-1Angel of Sickness by Reno-san
I knew I couldn't stay away from him. He was my addiction. Reno was always great but I knew deep down that he belonged with Rude. But my addiction was the deadliest kind. Those Mako green eyes and silver hair took me places I never dreamed of going. I had experienced him in every way and he had experienced me just the same. But there was something different when I was with him. It was never fucking. It ran deeper than blood, than sleep. It was as if we were bound by the very fabric of our souls. I had been Sephiroth's first, in some aspects his only. He was regal, majestic and beautiful but I knew so candidly that he was also deadly…truly an angel. I slammed my pen on the reports and rubbed my eyes. I couldn't get him out of my mind. Despite his move to lock everyone out of his life I still wanted him, wanted to be with him, wanted to hold him and tell him everything would be okay. Something had changed in him. He was angry. Not just the angst kind either. This was a burning fire of absolute hate and rage but one that burned cold as ice. Despite his rage I still loved him. I still remember the angel that first laid in my arms in the Chocobo barn. I still remember taking care of him and loving him. I knew it was truly a gift despite the embodiment of wrath he had become. Someone with his power should never possess the anger that he held inside. I knew Sephiroth could summon powerful beings and use energy to obey his will….he always could. That someday may be a fatal combination. I could hear Reno off laughing somewhere and Elena wandering around the halls looking for something. Goddamn it, Sephiroth. Where are you? I had not seen him for days. I had to get a fix and soon. I laughed out loud to myself, he was truly my drug. I picked up the phone and dialed out.
"Shinra Tower, this is Melea." I was so happy to hear from her. Melea and I lived near each other in Wutai. Our affinity for each other gave me some special liberties. I greeted her in Wutan. "Tseng! I am so happy to hear from you." She quickly returned our native greeting.
"I need a favor." My words were hesitant although I am not sure why. Everyone knew that Sephiroth and I had a "special relation" to each other.
She moaned softly. "What did Reno do now?"
A smile tugged at my lips. "No, not Reno. I wanted to ask about Sephiroth. I haven't seen him for a few days."
"Hmm…" She seemed lost in the clicking of a keyboard. "Well I knew he seemed to be under the weather and he hasn't left his room in two days.."
Damn it, something was up. "I'll be over there soon."
Something cursed me in my mind as I swerved in and out of traffic. I knew Sephiroth liked his privacy but it was also odd that he wasn't out and pacing the halls as he usually did. Rain pounded down on my windshield and I swore that the night could not get any more black. Only the luminescence of headlights dared to offer it light. A lot like him, no one dared to enter into his darkness except for me. Not to leave his room for two days? Not bloody likely. Well if I end up with a black eye tonight I will have no one to blame but myself. Sephiroth was fierce about his independence and made it known on many occasions that he needed no one but himself. Still something bothered me. I locked my car quickly behind me, feeling grateful that the keys were in my hand. I had learned not to leave them in the car after a certain red-headed Turk decided to pull a stunt with my car. I rushed through the pelting water. Furthermore I had noticed that advance notice of a person dropping in on him improved his mood dramatically. People nodded respectfully as I made my way through the building. It took me forever to reach the top floor of the Shinra Tower. I kept concentrating on Sephiroth. I had learned throughout the years if I did this that he would have an uncanny knowledge that I was coming. When I had finally endured the unending ride to the 68th floor I was silently thankful. Sephiroth had wanted the top floor but I doubt until the President's death and hence evacuation of his penthouse that was going to happen. Rufus had the 69th floor which had become an ongoing joke with all of us. It was no big secret that Rufus got used regularly by both Turk, Shinra and other officials as well. Not to mention the poor boy also had been caught unawares by Sephiroth more than once.
A puff of air granted me entry into his area. He always kept it dark, only the soft flicker of dim fluorescents lit the area. It always reminded me of the half light of a television set. Not to mention everything he had was black. I made my way through his den, everything was in impeccable order…I knew he would have no less. Study, Hallway, and the empty room. Only a single chair was in this room. No furnishings or color. Just a black room that looked out to the Midgar lights. I never got the point of this room. He had to know I was here. I had entered into his territory. I finally came upon his bedroom door. Where the hell was he? A sound caught me off guard. A moan? A cry? I stopped and listened at his door. There was that same strangled noise again. I hesitantly lifted my hand. I had on more than one occasion had him tear into me about his need for privacy. "Sephiroth?" I called as I gently rapped my knuckles on the door. Nothing. I reached for the knob and entered into his room. His bed came into view and I could see him laying on the comforter. He seemed to be panting. What the hell has happened? "Sephiroth?" I quickly went to his side and turned on his lamp. I felt myself sit on his bed as I took in the scene before me. He was soaked in sweat and struggling to breathe. His eyes were low and fever dimmed. I ran to his bathroom and dampened a washcloth. On my race back to the bedroom I grabbed a bowl and filled it with water. I stopped again and reached into his fridge grabbing a bottle of water. I darted back down the hallways and into his room. I gently swept his hair back from his face. "Sephiroth?" His forehead was burning hot. I put the cool towel on his face eliciting a moan. "Shh…you're okay." He began to struggle. "Easy now." Sephiroth settled in an uneasy daze as I cooled his face. I could hear the jagged rasping of his breath. "Shh." I softly consoled him as my mind panicked as what to do. I gently ran a hand over his chest, traveling up to his face. He coughed violently as his body racked. "Relax, I'm going to call the infirmary."
"No!" His voice was silent, only a rasping formed the word. I didn't have to ask. I knew why he didn't want to go. Hojo would be there. Those green pools begged me to listen. He moaned softly trying to catch his breath. I wet the washcloth in the water and began to cool his face. What the hell was I going to do? I had never seen Sephiroth sick before.
As far as I knew he was extremely immune to most illnesses. It dawned on me that I had a friend after all who may have an answer. Someone who was not only a nurse but had worked with Professor Gast on SOLDIER. Flipping open my PHS, I took a moment to reassure Sephiroth. He was terrified. I gently stroked his hair. "Shh, you're going to be fine." He could sense my uncertainty. I pressed the speed dial option. Sephiroth was getting hotter and had begun to shiver. I quickly pulled his blankets up over him.
"Shinra Tower, this is Melea." The sweetest sound I had heard all day.
"It's me, I need you." She knew I wouldn't be asking if I didn't mean it.
"Where are you?" Her voice reflected my anxiety.
"Sixty eighth floor. Door's open." Sephiroth moaned, still struggling with his breath.
I could hear her shoes running down the hall. "What happened?"
"He's sick, deathly sick."
There was a long pause. "Sephiroth is sick?" I could pick up on the fear in her voice.
"Yeah, flu or something else respiratory." He began trying to get the blankets off as his fever began setting in. "Easy." I spoke softly to him.
"Damn it, I told him this would happen." Anger flashed in her voice.
"Who?" Now this was getting interesting. I began to cool Sephiroth's face as the fever was becoming worse.
"Gast and Hojo." She snapped. "But they would never listen to me!" I felt clueless. "I'm almost there." I turned and watched her enter into the room. She immediately came to Sephiroth's side. She put her hand over his eyes. "Shhh…shhh. " Her eyes looked up at me. "Call the medics…now."
I flipped open the PHS again and speed dialed the medic team. "Location?" A robotic voice asked.
"Sixty eighth floor, Sephiroth Yamamura." I was watching her comfort him. It hurt me to see him like this. She looked up surprised as I knew his last name which had become all but forgotten.
"Responding, stand by." My call was successful. I returned to my lover. Could I even call him that? He had been avoiding me. I pushed all of my thoughts aside as I knelt down on the bed. I gently stroked his plastered hair off on his face and neck.
"They're coming." I said absently. Sephiroth began to struggle again. She put her hand over his eyes. "Talk to me, what did you mean?"
I looked down and noticed that Sephiroth was becoming still from her touches. "When Gast and Hojo created SOLDIER I warned them about biological agents, viruses, especially influenza because it mutates so easily. They wanted to make the genetic engineering so that the SOLDIERS were immune. But because influenza mutates so easily it was the one weakness of those created. " I silently thanked whomever was listening to me that Sephiroth was too sick or too tired to be listening. "So when a SOLDEIR gets sick they have no immunity as they have never fought anything else off . Not to mention they're probably terrified because they have never experienced sickness before. So suddenly they are put into a weakened state and are panicking because they don't know what is happening to them which leads to a downward spiral of overall health." She gently took the cloth and folded it over his forehead. I looked over my love, the scene breaking my heart. I could hear the medics scrambling into the area. "So when one of them gets sick, we need to take special care of them as they don't have the immunity even a child has." The thought terrified me. Sephiroth was hanging in the balance as we were working to cure him of his sickness. The medics rushed the room. "He has severe dehydration, possible pneumonia, high fever." She addressed the medics in an ordering tone.
"Ma'am, the professor has noted that he wishes to have Sephiroth moved to his laboratory should anything happen to him." The kid was a young blonde, something about him reminded me of Cloud.
"He won't be going anywhere, Sephiroth will be recovering in his quarters." Her tone was recalcitrant. The young medic stepped away and began unloading his bag without another word. The other two began circling Sephiroth and checking him. We both moved out of the way. I stayed close just in case something would happen. Well I guess her orders solved the problem of Hojo. The young medic began to draw up serum into a syringe. I reached down to stroke Sephiroth's face. If he had enough strength left in him that kid would regret it. Picking up the pale hand, the young man began injecting the back for an IV. A flash caught me and I found myself holding Sephiroth's leg at bay a mere inch from the boy's startled face. Despite his weakened state he still hated injections. Lucky for all of us his strength was all but gone. His head dropped back with the last of his stamina being used up. Sephiroth watched dejectedly as the medic shakily inserted an IV. The young man was obviously terrified. I swear a look of relief crossed his features as he drew yet another serum into a syringe and pumped it into the IV. I watched Sephiroth's body completely relax within moments and those green pools cloud over.
"He is severely dehydrated and also his fever is burning out of control still. I'll continue to try and stabilize him." The medic remarked as his companions worked quickly around my lover. I watched Sephiroth slowly open his groggy eyes. The team were placing some sort of metallic foil blanket over him.
Tseng?
"I'm right here."
Tseng, don't let him take me, please!
"Relax." I gently took his hand into mine. "I'm here, nothing is going to happen to you." I looked up just in time for one of the other medics to begin drawing up blood.
I hurt.
"Damn, he's dehydrated." The older medic commented.
I love you and I'm here. Just relax, we need to get you well.
"Do you have a prognosis yet?" Melea asked, her voice nothing but professional.
I'm scared. I could sense his fear and could hear his heart racing on the monitor.
"Definitely influenza if not pneumonia. We'll know more after the blood test."
I am too. Do you remember what I used to tell you when I rocked you to sleep?
That so long as I was in your arms, nothing in the world would harm me.
"What can we do?" Melea studied the paramedic.
That's right. When they get done taking care of you, that's where you'll be.
"Keep him warm and calm, away from any drafts." The older man looked up and quipped, "Seems to have a bad temper."
I don't deserve you.
You always get exactly what you deserve.
I looked up regarding the paramedic. "You have no idea." I answered the older man.
I'm still scared, I can't breathe.
Try to sleep for me. You will be able to soon. Just relax. I watched the medics checking the IV and pulse monitor. Another one began getting an oxygen mask ready. I knew that Sephiroth was insecure about anyone being near his face. I held out my hand to take it. Better he tries to lash out at me than the kid again. I gently placed it over his face, keeping eye contact with him. Breathe as deep as you can.
I don't like it. Despite his protest I gently lifted his head and secured the mask. A smile tugged at my lips. If he knew that I was amused by him it would only piss him off.
I don't care if you don't like it, you're going to wear it. Those green eyes glared weakly at me.
"Tseng, are you okay?" I snapped out of my conversation with Sephiroth.
"Yeah, just checking in with him. Seeing how he's doing." I doubted anyone knew about our ability to talk to each other. I doubted even more that they would understand it.
Tseng, it hurts.
I know, I'm here.
I looked at one of the medics. "What medications do you have for him?"
"Well there is this one." He set out a vial. "An antibiotic." He produced three more vials. "A painkiller, sedative, and a steroid." He indicated each one. "The directions are on them."
"Would you mind showing me?" I wanted to get Sephiroth out of pain as soon as possible.
I watched the medic draw up each vial and inject it into the IV.
Tseng, I feel…strange. What's happening to me?!
It seemed like hours had passed but I knew it had been mere minutes. The medics had packed away the last of their things and were retreating. "Thank you for coming." Melea graciously bowed to the staff as they took their leave.
Relax, you're sick. I know that you must be terrified and I can imagine if you've never experienced it before that it's unsettling. Now you're just going to go to sleep. I watched him begin to draw easier breaths. The medication and the oxygen seeming to ease his labored breathing.
"I'm glad I came." I mumbled softly.
"He may have died if you didn't." My friend put her hand on my shoulder. "Now we just have to worry about keeping Hojo busy until he gets better."
Don't leave me. I'm so tired I can't open my eyes. I need to watch out for him.
"What can we do?" I knew that Hojo would be a problem as soon as he realized that Sephiroth was AWOL.
"Let me worry about him, I'll only need your help if something goes wrong." She threw her head in the direction of the slime ball's lab.
Go to sleep and I'll be watching over you When you open your eyes, you'll see that I was with you all along.
"I'm going to stay here with him." I ran a hand through his thick mane, studying his sleeping form.
I love you.
The voice startled me as I thought he was unconscious. I haven't heard you say that in a long time. I will always love you too.
"I'll leave you two then. Call if you need anything." She began to back out of the room. I graciously bowed to her. I was going to owe this woman a huge favor. I hoped that I could find a way to repay my debt to her. She had saved the person I love and would protect him until he was able to take care of himself.
Sephiroth had always been beautiful to me. The young angel had grown into a majestic man. His metallic hair had paled slightly into beautiful moonlight silver. Those eyes. Those eyes had held in in rapture for over 10 years now. It seems like such a long time but in love, it becomes merely a whisper. Something written upon the silk of a dream and burned into your very flesh. Majestic was the only word I could think of to describe him. The truest sense of an angel, both beautiful and deadly. I knew it was a fatal attraction and I drank of it with abandon. Suddenly my image of him being immortal…indestructible…was shattered. I still couldn't believe it as I sat down on his bed. His hair was beginning to get plastered to his face as a fever was coming on. His breathing marked by shallow movement among the dark blankets. I reached out to him and gently soothed his sleeping form. My fingers ran through his hair…10 years. His eyes opened, a look of curiosity in them. Maybe he had heard my thoughts, wouldn't be the first time…nor the last. He winced, his breath catching. I hushed him as he cringed. He was still hurting and as much as I would love to alleviate his pain, only so much could be done. I took his hand into mine, those long pale fingers instead curling around my hand. I heard his breath catch again. A new gaggle of drugs had been brought for him to take. I poured the thick liquid into the measuring cup and gently removed the oxygen mask. I rested his head on my arm and brought the cup to his lips. He hated the concoction and tried to shy away as I forced him to drink it. I poured out the pills from each bottle and fed them to him. He was glaring at me as I lifted his head to drink a glass of cool water. I knew that he hated not only his weakness but taking all of the drugs as well. I added a syringe of medicine to his oxygen mask and placed it again on his face. I stroked his hair until the first effects of the medication was upon him. His eyes blinked sleepily. The medication was something I had not experienced before. Something that was inhaled to ease his breathing. He closed his eyes and rested. I stroked his hair absently. I still loved him with all of my being despite him pushing everyone away. I laid down and wrapped an arm around his sleeping form.
I awoke the next day to see Sephiroth sleepily looking around the room. The drugs seemed to make him lethargic and passive which worked out as I knew how stubborn he could be. I rose to make us breakfast. I sighed as I explored his refrigerator. He despised cooking and it showed. I called in an order of groceries from the keypad of my PHS. I sat on his bed and caressed him as I pressed the keys. Eggs, milk, butter. How could you exist without these things? The automated voice confirmed my order. I wandered back out to his kitchen. No wonder it always in great order, it was never used. I sighed to myself as I opened a cupboard and located a can of soup. At least he would have something in his stomach until the groceries arrived. I called Reno from the PHS.
"Sup?" He said absently, not bothering to check the number.
"Is that a way to talk to me?" I smiled, I knew he couldn't tell that I was not upset.
"Oh, hi boss!" I could hear him hurriedly take his feet off of his desk. "What's going on?"
"I'll be away for a few days, maybe a week. I want you to keep an eye on everything for me." I was already dreading the phone call from Elena. She would be furious.
"Everything okay, though?" Reno could sense something was amiss.
"Sephiroth's not doing well and I'm taking care of him for a few days." Reno, please don't catch the lie.
"He's not okay, is he?" I could hear the fear rising in his voice.
"He's sick, Reno." I prayed he wouldn't pry. "He'll be fine, he just needs a little help." I knew that the two were casual lovers outside of our relationship. I had no idea whether or not Rude knew about it.
"Well will you call me if you need anything?" This was his annoyance mark. He was annoyed that I had lied to him and that I was hesitant with details.
"You know that I will." I stroked Sephiroth's face as I felt him begin to stir.
"All right then, later." He waited for me, I could tell he was listening to the background and seeing if he could pick up any additional details. Gods, I had trained him too well.
"Goodbye, Reno." I hung up the phone and looked into the angel's face.
He weakly threw his head. I want this off of me, Tseng. I knew he hated the mask but it was helping him to breathe.
"You can have it off for a few minutes but if you have problems it's going back on." I gently removed the mask taking note of the relieved look on his face. He laid there breathing, resting. He closed his eyes and grit his teeth. A soft moan escaped from him. He was late on his medication and had begun to hurt. I quickly fed him the plethora of drugs in distaste. I would have to begin assessing each one and find him a natural remedy. I trusted natural means of health much more than this chemical garbage. I sat with him comforting him until he was dosing. Once I was certain he was out I slipped the mask back over his face. I might as well do it now and save myself a fight later. Once I was satisfied with his condition I returned to the kitchen. I heated the soup and began to explore his apartment. He seemed obsessed with reading about an archeological dig in which an alien being was discovered. I remember reading about the incident in the papers but it was long ago when I was young. I had just become a Turk at that point. Valentine was still with us. A heavy sigh escaped me, times change I suppose. Change is truly the only thing for certain. I returned to my lover with the food and gently brushed his hair back, stirring him awake. I held out a spoonful of food to him. He shook his head. Not hungry. He answered in my mind.
"Come on and just try a little for me, please?" He closed his eyes in resignation as I removed the mask again. For not being hungry, he eventually ate the entire bowl and wanted more. "I have more on the way." I reassured him as my hands caressed his face. It had been so long.
His eyes caught mine. I love you.
"I love you too." Gods it felt so good to hear him say that. I offered Sephiroth a drink. His appetite was voracious which made me feel more confident about his recovery. He still couldn't fend for himself. This wasn't the first time I had taken care of him won't be the last.
And as such, does not mean I have to like it, either. And there was the biting sarcasm, I knew that he would be fine.
Sephiroth grew stronger each and every day. He still was unable to take care of himself but was recovering. My fear of seeing him so vulnerable was passing each day as he healed. One evening I had taken Sephiroth in my arms and had begun to fall asleep. A moan escaped me as I felt soft, wet kisses under my throat. I opened my eyes to see Sephiroth wrapping himself around my body. He unbuttoned my pants as he trailed down my stomach. His sharp teeth dangerously nipping at me. He was already out of his clothing by the time mine had been discarded. Only the IV was marring his physique. I roughly ran my hands up his sides feeling muscle and bone straining underneath my touch. A moan escaped me as I felt his cock near my opening. I could feel him biting my neck as he entered me, the two sensations driving me mad. Slamming onto him made him cry out as we began our rhythm. Soon I was bucking up to meet his thrusts lost in my own voice. I begged him in sweet Wutan's to fuck me all night. I thought my cock was going to explode as he licked my ear and whispered his positive response in my native tongue. Time was endless as we writhed together in sweet ecstasy. I tensed too tight after awhile and his cries became guttural. I was loving every moment of our beautiful ascent into lust. The pace changed as he lunged at me, slamming his huge cock deep into me. I felt the end was in sight as I threw my head back and cried out. My passion was already kissed onto his flesh in ten red trails marring that perfect alabaster skin. He came first taking me with him to sweet darkness. My seed sprayed over his hand as he finished me off. Our tongues met for one final time. I awoke sometime later. It didn't even take me a moment to realize how perfect life was. I was lying in Sephiroth's bed with his naked form held safely in the hollow of my body. My sickness has been loneliness and he healed me of it. His sickness had been illness and I had healed him. Perhaps together we could heal anything that would ever divide us. Perhaps he would always be my angel, ready to help me and watching over me no matter where our paths led.