Disclaimer: Not mine. Oh well.

A/N: Just some hopelessly romantic and beautifully pointless fluff. If you're anything like me, you should love it.

Summary: Harry is turned on by the weirdest things…

"I'm getting tired. I think I'll go up to bed." Hermione yawned loudly and unfolded herself from where she was cuddled up on the couch next to Harry. Well, on top of Harry. She stood and stretched, then stumbled through the darkened living room. "Oof!"

Harry let his eyes adjust to the dark. His vision was speckled with white dots from watching the bright television. He found that Hermione had tripped over a chair and was now hopping up and down, clutching at her toe. Harry made his way over to her and placed his hands on her waist. She giggled.

"I'm fine!"

Harry was now accustomed to the darkness and he could make out her smiling face.

"One too many glasses of wine, I think."

Harry steadied her anyway, and make sure that she really was okay before allowing her to walk away. She carefully picked her way around another armchair and a basket of laundry. Her precision showed Harry that she had just been joking about the wine and that she wasn't actually drunk.

She headed up the stairs. Harry went over to the DVD player and squinted at it, using the florescent glow of the clock readout to find the eject button. Her couldn't see it. Closing his eyes, he let his fingers trace their way over all the buttons, trying to find the largest one he knew was marked "Power." He found it and pressed it, then stood back on his heels. A gurgling sound came from upstairs. Hermione had turned on a faucet.

Harry turned, wanting to join Hermione, whatever she was doing. He yawned and tripped over the same chair as Hermione had. He stopped to push it out of the way, but decided against it when the water ran again.

He ran up the stairs and stopped when he came to the bathroom door where light was flooding out into the hallway.

Hermione stood at the sink, a blue toothbrush hanging out of her mouth. She was making faces at herself in the mirror and jumped when she noticed Harry watching her, her eyes wide with the shock of being caught.

She smiled sheepishly and returned to brushing her teeth, thinking he would leave. She was wrong. She ran the toothbrush over each of her teeth, then leaned over the sink, held her ponytail back with one hand, and spit.

Harry was amazed at how she could make something this un-sexy so incredibly hot. The glob of foamy paste emerged from her lips, dangled, and dripped into the sink. Harry watched her, mesmerized.

Hermione wiped the back of her hand across her face and looked up to the mirror to find that Harry was still in the reflection. "You okay?"

Harry gulped and nodded. His curvaceous brunette rolled her eyes, but she was smiling.

Raising her hands to her hair, she pulled out the hair band holding her hair back in a pony and threw it into a dish on the counter. Her hair fell around her shoulders. She ran her fingers through it, fluffing it up. She flipped her head down, shook it, and flipped back up. Her face was flushed.

She walked past Harry, back into the hallway. Harry stood where he was, never lifting his gaze. After opening the door to the linen closet, Hermione selected something from the middle shelf. She squeezed past Harry back into the bathroom and ran the water once again. She waited until the stream was steaming hot before wetting down a green washcloth. She raised the cloth to her face. Harry could see her breathe a sigh of pleasure at the warmth.

Her chest rose and fell one more time, then she rubbed the cloth over her face. When she lowered it there was a black ring around each eye. Harry smiled. Raccoon eyes.

He moved into the brightness of the bathroom and over next to Hermione. She still hadn't noticed her smeared makeup and had a questioning look in her eyes. Harry raised his hand to her face and firmly but gently wiped the mascara away with his thumb. He let his hand linger for a second after both eyes were free of the black mess. Hermione smiled at him.

He stepped back to his place in the doorway and waited for her to do something else. The washrag was flung over the side of the shower. Her toothbrush was put back into the drawer. She filled a paper cup with water and drank it, swishing it around her mouth before spitting. Harry watched her, his heart (and other parts of his body) swelling with each passing second. He loved her so much that sometimes it hurt.

He followed her into their bedroom, where once again he watched from the door. She unbuttoned her shirt, dropped it, and stepped out of her jeans. Turning her back to Harry, she unclasped her black lace bra and let it fall to the floor leaving her in only her panties. It didn't matter that she wasn't facing him; Harry could still make out plenty of the skin of her perfectly round breasts. She reached down and picked up one his shirts from a stack of clean laundry and pulled it over her head. It came to just past her panty line. The gray color and bagginess of it didn't do a thing for her, but she was still beautiful. She climbed into bed and pulled the covers up around her.

Harry stripped down to his boxers and, after turning out the lights, joined Hermione under the downy blankets. She fell towards his weight and his face was lost in her mane of bushy brown hair. It smelled floral and fresh. he breathed in deeply and placed a kiss on the side of her head. He wrapped his arms around her and she sunk in closer to him.

Though it was dark, he could make out her eyes by their luminous sparkle. She yawned before she spoke. "Do you want to… you know?"

Harry looked down at Hermione. She was the most gorgeous and perfect girlfriend he could ever have imagined. Of course he wanted to. Who wouldn't?

She was still looking up at him with an intense desire to please him in her glittering eyes. In her drooping eyes. She was tired and yet Harry knew he could still get a shag in if he said he wanted one. God, did he mention she was perfect?

"No, that's okay Beautiful." She smiled and leaned into him. Their lips connected for a brief moment before Hermione let her head fall back on her pillow.

Harry leaned in for another kiss, but she was already asleep. He curled up around her and fell asleep himself.