Summary:

What does Lee think about while in the brig? The first time he met Kara, of course. Author's spin on how they met…not based on canon.

SCATTERED

Lee sat alone in his cell; arms covered in blood, wrists still tethered, and wondered how the frak things could go so wrong so fast. He wasn't kidding when he told the President that he'd basically made a stand for nothing.

The closest thing he had to a friend was gone; he'd committed mutiny, his father could be dying and Colonel Tigh was in charge. Things were pretty frakked up all around.

The President was speaking to Billy in low tones about the jump they'd just made. Lee couldn't muster up much caring one way or the other. He was sitting on the edge of the cot in the cell, with his arms propped on his knees and his shoulders were starting to cramp from the restraints. He leaned back against the bars hoping to get comfortable and trying not to think about his father lying in sickbay waiting on Doc Cottle to come and work his magic.

His mind flashed back to CIC and watching Boomer put two rounds into his dad. Next, it moved to Colonial One and holding the gun to Tigh's head. Finally it landed on watching Kara jump away to Caprica, leaving them all behind on her quest to find the Arrow of Apollo for the President.

He focused his thoughts on Kara…it helped keep his worry at bay regarding the fate of his dad. Her leaving had affected him more than he'd wanted to admit. It bothered him that her last significant words to him were 'I'm sorry'. It would have been so simple to just accept her apology and go back to how things were before.

He'd been unable to do it.

All the anger he'd felt at figuring out that she'd slept with the smarmy Vice President was still working its way through his system. And the incredibly stupid part was…he'd had no right to be angry. None. Hindsight was both a blessing and a curse. He'd been jealous…something he couldn't admit to when he was tearing her apart on the hangar deck. Then he'd been hurt and angry that she'd thumbed her nose at protocol and took her plan for the Raider to Tigh, leaving him completely out of the loop. After confronting her and insulting her, he hadn't been expecting her apology and he was still so wrapped up in his own irrational sense of betrayal that he couldn't provide a simple act of forgiveness.

He sighed lightly. Things were never simple with Kara. Ever. Lee flipped over sideways lying down on his side to make his arms more comfortable and shuffled through his memories to the first time he'd met Kara.

He had been on leave and stopped by to visit with his brother who was going through flight school. Zak had been filling Lee's head with tales of his exploits and how, on a bet, he'd asked out his legendary flight instructor. Before Lee could chastise him, he continued his story about how they'd actually hit if off so much that he'd told her about the bet. She had responded by laughing her ass off and telling him she admired the brass ones it took for him to admit that to her.

Lee couldn't fathom how any woman would think it admirable for a guy to ask her out on a bet. But apparently Kara Thrace wasn't like most women. Zak had told him so many wild stories about their continued relationship that Lee was beginning to think his brother was frakking with him. From what Zak said, she could out drink, out fight, and out fly just about everyone. She played a wicked game of Triad, spent lots of time in the brig and, according to Zak, was a slice of heaven sent from the gods. His brother was obviously in love, so Lee chalked up the over-the-top description to his mental state, not actual fact.

He couldn't have been more shocked when he met her.

Lee shifted his position on the cot and grinned in spite of himself, remembering his reaction to Kara the first time he'd laid eyes on her. To say she'd completely knocked him for a loop would be an understatement. He let his mind fill with the image of how they'd first met.

He was late to meet Zak and his now committed girlfriend. Lee still wasn't quite sure what to expect from this Kara Thrace person. He had a very difficult time picturing his brother with the woman he'd been describing. He walked into his brother's favorite hangout just outside the academy campus. Scanning the room, he quickly spotted Zak sitting at a table in the far corner with a huge grin on his face watching the beginnings of an altercation by the billiards tables.

Zak hadn't noticed him, so he started toward the direction of the argument since he'd have to get past it to see his brother. As he got closer he started picking up snatches of the confrontation that had Zak enthralled.

"You're accusing me of cheating?"

It was a woman's voice, but Lee couldn't see her…there were three big guys blocking his view. He shrugged to himself and kept walking.

"Damn right, I am. Nobody can make that kind of shot and not be cheating."

This was coming from the big guy in the middle.

"I just did." Lee couldn't make out the next part because the woman's voice dropped low. He did hear the next part from the guy again.

"I'd like to see you try."

Lee had almost made it past them. He was right behind the center guy when he noticed him duck down. He had no time to react when a fist shot out and caught him on the cheek, just below his left eye. He could feel the sting and burn from the solid connection as his head snapped back and his arm instinctively drew back and swung forward just as the guy who'd ducked was standing back up. Lee's fist caught him under the chin and the big lug was flung backwards toward the woman who was standing there. She neatly sidestepped and watched the large man fall.

She looked up at Lee then down at the guy lying on the floor. "Well frak." Then she got a look at Lee's swelling cheekbone. "Damn…sorry about that." As she stepped up onto the lump on the floor then off again as she eyed his two friends and nodded down at the heap. "I'd get him out of here, if I were you." She put her hands on her hips and continued. "I won't miss next time."

While she'd been speaking, Lee's hand had traveled up to his cheek and he winced when his fingers came into contact with the broken skin coming away with droplets of blood on his fingertips. He felt a hand on his shoulder and reflexively started to cock his arm back again…until he heard a voice in his ear.

"Lee." Zak stepped around him and stood beside the woman. He grimaced when he caught the damage on Lee's face. "Couldn't have picked a more interesting way for you to meet Kara." He put his arm around the blonde spitfire and drew her close to him. "You two okay?" He looked from one to the other as the silence stretched a little awkwardly.

Too many thoughts went ripping through Lee's head when he realized he'd nearly been laid low by the woman his brother never shut up about. All of Zak's stories came back to him in force…every one of them was true. Lee had no doubt about that now. She was nothing like he'd pictured her. Almost pixie short blonde hair, a beautiful pair of eyes that were frankly assessing him at the moment and a compact frame that looked sleek and curvy all at the same time.

Lee blinked his eyes to make sure he was seeing things correctly. Zak was looking at him expectantly and the woman he now knew as Kara gave him a smirk that pissed him off and made him want to laugh at the same time. He stuck out his non-blood marked hand. "Lee Adama." Her grip was firm and warm when she shook his hand.

Kara was both amused and mortified that she'd just punched the brother of the guy she was going out with. She almost always went with the humor so she said. "Sorry about marking that pretty face of yours." She strode over to the bar and grabbed a napkin, dabbed it in water, stalked back over and gently dabbed at the clotted area on Lee's face.

Lee wasn't expecting the gentle touch…she looked so hard around the edges. He felt as if he were drowning in the sheer force of her presence. He grasped her wrist and took the napkin from her. "Uh…thanks. I can get it from here." She shrugged her shoulders and stepped back.

Zak caught her hand and they ambled toward the table he'd vacated. Lee sat down across from them and tried to wrap his mind around everything that had happened since he'd walked into the bar. His brother had sat and watched while his girlfriend went up against three guys…all bigger than she was…Lee couldn't fathom it and he told Zak so.

Kara had jumped in and asked if it looked like she needed help. Lee wasn't sure how to answer…between the steady throb in his cheek and her aggressive posture he was completely thrown. She said what was on her mind and made no apologies for it. As the evening wore on, he watched their interaction and knew his brother was completely smitten with her.

As for himself, he found that he was both drawn to and repelled by Kara Thrace. She was like no other woman he'd ever met. Definitely not his type, but she seemed to suit Zak. Lee had never seen him so relaxed and happy. In the big picture…that's all that mattered to Lee.

He spent the next couple of leaves with them and developed an easy, if somewhat antagonistic, friendship with Kara. She instinctively knew what buttons to push to get a reaction out of him. He made it his business to learn hers. Rarely did they make it through one of his visits without having a major debate over something. She always, always took counterpoint to his point…even if she agreed with him. Lee found that to be frustrating and exhilarating at the same time.

She was a walking paradox…and definitely not his type. So why did he find himself thinking about her at the oddest moments? Even with his preference for blondes, he couldn't be attracted to her. So why was her image the one he saw every time he sought physical release from a long day of classes and test flights? Alone in his bunk or the shower or the head…it didn't matter where it was…visions of Kara filled his head with exquisite detail. Writhing beneath him, slowly riding over him, on her knees in front of him…every single time, it happened…and every single time, Lee would tell himself never again.

It didn't work and he was wracked with guilt. Finally, he gave up the ghost and just decided that until he had time to go out and meet someone of his own, he'd have to live with having his brother's fiancé as the object of his fantasies. It didn't sit well with him, but he couldn't seem to shake it. As long as he never let Zak know, he'd do his best to live with it.

When Zak called to tell him they were engaged, he was truly happy for his brother. Maybe now he could put the thoughts of her out of his mind. She really wasn't what he wanted, even if she did fill his thoughts. He had to just be jealous of his little brother finding the person and the life he wanted before he did. At least that's what Lee told himself.

Then Zak had died and all thoughts of Kara fled. He was too wrapped in pain, betrayal and bitterness to spare her a thought. He'd unleashed his anger on his father for putting Zak in the position to get killed and he hadn't looked back since. All his thoughts were focused on carving a niche for himself in the military and making a name for himself, so he could walk away from it. All of it…unlike his father.

Lee shifted uncomfortably on the cot. His arms were beginning to tingle and he knew he was going to lose feeling in them soon. He drifted back to receiving his papers to report to the Galactica for it's decommissioning ceremony. That was the very first time he'd considered bucking orders. He didn't want to attend…didn't want to see his father. The only thing that had stopped him was the chance to see Kara. He'd known she was aboard and he hadn't seen her since the funeral.

He'd seen her all right…in the brig. He'd mucked things up and as usual she'd taken counterpoint. Then after he returned from escorting what was left of the fleet to Ragnor he'd thought for a moment that she'd felt what he felt. When she'd dropped her confession on him about Zak, he'd taken a big step back from his feelings. The reminder of Zak was so potent that all his former guilt came back to haunt him and he held himself back from pursuing anything with her.

She was a constant source of frustration and salvation, frustration because she always flouted his authority and salvation because she was his only friend. When they'd almost lost her, Lee didn't take the time to analyze why he been unwilling to give up the search for her. He just knew that he was relieved when she came back to them and they'd grown steadily closer since then. They still pushed each other's buttons, and she was still a pain in the ass, but underneath that was a level of respect that grew more with each passing day.

On Colonial Day, at the celebration for Dr. Baltar's ascent to the Vice Presidency, he'd been blown away when he'd seen her in that blue dress. They'd danced together and the feel of her in his arms was so right, so real that he'd almost asked her for more. What he'd thought was a timely interruption by the Vice President gave him time to pull himself back from the line he'd almost crossed. He had thought he should approach things more slowly…turned out he had been wrong.

Everything had gone steadily downhill since then. And here he was…sitting in a cell with his father's blood slowly drying on his arms. If he had it to do over again…he would have at least accepted her apology. As it stood now…he may never see her again and she'd left feeling he thought she was below contempt.

The hatch swung open and Colonel Tigh entered the brig. He told the guard to open his cell door.

Lee slowly got to his feet and stood before the Colonel, hoping there was news about his dad's condition.

Tigh just scowled at Lee. "Captain. We've got a situation and I'm going to need every single pilot this ship's got." He quickly filled Lee in on the planned jump back to their previous coordinates. "I need your parole." Tigh eyed him speculatively. He was willing to put aside the fact that Lee had held a gun to his head to get back to the fleet. He nodded to the marine guard and had him release Lee's arms from the tethers.

Lee took a moment to think. Tigh in command couldn't be a good thing, but his father needed Doc Cottle's expertise. Lee thought of Kara jumping away to Caprica on a fool's mission to retrieve something that may or may not help them find Earth. He made his decision, foolish though it may be. "All right." He rubbed at his wrists to work the feeling back into them. "You have my parole…"

FIN