Prologue - Jaded Sunshine

Every once in a while, the worlds need a hero, and a hero will always rise to the occasion.
But, what happens to those heroes once the worlds are at peace again?
Irreversibly changed, they are cast aside...
Lost and broken, the heroes of old wander the worlds, shadows of their former selves.

-- begin --

Sora was sitting on the dock, looking out over the water that stretched as far as the eyes could see. He was feeling a little restless. It had been six months since he'd returned to the islands. He'd found out that Tidus had never returned to the islands once it had been reformed, and he'd been spending a lot of time recently wondering where he was and what he was up to. Wishing that he was off doing something interesting too.

"What are you thinking about, Sora?" a low voice asked from behind him. Riku sat down next to him, pulling off his shoes and dangling his bare feet into the water.

Sora looked down. He was still too short for his feet to reach the water when he sat on the end of the dock like this, and he suspected that he wouldn't grow much more. He sighed. "I'm thinking about how much it sucks being short," he said flicking a piece of his crazy hair out of his face only to have it fall back and nearly poke him in the eye.

Riku laughed, but it sounded forced. It was a well practiced laugh, to be sure, and if anyone other than Sora had been sitting on the dock, it would have passed unnoticed, but Sora knew his silver haired friend far too well to think that his laughter was sincere. It hadn't been sincere, really, since just about the time they'd come back to the islands.

"You tell me what you're thinking about," Sora commanded, though his tone was casual. There was a long silence. When he didn't get an answer, he glowered at the older male. "I'm not kidding, Riku. Tell me what's wrong."

"It's nothing you can fix," Riku answered finally.

Sora scowled. "You aaaalllllways say that," he scolded. "I'm sure there's something that I can do to help, even if it's just by listening to you vent."

"You already have the weight of the world on your shoulders. I'm not going to unload my own stupid problems on you."

"You're mad about how people are afraid of you," Sora murmured. This was always what Riku was angry about. Always. "They'll come around eventually, I know it." That was always what Sora said to try to make him feel better too. It never worked.

"No, Sora, they won't come around eventually. It's been six months. Even if they were going to start treating me like a person again, I don't know how much more of this I can take in the interim." Suddenly, the anger in Riku's aqua eyes softened. "Can't you see it? They treat you the same way they treat me. Sometimes I think it's worse. At least they don't hide their distain around me. With you, they pretend like they still love you…" His voice trailed off as hurt flashed across Sora's face.

"I don't want to talk about my problems. You're the one who's depressed," Sora said, his voice weak. He didn't like to be reminded that the people he so cared about were only pretending that they cared about him. He knew they feared him as much as they feared Riku, if not more, but he hid that fact way back in the back of his mind and pretended along with the best of them.

Riku smiled sadly. "We're both depressed, Sora. You're just better at hiding it." He offered the brunette a hand up, which Sora took gratefully.

"I figure that if I just keep pretending long enough, that it will become real," the younger whispered. He'd never told anyone that before.

Riku frowned. He felt like his heart was breaking in two. He'd never known just how much pain his little brunette was in. "Sora I…"

Sora interrupted him, a fire fueled by desperation burning brightly in his impossibly blue eyes. "The one thing, the only thing, in this world that I wish for, is for things to go back to the way they were before all the Heartless attack. I wish that things could go back to the way they were supposed to be," he said fiercely, his voice cracking with effort, as if his saying it with enough intensity would make it true.

Riku's words died in his throat. Sora wants his old life back. Pain mixed with resignation settled onto his face. He stared into Sora's eyes as if it would be the last time he would ever see those sky blue orbs, as if he were committing them to perfect memory, glaze of tears and all. Then he did something very strange. He reached out, caught Sora by the shoulders, and placed a single kiss on the sun-kissed skin of the brunette's forehead. "I hope you get what you wish for, Sora. You deserve it." With that, Riku turned around and walked away.

Sora watched his older friend walk down the beach and disappear out of sight. He wanted to call out to him, to tell him to wait, to tell him to come back. His breath caught in his lungs and his throat felt like it was closing, so his call came out as a nearly inaudible wheeze. For some indescribable reason, he was terrified that he was never going to see Riku again.

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x

The next morning, Sora woke up feeling agitated. He decided to walk to Riku's house and apologize for the fight. Something in his mind was telling him that it hadn't really been a fight, but he didn't care. He just needed an excuse to go see Riku. As he rounded to corner onto Riku's street, he nearly walked into Kairi. He was more than relieved to see her; she was the only one, other than Riku, who didn't pretend that she cared about him. It was even better to see that she was alone. She didn't pretend that the cared, but often, when others were around, she pretended like she didn't care, for fear of being outcasted as Sora and Riku were. She looked afraid.

"Have you seen Riku?" she asked quickly.

Sora's heart felt like it had stopped. He sputtered out the words even though his mind was telling him that her question didn't mean it was true. "He…he's gone…" he breathed. His whole body ached. He didn't have anyone left. There was Kairi, but no matter how much she loved him, he knew that she would give that up in an instant for the security that the Islands offered.

Kairi knew what he was thinking. "You have to go…" she whispered.

"There's nothing left for me here." Sora's eyes were blank, like he was in too much pain to be able to express it.

"I know. Promise you'll never forget me."

"I promise." He started walking away, looking mechanical. He was sure that if he allowed himself to feel, he would collapse.

"I still love you…" Kairi whispered, but Sora was long gone.

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x.x

A brunette sat very still on the sandy beach, ignoring the water washing around his shoes and soaking his socks. He was concentrating very hard on not feeling anything. He knew he couldn't handle the pain. His eyes fell on the horizon, and suddenly, darkness began to eat away at the edges of his vision. He wondered vaguely if he was going to pass out. He felt for a split second like he was being ripped in two, and then it passed, as if it had never happened in the first place. Except now there were two heartbeats on that beach.

"What did Riku do to you?" Roxas asked, panting. He was clutching at his chest, as if in physical pain.

Sora looked up at him, sad eyes not really seeing him.

Suddenly, Roxas understood. "He left," he stated, sitting down next to the other half of himself. "I couldn't stand staying joined with you. It hurt too much."

"My broken heart too painful for you to handle?" Sora asked bitterly.

Roxas frowned. Sora was not bitter. He was a lot of things, but bitter wasn't one of them. "I have to get you out of here," he announced. "Staying here to drown in your memories isn't going to help you. We're leaving."

Sora nodded. He would let Roxas lead the way. He didn't care how they left, or where they were going. Only that they were going. He couldn't stand to be on the Islands anymore. Maybe he would come back some day, when it didn't hurt so much. Maybe, while they were gone, they would find Riku… but he couldn't allow himself to hope. If he didn't have wishes and hopes, then no one could dash them.

And thus, Sora of the sky, the eternal sunshine, became jaded.