Summary: I never could have imagined that I could be with her but here we are in each other's embrace and never to let go of this moment. I love her so much...

Disclaimer: I don't own Tachibana Higuchi's Gakuen Alice/Alice Academy.

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My Love

By MoonNight's Mystic

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Natsume's POV

I never imagined that I would be falling in love. Never.

And I could have never imagined that my best friend would be falling for the same person as me.

I don't know when this happened, she came here seven years back from now. Looking for her best friend Hotaru Imai. Yup. Mikan Sakura is one crazy girl, she never give up, even in the hardest of time. And that smile is always plastered on her face.

Yes, I remember when she had come here, we all were 10 years old...nobody accepted her, she was a 'no star', she got bullied, had a very hard time in this academy but her smile never faltered. That just ticked me off. Why didn't she cried? Why didnt she frown? Why didn't anger consumed her? I just didn't know at that time the answer to 'why'.

One day when we were playing dodgeball, because she challenged me and she lost. Even though she lost she smiled and that was just enough so I asked her...asked her why was she smiling she just lost the game. I was frustrated seeing her smile after losing a game to me.

Then she said, I made her smile. I was taken aback from her answer, I mean she had just lost to me and she was telling me that I made her smile because I enjoyed playing it, that was just confusing. She smiled for me. Seeing her smile I felt something which I didn't like at that moment but you know what, I felt warm. Nobody smiled for me except for Ruka, but her's was different, it made me feel different.

And at that time I knew I had to be more cold around her so she couldn't melt my exterior walls. I didn't want to get attatched to her nor for her to be close to me. But obstinacy is her middle name. No matter how I treated her she would always smile at me and try to break my walls. And no matter how hard I tried to avoid her or push her aside, I found my walls getting weaker and weaker as she usually hang out with me.

I didn't want anybody to hurt her. I didn't want any guy near her but she always used to buzz around that Tsubasa andou, I didn't like it, that guy just ticks me off. But it's alright, I figured their relationship was just a brother-sister relationship, to be honest I believed it when Tsubasa proposed to Misaki sweatdrops (o.o)'

As time passed by I noticed my best friend Ruka getting nervous, having slight tint of blushes on his cheeks and stuttering whenever she was around. I was in real dilema, though he was my best friend I didn't want him to be with her. And to add more frustration in my dilema Mikan was getting along with him pretty quickly, well she's always comfortable around every one.

I had to make my decisions and I did what a best friend should do, I encouraged Ruka to be with her indirectly. It was hard, I had taken too much pain physically and mentally that i was used to all of it but...somethings are just hard to take.

I ignored them most of the time, you can't bear to see your love and your best friend together. I cut most of my classes and whenever Persona came to me with a mission, I used to agree on going at it even if they were deadly just to avoid them. It didn't matter because in anyway I have an alice of fire, I can weild fire which I can use any time but to the cost of my life.

My missions took a lot of energy of mine and I avoided using my fire alice. I wanted to live, I wanted to see her again and I wanted to see her first when returning to the academy. As if luck was on my side and my wishes were coming true, she always used to sit infront my door with her back against the door waiting for me. And when sees me she would get all happy and ponder me with her quesions like... "Oh Natsume are you alright?" or "Are you hurt?" or "Why do you do all this?". How I wished to answer those but she belonged to Ruka so I always shoved her off and closed the door at her face without looking at her.

I just couldn't look at her 'cause if I did I might had not control my feelings and crush her into a deadly hug or pin her to the wall and crush her body to mine to kiss her senseless. I wanted her so much, I wanted her to be mine and nobody else's, I wanted to hold her, kiss her and never let her go but with me she isn't safe, she isn't secure, my life will end soon but the way I was using my power I'll be embracing death slowly. With Ruka she would be much more happy. He can give her security, company and all others things which I cannot. Sometimes I envied him for all this.

Though I treated her as a forgotten person and ignored her, she never left my side. She didn't even go to Ruka and I thought they would be together by then but they weren't. I mentally slapped Ruka but a part...no the whole of me was glad.

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I couldn't help myself so I finally asked Ruka one day...

"Hey, why aren't you and polkadots together?" It was simple and straight-forward. I didn't want to go for the slow talking.

"Huh? What are you talking about?" Urgh! Didn't he hear me... "Why isn't polkadots your girl yet?" I wanted to know desperately...

Ruka was silent for a moment then he spoke "I don't love her.. I mean yeah I liked her before that way but I think it was just infatuation, besides..." He took a break, inhaling some air and continued "...I love another and I'm sure of it" I didn't ask him who that person.

Silence engulfed us for a little more time and out of the blue he said "You should tell her your feelings you know" I didn't say anything so he continued "She's been worried about you ever since you took all those missions. Every single hour we had seen her spacing out or masking a worried expression, going to your favourite spot, the cherry blossom tree in hope of seeing you sitting there and..." I didn't know she was that worrried. Why? I didn't deserve her time. "...she even skipped her classes and wait for you at your door hoping when would you come back. Hotaru was by her side all this time, every night to comfort her."

I covered my eyes with my bangs as he turned towards me. "Why did you take all those missions, Natsume? You ignored her, even me you ignored and everybody was so worried about you. Why?"

"I thought you loved her and you two were toge-" I finaly opened my mouth and he cut me off in the middle of the sentence.

"No! first of all I'm not in love with her and we're not together. Infact, she likes you. Can't you see that? You've been avoiding her 'cause you thought that she and were together. Isn't that the reason?" He more like stated it than asked it.

My mind was still processing what he said when he spoke again and all through this I was silent. "Natsume, stop running away, you don't deserve this. You've suffered a lot, sacrificed your freedom for me and your alice is still hurting you. You just don't deserve this suffering" It was all concern I could hear... "You deserve Mikan and she deserves you."

"Even if I tell her my feelings I can never secure her, and I can never promise her that how long I could be with her" I reasoned, I've never told anyone about my mind-battlings but I needed answers...why can't i be with her? Why can't I have her?

"That's bullshit! You can be with her as long as you want, just stop using your darn alice!" he said sternly and then he left muttering "Just talk to her once about the matter" And I was just left there to see his retreating back and to think.

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Yeah, he was right I never talked to her about this. I've waited for her for seven long years, that's long enough. I can't wait any longer.

So I did what he said and now here I am standing here by our, Mikan's and my favourite spot the cherry blossom tree, waiting...for her to come.

She came and right on time. I mentally chuckled thinking about how she always turn up late to the class but now she've outgrown it. Though I've ignored her some of the time, I had not failed to notice her behaviour and what changes had occurred in her.

She came running, on the path tripping and stumbling. He he, she really is cute. Most guys doesn't find her much attractive and for that I'm grateful 'cause for me she's the most beautiful girl I've ever set my eyes on. And if any guy would lay his eyes on her I'll burn him to ashes, well...Ruka was an exception.

Now here she is, standing infront of me and I'm with my back against the tree, observing her frame. Still the same old Mikan with a more mature face and body, still the same warm smile tugging at her lips.

"Natsume, I got your your note just a moment ago, um...am I late?" I didn't answer her, I just stared at her. She blushed under my lingering gaze, and she's she even more beautiful with blush on. I wanted her in my arms but first I want answers to my questions which only she can answer.

"Hey Polka, why do you stay with me all the time?" Even though she had started wearing those plain panties, I haven't outgrown from calling her polkadots or polka...and how I know it that she doesn't wear them anymore...she still got the habit of stumbling, tripping and you know the drill...I saw her undie. Its not like I want to see it, its all her fault.

"Because I like it, I like spending time with you." She almost in an instance as if she knew somehow that I would be asking her this very question. "And even..." She came closer with a three step distance between us "... though that time would have spend in silence with you, I enjoyed it" She smiled after saying that but tears were forming in her eyes.

"But-" I forgot what I wanted to say after that because she launched her at me and hugged me tightly, my mind wasn't working.

"I knew you were ignoring me but I didn't miss your lingering gaze on me all of those time. I'm not dense anymore." My arms seemed to have their own mind as they wrapped around her waist. I was so engrossed in enjoying her petite body against mine that I couldn't even open my mouth to speak.

She was crying, her shoulders shook and I felt tears sticking to my shirt but I didn't mind, I just tightened my hold on her. She knew all along time and I caused her pain. I want to hit myself so hard right now.

"Why are you holding me now?" It was a dumb question but it just slipped my mind and I just continued to inhale her scent. It was intoxicating, I just want to drown in it.

"I don't want you to leave me again. Don't you know how worried and lonely I was? I used to wait for you, you took days to come back here. When will Natsume come back? or Is Natsume hurt?, Why is it taking him so long?, Why did he go? Why? Why? Why?" She slapped me after saying those words but didn't let go off me. It didn't hurt, her slap I mean but her words just did a great job. I've hurt her so much without even realizing it. I think I'm the dense one here all this time. What bastard I am?

"You know I can't protect you much and I can't even promise how long I'll be able to accompany you in this journey of life" I said looking into her eyes.

"That's just because you are using your alice lavishly. You're selfish you know, you don't want to share your problems with me. I want to erase all of your difficulties,your problens, your pain or atleast you can share it with me." I just felt a lump go down my throat and tears forming in my eyes as she said these between sobs.

"You don't deserve them, Mikan" I reasoned. "Then nor do you!" There was silence but what she said after that made my heart to beat faster.

"I want you, Natsume. I've always wanted you and to be with you. I don't know from when or why or how I started feeling this way about you but..." Her face came closer to mine. "...I love you, Natsume" Tears streamed down her face.

I wasted no time in what I've been meaning to do for years. As soon as those words left her mouth I kissed her hungrily like I've been starving for days and her lips were the only thing I found to tame my hunger. I kissed her fiercely, sliding my tounge into her mouth, assaulting her lips, nibbling, embracing each other tightly. We parted just for air and I told her "I love you so much"

And then I gave her some gentle kisses, fierce kisses, some sloppery ones and some passionate ones. I just can't get enough of her and she didn't mind either. I trailed some sloppery kisses down her jawline, inhaling her scent, gave her love bites, and then kissed her more. I wasn't done yet but she seemed tired so I stopped. I embraced her once more. I shouldn't have thought about future so early. If I knew the satisfaction of having her in my arms and all to myself would be so pleasurable than I expected then I would have never left her side.

I don't know what our future ahead is, I want to enjoy our present to the fullest. I've already wasted seven years and now I'm never gonna let of this girl in my arms ever again.

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A/N: You like it or not? Was the OOCness too much? Well I like Natsume in my way. Was my writng style satisfactory? You want a sequel? If I'll get a good response -ehem- reviews then i'll make one. Flames are not accepted but contructive criticisms might be useful. I know there are many typos and grammatical mistakes so I apologise for it. Ending isn't that much satisfactory but I just couldn't think of some better idea. REVIEW! REVIEW! REVIEW! I WANT REVIEWS!