circle I Hate That I Don't Hate You

IMPORTANT!: This story is composed of a series of vignettes which cover a time that spans through Briar and Sandry's relationship. I suppose a 6 year span. So, each story will cover a different year. I'll post what time span you'll be reading about, so you won't be confused. Don't think this goes in straight order, like today then tomorrow then the day after that. It's like, one year, then the other, then the other, etc. So, yeah, just thought I'd tell you that.

Disclaimer: Imitation IS flattery you know. So, please don't sue me. All rights go to whoever owns them. I claim nothing.

A/N: First try at any Tamora Pierce fanfic. Be nice. CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM people! I'll brush off flames. But that doesn't mean flame me. I'm not stupid. Well, you know....

Friends and lovers go hand in hand, so don't be surprised if one turns out to be the other.
~Nico Aguayo~

Chapter 1: Just To See You Smile

(A week after "the gang" arrive at discipline for the first time.)

Briar huffed. He was feeling especially stubborn tonight, despite the fact he had been highly discouraged to act stubborn. However, he found little choice in the manner. Not only had he been raised on the streets all his life, where being stubborn was really not an option, but he had been carted off from the streets, (he didn't acknowledge the fact that it had saved his hide in doing so,) and shoved into some kind of environment that he had never known. This wasn't the streets. This was Discipline.

The name implied everything. If being stuck with three stubborn GIRLS, two obstinate woman (one of which was slightly crusty,) and and old headstrong man wasn't discipline, Briar didn't know what was. It was like being in a big concrete ball, while it rolled down a mountain. Except you didn't have a helmet on.

Briar frowned outside his door as he heard peels of girlie laughter coming from outside. He stared blankly at his door before falling back onto his bed, which was really just a mattress and pile of sheets on the floor.

Great, he thought sulkingly, a house of females. The perfect recipe for a guy to go soft. Rolling his eyes at the ceiling, he tore himself from glaring at the ceiling and turned over on his stomach. He squirmed in strange impatience before sighing.

All this wasn't what he had planned for his life just a few months ago. Instead, he planned on living on the streets for a few more years before he eventually got caught, carted off to some hard labor punishment, and tried to escape. For some strange reason, he never had thought about what life might of had been like. And as he started to imagine, he shivered and turned off his imagination. It had given him goose bumps. Briar ran a hand over his arm. Yep, there was a good amount of goose bumps on his skin.

A breeze came through his window. He propped himself on his elbows before taking a deep breath of the fresh air. Something was calling him outside. Something, something distant like. . .he didn't know. Sanity maybe. He was going to go insane if he didn't do something quick. With the too much extent of female interaction, a guy could forget who he was.

He grabbed a fresh shirt from his night stand and put it on, feeling the air come in more steadily. Yep, something was defiantly calling him. The plants maybe? Perhaps. Right then, Briar could care less. His highest priority was to get away.

He managed to creep out of his window and jump the distance it took from the window to the ground. It was pretty big leap down. He had jumped much larger with some of his "friends" on the street. He and his friend, TabbyCat, jumped from a five story building once to escape a bag. They had landed in a garbage bin, but that was beside the point.

When he did land, his feet hit soft ground. Briar gave the grounds a quick overlook before creeping through it like a slinking cat. When he reached the Discipline gate, he let his guard down and sighed. The girls were probably discussing stuff about dresses and lace and stuff Briar didn't understand.

His hands were on the gate latch when a voice called from the shadows, "Going somewhere?"

Briar spun around, obvious shock spread across his features, "Who's there?" His whole body froze with sudden surprise, but he was prepared, hoping to jump at whatever was stalking him.

He heard a rustle of leaves and someone land into the moonlight. He stared for a few brief seconds before he recognized the face. His shoulders physically sagged and his adrenaline went from soaring to falling down with a painful thud.

Great, just the person he wanted to see! Sandry! Excellent!

Not.

"What are you doing here?" Briar asked harshly, almost wincing at his words. He didn't make it sound like he was going to attack her. Yet, with his life on the streets, when an unexpected visit came, his voice always turned a bit gruff.

The gruffness in his voice didn't seem to phase Sandry in the least. Her face was lit with a perky smile and her eyes glittered a sparkly blue in the moonlight. She flicked a piece of hair out of her eyes, before walking towards him. "Last time I checked, I lived here." Her lips turned up into an almost smug smile, "By the way: Nice jump from the bedroom. It would've been better if you bent your knees before you landed though. It takes some of the force of falling away."

Briar glared at her before folding his arms across his chest, "Yeah, well, thanks a million for the tip. I'm quite sure you're an expert on jumping from buildings." He watched as she smiled knowingly and shrugged her shoulders. "But, do me a favor and tell me when you're spying on me. It'll keep me from being paranoid." Briar then turned sharply and started walking past the gate, letting the gate door slam behind him.

"Wait!" Came the call from behind him.

He turned on his heel and looked at Sandry. He decided then that he would never marry. Females were too much work. They wouldn't leave you alone. "What?" He asked impatiently.

Sandry waved something in the air before yelling back at him, "You hafta have one of these to get around Winding Circle," she paused, "at night at least."

Briar squinted in her direction. "Where do you get them?"

Her shoulders slumped in her exasperation. That made him frown. Surely, she had no right to be frustrated with him. It should be the other way around.

"Lark and Rosethorn only have one. You can't just get one." She yelled back, still waving the thing in the air.

Briar frowned heavily before he walked up to her. He eyed the small pass and then decided to make a grab for it. Unfortunately for him, that's just what Sandry had anticipated. She snatched her hand back in lightening quick speed and clicked her tongue in mocking disapproval.

"I don't think so, Briar Moss," She purred sarcastically, her eyes glittering. Briar simply tried to snatch it again, but she pulled her hand back further and he nearly feel over the gate in his attempt.

He swore under his breath before growling, "Come on." Another failed attempt at snatching the pass. "What do you need it for?" She was watching him with amusement in her eyes. He hated that. Briar made one last try to get the pass and then stopped, looking at Sandry breathless. "Okay, what do you want?"

She simply smiled at him before raising an appraising eyebrow.

Briar looked at her for a few brief seconds before taking another round of feeble attempts to snatch the pass. And they were, as noted, feeble.

Sandry giggled at him before shaking her head, "All right you street rogue," With that, she opened the gate door so that, as Briar went to snatch the pass, he fell over himself.

He braced himself for the impact. He suddenly realized that he never took a liking to nobles. Now, he was looking like a complete idiot, falling to the hard ground. . . in front of a noble.

Excellent! Wonderful!

Not.

Briar ground his teeth and when he landed on the ground, his breath was knocked right out of his lungs. He was going to swear, but the chance was never given to him due to the fact that there was no air in his lungs. Thanks very much to Noble Brat Sandry. He suddenly didn't care that she was a girl; she was going to get it when he got a hold of her.

However, he never had the chance. When he finally propped himself on his elbows he heard a chorus of muffled giggles. So that noble was laughing at him. Oh boy, if she only knew...

"Oh, I am really sorry!" Sandry exclaimed through her giggles, trying not to sound sarcastic. She had a feeling that he would be mad as soon as he came up. "I really am!" Another chuckle. "Are you okay?" She crouched down so that she was looking at him, her face spread with a large smile.

Briar tried his best to look mad, but her face was immediately in front of his and smiling away. And she looked. . . apologetic. Gods, she had a infectious smile. Great, just when he was going to give her a taste of her own medicine. And now he was finding that amusement was turning up in the corner of his mouth. When he thought about it, the whole predicament was somewhat amusing. Even if it meant giving up his dignity, pride, and self-esteem. But that smile that was lighting her face was becoming annoyingly contagious.

"I am really sorry," Sandry said again. "I swear that it was an accident." She giggled again, "I didn't mean for you to get hurt. Oh dear, you're not hurt, are you?" Despite the concern in her voice, her smile still on her face.

Briar looked at her, his lips tightly pursed together. He blew a piece of ebony hair out of his eyes, trying his best not to give into Sandry's infectious smile. The pursing of the lips was working fairly well for the moment.

"You are okay, aren't you?" Sandry asked again, obviously spooked at the silence that was reining over Briar. The tight lip face could be interrupted into anything from the viewpoint of any onlooker.

He glanced at Sandry and saw a sympathetic smile on her face. Briar hated sympathy. Especially from a girl. A girl NOBLE at that. Yet, Sandry's sympathetic smile seemed different. It was like. . .Briar shrugged; he didn't quite know. "Yeah, Yeah, I'm fine." He pulled himself up on his feet and brushed off his pants. "No thanks to you, however," He added with a bit of resent.

Sandry's smile went from sympathetic to annoyed in a second. "Well, at least I did apologize," She argued, putting her hands on her hips.

Briar simply snorted, a smug smile spreading across his face. "Yeah, real good that did." He brushed off his pants as he heard Sandry give off a rather annoyed huff. He simply chuckled in a gutturally way, before turning to her and saying, "So, you wanta give me that pass already?"

Sandry, already perturbed at the dismissal of her apology, frowned harder. "No," she said stubbornly before going onward, "and yes." She unlatched the gate and walked outside, "I'm going too. You can come if you want too." With that, she started to walk down the path in a passive way.

Briar watched her leave in disbelief. That female had something coming to her someday. Or so Briar concluded. But, he had little time to contemplate Sandry's overbearing stubbornness. Right then, she had disappeared over the hill and was walking away from view. And that meant the pass was too. Even though he had decided to go for a walk to get away from the girly atmosphere in Discipline, he was going to have to follow Sandry wherever she went. Perfect.

"Hey, wait a second!" Briar yelled to get Sandry's attention. She turned around and smiled smugly.

"Thought you'd be coming," She commented, a slight smile gracing her face. She waited until Briar managed to jog up next to her before she started to walk down the pathway.

Briar merely grumbled.

The pathway was lined with small crocuses, lilies, and daylillies which were dying in the evening. The bright yellow flowers were twisting and ready to snap from their stem so that a new flower could appear the next day. The moonlight was filtered by some of the sun's fading colors, even though the sun was out of view. There was a definite breeze, which was almost intoxicating.

Sandry, feeling a puff of breeze pass over her face, smiled and closed her eyes. Her hair was pushed back from the breeze and she giggled, "Sure is a nice breeze, huh?" She paused, waiting for an answer. She got only silence. "Briar?" She popped one eye open, looking to were Briar had been when they walking beside each other. "Briar? Where'd you go?" This time her voice was a bit impatient.

Suddenly: "I'm up here."

Sandry spun on her heel, jerking her head upward, looking for something. "Up where?" She asked to the air in front of her, frowning.

"I'm just above your head. On the oak tree." Briar watched amusedly, as Sandry looked upward at him. His legs were dangling over the edge of a rather large limb protruding from the oak tree's main stump. It wasn't that far off the ground, since, in the little while Briar had from Sandry's distracted attention, he couldn't climb that far off the ground.

Briar bobbed on the branch, only to feel the tree tremble underneath him. He jumped at the tree's reaction. Rosethorn had managed to explain --or lectured, however you wanted to put it-- just a small amount of what his powers could exactly do. Briar wasn't still used to it. That, however, didn't harbor any curiosity that was in his mind.

Reaching cautiously, Briar touched a leaf and, feeling his magic surge through him, watched as the whole tree trembled and the leaf grow three other leaves instantaneously. Alarmed, Briar drew back. Wow. Briar examined the leaf as he felt the whole tree still quiver in strange excitement. Sweat had gathered on his brow, and his whole body was shaking in a queer after affect.

"Hey!" someone cried from below him, "Try to keep your element under control there, Plant Mage."

Briar looked down before sighing. Were all females as annoying? Not including Daja and Tris; they were sitting pretty with Sandry on the annoying ladder.

"Yeah, sorry," He mumbled quietly before steadying the tree with him hand. The tree went still in a second. Briar blinked. He didn't know he could do that. Well, you learn something new every . . .

Then, suddenly, the tree quivered beneath him and he looked downward in shock. Briar wasn't thrilled at the idea of his magic getting out of hand. Then, a small head poked out of the small jungle of leaves.

"If you'll give me a hand," Sandry commanded through clenched teeth, obviously perturbed at the situation. The tree's leaves were surrounding her completely and sticking in her hair.

It really quite funny at the moment and Briar found it too amusing. He burst out into laughter before reaching down his hand towards her. "Can't you girls do anything?" He asked through breaks in his laughter. With a quick jerk, Sandry was with him on the tree limb, an annoyed look on her face.

"Yeah, real funny," She commented coldly, glaring at him through her eyelashes. "I'll have you know that I climbed a mean tree when I was just a toddler." Sandry, still glowering, picked a lime leaf out of her hair while Briar's laughter subsided into chuckles. "In fact, I was doing just fine until SOMEONE decided to make the tree into a forest." She jerked her head towards Briar, a strange fire in her eyes.

Briar quit his laughter and raised his arms in a surrender position. "Wasn't me," He started, trying his best to put a hurt, innocent face on, "must have been your imagination."

Her shoulders sagged from exasperation while she picked yet another leaf from her hair. "I just can't win, can I?"

Briar chuckled, "Nope." He put a hand on her shoulder and then said in mock sympathy, "But don't worry: You're losing to me. . . it's hard to win." Sandry rolled her eyes and Briar laughed.

"It's good to know you're a good sport about it," She remarked flatly before a smile spread across her lips. She turned to face Briar, her smile spread large against her face.

Briar stopped himself almost immediately and pulled his hand away from her shoulder as if burned. The sudden light mood that had atmosphered around them seemed almost spooky to him. Maybe it was just because she was a noble. People like him weren't supposed to like the presence of any aristocrat.

"Yeah, well. You know," He said non-chalantly, trying to sound uninterested.

Sandry, however, didn't quit smiling. Instead, she looked at the sky before stretching out and then, putting her knees to her chin, yawned. She reminded Briar of a kitten, her large watery eyes locked on the sky. They sat in silence for quite awhile, before, out of the blue, Sandry spoke:

"My heart was once a garden,
By dim, enchanted trees,
With hint of untouched violets
And shy anemones.

"I showed my love the garden
Where April dreams I'd hide,
But heedlessly he lost the key
And now-- we're both inside."

Briar had turned to look at her as she spoke, confused at first, then finding simple interest. When she was finished, Sandry paused, looking at the sky.

"My Nursemaid -Pirisi- used to say that to me every time we'd go for a walk in the gardens at night," She commented dreamily, her eyes on the stars. Then she turned to Briar, a distant smile on her face. "Sometimes I really miss the times before we came to discipline." She paused before asking Briar cautiously, "Do you?"

Briar was caught off-gaurd. He hadn't expected her to ask that. "Wha. . . what?"

"You know. . . do you ever miss the old days? Picking pockets, stealing stuff. . .you know," Sandry smiled at him. Smugly.

Briar caught the smugness. He snapped out of his aura, shaking his head. "As much as you'd probably like to think that I was as pampered as you, I wasn't. Sorry, milady. I didn't have parents. I didn't have nursemaids." He paused thoughtfully, "No, I don't really miss those days of crime. Sorry."

A short period of silence fell over them, before something unexpected happened.

Briar was leaning on the main limb, listlessly watching the stars. Then, out of the blue, Sandry leaned over and pressed her lips on his cheek, only lingering for a brief, fleeting second. Nevertheless, Briar shot out of his trance-like state and jerked his head up, a definite blush forming on his cheeks.

"Hey!" He exclaimed, looking at the now smiling Sandry, "What was that for?!"

Sandry, looking unaffected, simply smiled and shrugged. "I thought it was high time for you to have a bed-time kiss. No childhood is complete without it. Pirisi used to give me one every night" She chuckled at Briar's shocked face, "Don't worry, I haven't fallen desperately in love with you. . ." She paused for dramatic affect, ". . .yet."

Briar's eyes opened wide, "And what's that supposed to mean?"

Sandry shrugged mischievously before making a descent down from the tree, "I don't know. Maybe you should find out yourself." Then, with little more thought, she jumped to the ground and looked up at Briar.

Briar was beyond confusion, and his eyes were wide. He ran a nervous hand through his hair. "I don't do mushy, romance stuff," He called down to her before he made his climb downward also.

"Okay," Sandry called back, a hint of teasing in her voice.

Nearing the last branch, Briar jumped to the ground, landing in front of Sandry. He raised an eyebrow at her questionably before stammering, "You ARE joking." He paused before asking in a weak voice, "Aren't you?"

Sandry simply smiled mischievously.

And for some crazy reason, Briar smiled also. Darn. As much as he tried, he couldn't shake away the affects of Sandry's infectious smile. And now, he wasn't quite sure if you was starting to really like Sandry or he was ready to kill her. . .

"Race you to Discipline!" Sandry yelped before getting an unfair head start, running down the pathway back to the discipline cottage.

Briar watched her for a few brief seconds, before yelling after her, "Hey, no fair. Come back here. Come on, Sandry. Wait!"

And so it begins. . . .

Okay, there it is. Well, the first part. I'd appreciate any feedback. It's up to you if I continue or not. If I do continue, the next part will be up in about a week or so. Maybe sooner if I set myself to it. It will get more romantic later on. Right now, they're only, what? Ten, maybe? Anyways, "be a responsible reader and review..."
Also, I apologize for not putting Daja and Tris in there more. They'll be there later on. In fact, Tris becomes a major, MAJOR part of the plot. But that's for afterwards.