"Fowl…where have I heard that name before?" Satori faced backwards towards Artemis as he walked. The brown haired boy cocked his head to the side, as if trying to remember something extremely important.

The two boys had begun their short trek to the common room, leaving Bo behind. Being the prideful genius that he was, Artemis had refused to abandon his own confident-albeit slow-stride to keep up with Satori.

Artemis shot an icy I'm-not-telling-you glare at the taller boy. He sharply glanced at the Rolex buckled around his left wrist. Good, it was almost time for dinner. Artemis himself had become quite peckish in these past few hours. He would quickly check in with the head of the dorm, and then hurry to the dining hall.

Satori snapped his fingers. "Of course! Your father was the one who went missing several years ago in Russia. It was splashed all over the news."

"Hmm…how wonderful of you to remember." Artemis murmured.

"Thanks. Well here we are." Satori paused in front of a pair of solid oak doors. He leaned against the door, patiently waiting for Artemis to catch up. Artemis quickened his pace, and managed to reach Satori in record time.

He glared at the taller boy. Well? Wasn't Satori going to open the doors? Artemis tried to push his way past, but the other boy stopped him.

"Wait for Bo." He said, grinning.

Artemis heard the methodical thud of running feet several meters away. Bo suddenly whipped around the corner in full sprint, his dark hair flying behind him. Satori lazily stuck a foot out into the hallway. Sure enough, Bo snagged his own foot on Satori's and flopped to the floor with a sound thump.

"Door's right here genius. You don't have to run anymore." Satori said. He bent down and pulled the smaller boy up by his blazer collar.

Bo glared at him. "I knew that!" He snapped. Without any further ado, he shoved open the doors and stomped into Dorm Nine's common room.

Satori faced Artemis and lowered himself into a bow. "After you." He said.

Artemis nearly rolled his eyes at this clichéd gesture. Instead, he ignored Satori's smirking face and strolled through the doors.

The genius had expected to have walked in on the dorm head's speech. A speech that, per custom, is always given on the first day. Instead he was met with silence. It wasn't just any silence, such as an empty room silence, or the quiet silence that comes with students working on several hours of homework. The icy feeling of this particular silence could easily chill souls and create goose bumps on top of goose bumps.

Artemis instantly realized what kind of silence this was. It was the type of silence that only occurred when a teacher in the room was extremely angry. And judging by the frozen body of Bo several steps ahead of him, he was the target of the teacher's anger.

The teacher in question stood erect in the middle of the common room's living area. The rest of Artemis's so-called "peers" were lounging on the sofa, frozen as well by the cutting anger of the dorm head.

The teacher's face was deeply wrinkled with the long years of stress he had endured instructing the boys of St. Bartleby's. What remained of the teacher's hair was stark white and wispy. His drab suit hung limply along his frail frame. Artemis realized that if in fact he ever had the chance to face this man one on one in combat, this might be the one opponent he could beat.

Of course Artemis's assumptions changed completely once the man opened his mouth. His voice was like a foghorn; slightly muffled but still blaringly loud.

"HOW DARE YOU ENTER MY COMMON ROOM LATE!" He boomed at Bo. Artemis could have sworn the already short boy shrank another few inches. Bo's shoulder's instinctively rose and his knuckles whitened as he clenched his fists in fear.

"SIT DOWN NOW!" He ordered, thrusting his index finger out towards an empty seat on the sofa. Bo silently did as he was told. The other students shifted slightly on the couch, making room for his small frame.

The man glared at Bo for several seconds before noticing Artemis out of the corner of his eye. He spun on his heel to face the genius. With nostrils flaring and his face red from shouting he screamed again, "ANOTHER ONE?! HOW IS IT THAT THERE ARE SO MANY LATE STUDNETS?!"

Artemis took two deep breaths to keep himself calm. He would never be afraid of a teacher, no matter at what volume their voice was. "There is a perfectly reasonable explanation for my tardiness. If for one moment you could quiet yourself down; then perhaps I can explain."

His downright directness shocked the teacher. Most students had cowered in fear even at the thought of his yells. Yet this one had somehow managed to remain calm.

Taking advantage of the teacher's silence, Artemis opened his mouth once more to speak. But before he could say a word he was cut short by the loud slam of the porch door several meters behind the back of the couch.

All the students turned around in their seats to catch a glimpse of the man in the doorway. His tall athletic build was complemented by the slightly round features of his face. His bangs flopped forward over his hazel eyes.

The man strolled into the room as if he owned the place, all the while stroking his thin beard. As he smiled, faint wrinkles appeared in the corners of his eyes. "I'm sorry Dr. Burke. I think we should switch dorms again. I want to be back in the dorm I was originally assigned to."

Dr. Burke inhaled heavily through his nose, and held his breath for several seconds. As he released the breath through his mouth, he nodded. "I agree. I'd rather be working with more responsible seventh years than this bunch." He glared disdainfully at the boys.

The bearded man rushed back out to through the porch door, and then re-entered with several suitcases in tow. "I thought you might say that. Good thing I brought all my stuff with me, eh?" He shoved his suitcases up against the back of the long couch and leaped to Dr. Burke's side. "Now why don't I introduce myself to the kids while you get packed up?"

"Very well. I will be up in my rooms." He began to leave the room. As he walked past Artemis he scowled and pointed to the couch. "You! Go sit down!"

Artemis returned the old man's scowl two-fold and made his way over to the couch. The common room's single couch was basically a high quality L shaped piece of furniture made of plush maroon material. Al though it was large, there was no room for Artemis. He made do by delicately positioning himself on the equally plush and maroon footrest.

Their new dorm head cleared his throat. "Well, it looks as though you're all here." This made Artemis turn and do a quick head count of the boys. Satori waved to him from his position between a red headed boy and the arm rest. How did he manage to sneak in the room without being seen?

"No wait." The man said. His brow furrowed in confusion as he shoved his hand down his pants pocket. He pulled out a crumpled piece of paper and smoothed it out. "Who are you?" He asked Bo.

Bo stood. "Bardoe Larsen."

"But you're not on my list. Are you sure you have the right dorm?"

The boy ran a hand through his spikes. "I am the transfer student from the U.S. You must not have me registered in the system yet."

Their dorm head motioned for him to sit down. "Okay, whatever. My name is Mr. Mackey. I expect all of you to go to dinner in the dinning hall then retire to your rooms. Tomorrow classes will begin so be up bright and early. I will be in the teacher's lounge if you need me." With that he strolled out the door once more.

The students immediately scattered after the door slammed. Artemis himself rose and was about to leave for dinner when Satori tapped him on the shoulder. Artemis brushed away the hand. "I would prefer that you just leave me alone so I can eat in peace at the dinning hall."

Satori laughed in his face. "Screw the dinning hall, how about we hit the town for food?"

Artemis glared at him. "No."

"Aw, but why not? Are you chicken?" Satori sneered. "Everyone is going."

"Well then all the more reason I am not going." Artemis crossed his arms. Couldn't this boy take the hint?

"That doesn't answer my question." Satori mirrored Artemis, and crossed his arms as well.

"Do you need me to spell it out for you? I guess you do. I do not want to "hit the town", as you call it, with morons like yourselves. None of you could hold a conversation for more than thirty seconds with someone as ingenious as I. It would be a clear waste of time for both you and me if I attend." Artemis smirked.

"Okaaay. You go ahead and hang out in the dinning hall alone. Oh wait, you won't be alone. I'm sure Dr. Poe would keep you company. You know how much he likes to cozy up to the loner-types." Satori sneered as Artemis's face lost its arrogant smirk.

It was true. Dr. Poe did try to befriend anyone he caught alone. Artemis sighed. He had two choices: either go out with his peers or stay in with Dr. Poe.

"The town has better food…" Satori prompted. "...and you can wear whatever you want…"

"Fine, I'll go." Artemis said.

Satori wrapped an arm around the genius's shoulders and flashed him a toothy grin. "I'm glad you see it my way." He turned his head to face several other boys ambling about the kitchen. "Hey! Get ready to go out! Artemis is paying!"

"What?!"

A/N: This story is basically a war and peace plotless fic. It's a multitude of sub-plots and no real main plot. Please review ; )