Underneath it All

A/N: I'd appreciate any constructive critism, or anything that will motivate me to get the next chapter of this written faster. One last warning. If you are a fan of Piz/Veronica, DO NOT READ THIS!!! And if you are a lover of LoVe, like me, you should read this. This prologue may seem like a Piz/Veronica story, but the next chapter has a twist...

Disclaimer: I don't own Veronica Mars, if I did it wouldn't be as good, and Logan and Veronica would be together forever.

Ok, on to the story.

Prologue

Dear Diary, it's Veronica.

Dear Diary? What the hell, how old am I, seven? Ok let's try this again.

Dear Journal. I promise that will be the only time I say that. This is going to be less of a journal and more of hand written blog that only I will see. No I'm not going to post it on my myspace, or livejournal. That would be lame, and frankly I have better things to do than worry about random stalkers reading about my personal life. Because that is what this is going to be about. My personal life. I promise it won't be some mindless gibberish like, "Oh, Bobby looked at me in class today, what do you think it means?!?" Nope, sorry, I got past that stage a while ago. It was probably when Lily found my first diary…

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"What's this Veronica?" shrieked Lily, "Little Veronica Mars keeps a diary; I wonder what it says."

"Lily, NO!!!" shouted Veronica. She didn't want Lily to know what she had written, about a certain someone.

"God Veronica, like I'd tell anyone what you wrote. Remember I'm your fabulous best friend, and that entitles me to diary reading privileges. I probably don't want to read all your naughty thoughts about my brother anyways, so let's just put this away." Lily said as she placed the diary back in the shoebox that Veronica kept on the top shelf in her closet. She knew that Veronica kept all her secrets in there, but Veronica was too naïve to know that she knew.

Veronica breathed an audible sigh of relief.

"On second thought, it seems like innocent little Veronica Mars has something truly naughty in here, if she is that worried about me reading it. What is it Veronica, did Duncan's hand move a little too far north on that perfect little thigh of yours." Lily concluded, as she opened the diary and began scanning the pages.

"No…Lily, it's nothing like that," said Veronica blushing, "just don't read it." But she didn't really fight too hard; she knew it was no use battling the fabulous Lily Kane.

"Too late, Ver-on-i-ca," said Lily pronunciating each syllable, "Lily knows all your secrets now."

"Even the one…"

"Yes, even that one, I especially liked the entry from, what was it, ah, two days ago, April 12th. 'Ever since Logan and Lily broke up yesterday, Logan has seemed so sad, and all I want to do is hug him to make him feel better. Does this mean I like him? I feel bad that Lily broke his heart again and every time I see him look so depressed, it makes me want to yell at Lily for being such a bad girlfriend. Does me wanting to stand up to her for him, mean I think of Logan as more than a friend? Whenever I see him now, I can't help but notice how attractive he is; I can't believe I didn't notice it before. Have his eyes always been so deep and dark and…sexy. Oh my god, I can't believe I just said sexy! I'm blushing just thinking about it. If Lily heard me she would be soooooo proud…'

Yes, Veronica, Lily is very proud, it seems I've taught you well, especially on the art of stealing one's boyfriend." said Lily angrily.

Veronica had never seen Lily this angry. Well she had, but it had never been directed at her before. "Lily," she began, "I wasn't going to steal him from you, I just…I never…I was just…I wrote it to…"

"Save it for someone who cares Veronica," said Lily coldly, "because right now, you and I are over. Done. We are finished, and don't you ever call me or talk to me again."

Lily stormed out of Veronica's room and Veronica knew better than to go after her. Lily did this all the time, it may never have been directed at Veronica herself before, but Veronica knew that she got over this stuff really quickly. Lily was a drama queen, she always was, she always would be.

They were talking the next day.

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Ever since then, I never did the "does he like me" thing. I guess I figured if he was a guy worth dating he would tell me if he liked me and would ask me out, plus I always had Duncan to be there for me. God, I was so naïve back then. I actually cringe with embarrassment whenever I think of the way I was; the way I followed Lily around like some sort of lost puppy. I was her dress up doll, I realize that now, and even if I had known back then, I probably still wouldn't have changed anything. Lily taught me so much, and even though she didn't really teach me anything truly valuable – yes she taught me about boys and kissing and sex – but in the end, after she died, she continued teaching me so much more about myself, and how to be my own person, just like she had always been.

I'm tearing up just thinking about Lily, so why don't I get to the point of this diary.

This diary is to insinuate some sense of normalcy in my life.

I am done with Logan, and I am now dating Piz. He is the epitome of normal; he has no weird history, his dad wasn't abusive and didn't lock me in a fridge to burn me alive or have an affair with and try to kill my best friend. His dad didn't have an affair with my mother. His mother didn't commit suicide. He is kind of like Duncan when we were dating in the beginning, before the weird disease and all. He is shy and adorable, and he makes me feel like he is honoured to be with me. He makes me feel like my life could finally return to how it was like before Lily died, except with me being tougher, better dressed, and with an amazing talent for getting into trouble, if I do say so myself.

When he first asked me out, it was only a month after Logan and I broke up, I wasn't fully ready to move on, but he said we could just go to a movie as friends and see where it lead to. It seemed to lead to a pretty lengthy make-out session in his and Wallace's dorm room. Since then we have been officially a couple.

I see Logan occasionally but it doesn't make me feel the way it used to. I don't get all sweaty palmed around him, and my heart doesn't beat 10 times faster when I see him, like I did before. It could be the fact that I'm with Piz and he is with Parker, but I think we have finally gotten over each other. I admit that I will always hold a soft spot in my heart for him. I will always love him, I don't think there is any way to stop that but, we have both moved on so we might as well be mature when we do have to be around each other. Which hopefully isn't too often after this Friday.

Oh, didn't I mention. Logan, Parker, Piz and I are going on a double date this Friday. I blame Parker and Piz, and their normal lives, not knowing when enough is enough.

Normal, friendly, conversation with Logan Echolls. Yes, this shouldn't be awkward at all.

Until then. This is Veronica Mars, signing out.

A/N: Ok, kind of a little cliff hanger there. Review please, it will motivate me to write faster.