So everything had gone as planned. Yes, it was his plan. The moment Haruhi entered the Third Music Room by mistake he saw in that moment, not a mistake, but an opportunity.

He was not going to be here for Tamaki for much longer, and he knew his friend would not survive a day in this world if alone. He would not be here to take care of his loved one for long so when he saw Haruhi enter the Third Music Room he realized she could be the answer, she was the exact kind of person he liked. Different, he liked everything he did not know, he liked to discover new things, and she was the answer.

So when she broke that vase he was more than glad. There was a reason to keep her with them for at least a year and soon Tamaki would like her. It was obvious that she would like him too no matter how much she complained.

Of course it hurt to see them together in their little "moments" but it was for the best. This way Tamaki would have someone to look after him after Kyouya was gone.

And when Haruhi got Tamaki back it was obvious that they loved each other and that they would finally be happy.

So after that moment it seemed like his body had given up fighting against what was eating him alive the past two years. Dizziness, nausea, severe cough attacks and throwing up were turning to be more frequently than Kyouya expected and it was becoming difficult for him to hide it from everyone.

Like now.

He was typing on his notebook and suddenly everything started to spin in front of him. He closed the notebook and his eyes trying to calm down, breathe and continue to be awake.

But it was turning out to be really difficult especially with Tamaki blabbering something about the twins.

Tamaki continued complaining about the devilish twins putting their hand on his "daughter" until he saw Kyouya stand up with his eyes closed, breathing hard, supporting himself on the table beside him where his notebook was shut.

"Kyouya…what's wrong?" Tamaki asked and his friend opened his eyes, looked at him and shut them again, seeming to be in pain.

"I am just having some difficulty breathing Tamaki…it must be just a flu." Kyouya said in a tired voice but Tamaki did not believe him, he seemed to be making a lot of effort to remain standing. Not only that he had begun coughing and his face was turning purple.

"Kyouya that is not it, let me take you to the school nurse…" Tamaki said approaching his friend, a hand on his shoulder. The attention of the whole Host Club was on them.

"Tamaki –cough- I said I –cough- am fi…"But he never finished the sentence, his mouth shut, his hand slipped and if Tamaki wasn't by his side he would have fallen. Tamaki sat on the floor Kyouya on his lap. Kyouya had just fainted. Kyouya fainted…

"KYOUYA! Kyouya wake up!" He said shaking the unconscious body on his lap but Kyouya did not open his eyes, tears came to Tamaki "SOMEBODY CALL THE HOSPITAL! NOW!" He screamed and cried, trying to wake up his friend.

Tamaki went in the ambulance with Kyouya holding his friends hand, praying for the first time. He had no idea why his friend was like this but it must have been bad. Kyouya would never show so much weakness in front of anyone.

All of the Hosts were there, one consoling the other, some princesses were there as well. Tamaki's father was standing by the door a worried look on his eyes, Kyouya's dad was beside Tamaki's his face showed suppressed pain. Tamaki knew he was trying to appear indifferent but that the possibility of something bad happening to Kyouya was like death for him.

So when the doctor got out of the room where Kyouya was, everyone stood up and waited for the – hopefully good – news. But the look on the doctor's face whatever was going on with Kyouya was far from good.

"Hi, I am doctor James Thompson and I work on the oncology section of this hospital and-" But he couldn't continue, Tamaki, hearing the word oncology interrupted him.

"Oncology? There must be something wrong, Kyouya does not have cancer." He said shaking his head. The doctor looked down and sighed, then looked back up at all of them.
"I am afraid…he does. We ran some tests and found that your son has lung cancer." He said turning to Kyouya's father. "And unfortunately it is on a very advanced level, if he had treated earlier maybe we would have a chance against the disease but it has spread already, I am afraid he doesn't have a whole lot of time anymore. He is stabilized and you can go see him now if you want." He said. His Japanese was bad which meant he must be good, a foreign doctor, but if he was good why was he saying those things?
"No…you must be mistaken there must still be something you can do to save him!" Tamaki said, panicking. Kyouya's father had sat down and was facing the wall, everyone had started crying and some where giving him sympathetic looks.

"Unfortunately there is nothing I can do at this point." He said with a pity look on his eyes.

"No…no…no it can't be true Kyouya can't Kyouya won't…" Tamaki started mumbling and feel to his knees, crying. Suddenly a person appeared on the corridor saying.
"Kyouya can't what Tamaki?" He asked with a weak voice, a nurse beside him in case anything happened, he was not wearing the usual hospital outfit, he was wearing blue pajamas, and he could since his father owned the hospital. Tamaki looked up at him and tried to get up to hold him but tripped and ended up on his knees holding Kyouya's waist.

"Why didn't you get treatment? Why did you let it kill you? Why are you leaving me Kyouya?" He said between sobs, Kyouya wasn't wearing his glasses as he looked down at his friend, eyes soft, a gentle smile on his lips, and one hand slowly stroking Tamaki's hair.

"Why don't we go inside the room where I am supposed to stay and I will tell you why." He said softly, Tamaki lifting his head to see Kyouya. Kyouya could break just by seeing those tearful eyes looking up at him but he knew this moment would come some day.

They both entered the hospital room, Kyouya sat on the bed, Tamaki followed hugging his friend's waist, burying his face on the crook of Kyouya's neck.

"No, no there must be a way…to save you, Kyouya please…" He said sobbing non-stop tears flooding his eyes.

"There isn't Tamaki…nothing can save me anymore." He said and Tamaki looked up at him in confusion.

"You mean there was a way of saving you before?" He asked, Kyouya sighed and nodded.

"Then why didn't you do something? Tell someone? Why did you give up, you never give up!" Tamaki had stood up and was walking in circles, mad at Kyouya for not doing anything. Kyouya was getting tired from watching his friend walk, he sighed, and he would have to explain.

"Why would I do something? Why would I want to live the life that is arranged for me? I already did what I was supposed to. I already beat my brother's in everything, I proved I am worth to my father, I…don't have anything left to do here Tamaki." Kyouya said staring at his best friend in his eyes trying to make him understand the misery that would be his life.

"Nothing left? What am I to you? Nothing! What about the time we spent together? The Host Club? Is all of this nothing to you?" Tamaki almost yelled, anger in his eyes. He did not understand.

Kyouya stood up and held Tamaki's face in his hands, making Tamaki face him, look into his eyes and see the pain.

"Tamaki…you are going to marry Haruhi, you won't have to fight to raise your position in your father's company, and you will live happily ever after beside someone you love and that loves you back. I will live beside someone I don't love, someone that doesn't love me, always fighting to be the best, never gaining recognition for what I do. I will live only for the money since I will never know what friendship or love is once you go back to France to live your happy life. Do you understand why I never did anything now Tamaki?" Kyouya said, voice cracking, eyes watering up. He had never expressed his feelings, never said what was in his mind like now.

Tamaki seemed to have finally understood. He wasn't sobbing anymore just silently crying, his eyes were wide, he had never thought about the future, he had never realized the life his friend was going to live.

Kyouya sat back on the bed, he had headache now. Tamaki sat beside him and held his hand staring at it.

"You should have told me…Kyouya if me leaving Japan was the problem then I would never leave your side! I would stay in Japan if that would have made you change your mind!" He said, his voice was back normal but he was still crying and sobbing occasionally. Kyouya chuckled…Tamaki would never understand.

"Tamaki…just forget it ok?" He said, taking his hand away from Tamaki's grasp and lying on the bed, sleep taking over his senses.

Tamaki watched him lay down and fought the urge to break down again. One day Kyouya would close his eyes and never wake up again.

Tamaki laid by his side, clutching to the upper part of his pajamas, his head hidden on Kyouya's neck.

"Kyouya…don't leave me…I love you…Mon ami." He whispered at his friend's ear and Kyouya let a tear slip away. He never thought it would hurt this much to leave everyone and everything behind. Kyouya put an arm around Tamaki's waist and held him closer…he would have to go before confessing. Though he never thought about confessing to Tamaki…no, he would take that to the grave.

The door to his room opened, Tamaki and Kyouya's fathers entered along with the rest of the Host Club. They were all a bit shocked to see Tamaki sleeping beside Kyouya, clutching to him, Kyouya holding him. But they all understood how the King and the Shadow must be feeling so they stayed silent.

Kyouya's father sat beside his son's bed and stared at him, Kyouya staring right back. Yoshio patted his son's shoulder and let his hand stay there. The first fatherly gesture he ever had towards his son. Kyouya swallowed hard and held back the tears threatening to fall; he had waited for a moment like this…all of his life.

He turned his head to see Tamaki. He was still asleep, teas shone on the corner of his eyes. Kyouya wiped them off. He got near Tamaki's ear, knowing his friend would not listen – or at least hoping so.

"I love you Tamaki…more than anyone…more than anything." He said and turned back to his father. He had not listened - for the first time his father was worried with him and didn't care about anything at all.

Kyouya closed his eyes…peace. He could finally die in peace; he had his father's love and had confessed his own love. He sighed and closed his eyes. Finally…

Kyouya died on that very day. He never opened his eyes. The doctor said it was normal since they could not predict the amount of time the body would continue to struggle, he said Kyouya had already struggled too much considering the fact that he had probably developed the disease an year ago and under the stressful situations he had gone through they should be happy he lived that long.

Tamaki was put to sleep the moment he found out Kyouya was dead. The doctors injected something to make him sleep for he would not let go of the boy's limp body.

When he woke up he didn't speak, or cry, he jut lay there in the hospital bed, emotionless expression, no movement. It was like he was dead as well.

Because no one knew…no one knew what he heard his friend say…the last thing he said. That was why he had said he would never know friendship or love after Tamaki left…because he loved Tamaki.

If Kyouya had lived…maybe Tamaki would have found out if he loved the boy or not, he would be able to observe his eyes looking for any sign of emotion, he would be able to make Kyouya smile more often and eventually fall in love with that smile. He knew that if Kyouya had lived he would love him completely.

But he died…and Tamaki would always remain in the doubt. And he couldn't leave the doubt because if he truly loved Kyouya…then he would not be able to live with the pain of losing him.

So until they meet again…until Tamaki can absorb the pain, he would not think about his feelings no more. He would not have feelings…for they would bring him back to the one person that was always there for him…that lived to protect him.

He found out about Kyouya's plan…it was all written on his notebook. He didn't marry Haruhi though…he was too broken; Kyouya died and took his heart with him.

He would live for the sake of Kyouya's memory. For everything he had done. And hopefully one day he would meet his friend again.

And finally be able to say…

…I love you too…