Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or the characters therein. They belong to the genius J.K.Rowling and I am not making any money off of this, nor do I want to.

A/N: The ONLY story I will write when she is still in school. And she's actually an apprentice at the moment. That's as low as I go.

Professor Severus Snape was, as always, vexed. In front of him stood that little know-it-all of a girl, Granger. She had just handed him the essay that he had given not five minutes prior. It was five rolls of parchment as he had commanded, and every word was so small he would probably need a magnifying glass to read it. How she had managed to have it done so quickly he would never know. She didn't cheat, that he knew for certain. She was too hell-bent on trying to prove her magic abilities were equal to that of a pureblood.

He pinched the bridge of his nose as she waited patiently for him to say something.

"Miss Granger, do you insist on making your writing so small that an ant can't even read it?" he snarled.

The girl's hopeful face dulled slightly and she shifted her weight to the other foot. She was wearing muggle clothing. He had been too busy to notice.

"20 points from Gryffindor for not turning in your assignment next class as per directed. And another 20 for not wearing the appropriate school attire that all students must wear when not on their nights and weekends."

"But Professor, I can just take the essay back and give it to you then. I just didn't want to lose it is all." She stammered.

Snape gripped the table and stood, looking down his nose at her.

"Out of my sight and do expect a failing grade since I can't even read it."

The Granger girl looked shocked for a moment, and then her face began to turn red. It wasn't because she was embarrassed, it was because she was now just as vexed as Snape was. She lifted her wand, her narrowed eyes not leaving his and swished it. The parchment shook in his hand and then grew several more feet. When he looked down at it, the words were large enough for him to see. Upon a not-so-closer inspection, one word took the entire width of the parchment itself.

"Can you read it now or shall I go bigger?" She whispered, rage dripping from every syllable. For a moment Severus had to admit that he, the big spying bat of the dungeons and who isn't afraid of anything cringed inside at her tone. It was the same one, feminized of course, that he used on the students. He could now see why everyone feared him, though he wasn't complaining.

"20 points from Gryffindor Miss Granger for being a smart-ass."

She placed her hands on either side of his desk and leaned in close to him, her face as red as Weasley's hair now.

"20 points from Slytherin for being such a son of a bitch!"

"20 points from Gryffindor for filthy language and back-talking a teacher!"

"20 points from Slytherin for being such a greasy bat!"

"I believe that merits a detention at 7:00 Miss Granger. With Filch." Snape whispered, his eyes glittering.

Granger seemed to calm a bit before slinging her bag over her shoulder.

"Fine, but keep in mind that while I'm serving a detention you get to change Janis' diapers and attempt to breastfeed him."

Severus closed his eyes and grunted. Damn it all! And damn Dumbledore for that evil marriage law!

"Fine. You win. No detention."

"That's what I thought. I'm going to go get him from Minerva. And if I hear you call me by my maiden name again instead of yours I'll be forced to take it back."

"You wouldn't dare…"

She leaned forward and gave him a kiss before strutting out the door.

Severus watched his wife and apprentice leave with a slightly longing gaze.

"I have got to learn not to give in to her. It's humiliating."