OMG, I have no excuse. At all. Except that I have been soooooo busy with camp, and starting school, and being lazy. AND HOMFG READ HP 7 AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!! No spoilers here, but I will hopefuly be doing a sequel (very short, 100 ways) about after HP 7. Those eho know what I'm talking about... hehehehe... Luna tried to steal HP over the summer, but since she was at camp... mission not good. Oh, and THIS IS THE LAST CHAPPIE!!!! I HOPE YOU LUUUUUUUUUV IT!!!!!!!

DISCLAIMER: Luna loves you all, and gives you chocolate. (Lawyers cough) andidontownhp HAPPY NOW??? Dear god, I hate those guys... See you at the bottom!!!

Give him a tattoo

…Of a pink unicorn

…And a rainbow

…And other girly stuff

…That dances around to the Barbie Girl song

…In a recording of his voice

…Put it on his ass

…Or bicep

…Or nose

…AND over his Dark Marl

Tell him it's the new dark mark and he has to keep it on

…Forever

…Blame Draco

Ask him if he has an allergic reaction to peanut butter

...Replace all potion ingredients with peanut butter

...Even if he isn't allergic

...Send him jars of peanut butter

...With suggestive notes on how to use it

...None of which have to do with eating

...Of any sort

Ask him if it helped with his pregnancy

…Of Harry

…Or Draco

…Or Voldy

...Or if it improved his weight

Tell him he's overweight

...Send him a Weight Watchers brochure

...And sign him up for Jenny Crag

Send him a treadmill

...For Christmas

...And every Saturday

…Ask him if he does yoga

...If not, tell him that lessons start on Monday

...If so, slap him and say: "WHY ISN'T IT WORKING?"

…Loudly

...Start screaming: "RAPE!!" every time your alone with him

...Loudly

...Ask him how babies are born

...Ask him WHY babies are born

...When he doesn't answer, ask him if he's ever had, "The Talk"

...Give him the talk before he answers

…Detailed

...If he interrupts say "Great, now we have to start over!!!"

…Loudly

...Give him the talk in the halls

...Or dinner

...Or classroom

...Especially when he's teaching

…Your class

...Encourage others to do the same

...Especially Peeves

Get some one to tattoo his entire body

…With ponies

…And rainbows

…And the Dark Mark

Go into Snape's room and put a numbing charm and pierce his entire face

Put a sticking charm on it

Dye his hair pink

...Permanently

Put a spell on him that makes his canines fangs

...Permanently

…And take pictures

Spread a rumor that he's in love with Malfoy

Make ALL his clothes pink

With Barbie on them

...So it's permanent

Shave "I'M GAY" on his head

...Make it so the shaved hair won't grow back

Charm grey hairs into his hair and tell him he's getting old –loudly

Send him black dye to get rid of said hairs

…During class

…Or the great hall

…Or randomly throughout the day

Tell him you invite his mother to school for dinner

…Tell him she's bringing baby pictures

Ask if he had greasy air as a child

…Or if he's trying to make a fashion statement

…Without waiting, tell him he's failing miserably

Ask if he's ever had lice

…Without waiting for an answer respond "oh of course not, duh, lice can't stand greasy hair"

…Walk away as if nothing happened

Get a journal and write his name on it and write about him having a crush on James

Show it to everyone but him

Release hundreds of lightning bugs in the dungeon

…Tell everyone they are an endangered type of pixie/fairy

Sign him up for girl magazines

Make sure they are delivered in public

Give him flowers that he is allergic to before class

...So much that it FILLS his classroom

...Shout "delivery" at the top of your lungs when he opens the door and is swamped by them

...Give Voldie a love potion and make HIM the extremely horny ferret

Have Snape get turned into Barney

Dress Snape as a vampire and transfigure all his drinks into blood

…Give him a basket of blood-flavored lollipops

Write incredibly long stories about him make sure they involve him and Voldiein some perverted way

…Or him and Wormtail

Charm a bunch of Quills that sing "I know a song that gets on everybody's nerves" and follow him around

…Make sure they multiply if he tries to get rid of them

Paint all of his cauldrons pink

Aaaannnnnndddd...

DO ALL OF THESE THINGS IN ONE DAAAAAAAAY!!!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH STORY DONE!!!! WOOOOHOOOO w00000000000000t!!!!!!! YAAAAAAAAAAAY YIPEEEEEEEEEEEE etc.!!!!!!

ahem.

So, I'd just like to give chocolate to EVERYONE who reveiwed, sent me ways, or bailed me out of jail. I love you all, and can't wait to see you soon!!!!!!!!

Luv, (omfg, last time sniff)

Luna the Loving :D:D:D:D:D:D:D