Cry Me Tears of Chocolate

by sErenity and Charli

Kandace "Kandi" Sugarmallow stared longingly out her bedroom window at the great looming chocolate factory in the center of London. She sighed, pushing a strand of shimhmering chocolate-brown hair out of her chocolate-brown eyes. She wiped her flawless porcelain skin on her new silk shirt. The shirt was a pale periwinkle blue, framing her delicate and slender figure. despite being so thin, she still had all the right curves in all the right places. Her stokmach was toned and lean, and her legs long and smooth. She had on silver eye shadow, mascara, foundation, eyeliner, blush, and lipstick.

The winter of London was so much colder than the winter in Los Angeles. She had just moved 2 london from los angeles 3 months ago. Her parents had been killed in a car accident 2 months ago, and Kandi had been sent 2 live w/ her aunt and uncle in London.

Once more Kandi sighed at the image of the factory. Ever since that Charlie boy had gotten killed in a freak Jello-mold accident, Mr. Willy Wonka had reinstated his Goldnticket game. 5 more tickets had been sent out all over the world, w/ Mr. Wonka desperately searching for another hair 2 take over his chocolate factory. Kandi could only guess, but she guessed that the death of Charlie had made Willy Wonka very depressed. She wished she could have been able 2 comfort him.

Kandi had heard many things about the mysterious chocolatier. Some said that nobody, save the five children from the ormiginal Goldnticket game and their guardians, had ever been in or out of the factory since its temporary closure all those years ago, and tvhat he was hoping 2 find a new companion. Kandi sighed heavily. She'd also heard that this mysterious Wonka was a beautiful, if eccentric, genius of a man.

Oh, what I wouldn't give for a glimpse of the wonderful Willy Wonka! she wangsted. These two months have been far 2 much for a young, available girl such as myself 2 bear. And indeed, Kandi's loneliness had been her only companion for the past two unbearable months. A single crystalline tear fell from the deep chocolate of her sparkling eyes, landing softly on her silkenxv shirt like a sweet note from a piano.,

Oh damn, thought Kandi, this shirt is dry clean only.

"Kandi?" a voice from deep w/in the house called 2 her.

"Yes, Auntie Gretchen?"

"We're going for a walk, would u like 2 accompany us?"

Kandi brightened instantly. A walk would be delightful! They usually passed by the amazing chocolate factory. Kandi loved seeing the chocolate factoryj. The smoke smelled of chocolate and marshmallows, and xit helped ease her mind of the emotional 2rment in her heart, which we will only bring up when the subject is most convenient for wangsting.

"Yes, I would!"

Since four of the five Goldntickets had already been found, and since we feel no need 2 actually tell the s2ry there, we'll just say that saying that there's only one left DEFINITELY increases the tension like whoa.

"Wonderful, Kandi! And we can get u a candy bar on thne way home if u want."

"Oh, whats the point?" Kandi sighed. "I'll never be the one 2 find a Goldnticket. It doesn't matter."

But little did Kandi know that this walk was 2 be the most fateful walk she'd ever walked.

Good Morning, Sunshine! The earth says, "Hiya!" (A/N: This is how we're going 2 switch scenes, okay? Lol! We don't really need transitions. Those are boring.)

The chilled winter air kissed roses in2 the pale porcelain of Kandi's cheeks, the delicate snowflakes twirling slowly arounjd her enchanting figure like puffs of sweet powdered sugar. Her sugar pink lips puckered slightly as she kissed a snowflake, the intricate ice crystals melting from the heat emanating from them. Men and women she passed by stared, enraptured by her stunning beauty. She didn't mind their attention; she was used 2 it.

(A/N: Her aunt is still here, but who cares? she SUX0RZ LOLLOLOL!)

She stopped at a tiny store, opening the door as a bell twinkled quietly over her head. The wind rushed in from behind her, bnlowing the snow in swirling trails, her soft, chocolate hair billlowing around her perfectly symmetrical face. The cashier and customers all stopped in their business, gazing at the vision of Kandi in wonder. What an amazing girl!

"May I help u, miss?" asked the store clerk, who was entirely 2 boring 2 describe. He was staring at Kandi's doll-like featueres blankly.

"Yes, I would like a Wonka chocolate bar, please." The sound of Kandi's voice seemed 2 make every person in the tiny store blush. How quaint, thought Kandi. The boring man handed Kandi a Schrunmdiddflyumptyious Bar, which she though was rather a suitably extravagant name, and Kandi delved in2 her purse for 200 pounds. (A/N: Pounds are British money! So this is like 200 cents, or two dollars! Isn't that fun?)

But, oh! Kandi felt her sweet, kind heart sinking when she found nothing there but her silver eye shadow, mascara, foundation, eyeliner, blush, and lipstick. She dressed nicely and had high quality make-up, but was actually terribly poor and very depressed. Her natural beauty covered the truth of her internal sorrow. What would she do? Oh, the wangst!

"On theh house," said the boring old man, sensing her inner turmoil. She could see a small sweat breaking out on his face as he stared at her unabashedly. She chose 2 ignore this.

"Oh, thank u so much!" Kandi smiled siweetly. Her smile was so brilliant, the entire room seemed aglow, w/ her glimmering teeth lighting the way. customers thoroughly blinded, Kandi and her aunt, who was in fact still there, excited the store happy.

"Why don't u open it, darling?" her aunt whispered softly, a little excited.

"Oh Auntie, don't get excited," Kandi sighed, absentminkdedly picking at the wrapper of the bar, "I'm not going 2 find a ticket, we both know that. I only wanted the candy."

"Candy for my Kandi." (A/N: Isn't that like the BEST joke ever? LOLOLOLOLOLOL) Her aunt smiled, though her eyebrows drooped in evident sadness of her beautiful niece's disheartenment. She couldn't stand 2 see the poor creature this depressed.

Kandi opened the bar, her eyes still fixated upon the large and looming factory a couple blocks down. All of a sudden, she could hear her aunt screaming and jumping up and down. Concern flooded Kandi's body, and she whirled upon her aunt.

"Auntie! Auntie! What's wrong?" She shouted, diamond tears sparkling in her crystal chocolate eyes.

"Nothing's wrong, my dear child! Look! Look! U've won the last Goldnticket!" Her aunt shrieked w/ glee like a goat having an orgasm. Kandi's eyes went wide. Whether at the statement or the metaphor, we're not sure.

"What are u talking about, Auntie? Uv gone mad!" Kandi gasped.

"No, child, no! Look!" Her aunt snatched a shining object from the candy bar and waved it in front of her face.

"Oh Auntie, ur being silly. It's a wonderful joke," good-natured Kandi laughed, "But 2 think. Me finding the last Goldnticket. It's absolutely ludicrous. It will never happen."

"But is has! Why won't u believe me?"

"Bcuz... bcuz I can't! I'm 2 plain, 2 average, 2 normal 2 win a Goldnticket, Auntie! Sure, I may have a flawless face and body and skin and soul and hair, but I'll never find a Goldnticket!"

"Dear child, look! The ticket is right here, before u!"

"Don't be ludicrus, Auntie!"

"I'm serious! It's real!"

"How absurd."

"LOOK AT THE TICKET BITCH." And w/ that final scathing remark, Kandi's Auntie shoved the ticket in her young niece's perfect face, leaving a horrible, burning PAPERCUT upon her otherwise flawless countenance. LYK OMG! Kandi started 2 sob in pain, snatching the gleaming golden paper from her Aunt and fleeing in fear for her life!

Good Morning, Sunshine! The earth says, "Hiya!"

Kandi's breath was coming in ragged leaps as she finally rested in an alleyway near her new London home, clutching the golden slip of paper 2 her ample, heaving bosom. Her darling Auntie had suddenly gone berserk! Kandi felt the horrible wound on her face w/ her smooth, trimmed, and manicured nails. They were powder blue. Oh, her beautiful face! Now she was alone, poor, beautiful, and horribly scarred. Who could possibly love her now?

she glanced at the ticket hopefully, forgetting that just moments ago she had abandoned her Aunt after accusing her of lying about it it was golden. And there was a bunch of stuff that Wonka said but I forget.

OMG! thought Kandi! I can go 2 Willy Wonka's amazing factory and meet him! Maybe then someone will be able 2 understand me for who I truly am... Kandi Sugarmallow! Surely Mr. Wonka understud the anguish of being beautiful, popular, and alone, scarred by tragedies and paper cuts.

She had decided. She would go 2 Wonka's factory on the date directed by the ticket, which was conveniently 2morrow! How lucky!

Quickly she scampered home and entered her room via the handy vine perched right outside her window. She locked her door and fell asleep.

Good Morning, Sunshine! The earth says, "Hiya!"

Morning came quickly, and Kandi jumped out of bed. It was the big day! Quickly she jumped in2 the shower and scrubbed herself down w/ cotton-candy-scented soap and shampoo. (Made by Wonka himself) sh e got out n dried off her hair w/ a blodryer and it was all shiney and sleek and not frizzy r fluffy LOL! then sh e put on her eyeliner and foundation and mascara and perfume and blush and eyeshadow and lipstick unil she loked PREFECT1 then she put on her tank top and jeans that were very sexxy and hoped out the window. her aunt would never kno, hehe.

she had her ticket n she ran to the gates of the chocofac (heehee, thats wut im gonna call it now) she wuz just in tiem! the gates opned and a voice said "cum forward" (A/N: LOLOLOLOLOLOL) then the gates closed and th puppets sung a song. it really waznt interstng so she didnt pay attention.

suddenly ther was a man next to her clapping. she waz confused. when did he get there? he was really hot (A/N: OMG ISNT HE?)

"oh that wuz marvelous" clapped the man.

"whore you?" a random kid asked.

"im willy wonak!" johnny depp replied, andkandi could feel herself swoon. he wuz so hott! he wuz so hott she culdnt say anythin.

"Good Morning, Sunshine! The Earth Says "Hiya!"" sed willy. kandi felt herself blush.

"hello, earth! this is starshine! goor morning!" she giggled back, and blushed again when willy SMILED AT HER OMG!

they felt a sparks running in between of them and he new sh wuz spescial! how clevr she waz!

"that wa wierd" said varuka salt but nobody csared. she's was stupud lol.

they walke dinside. they toom off their coats/ amd it was hot inside. willy walke dover to kandi and took her coat for her! it was really romantic and she almost fainted! she like willy aready they all intorduced themselves and when he got to her he had a expression of joy on his face.

"who are you my lvoely lady?" he asked her with a velvety tone. she swooned.

"my name is kandace sugermallow but u can call me kandi" she said.

"u r swete my dear jsut like kando hee hee hee: he was so cute and nice! they laughed a lot. and then they walked towad the room full of candy! the room suddenly got slmaller! and he unlocked the foor and it was like a rainbow of conftecticonaryies!

eND CHANPTER oNE LOL!

IT'S A CLIFFHANGER OMG WHAT;S GONNA HAPPEN?

I HOPE U LIKE THE FIRST CHAPTER PLZ REVIEW! AND DON'T FLAME US OR WELL SICK OUR OUMPAH LOOHMAPA!S ON U! HHAHA THEIR RABID AND RHEY BITE RELLE HARD! SO DONT FLAME!

It got kidna rouch near the end but we were in a hurry we wante ti post t really soon! So hope u like ti! Plz tell us!.