With or Without Big Ears
Her favorite time of day was dusk, when she was just a little girl, and her Mama would gather her up on her lap and read her a fairy-tale story for bedtime. After a while Meng refused to go to sleep without one.
Then after Mama blew out the reading-candle and crept out of the room, Meng would sneak over to the window and pick out the "most sparkiliest" (as she liked to put it) star, and wish that one day she would have her own fairy-tale ending. That one day she would be lovely like the girls in the story, and that she and the hero would fall madly in love.
Perhaps that's the reason she was so excited when that traveling fortune-teller moved to town. Meng visited every day, and she was eventually offered a job there. Aunt Wu would often tease her that the real reason she stayed in their village was because of Meng, even though they both knew it was because her old bones were tired and she needed to settle down.
And every so often Meng would check up on her fairy-tale life. The list was a top secret one, and always hidden away in the bottom of her drawer, not that any one would try to take it. She had no friends beside the old woman, they all said she played pretend to much, but what they didn't know was that she wasn't playing. The edges of the paper were frayed, and the ink was smudged by her pudgy fingers (how she wished they were long and delicate like the ones the princesses had) but she pulled it out anyway, and skimmed her plan.
1. Rich/Royal family
2. Drop dead gorgeous-ness
3. Magical old woman
4. Handsome Prince/Hero who falls in love with beautiful Princess (me)
One out of four, that's not so bad. Most of the time hope would pull her through, but there were times when the young girl gave in to the rush of worry and doubt. "But Aunt Wu, what if I never grow beautiful? What if my family never becomes rich and my hero doesn't like me because of my funny frazzle hair?" So the fortune-teller read her palm, and made up that "big ears" bit, and told Meng that if she could love someone with big ears, then that someone could love her and her frazzle hair.
It must have been fate that barely two weeks passed before the Avatar and his friends showed up. Meng was so busy obsessing over his huge ears that she didn't even notice that beautiful Water Tribe girl that traveled with the Avatar… or the way he looked at her. All she did know was this boy was making her face flush and her heart pound, and she wanted to do everything and anything to make him happy.
And most importantly, he had big ears.
Then there was the time when she got him some bean curd puffs (they were really for this weird friend, but a girl could pretend, right?) and on the way she tripped, and practically fell onto his lap. At first her thoughts were of how he actually sort of caught her, and how sweet he was for saving her, and oh that means he must really like me. Then they switched to things like oh, what if I'm squishing him, and what if he thinks I'm clumsy? But soon all thoughts were erased when all she could feel was the warmth of his hands.
Realizing how long she had been sitting there holding onto his hands her face lit up with the rosy tint of her cheeks, and she yanked her head up… at the exact same time he did. Her thoughts started with an, oh good thing we didn't bump heads, then changed into something like, oh my gosh, our faces are practically touching! But soon all thoughts were forgotten when she looked past their awkward situation and into his deep gray eyes.
Her heat began to pound so badly, and her head began to spin so fast she thought she was
going to faint. Ungracefully thrusting the bean curd puffs into the boy's lap and letting out an embarrassed laugh she dashed into the hallway, safely hidden from the boy's view. That boy… Aang was his name. Meng couldn't even remember them telling their names, but they apparently did. Though she should be crying from embarrassment, as she sat there in the hallway the only thing she could think about was how Meng and Aang rhyme, that must be a sign.
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Hands touch, eyes meet
Sudden silence, sudden heat
Hearts leap in a giddy whirl
He could be that boy
But I'm not that girl
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Her favorite time of day was dusk, when she had the cover of darkness, but still a bit of light from the sun to guide her as she tracked around the small town. Meng never once thought it the least bit creepy how she followed the Avatar and his friends around, most people did anyway…. Just for a different reason.
So she kept at it, following them to wherever they were going at sunset, just hoping one day he would notice her. The trouble was, he was too busy watching a different girl to pay any attention to her.
Aunt Wu warned her. She told Meng not to get too caught up in everything that was going on, and that even though this boy's ears were big, dreams still weren't real and they never would be. She had to spell it out for Meng that she was just a little girl with frazzle hair, and that this boy was the Avatar.
And if she thought that telling the young girl the truth at such an early age was hard, it must have been harder to watch her cry.
But still Meng followed them, only now she followed like she was lost, memorizing every little thing this wonderful boy did, every feeling he gave her, even though she knew it would hurt her in the long run.
Aunt Wu used to tell her that although the truth can be cold and hard, it is much better than the burning, consuming heat of a lie. Meng was just starting to believe her.
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Don't dream too far
Don't lose sight of who you are
Don't remember that rush of joy
He could be that boy
I'm not that girl
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Her favorite time of day was dusk, when they were just closing down for the night and Meng could ask to get her palm read. If Aunt Wu wasn't too busy, she would usually comply, after all, it was a much healthier pastime than stalking the Avatar and his friends.
Although to Aunt Wu's dismay, the young child's question would always be the same: "Will Aang ever love me? What is he doing right this minute? Is he thinking about me? Is he, Aunt Wu?!?"
And the wishes for fairy-tales continued, but Meng now had a target. Instead of just wishing for a hero, she wished for Aang, the Avatar. She would get these palm readings as often as possible, but it seemed the longer she talked about Aang, the less Aunt Wu would give them.
It hurt her to see them leaving. She had spent so much time fantasizing about Aang, that she never got the chance to give it a second try. Hurt was such a simple word to use for the feelings she had, but upon seeing him leave her complex future had unraveled, and she because a rather simple girl.
Very much too frazzled and plain for someone like the Avatar.
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Ev'ry so often we long to steal
To the land of what-might-have-been
But that doesn't soften the ache we feel
When reality sets back in
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Her favorite time of day was dusk, when she could practice in secret. It was a good thing she had spent so much time watching, because it was all there in her mind, like a vividly painted picture. The girl Avatar Aang had fallen in love with, Meng knew everything she did, said, and even looked at. It was just one of the pluses of stalking the Avatar and his friends.
It was here, in the growing darkness Meng would mimic these things, in hopes she could transform her insides beautiful and her looks would get the hint and follow. Hold you teacup like this, fold your legs under you when you sit, walk with an extra swing in the hips.
Perhaps it would work. Perhaps with all this training she would grow beautiful, and she'd be ready to woo the next handsome hero that came her way. Perhaps Aunt Wu was wrong, and she could transform herself into a princess, and dreams could be dreams but also reality.
After many years if practicing, Meng would learn that fortune-tellers are never wrong.
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Blithe smile, lithe limb
She who's winsome, she wins him
Gold hair with a gentle curl
That's the girl he chose
And heaven knows
I'm not that girl…
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Her favorite time of that day was dusk, when she built a small fire out in front of the old fortune-telling shop and sat down next to it, alone.
The place had been closed for years, ever since Aunt Wu passed away. Nobody else occupied the space because they all thought Meng would take up the business soon, though the girl could never imagine working the shop with out the old woman there. She never told anyone this out of fear they would tear it down.
She couldn't let them rip the old building up, there was too much of her childhood still there, too many memories, and although her body was in the ground, Meng believed residing on the dusty old cushion in the reading-room was the spirit of the traveling fortune-teller, finally settling down.
She spent a lot of her time in that old building, usually on the bottom floor. Every once in a while she would have to wander upstairs, and when she did all she could remember was that boy, Aang.
In that very room many years ago she had poured her heart out to him, and he had broken it, along with all her wishes of the future. There was no more wishing for Meng. Not after that.
Then again, she remembers a lot of things. She also realizes how much of her life was wasted by wishing, fairy-tales and fortunes, crazy lists, and big ears. Touching the pocket of her dress, she remembers why she sits before the fire, and pulls out the old list.
With one last look, she sheds a tear and tosses it into the fire. It was time for a new start, one where she was Meng instead of trying to be a princess. A new start with new friends but the same old memories, and the same old afternoons spent at the same old fortune-telling shop, spending dusk always alone, but with the spirit of the same old woman from her past. If that isn't a fairy-tale, then what is?
The next day Meng would go to her drawer and dig out a piece of paper and a bottle of ink. She would look for a pretty feather, but settle on a stick, and write herself up a new list, only slightly different than her first:
1. Family who loves me
2. Confidence with the way I look (and maybe a new hair style.)
3. A wonderful best friend
4. A nice guy (with or without big ears)
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Don't wish, don't start
Wishing only wounds the heart
I wasn't born for the rose and pearl
There's a girl I know
He loves her so
I'm not that girl…
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Note: Well, here we are. Please review!