24 HOURS LATER:

Voyager sat unmoving in the still morning air, sunlight glinting on her battered hull. Janeway watched from the nearby hillside as her crew moved over and around the ship. Remembering.

No one had died in the crash. Landing. Whatever it was -- although there had been numerous injuries and contusions, not least of which was Tom Paris' broken arm. Of course, as the unofficial hero of the day, he was having too much fun pretending to be modest to pay any attention to his injury -- although she was sure he would exploit the break later to enhance his heroic status.

A smile crossed Janeway's face -- Torres' meeting with the Pilot in sickbay had been...emotional...to say the least. In front of at least a dozen eyewitnesses, including Janeway herself, B'Elanna (who had sustained a concussion and two cracked ribs during the crash) had marched into sickbay, seized the startled Paris by the shirt, kissed him briefly and violently, then swore at him and hit him on the jaw. Hard. Needless to say, she had gotten his attention. And everyone else's.

Janeway's smile widened...then faded abruptly as her gaze returned to her crippled ship. She sighed, shifting her weight on the stony ground.

Voyager would fly again, the Engineering team had reassured her, but it would take several months of intensive repairs to get her spaceworthy again. For the moment, they were trapped on Anari, just as the Wraiths had been.

Janeway bit her lip. So much had happened, and she had had so little time absorb all of it. At first, when she had awakened on the Bridge, there had been so much to do --assess the damage, get the Doctor's program back on line, care for the wounded...but Janeway had found herself being unceremoniously bustled off to sickbay along with the injured. She had protested...and her First Officer had curtly told her she was still relieved of command and had threatened to do something dire if she didn't listen to him for once.

She had listened...but only because she had still been weak as water.

The Doctor's cure had worked and, after several hours, he had pronounced her fit to leave sickbay...on the condition that she do nothing for the next forty-eight hours. So here she sat, watching her crew begin to tackle the formidable job of repairing the ship. She sighed again, her thoughts returning to the events of the past few days...

Eidolon's memories were fading rapidly. She no longer remembered what if felt like to be shot in the back, no longer experienced the lightning flashes of understanding she had weathered when there had been two sets of memories in her mind. It was as if, now that she had finished his task for him, the Wraith was slowly fading away, erasing even the memory of what had happened.

Janeway tossed a pebble down the hillside, frowning. She still didn't know what to think of Eidolon. He had done... horrible things. But he had also stood up to his people for what he believed in. Perhaps he had been right, three weeks ago -- perhaps they did have something in common after all...

The Shay'anari, on the other hand, had destroyed an entire world, sacrificed millions, just to go home. Janeway closed her eyes, remembering her own decision to destroy the Array...and the faint sense of guilt that had lingered within her for three years, vanished without a trace. The crew of Voyager were nothing like the Shay'anari. They were better.

With an effort she put the Wraiths out of her mind and opened her eyes to stare blankly at the ship. And her thoughts strayed unbidden to...

Chakotay.

She had told him she loved him. In front of everyone. She couldn't deny it, couldn't pretend she had never said it... She couldn't pretend, even to herself, that she hadn't meant it...

She did love him. She didn't know when it had happened, couldn't identify the exact moment, the precise day when she had fallen in love with her First Officer. It could have been the moment he first ran his hands over her hair on New Earth...or perhaps the moment when a surge of jealously had swept over her as she suspected that he and Riley had... Hastily she banished that thought.

Her First Officer. A shiver ran up her spine. They certainly didn't cover this sort of thing at Starfleet Academy. There was no rule against it...precisely...but Captain's didn't fall in love with crewmembers, especially their First Officers... They just didn't.

On the other hand -- they were at least 67 years away from the closest Starbase. Who was going to mind? Certainly not Mark -- she was certain he would have moved on when he heard she was missing, presumed dead. She didn't expect him to wait more than half a century for her. And -- she wasn't sure she even wanted him to. Wasn't sure she wanted anything except...

...Chakotay. Warmth ran through her. He was...everything she could ever want. The best First Officer, the best friend she had ever had -- with so many good qualities she couldn't even begin to name them. Plus the man positively oozed sex appeal. Memories of the kiss they had shared on the holodeck -- was it only days ago? -- seared through her mind.

It was at that moment, when her rampant imagination was replaying the kiss, lingering slowly over every sensuous detail...that a step sounded behind her. Janeway hastily twisted around, all but falling over sideways as her legs refused to unfold themselves... and Chakotay reached out a hand to steady her.

She found herself gazing numbly into a pair of dark brown eyes, his hand on her shoulder and an expression of concern on his face. And suddenly it was taking every last bit of willpower not to fling herself at him...

"Are you all right?"

"What?" It came out as a squeak.

His frown deepened. "Are you all right?" he repeated worriedly.

"Oh. Sure. Yes. Fine. How are you?" Briefly her eyes closed. Damn. From sane adult to gibbering idiot in less than a second... She opened her eyes and started again. "Yes," she said, more steadily. "I'm fine. What are you doing here?"

Chakotay shifted uncomfortably. "I...was worried about you. The Doctor told me where you were. May I?" He waved an arm at the ground beside her. She nodded dumbly and he sat, casually pulling his hand away from her shoulder as he did. Then he turned away to stare down at the ship, rubbing his knee absently. Janeway followed his gaze and an awkward silence descended.

"We have to talk." He said it with the air of a man attending his own funeral.

Janeway nodded. "Yes." More silence. She cast him a quick furtive look. For a man who obviously had things on his mind, he was being very quiet. Her mind, unbidden, returned to the kiss.

When Chakotay did break the silence, she had just reached the point where his hands had been moving slowly across her body and his...

"Kathryn..."

She jumped violently. "Huh?" Another squeak. He cast her a questioning glance then continued.

"If the Guardian triggered the initial energy wave that destroyed the planet, why did it spent the next thousand years containing the subsequent waves?"

This was what he wanted to talk about? The vision of the kiss vanished in a puff of logic and she frantically tried to refocus her mind.

"I'm not sure," she managed to say. "Self-preservation? Guilt? Does it matter?"

"No. I suppose not." The conversation staggered to another halt.

Finally, Janeway decided she could take no more of this. Taking a deep breath she turned to face him and said: "Chakotay -- why did you really come up here?"

He stiffened as if she had struck him, still not meeting her gaze. "I wanted to know if..."

She interrupted him abruptly, not giving herself a chance to think about what she was going to say. "You wanted to know if what I said over the comlink was true. You wanted to know if I loved you." Her voice shook but she sailed gallantly on. "Well...it was. And I do."

She had never seen anyone look quite so stunned. If she had suddenly stripped naked and done a belly dance, he might have been more surprised...but she doubted it. A shell-shocked expression seemed to have taken up permanent residence on his face.

He also seemed to have forgotten how to breathe. For a long moment she watched him slowly turn purple. She was just beginning to wonder if she would have to perform mouth to mouth on him...which was leading her mind off on another delightful tangent, when he suddenly exhaled, choked, and coughed. Janeway waited patiently.

Finally, when he could breathe again he looked up. A nervous tremor went through her.

"Um..." he finally said, "actually I was going to ask how you were feeling. If the Doctor's cure...had worked."

"Oh." Janeway froze then looked away. "I...see. I..." She floundered helplessly... For an instant he didn't move, then he smiled and reached out a hand to brush her cheek.

"But...since you brought the subject up..."

"I...um..."

"Shh," he said softly, then pulled her firmly into his embrace, whispering her name. His arms went around her and his lips sought and met hers.

The kiss started lightly, as if he were afraid she would break. And then her fingers moved up to run through his hair, and his grip tightened, reaction going through him. He could have lost her. So many times during the past three weeks she could have died, in a hundred different ways. But she hadn't. They hadn't. She was here. And she loved him. He was trembling, he noticed distantly. They both were.

Chakotay pulled away slightly and she met his gaze then hesitatingly moved one hand to lightly trace the outline of his tattoo. "Do you have any idea how long I've wanted to do that," she said softly.

A faint smile lit his face. "Probably as long as I've wanted to do this..." He cupped her face with both hands and kissed her again, more forcefully this time...and Janeway went up in flames.

Somehow, over the space of the next few moments, Janeway found herself being pressed back onto the rocky ground, his body covering hers and his tongue gently pressing her lips open. She didn't resist. Instead, she arched her back, drawing his body closer. Her eyes flickered shut as the sensations within her continued to build.

She had wanted -- no, needed -- this for so long. Needed him. Chakotay. She ran her hands down his back, savouring the feel of the muscles, the tension knotting his shoulders. And then Chakotay's tongue ran briefly along her lips before plummeting deeply into her mouth. His left hand roamed down her side to her hip then back up to her breast. The other held her securely in place as if afraid she was going to try to escape...which she wasn't...

Janeway's hands wandered over his body, but she was growing more than a little annoyed with the material in her way. The quivering need running through her was turning into a raging inferno, leaving her weak and shaking. She needed him naked. NOW. With fingers that trembled, she reached for the front of his shirt, trying to pull it free.

Chakotay quivered at her touch then responded by moving even closer, if that were possible. He pulled his mouth away long enough to trail fire down her throat, before returning his mouth to hers, murmuring her name brokenly.

A tremor went through Janeway at the raw urgent need in his voice. Part of her wondered dimly at the awkwardness of their position -- most of his weight was on his elbows and knees on the rocky ground...there were stones and pebbles beneath them both... But Chakotay didn't seem to mind...and as he touched the sensitive places just below her ribs, neither did she...

Janeway moaned as he tugged her own shirt loose, running one hand up under it to caress the bare skin. "Chakotay," she whispered...and then a distant noise penetrated the fog in her mind. She frowned, trying to concentrate -- a task made doubly difficult by the fact that Chakotay's lips had moved to her left ear while his hand was working miracles beneath her uniform -- and opened her eyes...

"Not again!" was the first thought that went through her mind. The second was "No. Not now. Please, not now!"

Standing nearby, Paris, Kes, and Neelix were blocking out the sunlight, identical expressions on their faces as they gazed down at their commanding officers. Janeway gasped and stiffened. Chakotay looked up...

"I don't believe it." He said it out loud, closing his eyes for just a moment.

Janeway didn't either. Only days ago, Harry, B'Elanna, and Tom had walked in on them in the holodeck, finding them in precisely the same position. And now...

Damn, damn, and damn! Janeway started to scramble out from under her First Officer, her dazed mind already trying to come up with an explanation -- beyond the obvious -- but Chakotay caught her wrist, halting her escape. Instead, he slowly raised himself off her and climbed to his feet, reaching a hand down to help her up. She tugged down her shirt then climbed to her feet, swaying slightly against his chest as she did. His arm went around her to steady her...and didn't let go. Janeway found herself imprisoned in his embrace, unable to step away... And then he turned back to the others, still holding her tightly, a determined expression on his face.

"Yes?" He said evenly, as if he hadn't just been found on top of his Captain. Still, there was a note of menace in his voice, as if he were daring any of them to say anything. Anything at all.

Nobody did. A long silence descended. Paris and Neelix were both grinning idiotically, while Kes' smile was just as pleased...but less surprised. At last the Ocampan woman spoke. "Lieutenant Tuvok asked us to come and find you both. He wanted to discuss setting up camp while we repair the ship."

Janeway's chin came up slightly as Chakotay's arm tightened around her. "We'll be there in a minute," she managed to croak, not quite meeting their eyes. Chakotay said nothing, dismissal nevertheless radiating from him.

The three crewmembers hesitated for a moment, Paris looking very much as if he wanted to say something, then Kes cast the other two a pointed glance and they nodded, turning to go. As they walked away, Paris, unable to resist the impulse, turned and said over his shoulder: "No need to hurry, Captain. We'll just tell Tuvok you've got your hands full..." And then he winked at them. All three vanished around the rocky path.

Janeway's jaw had dropped open, a flicker of some emotion...she wasn't sure which one...going through her. Beside her, Chakotay twitched. She turned to look up at him, squinting in the bright sunlight...and her suspicions were confirmed. He was nobly trying to suppress his mirth.

"Hands full..." He repeated, a laugh escaping him.

Janeway stared at him balefully. "It's not funny," she said. "You do realize the entire ship will know within the hour. Even if Tom doesn't say anything, Neelix certainly will..."

He sobered quickly. "Did you want to keep it a secret?" There was an uncertain note in his voice now. His arm was still around her, she noted dimly.

"Well...no. But...I just..." She swallowed. "I don't know. I don't know how to deal with this. Starfleet protocol doesn't exactly cover situations like this..."

His eyes met hers. "Kathryn -- I love you. I'll handle this any way you want to. But there's one thing I won't do."

"What's that?" It came out as a whisper.

"I won't give you up. I don't care if we try to keep it hidden or shout it over the ship's comlink...but I won't give this up." And he bent his head and kissed her again.

The strength of the response that surged through her was overwhelming, but somehow Janeway found the willpower to end the kiss. Closing her eyes, she curled her fingers in his and leaned into his shoulder. "Well, we can't broadcast it over the comlink..." She hesitated and he stiffened "...because the communication systems are down, remember?" Janeway smiled as his brief tension faded.

"On the other hand," she continued, opening her eyes to glance up at him, noting the faint expression of relief that crossed his face. "I'd say it's too late to try to hide anything. So I suppose the only question is..." Her voice trailed off.

"What?" Chakotay couldn't quite hide the alarm in his voice.

"...is if you're going to escort me to my cabin willingly or if I'm going to have to make it an order." Her smile widened.

He smiled back, that rare grin that always seemed to make her toes curl...and her breath caught in her throat. She loved this man. Suddenly she felt like bursting into song.

"Can't," Chakotay said succinctly, pulling her closer. "I relieved you of command, remember? I'm still in charge."

She mock-frowned. "Yes...that's something else I want to discuss..."

He lifted one hand to run it over her hair. "So why don't we discuss it in your cabin...Kathryn?" He bent his head... and Janeway promptly forgot whatever she had been about to say while around them, only the cry of a distant bird broke the silence.