it. I wanted to be a basketball player when I grew up. Goodness only knew what Draco wanted to be. He was intelligent enough to be anything. I started watching him again. Smirking, I innocently slipped a hand underneath the table and unzipped his pants. His head shot up from the notes he was taking as my hand slid into his boxers. He shot me an angry look which I returned with a lazy grin and he shook his head. Annoyed, I pulled my hand out of his pants and zipped them up. Lavender, sitting next to us, was grinning suggestively. I grinned back. I was in a good mood for the rest of the class, because for the rest of the class, I noticed that Draco's jeans looked much tighter than normal.

After class was over, and the day, Draco grabbed my arm and yanked me out of class. "Let's go," he said tersely. I grinned.

"Hang on," I said. "I have to go to my locker." I knew what his problem was, and I wanted to torture him. For some strange reason, I mysteriously forgot my locker combination, and was forced to move it around for several minutes while Draco twitched impatiently. I finally got it open, grabbed my backpack and homework, and said, "All right, I'm ready now." He then grabbed me and pulled me out of the school into the glorious sunshine.

Draco's POV

My god, my boyfriend was a sadistic little shit. First he tries to jerk me off in class, leaving me horny for thirty minutes, and then he has the nerve to make me wait around for another ten while he fiddles with his locker. And then finally, finally he's ready, and I pulled him out into the parking lot of our school. Unable to contain myself, I picked him up in my arms and began kissing him fiercely. Then I shoved him into my car and took him home, where we had the whole place to ourselves. Finally.

Hermione's POV

I put away the last of my homework, exhaled, and glanced at the clock. It was only six thirty, an hour until dinner. While my homework would have taken most people three or four hours to finish, it took me less than two, due to my above-average intelligence. My parents didn't know this, of course, and I didn't see any reason to enlighten them. It gave me some time to myself.

My parents were, unfortunately, conservative Republicans, and Christians. They were firmly against cloning, abortion, homosexuality, not to mention gay marriage, and were behind Mr. Bush 100 percent.

I wasn't. Besides being gay, I was also very liberal. This was only because my parents worked all the time, and I was raised by a nanny, who was an Atheist Democrat, and I grew up listening to her rant about Christians and Republicans and homophobes. My parents didn't find out about her until I was almost sixteen, but by then, the damage had been done. Oh, they kicked her out and raved about how wrong she was, but by then I too was an atheist, at the most an agnostic. My belief is that yes, there may be a god, or something, but I'm not arrogant enough to assume that I know what it is, or wants, or believes. I'm also not arrogant enough to say that there isn't one. Just that I haven't seen sufficient proof that there is. I was also a liberal Democrat. However, I wasn't foolish enough to tell my parents this. Instead I reassured them that of course I supported their ignorant, hateful beliefs and that fraud in the White House. I didn't put it like that, of course, but I managed to reassure them so that they left me alone. I even went to church with them every Sunday. I just ignored the Minister and worked on my homework in a bible.

I sighed and pulled out a razor. I carefully pulled down my sleeve and made a tiny incision on the inside of my left arm. A tiny, thin pool of blood followed, and I exhaled heavily. It was so nice to relax this way. I used to use writing, but that took too long. Besides, this was quick and easy. My skin healed quickly, though it left tiny, almost invisible scars that weren't a big deal. I slipped my razor back into its hiding place beneath my lamp, blotted at the blood, which had already begun to clot, and pulled my sleeve back down. It was still slightly cold out, so no one would question the long sleeves.

I pulled out my copy of Playboy, unbuttoned my pants, and slipped my hand in. This was another way of relaxing. I finished rather quickly, for I had a lot of practice, and zipped my pants back up, put the Playboy away, and read until dinner was ready. Really, my life wasn't that bad.

A/N: Uh-huh. Yes, I know, I didn't mention the cutting thing. But don't worry. All will become apparent later. Well, REVIEW!!!!! Five reviews gets another chapter! If y'all want a teaser, just ask. Adios!

-CatJetRat