Disclaimer: Star Trek Voyager is property of Paramount Pictures and all respective cast, crew, and employees. I am not making a profit off this. This is simply for fanfiction enjoyment.
Summary: An away mission goes terribly wrong for Harry Kim and Tom Paris. One is badly injured and the other's past comes back to haunt him. One will be forever changed and the other may not survive.
Rating: PG-13
Timeline: Takes place after the episode Nothing Human and before Thirty Days.
Poisoning
"Switch to impulse power, and keep scanning using long-range sensors," Captain Kathryn Janeway ordered. Voyager's rapid pace greatly slowed, the ship coming out of warp.
Harry Kim carefully studied the readings on his console, looking carefully for any signs of the chemical they were looking for. For the past week, Voyager had been running low on dilithium, a chemical used to fuel the warp core. If they didn't find dilithium in the next two weeks, Voyager would be dead in space.
Harry listened for any response on his console, looked for any signs of a planet that could hold dilithium… nothing. Suddenly, the ensign had an idea. He tapped at his console, this time, searching for a different chemical. His console beeped in response.
"Captain, I think I've found something."
Janeway looked in his direction.
"There's a high concentration of lithium oxide five light years to starboard off our current position."
"But we're looking for dilithium."
"Lithium oxide could be an indication of a planet that contains dilithium," Harry explained, "but we can't be sure unless we move closer."
The captain thought for a moment. If they set a course, it would take them just a few days off course for home, but deplete a week's worth of fuel, cutting the fuel they had left in half.
"Set a course," she said, "warp 5."
A few days later, Harry went to his station on the Bridge. He was getting used to the crutches by now and his speed was getting faster. However, this was no comfort to the ensign.
He settled into his station, setting his crutches aside. Immediately, he began using Voyager's long-range scanners. He knew they wouldn't be within range for another hour, but that didn't stop him from checking.
When they were within range, Harry tapped rapidly at his console, scanning every detail of the planet nearby.
Tom Paris, stationed at the helm, eased Voyager in closer.
Suddenly, the ship rocked heavily to the side, forcing everyone to grab onto their stations to stay in their seats. Harry tried to hold on, but his hands were sweaty from a mixture of nervousness and excitement. He toppled from his tall chair, landing hard on his right shoulder.
"Sorry," Tom said, "this environment has denser ion concentration. Adjusting inertial stabilizers to compensate."
Voyager became steady once again.
"Harry," Chakotay noticed Harry lying on the floor wincing. The first officer made his way to the ensign, but he was already moving to get back up. Harry grabbed his crutches and moved as quickly as he could back to a standing position, putting his weight on the crutches.
"I'm fine," he insisted.
"Are you sure?" Janeway asked.
"Yeah," Harry replied, moving his right arm to show he wasn't injured, "I'm fine."
Harry returned to his station and resumed his work, continuing the scans. His lips curled into a satisfied smile as he found the chemical he was looking for.
"Sensors have picked up large quantities of dilithium on the planet's surface,"
he reported, "there's plenty of it; enough to fill Voyager's tanks and several canisters of reserves."
"Excellent work, Mr. Kim," the captain replied.
Lieutenant Commander Tuvok studied the readouts at his station.
"The planet is not claimed by any alien species that we have encountered," the Vulcan explained, "However, it is also an inhospitable planet with temperatures exceeding five hundred fifty degrees Celsius. The dilithium is under the surface where temperatures are much cooler.
"It would be inadvisable to beam down to the surface, even with environmental suits."
Harry let out a slow breath. So close… yet so far.
"Captain," he said after a moment of thought, "we could take the Delta Flyer close to the surface and use phasers to break through. We can then beam the dilithium into containers.
"I can configure the Flyer's shields to withstand the ion atmosphere. The ion atmosphere might disrupt communications, but I don't see any other way we can mine the dilithium."
The captain paused.
"Do it. Mr. Paris and Mr. Kim, take the Flyer in," she said after some thought.
Ensign Kim eagerly jumped out of his chair. He had not been on an away mission since his injury. Since he was injured, he had watched over and over again, other senior officers take his place on away missions. This time, however, would be different. There was no need to beam to the surface and thus, no need to walk.
He leaned on his crutches, and his right shoulder pained his protest. The pain from his fall had started off dull and it seemed to be getting worse. But he ignored it. Nothing was going to stop him from going on this mission.
"Mr. Paris?" the captain asked.
The lieutenant was at his station, staring distantly at the viewscreen. His hands had started to shake ever so slightly since the captain ordered his friend and him to the Delta Flyer.
"Yes, captain," Tom snapped out of his thoughts. He moved to the turbolift.
After Harry configured the Flyer's shields, Tom eased the sophisticated shuttlecraft out of Voyager's docking port and into space. As soon as the shuttlecraft flew several kilometers away from Voyager, the sensors beeped.
"There's an ion storm coming our way," Harry said, reading his console.
"Why didn't our sensors detect it?" the captain asked. Lieutenant Commander Tuvok had just reported the ion storm to her.
"It appeared with no warning," Tuvok explained, "this appears to be a phenomenon localized to this location. The ion concentration increased exponentially in two point three seconds."
"Communications?"
The Vulcan shook his head.
"Can we beam them back?"
"Negative, the higher concentration of ion is disrupting transporters."
He tapped a series of commands into his station, brining up a schematic of the storm.
"There's a break in the storm," Harry reported reading the sensors of the Delta Flyer, "This storm seems to come in waves. The next break is twenty minutes away. Luckily, the storm is below us. We could take the Flyer in during the calm. We'll have fifteen minutes to take her in. Once we get close to the surface, we'll be below the ion wave. We'll wait for the next break to take the Flyer back up.
"The breaks don't seem to occur at regular intervals. We'll have a half hour before the next break. From there, we'll only have ten minutes to take the Flyer back up before the next wave hits."
"… Tom?"
Harry's friend had been silent since they boarded the Flyer.
"Tom? Are you alright?"
Harry started to move towards his crutches to get to his friend, but finally, Tom spoke.
"W-we can't," he stammered, still staring straight ahead, "we can't take the Flyer in. It's too dangerous."
Harry stared at his friend in shock. He had never known him to shy away from danger, especially if it involved testing his piloting skills.
"… If we take her in during breaks, we should be fine."
"No," Tom insisted, "we have to get back to Voyager. The storm waves are too unpredictable."
"This is the only way we can get the dilithium," Harry argued, not believing he was trying to convince his friend to pilot the Delta Flyer.
Tom continued to stare ahead. Images and memories started to flash though his mind. Junior Ensign Hayes lying on the floor of the shuttlecraft of his first mission, deep burns over his entire body from the warp core breach. Him trying to wake Junior Ensign Rictor after her head slammed into a wall as the shuttle spun out of control. The cold sweat he felt as he faced a court martial for his reckless acts on his first mission… Harry saying over his combadge that he thought he heard something as the two investigated the cave, just before he was attacked…
"Tom?"
Harry's voice jolted Tom from his thoughts.
"Are you sure you're alright?"
"Yeah," Tom replied, hoping he sounded more confident than he actually was. He pressed at his console.
"I-It's just too dangerous, that's all. We have to go back."
"Why? It'll be fine, we just have to make it though between the storm waves."
"No, it-it's not good."
Tom was already instructing the Delta Flyer to set a course back for Voyager.
"What're you talking about? We can't go back now. We might not have another chance. I don't see another break in the storm besides the two that will allow us to go down to the surface and back up again. With your piloting and my enhancements to the shields, everything will be fine."
"No, everything won't be fine," Tom said, raising his voice. He stopped instructing the Flyer and turned back towards his friend, "because I am not going to be responsible for killing another person."
Harry stared back at his friend, trying to think what on Earth his friend could be talking about. It didn't take him long to remember. The incident at Caldik Prime that cost three Starfleet officers' lives was infamous throughout Starfleet.
"That's not going to happen again," Harry said.
"You don't know that," Tom insisted, "I'm already responsible for your injuries; I'm not going to be responsible for killing you… I nearly did that already!"
Tom lowered his head. He didn't mean to confess this way.
"What're you talking about?" Harry said, "… You mean, you blame yourself for what happened to me on the Apex planet? How are you responsible?"
"Y-You warned me that something wasn't right," Tom argued, his eyes downcast, "but I didn't listen to you; and now you've paid the price."
Tom looked away before continuing.
"Because of me, you won't ever be able to walk again."
Tom's words caught Harry off guard and resounded in his mind. His words echoed like your own voice does in an empty cavern, emphasizing just how alone you are.
"Yeah, w-well…" Harry stammered, starting to fight back tears, "walking is overrated anyway."
Hearing his friend say those words to him, it was as if all hope had been sealed away for eternity. Though the possibility of him not walking was always in the back of Harry's mind, he constantly dismissed it, hoping that if he held on, just a little longer, endured just one more physical therapy session, he'd make some progress; but neither were true. His friend vocalizing reality had finally made him face the truth. He'd never be able to walk again.
Harry's console beeped. He read the display, thankful for the interruption.
"The break in the ion storm is approaching," he announced.
"We can't go in," Tom said. He froze at his station, watching the ion storm through the front windows of the Delta Flyer.
"Tom, hurry," Harry said, "the break in the storm won't last long. We have to go in there, now."
"No, I can't," Tom, the skilled pilot, started to reverse the Flyer away from the ion storm and head back towards Voyager; images of the lives he cost and the injuries to his best friend swam through his mind.
Harry looked from Tom to the ion storm. This might be their only chance to mine for dilithium. But there was an even more important reason to head towards the planet's surface.
Tom concentrated on his console. He just had to take it nice and steady towards Voyager. Then, they'd both be fine. Suddenly, the controls buzzed in denial. He tapped harder, but the console buzzed again in protest.
"What the-?"
He was locked out of the controls. Tom whipped his head behind him.
"Harry, what're you doing? I can't do this!"
"You have to," Harry said, looking straight into his friend's eyes. He had locked Tom out of helm control and was taking the Delta Flyer himself into the calm of the storm. He worked as quickly as he could, though his right arm's movements were restricted by the pain his shoulder.
As soon as the Flyer entered the calm of the storm, it rocked and bucked; even the calm of the storm wasn't completely calm. Harry released the Flyer's helm control and transferred them back to Tom.
For a few seconds, Tom stared at the familiar controls as if he had never seen them before. For several heart-pounding seconds, Harry watched as the next wave of the ion storm closed in on them.
"Tom, now would be a really good time to pilot the Flyer," Harry said urgently as the storm came within a hundred kilometers.
A cold sweat beaded on Tom's forehead, but he fumbled for the controls anyway. Looking to his right, he flipped some switches on the console he modified to mimic Captain Proton's ship, taking comfort in the familiarity of the controls. He concentrated on taking it step-by-step and slowly, the pilot in him took over. In seconds, he took the controls like a natural, moving the agile shuttlecraft through the break. The Flyer maneuvered quickly and gracefully towards the surface, waving and flowing with the break in the storm.
Tom let out a slow sigh of relief as he eased the Flyer into position over the surface of the planet. He leaned back in his chair, closed his eyes, and took several slow breaths.
"You okay?" Harry asked.
"Yeah," Tom said, smiling for the first time in a long while, "… I'm just fine."
Harry let his friend rest while he worked at the controls. The ensign modified transporters and diverted all available power to them to compensate for the ion concentration interference.
A precise phaser shot out of the Delta Flyer's bow, which cut through the planet's surface, easily slicing through the dense rock.
"Transporting the dilithium," Harry said as he glided his finger on his console. Behind him, dilithium was transported into containers specially designed to house the volatile substance. A few more transports were all that were needed.
"Hey Harry?" Tom said, turning to face his friend.
Harry looked up from his console.
"I-I'm sorry," Tom said. He looked downward, taking several moments to gather himself before looking back up, "I'm sorry for not listening to you. I… I'm sorry for your not being able to walk. I'm responsible for all this. I-wish-I-could-take-it-all-back-"
"Don't blame yourself," Harry interrupted, not wanting his friend to say anything further, "I don't blame you and you shouldn't either."
"But if it weren't for me you'd be able to walk-"
"Any number of things could've happened on that planet," Harry countered, "to you or me. Or, nothing could've happened. That's the risk we take when we go on away missions. Neither one of us could've foreseen what happened."
"But you knew something was wrong on that planet, and I didn't listen to you."
"I'm not right all the time," Harry countered, "no one is. The point is, is if either of us knew this would happen, we never would've landed on the Apex planet.
"You want to know why I became your friend?" Harry continued, "Everyone warned me about you, saying 'he's responsible for the incident at Caldik Prime. I'd stay away from him if I were you.
"But I didn't see someone who was responsible for three deaths. I saw someone who was sorry for a terrible mistake he made. I saw someone who was being punished over and over again for a mistake he made years ago that I'm sure is never far from his mind.
"It's not right for people to punish you for a mistake that you know the consequences of, better than anyone else. Don't add to that by torturing yourself with what if's. Tom, please… don't blame yourself."
Tom sighed heavily and began to nod.
Suddenly, Tom's console beeped. He let out a sigh and swiveled back around in his chair.
"There's the other break," Tom said, looking at the Flyer's sensor readouts on a front panel, "coming in fast in three minutes."
Harry glanced upward, then did a double-take. His fingers danced of his console as he checked to make sure what he was seeing was true. It was. It seemed the storm was more variable than either of them had anticipated. What had originally been a wide gap for the Flyer to return to Voyager, had narrowed to just one kilometer. The narrow break had several sharp waves. The Delta Flyer would have to make exact movements to avoid the storms on both sides. The next ion storm wave was coming in fast; and the concentration of ions three times higher than the first wave. It would be like threading a needle though an electrical field.
"That is too narrow," Harry said breathlessly, "we'll never make it."
But there was no other break in the storm for another three hours, as far as Delta Flyer's long-range sensors could see. The next break might be in three and a half hours, maybe three days. Maybe never.
"We have to," Tom replied. The two exchanged glances; both even managed a slight smile.
Tom adjusted himself in his seat, mentally preparing for the task ahead.
"Harry, I'm going to need you to adjust power to the plasma injectors, shields, and internal stabilizers; all three need as much power as we can manage."
"Sure."
He grabbed his crutches and a toolkit and hobbled down the Flyer. His shoulder now hurt even more, stinging every time he moved, but he grit his teeth and continued.
When he reached the Jeffries tube, Harry slowly lowered himself to the floor, putting the toolkit in the Jeffries tube. He set aside his crutches, and crawled in. It was then when his shoulder had had enough. Sharp, stabbing pain assaulted it as he rested his right elbow on the floor.
"AUUGHH!"
Harry looked at his right shoulder. It was only then when he realized that it had swollen to twice its size. On Voyager, he had hit the floor much harder than he thought.
"Going in," Tom announced over the combadge, "shields up!"
He did not hear his friend's yell, which was muffled by the Jeffries tube.
The Delta Flyer rocked violently and buzzing erupted all around it as the ions in the calm of the storm grazed the shields.
Tom watched the front viewscreen carefully, the pink ions looming all around. The Flyer. The next storm wave was coming in even closer.
"Harry, I need more power to the shields and warp drive," Tom said, slapping his combadge, "we need to get through here as quickly as possible. And in one piece, preferably."
Harry winced, the pain in his shoulder augmenting.
"I'm getting there," he said.
He tried to move crawl forward, but he could not move his entire right arm. His shoulder was in too much pain. Without the use of both arms, he wouldn't be able to pull his body forward. But he didn't have the luxury of time to think.
He shifted to his side and used his left arm to place his legs forward. Then, he placed his left hand on the grate floor of the Jeffries tube, putting his entire weight on his legs and left hand. Just as he was about to move forward, the Delta Flyer was hit with an ion burst, sending him to the floor.
"Harry, I need more power to shields, now!"
He had to get to those panels. Without even thinking about it, Harry moved forward, slowly, but surely, pushing the toolkit forward every few steps. It seemed to take an eternity before he reached the right panel. Once he got there, he tore off the panel cover with his left hand and went to work.
The Delta Flyer's shields, internal stabilizers, and warp drive strengthened. With its newly acquired power and one of the best pilots in Starfleet at the helm, the Delta Flyer moved and ebbed between ion storm waves.
"Oh no," Tom gasped as he stared at the viewscreen. Even with his piloting skills and Harry's modifications, the storm had still managed to close its way around them. They only had half a kilometer to go. They'd had to punch their way through. They'd be able to survive for a few seconds, but not much longer than that.
"Hang on," Tom said, bracing himself as he reached for the controls to warp drive, "these next few seconds are going to be a little bumpy."
"Whad'ya mean 'a little bumpy,'" Harry asked, "you mean this isn't rough enough?"
The lights dimmed as the Flyer used all residual power to speed its way though the last leg. Just before the shuttle hit top speed, Tom glanced behind him to make sure the strengthened forcefields he erected around the dilithium containers were holding. They were.
He turned back around, grit his teeth, and braced himself for the bumpy ride.
Harry was jostled violently in the narrow Jeffries tube as the ion storm slammed the Delta Flyer with full force. It took all of Tom's strength to keep from being flung out of his seat.
In seconds, consoles started sparking and exploding all around the interior of the Flyer. Outside, the shields were holding, but just barely. Every so often, an ion stream would penetrate a weakness in the shields, tearing through an outer panel.
In the cacophony of explosions, Harry started to move away from the panel he was facing, but he didn't move quickly enough. The panel he had been working on a minute before, exploded in his face, slamming him hard against the back of the Jeffries tube.
"Just a two more seconds," Tom shouted, more to himself than anyone else. Though those two seconds might as well have been two more hours.
Finally, the Delta Flyer cleared the ion storm, more or less intact.
Tom pushed himself off the floor. That last second finally hit the Delta Flyer hard enough for him to be pitched out of his seat. He touched the side of his face, which was bleeding. But he wasn't concerned about that.
"Harry?"
No answer.
"Harry!"
Quickly, he got to his feet and raced to the back of the Delta Flyer.
Harry slowly opened his eyes, his vision blurry at first. The Doctor's face came into focus.
"Hello Mr. Kim," the Doctor greeted nonchalantly, "how are you feeling?"
Harry looked around him. He was in Voyager's Sickbay. Tom, the captain, and the Doctor were standing next to him as he laid on a biobed. Harry tried to get back up, but the pain in his shoulder, head, and face forced him back down.
"Sore," he answered simply.
"It's no wonder," the Doctor explained, "a ligament in your right shoulder is inflamed, you have second degree burns on your face, and a slight concussion. But with my skill, you'll be good as new in a few hours."
"You okay, Tom?" Harry asked, looking at his friend.
Tom nodded. He knew his friend was referring to more than just physical injuries.
"Thanks to the both of you," Captain Janeway said, smiling with pride, "we have enough dilithium to fill Voyager's tanks and several reserves. We increased power to the transporters and beamed the both of you out when you cleared the ion storm."
She studied Harry's face, which was covered in deep burns.
"That must've been quite a ride."
"… piece of cake," Tom said.
"Yeah," Harry said, "piece of Tarkazian blood cake sprinkled with hard-to-swallow leola roots."
The three gave disgusted, but pleasant smiles.
Harry laid back down, but as soon as he did so, he tried to get back up. He felt something. Something he hadn't felt in a very long time.
"Relax, Mr. Kim."
Harry tried again, propping himself up on his left elbow. Could it be true? He tried again, and his right leg moved. Not just a few inches, but it swung out wide almost a foot with very little effort.
Harry breathed in, not believing what he was seeing. The Doctor carefully waved a hand-scanner over his right leg and smiled broadly. The lieutenant and captain watched intently.
"Your legs have regained its muscle mass by ten percent," the Doctor said.
"But how?" Harry asked, still looking at his legs in awe. He tried to move his left leg, which responded the same as his right.
"I've been trying all this time and I've made no progress. Why now?"
The Doctor stepped back, processing the new information.
"All that physical therapy and exercise you have been putting yourself through seems to have paid off," he explained, "Your muscles regained mass from the accumulation of those physical therapy sessions. It may not have been noticeable before, but you have been making progress all this time, little by little. Even my medical tricorder couldn't pick up the slow progress you made, but it's obvious now that you have been regaining the strength in your legs."
Harry thought back.
"That's how I got to the control panel in the Jeffries tube," he said, "I didn't pull my body with my one good arm, my legs pushed me forward."
"If you keep up the physical therapy regimen you've been doing, you should be walking on your own in four weeks."
Without warning, tears of joy started to fill Harry's eyes, and when he looked up, the captain was on the verge of tears herself.
"Congratulations, ensign," she smiled, "…. You've done well."
Tom stood by without knowing what to say. Finally, he simply patted his friend on the back and smiled, unable to put into words just how happy he was for his friend.
When Harry left Sickbay, Tom began to follow, but the Doctor stopped him.
"I-I'm sorry," the Doctor said, "I didn't know Ensign Kim would recover. In fact, I'm still wondering how he did it. I shouldn't have pushed you to tell Mr. Kim-"
"I did tell him," Tom replied, "...I finally told him he'd never be able to walk again. But he just wouldn't listen to me."
Tom finished with a smile.
"I still don't understand," the Doctor said, searching his memory engrams, "all my research, all my studies say he shoud not have recovered."
"Doc," Tom said, patting the Doctor on the shoulder, "some things can't be taught in digial books or downladed into medical files."
Tom left Sickbay, leaving a brooding holographic doctor in his wake.
"Are you sure you'll be okay?" B'Elanna Torres asked, looking at Tom.
Tom nodded.
"I'll be in my quarters if you need me," she whispered. She left his quarters, the doors hissing behind her. Several moments later, Tom finally got off the couch and picked up the data padd on his table.
"Computer…"
The computer beeped in response.
"Begin recording."
He took a deep breath and let it out slowly.
"Dear Mr. and Mrs. Hayes, Rictor, and Hernandez. I-I know you haven't heard from me since the accident…"
A lump started to form in Tom's throat. He knew it was going to be hard, he just didn't realize just how hard it would be. Since the incident at Caldik Prime, he had not spoken to the parents of the officers who died under his command. Nor did he attend the officers' funerals. The thought of facing the friends and loved ones of the officers whom he led to their deaths, was just too much. At the time, he was just coming to grips with reality himself.
"… and I wouldn't blame you if you just threw this into the molecular trash right now, but please.. hear me out. There's something I would like to say. Something I owe to all of you.
"I'm sorry."
Tears started to well in the lieutenant's eyes, but he forged ahead.
"I-I p-pushed the shuttle to reckless speed, causing the deaths of your daughters and son. I am so sorry. Since the accident, there wasn't a day that went by that I didn't think about what happened. How I ended three innocent lives….
"Mr. and Mrs. Hayes, your son was such a dedicated, hard-working Starfleet officer. He and I once worked all night on a plasma manifold assignment. I wanted to go to bed, but he encouraged me to go on. Needless to say, our professor was impressed with our work. Most of which, was his idea.
"Mr. and Mrs. Rictor, Samantha was so quick in thinking and executing commands, I nicknamed her 'Warp Speed Sam.' Several times, she'd execute commands so quickly, our professors hardly knew what happened. In a flight simulation, she avoided a warp core breach with seconds to spare.
"Mr. and Mrs. Hernandez, your daughter was destined for a stellar Starfleet career. Not only was she an excellent officer, she had an incredible gift of bringing people together and getting them to come to an agreement. She always saw the good side of people and let others know it. If there were a ship of Cardassians and Klingons, I wouldn't be surprised if she had them working together within an hour.
"… I'm sorry it's taken this long for me to apologize. After the accident, I didn't want to face the truth, but that's no excuse for my not explaining myself to you."
Tom took another deep breath as tears finally started to fall.
"I'm not going to ask you to forgive me because to tell you the truth, I don't know if I'd be able to if I were you. I… I just want you to know that I'm sorry. I really am sorry…."
Finally, Tom began to cry.
"C-computer, stop recording."
It took several moments before he could speak again.
"… computer, save letter and download to the computer consoles of the Hayes, Rictor, and Hernandez family when we are within communications range of Earth."
Tom took a shuddering, but relieved breath as the computer acknowledged the command with a beep.
Over the next several days, Harry upped his physical therapy sessions to three hour-long sessions a day. At first, he was able to move his legs one step at a time with the help of the highest settings on his leg braces. Then slowly, he began to decrease the electrical stimulation settings. Until finally, it was time…
Carefully, Harry pulled off the leg braces he had depended on for so long. He had abandoned the crutches days ago and never looked back.
He slowly rose out of the chair he was sitting in and his hands hovered over the parallel bars. Harry was running the physical therapy program for another, yet hopefully last time.
Slowly, he took one step in front of the other… and walked for the first time in over a month and a half. He had beaten the Doctor's prediction of walking by a week. Three weeks after collecting the dilithium from the planet, he was walking; under his own power.
boop
"Captain to Ensign Kim," Janeway's voice emanated from Harry's combadge.
"Yes captain?" Harry's joy could be heard through the sound of his voice.
"In the Briefing Room… now."
Harry's moment of joy immediately dissipated when the heard the tone of the captain's voice. The captain was not happy and her anger was directed at him.
Harry left the Holodeck, his mind running a mile a minute. What could have done wrong? He didn't even realize how easy it was for him to walk the halls of Voyager.
It seemed to take an eternity for him to reach the Briefing Room. When he did, he found the captain was not alone. The entire senior staff was seated around the table. All looked up at him when he entered the room. A cold seat began to form on Harry's forehead.
He headed towards the only empty seat, but the captain rose from the chair.
"I'd prefer you stand, ensign."
This was it. He was going to be reprimanded in front of the entire senior staff. For what? He was still trying to figure out. Maybe logging in several hours on the Holdeck for his physical therapy sessions? But he was never late for his shifts, nor did he leave early. In fact, the past several days he had logged in several hours to repair key systems.
Also, he never knew the captain to publicly reprimand an officer…
Harry stood at attention and faced Janeway at the front of the Briefing Room.
"Captain," he said, trying hard not to let his nervousness show.
"Ensign Kim," she said sternly, "you are charged with…"
Harry sucked in a breath through his grit teeth. Here it comes…
"… going above and beyond the call of duty on numerous occasions," the captain continued; her voice was much gentler and she had a smile on her face, "You've protected this entire crew by standing up to the Hirogen, you risked your life by holding this ship intact when Voyager encountered a divergence field, you saved Naomi Wildman, and you protected a friend while being falsely accused and imprisoned for terrorism, even when you were badly injured yourself.
"Between all that, you have performed your duties with admiral dedication, hard-work, and you've come up with several technological innovations, giving Voyager invaluable improvements to its technology."
Harry sighed in relief and the senior crew smiled. The lieutenant pilot seated near him was grinning from ear to ear.
"It is with great pleasure," the captain said, pulling something out of her pocket. She opened her hand face up and Harry saw a pip in the palm of her hand, "that I promote you to the rank of lieutenant."
The senior staff erupted in applause as Janeway fixed the new pip to Harry's collar.
"I-I will perform my new duties and responsibilities," Harry said, still reeling from what had just happened, "to the best of my ability. Thank you, captain."
The captain smiled and shook her head wryly.
"Don't thank me," she responded, "you deserve it."
The senior staff filed out of the conference room, each congratulating Harry. All of them also acknowledged his ability to walk. That did not go unnoticed.
Tom, on his way out of the Briefing Room, patted his friend on the shoulder.
"You knew, didn't you?" Harry smiled.
"Hey," Tom said feigning defense, "all of us knew. I was just going with the flow."
"And you enjoyed it, didn't you?" Harry laughed.
Tom patted his friend on the shoulder again and looked Harry in the eyes.
"Every minute of it."
Harry sat in the mess hall, watching as Neelix placed a bowl of Tarameesium hair chowder in front of him.
"Looks delicious," Tom commented from across the table.
"Thank you," Neelix said, "but you haven't tried it yet."
The Talaxian placed a bowl in front of him as well.
"Harry's going to try it first."
The Talaxian looked at Harry, expectantly.
Seven of Nine approached the table and faced Harry.
"May I ask you something?"
Harry nodded and stood from his seat, walking to the side.
"I owe you an apology," she said.
"… For what?" Harry asked after searching his memory for what she could be talking about.
"When you were strengthening your legs during physical therapy with no discernable progress, I referred to your actions as inefficient… futile. But it was clear that I was wrong. Had you listened to me, you would have stopped your progress and you never would have walked."
"… yeah, well," Harry said, not caring too much to relive that memory, "you were also trying to force me to face the truth."
"May I ask you another question?"
"Sure."
"When it was clear that you were making no progress in walking, why did you continue your physical therapy sessions?"
Harry paused, trying to think how best to convey the roller coaster of emotions he had endured the past several weeks.
"…Because I didn't want to give up hope," he said after some thought, "Once you start losing hope, you start creating your own reality. And the reality I faced was something I never wanted to face.
"To tell you the truth, a part of me knew the chances of me walking again were very slim. Guess I was just too stubborn to admit reality."
The former Borg nodded. Satisfied with the answer, she walked away.
Harry returned to his seat, and after as much stalling as he could, he took a spoonful of Tarameeseum hair chowder.
"Well…?" Neelix asked.
"… It's delicious," Harry said as the creamy, warm chowder ran down his throat. The Tarameeseum hair had a light sweet taste to it, a perfect complement to the chowder.
Tom raised his eyebrows, trying to make sure his friend wasn't tricking him. But finally, he gave it a try and liked it, too.
A few days later, Harry and Tom were in Holodeck Two, the same Holodeck Harry had logged so many hours in for his physical therapy sessions. But this program was different.
"Computer, run Holodeck Program Paris five."
The Holodeck formed itself into a basketball court.
"Call it in the air," Tom said before tossing the simulated coin that would determine who got the ball first, "this is one-on-one, lieutenant to lieutenant."
Soon, the two were playing basketball, just like they had so many weeks ago. Harry had finally regained all strength and muscle in his legs. He moved and ran with ease, a fact that escaped neither officer.
Harry arrived on the Bridge and settled into his station. It felt good to return to his console under his own power.
"There's some subspace distortions directly ahead of us," Tom said from his station at the helm.
"Can we plot a course around it?" the captain asked.
"Yes," Tom answered, "it'll only take two days to get around them, but we'll have to keep a constant watch on their position."
"Lieutenant Kim," Janeway said, making sure to emphasize his new rank, "keep a sensor lock on the distortions. Make sure we keep a distance of at least twenty kilometers away."
"Aye captain."
Voyager sped through the black space, dappled with stars. Lieutenant Kim watched as the ship easily maneuvered around the distortions. Though it was an ordinary moment, the lieutenant relished every moment of it. He stood at his station, gently pushing the chair he needed before, behind him.
Once they were cleared of the distortions, Voyager's flanking warp coils angled up and the ship sped away in a streak. Lieutenant Kim watched the stars became streaks as Voyager sped into warp, several thousand kilometers away; several thousand kilometers closer to home.
I hope you have enjoyed my story. I certainly enjoyed writing it. Thank you so very much to all reviewers. I love to write, and reviewers make writing so rewarding:)