A/N: For those of you who still don't know for some odd and obscure reason; This.Is.A.Fic.With.Gay.Boys.In.It.They.Kiss – get over it or get out XP Actually they are probably Bi but they still kiss each other so there is still that need to get over it Much Love S
Chapter 7
He Doesn't Bat For Your Team
Fai stared at his reflection in the bathroom mirror. Pale blue eyes studied his pallid completion and hair almost too long to ware out. His expression was one of discontent as he picked up his comb and ran it through his golden locks. He was looking surprisingly good for someone who had only gotten three hours of sleep though his grooming was merely a form of self-distraction. He was packed for school, bag in the hallway but still he stood motionless in the bathroom. He was torn between his desperate desire to run away and his obligation to face reality. He sighed feeling weak, guilty, angry and strangely light like his emotions were eroding away his essence and he might just blow away in the wind. He snatched a black hair band from the vanity and walked out. Fai left without saying a word to Ashura, not really wanting to talk to any one. He walked quickly along the streets, utterly unaware of his surroundings until he reached the cherry blossom tree. He checked his watch and noticed that he was actually a little early thanks to his speedy pace. Fai looked around for Kurogane but could see no-one coming.
"Kurogane!" he snapped loudly, un-naturally annoyed by the absence of his friend. He waited momentarily but when no answer or person came he walked on determined to get to school and to his first class. He fastened his pace again to a slow jog though still running early. His bag swung uncomfortably on his back but still Fai sped on till the school came into view.
"In a hurry are we?" Fai stopped suddenly at these words looking up, having been focusing mostly on the ground till now. Kurogane was leaning casually on the schools fence, his bag hanging loosely off his shoulder. The top few buttons of his shirt were undone and it looked like he had gotten ready in a hurry. He was wearing two earrings on his left ear today, which he usually only wore outside school as to avoid them being confiscated. He had completely foregone the standard school tie and his cuffs were undone as well. Fai also noticed Kurogane hadn't shaved this morning. He had a scruffy dishevelled quality yet Fai got the feeling every undone button and avoidance of school regulation was purposely put so.
"Feeling rebellious are we?" Fai retorted straightening up and continuing towards the school.
"Yeah, I haven't done this for a while but you know what they say gotta keep people on their toes" Kurogane said following Fai into the school passing only a handful of people. They reached their lockers before Kurogane spoke again.
"Are we going to do this now or later because mark my words Fai it will happen today. I'm sick of your attitude" Kurogane said with almost harsh tones. Fai opened his locker with a smile and then chuckled a little.
"Kurogane you're so blunt sometimes. I mean it's the morning and we only just got here – I haven't even unpacked my bag yet. I swear you have no subtlety at all…So I think the best way to have it out is if I'm as blunt as you" Fai replied unzipping his bag and putting his books in his locker.
"Good it's about time-"Kurogane began but was cut off.
"Shut up!" Kurogane jumped at this as Fai stood up. He fixed Kurogane with an intense stare.
"I'll tell you what's wrong with me when I'm damn well ready. Why do you think it's any business of yours anyway?" Fai said coolly as Kurogane tried to compose himself.
"Because I was your best friend. Because you are still pissed at me and because it's driving me crazy not to know why you hate me so much" Kurogane snarled in his face.
"I'm not pissed off I-" Fai began to shout when a few of girls and boys entered the locker bay. They looked a bit surprised but kept chattering away unaware of the tension they had just shattered. Fai's mouth remained open the last few words waiting to be spoken and they continued to glare into each other's eyes.
"Yes?" Kurogane said hiding his anticipation for the answer.
"Go on kiss him you fag" suddenly Kurogane was shoved roughly into Fai and they both bashed against the lockers as they fell. As soon as they hit the ground Kurogane shoved himself off Fai wiping the blood from the fresh cut on his cheek. One of the locks had clipped his jaw on the way down. Fai rubbed his head and they glared daggers at Fei Wong who had just arrived with two of his cronies.
"Nice pigtail Fai, dressing up for your boyfriend here?" he sneered. Kurogane leapt to his feet and grabbed Fei Wong by the lapels and slammed him against the lockers breathing hard.
"Wipe that smile of your fucking face or I will you slimy-" Kurogane roared.
"Kurogane!" He looked slowly over to see Sakura and Syaoran, a distinct look of fear on her face "You'll get in trouble! Don't!" Kurogane turned back to Fei Wong and head butted him hard then let him fall. Fei Wong shouted in pain holding his head. Fai swept past him towards the cronies rolling up his sleeves. They both took a step back but did not run away.
"Yeah – come on Fai try it!" one of them said lunging at Fai who quickly dodged and raised his knee so it connected squarely in the boy's stomach. The bully gave a little chocking noise and doubled over.
"Fai stop it!" Sakura shouted running over and standing in front of the other boy who was looking more apprehensive than ever.
"Sakura" he growled grabbing her as softly as he could "Don't' interfere" he pulled her out of the way and advanced punching the other boy. He took it well but the next punch hit him harder.
"What is going on here?!" Clow had rounded the corner, as his office was not that far from the lockers bays "Break it up!" he commanded and Fai lowered his fists.
"Witnesses" Kurogane snarled at his principal in a very unorthodox way as he pointed to the other kids in the locker bay "Me and Fai were talking and these…guys attacked us. We were simply defending ourselves" Clow's eyes seemed to turn a darker colour as he gazed at the faces of the other kids in the locker bay.
"Is this true?" he asked, his voice seeming to send a cold chill through the crowd. No one dared lie.
"Y-Yes" One boy said "It's just how Kurogane said it happened"
"Kurogane and Fai were talking and Fei Wong came up and shoved them into the locker and called them…fags" Another girl confirmed it. It was only now that Clow's icy gaze turned on Fei Wong who flinched at the sight of it.
"You three, go to the nurses and then see me in my office" he ordered Fei Wong and the two others who quickly shuffled off and away from the many glares that were watching them.
"It won't be long before the bell rings so I suggest you all get your books and start moving" Clow announced to the steadily filling locker bay then turned to Kurogane and Fai, lowering his voice "I want to see you two after school" the commanding tones in his voice told Kurogane that this order was not to be questioned.
"Yes sir" they replied grumpily in unison. Clow headed back to his office leaving the teens to their own devices.
"Why is it that in every fight we are the victims but we always get punished too?" Kurogane complained opening his locker and yanking out the books he needed.
"I know…I wish they'd just expel Fei Wong and be done with it, he's failing as it is!" Fai agreed watching the spot where Clow had disappeared.
"Eh he's somehow related to Clow and the family is putting the pressure on Clow to keep him here in till the end of this year so that he might at least pass" Kurogane explained absentmindedly wiping the blood from his cut again.
"How did you find that out?" Fai asked looking up at Kurogane.
"He told me once...when he was trying to convince me to be less reckless" Kurogane answered reluctantly as though it might have been a secret. Fai watched him for a moment and Kurogane frowned self-consciously.
"What?" he asked after a minute or two had passed. Then Fai grinned oddly. It seemed both real and yet hollow.
"I'll see you at lunchtime Black dog" Fai said grabbing Kurogane's free hand in their old secret handshake. It startled Kurogane since they hadn't done that for a few years.
"Yeah…see you then" Kurogane stuttered watching Fai walk away realizing that for the first time in weeks he and Fai had had a proper conversation. They had been comfortable with each other and therefore Fai's farewell was one that sent ominous chills down his spine. Once again Fai had managed to invade his questions however Kurogane knew there was something he hadn't quite caught in that smile. Something that made him feel strangely diffused, the anguished anticipation for Fai's answers and the anger at Fei Wong vanishing from his heart leaving curiosity alone.
"This is it Sakura, this time you're going down" Syaoran said competitively "You're not going to take any more from me" Sakura watched Syaoran carefully.
"Whatever you say Syaoran" she replied softly.
"I'll see you!" he said throwing down fifteen chips. Sakura's expression melted into an apologetic smile and she held out her cards revealing a royal flush.
"Oh NO!" Syaoran said exasperatedly "Of all the luck! You've beaten me five out of six times!"
"Now what are the odds of that?" their maths teacher asked gravely leaning over Syaoran's shoulder, ignoring the fact that what he had said was a painful pun. Syaoran blushed his mind racing as he tried to come up with the answer as the point of this maths class was to measure odds through winning and losing games. However for Syaoran it had become more about getting to know Sakura and her talent at winning streaks than mathematic equations.
"Slim to none, sir, now can we all calculate without the pop quiz questions" An exasperated voice sounded from the back of the class. Syaoran sighed with relief for being saved as the teacher turned in the voice's direction. Sakura looked over with squeamish concern. Kurogane was sitting at the back corner of the room with his feet up on the table, leaning back on his chair and seemed to be reading his maths book. Sakura knew better from that unfocused look in his eyes she had come to recognise. She knew he was thinking about Fai, going over everything that had happened over the past few weeks and was trying to figure their problems out even now. Sakura looked down at the cards in her hands remembering the short conversation Fai had had with her last night on the phone.
"I'm doing it tomorrow" he had said cryptically, voice rough and breathing shallow. He might have been crying but it was hard to tell.
"Can you ask Chi to meet me outside the library at lunchtime?"
"Sure Fai" she had replied asking no questions as she knew he wouldn't want to answer any. There was a long pause.
"Thank you Sakura-hime" then the line went dead. Sakura knew that something big was going to happen today and had not been able to concentrate on anything because of her worry. Her friends fight this morning had only added to her anxiety.
"Kurogane, remove yourself from my class" the maths teacher said with a great deal of subdued rage over the many times Kurogane had caused trouble in his class. Kurogane stood slowly a lack of enthusiasm or care in his movements as he gathered his books.
"Where do you want me to go?" He asked blankly waiting at the door.
"I don't care Kurogane, just get out" The teacher snapped coldly returning to his seat at the front of the class. Kurogane opened the door and slipped through. Sakura tried to ignore the murmurs of the girls around her muttering about hot Kurogane was today or how cool. She wondered why they couldn't see that he was suffering.
"Syaoran, can you bring me my books later?" Sakura leaned over to Syaoran and whispered.
"Yeah sure" he replied not entirely understanding what she had meant until five minutes later.
"Thanks" she said missing Syaoran's cheeks going a slightly pinker shade at her smile.
"Sir" Sakura said standing up and surprising the maths teacher and some of the class "May I go to the nurse I'm not feeling too well" the maths teacher watched her for a few minutes weighing up the chances that she might skip class.
"Very well" he said as he scribbled a quick note on a piece of paper. Being such a good girl was paying off. Sakura had never skipped out on class before but her friends were more important than one maths class. She couldn't ignore a pang of guilt as she left the classroom though; knowing she probably wouldn't return then followed after Kurogane.
"Kurogane! Kurogane!" Sakura called after him as she rounded the corner. She bumped into someone and nearly fell over. A hand shot out and caught her. It was Kurogane.
"Yeah what is princess?" he asked standing her up straight.
"Um I was wondering if you were ok, you've been acting really strange today...I haven't seen you dressed like this or acting like this in such a long time" Sakura said resisting using the phrase 'since you started really hanging out with Fai'.
"Oh this?" Kurogane said absentmindedly "I guess I must've been in a bad mood when I got ready this morning"
"What is happening today between you and Fai?...Can I help?" Sakura tried one last time fully expecting him to remain silent.
"Fai is going to tell me why he has been avoiding me and fighting me this lunchtime I think" Kurogane replied looking away and putting his hands in his pockets "I'm not sure what to think of it. But if you want to help so much you can keep Tomoyo away from the locker bay"
"Why the locker bay?"
"After the initial grabbing of lunches and books the locker bays are fairly empty and secluded. Short of leaving the school there are few places as private" Kurogane answered knowledgably. He felt a hand on his arm and looked back to Sakura who was watching him with a gentle, understanding gaze.
"I'll keep Tomoyo away" Sakura promised.
"Thanks" Kurogane said standing up a bit straighter having regained some of his composure.
"No problem" Sakura said letting go "Shall we go for a walk to get your mind off things?" Kurogane looked surprised but then finally smiled.
"Yeah alright" he agreed patting her on the head "You're a good girl Sakura-hime" Sakura giggled at this.
"What?" Kurogane asked.
"Oh nothing" Sakura said "I'm sure everything will turn out alright"
Kurogane stood leaning his back against his locker, eyes closed and arms crossed. He was twitching with anger as he waited. It was now 1:20 and the lunch break was almost finished with no sign of Fai. Kurogane had gotten to the locker bay at 12:30 on the dot and had also spent all of recess in there feeling more embarrassed by the minute. He wondered if Fai had intended to speak with him at all and he felt ridiculous standing there alone telling people he was waiting for someone. Even Kamui had approached him and asked him about his absence on the soccer field. But now he was alone again Sakura making good on her word to keep Tomoyo away. Slowly the flow of people and therefore the sound level in the locker bay grew to shouting proportions as everyone put away their lunchtime things and pulled out the books for the next classes. Still Kurogane stood motionless waiting for his best friend. Then the crowds parted for a second and Kurogane saw his golden locks glint in the light and blue eyes flash upon meeting his. Fai was there standing in the opening that lead out of the locker bay waiting too. They stood in silence till the locker bay cleared out again just watching each other. Kurogane noticed Fai looked more tired than he had that morning and he looked almost agitated. His top few buttons were undone and so was his tie handing lose around his shoulders.
"For the final time" Kurogane spoke slowly in his voice rough "What has been up with you, why haven't you been talking to me and have been avoiding me?" Fai walked over and opened his locker then began putting his things back in.
"Kurogane…this year I've been having strange feelings towards you. It started when we first got back to school and I don't know why. I've known you for a few years…maybe I felt this way all along and am now only able to class this new frustration. But when I see you, when we touch and when little moments pass by between us…my heart speeds up and my stomach twists and to be quite frank it pisses me off" Fai exclaimed his expression growing angrier though he would not meet Kurogane's gaze "I was terrified that if I told you, you would hate me or stay away from me out of discomfort. Terrified we would lose what we already had which is the best friendship I've ever seen. But I knew it couldn't go on forever so I decided I would tell you how I felt…but then…" Fai slowly stood leaning on his locker then after a few moments of silence he gave the locker a punch making Kurogane jump in spite of himself.
"You kissed me" he finally spat turning his glare on Kurogane "The bloody kiss that I can't get out of my head. At first I thought it might be ok then, having you know. But it was all a joke to you; you were just kissing me to get rid of those rumours. It didn't mean anything to you when it meant so much to me...I…I really hated you for that" Kurogane looked down an apologetic and saddened expression controlling his face though he said nothing so Fai pressed on, neither of them hearing the bell that signalised the classes starting. It was like a faint din in the distance over the roaring seriousness of what was happening between them.
"I thought maybe if I could fall in love with someone else that might mean I could still hang out with you. That's where Chi came into it" Fai continued his expression beginning to match Kurogane's "My sweet Chi, I always thought she was so cute. I'm sure I have a crush on her. I really like holding her hand and kissing her. It feels very…nice to be with her. When I kissed her in the cinema during the movie I felt so comfortable but later…all you did was brush my side with your fingers and it meant more…" Fai laughed bitterly and there was no joy in the sound.
"You brushing my side meant more to me than kissing Chi. It was torturing me caring about you so much but forcing myself to be with Chi. I thought maybe if you didn't understand why I was doing these things you might at least still take an interest in me, you might at least still care about me…that's when I got sick. I think it was greatly to do with the stress of the situation. I can't do this anymore" Fai said quickly and turned to leave when suddenly Kurogane's arms shot out leaning either side of the Fai on the lockers blocking Fai's path. With no-where to go Fai turned to Kurogane his proximity overwhelming.
"Now if you're quite finished it's my turn" Kurogane said red eyes staring into Fai's. Despite what he said he stood silently for a moment or so going over what Fai had said in his head and gathering his own thoughts together.
"First of all, you're an idiot" Kurogane said in a very matter-of-fact way "You could always and can always talk to me about things that are important to you" Fai opened his mouth to protest but Kurogane talked right over him.
"Second, how dare you screw with me like this? The last few weeks of my life have been hellish because of this constant hissy fit of yours"
"Shut up!" Fai shouted angrily blushing, utterly affronted that his deep emotional struggle was being called a hissy fit. Suddenly Kurogane allowed his hand to slip down the locker till it cupped one of Fai's cheeks his thumb running small circles on his neck.
"I couldn't stop thinking about you and worrying about you, you ass. I didn't know what was wrong. I was angry all the time and your absence was more unbearable than I thought possible. I missed you so much"
It was a good thing that Fai was leaning on his locker at this moment as his legs went weak. He couldn't believe what was coming out of Kurogane's mouth. It might have been a little clumsy and less eloquent than what Fai had said but Kurogane never talked about his feelings like this. Most of the time things like this didn't have to be spoken between them because they usually just knew what the other was thinking.
"I really cared about you" Kurogane said earnestly letting his arms bend at the elbows so he came closer "And I still do…It just took you running away for me to realize how much. Stupid huh?" Fai grabbed Kurogane by the collar and shirt and pulled him closer still.
"Not at all Black Dog" Fai replied with a simper. Kurogane's eyes slid closed and he leaned foreword closing the gap between them. Kurogane brushed Fai's bottom lip with his own and kissed him softly again and again. At first they were just light kisses but slowly Kurogane teased Fai's lips apart and deepened them. Fai whimpered the blush on his cheeks deepening Kurogane's doing the same till eventually they broke apart catching their breath and grinning.
"Well this is a surprise" Fai laughed quietly sliding his arms around Kurogane's lower back.
"You're telling me" Kurogane replied giving him another kiss, laughing when Fai shivered "Babe"
"Mmmm, I like it but Fai is better" Fai said grinning, "I love to hear you say my name"
"Ok Fai" Kurogane agreed leaning in to kiss him again but Fai's head tilted down so he kissed Fai's forehead instead.
"What's wrong?" Kurogane asked resting his arms around Fai's back "Too much?"
"No…it's just…I only just told Chi…I feel so rotten about it. Do you think we could take it slow at least around everyone for a little while" Fai's voice cracked "I think she really liked me" Kurogane pulled him into a tender hug.
"Sure we can" Kurogane replied and then to lighten the mood added "Hey come to the dance with me"
"I said I might go with Chi but she might not want to any more. If she doesn't I'll go with you" Fai said sniffing and taking some deep breaths to compose himself. Kurogane mentally kicked himself for not thinking of that and let Fai go.
"Hey we'd better get to class" Fai said grabbing his books from his locker and locking it.
"Eh. I think I'll skip English today. It'll look weird if we both come in late" Kurogane said with a naughty smirk.
"True" Fai agreed and turned to walk away. He was just about to walk out of sight when he heard Kurogane call from across the yard.
"Fai!" he shouted.
"Yeah?" Fai asked. He could not remove the smile from his lips and he couldn't care less. It was the most beautiful feeling he had experienced in years. It was like he could just take off and fly and the sound of Kurogane's voice.
"Can I walk home with you today?" He asked him voice leaping with the kind of happiness Fai only ever heard in Kurogane upon winning a game.
"Yes please!" Fai replied before turning around again and running to class cherishing what would be waiting for him at the gate.
A/N: Awwwwwww. So sweet! Man.That.Was.Surprisingly.Hard. Phew. I thought i should all let you know so you don't wait - Tsubasa High will, ironically, not be completed. I really loved writing that fic and my original plan for it was only three chapters long (the kiss ch, the fighting ch, the making up ch). It was the enormous response i got from all of you lovely people that made me streatch it out for so much longer and work really hard on making it a good read so i really wanted to thank anyone who read it and those who reviewed in particular. I made sure that the most important thing, fai and kuro's relationship, was tied up. Anything i would have put in the last chapter would have been the dance, chi and hideki getting together, sakura and syaoran getting together and a prologue...and maybe some fai and kuro making out but really you can go to any fic for that stuff. To be honest while i really loved writing it by the end it was beginning to become a chore for me, which was no-ones fault by the way, but when i write a fic it's important that the readers and me are enjoying it. If i don't like it then the writing tends to get sloppy cause i don't want to be doing it. I didn't want that to happen to that fic. If anyone has any burning questions about the characters or more specific questions about what would have happened in the last chapter i'd be happy to answer them.
Much love
Cara
p.s. The title for this chapter comes from the brilliant, fantastic, funny and one of the most favourite shows of my life Will & Grace. In the first episode of the show Grace calls Will and it looks like they're talking about doing naughty things (suggesting they're together) but they are actually talking about an ER episode they are not going to watch together because Graces boyfriend is over. Anyway Will says to Grace "Honey I don't need your man I have George Clooney" to which Grace replies "Sorry sweetie he doesn't bat for your team" and Will so wittily counters with "Well he hasn't seen me pitch". This is my little homage to the fantastically cleaver show Will and Grace which taught me to love the gay man oh so much over the many years I've watched it.