Standard Disclaimer Applies

WARNING: After 7 years, I have once again re-read my fic and decided to continue. I'm a little rusty in writing stories but I do hope you'll still like this. This time I'm writing this in Kaoru's POV as oro101 suggested years ago.

Chapter 4

I don't know why but I cannot find it in myself to hate him. ENISHI, he could have taken my life and left Kenshin to rot in Rakuninmura but still, I knew there is still hope for him.

Maybe I m being a baka once again as Yahiko seem to always remind me but saving a life is what my father had always taught me. It does not always mean saving it physically but also emotionally. I could not let him be consumed by his memories. I knew what it did to Kenshin and I know it will destroy what little sanity he had.

"He is Insane!" Megumi told me again and again. However, I knew that given a chance of humanity, he may be able to live the life he should have been living if his sister survived. I need to give him the chance of living. Everybody owes him that much.

Kenshin had been silent the whole time. Everybody was against what I intended to do but he kept quiet. It frustrates me again and again how I can't seem to read his mind. I felt so unsure of what he feels. Sometimes, I feel that he cares but there are times that I'm fighting with his memories once again.

After all, who am I to compare with what he had with Tomoe. It's funny really that here I am trying to fix what Tomoe had left. A broken husband and brother. Silly me, insisting on saving both of them.

I proceeded to Rakuninmura to give him the medicines and food that I cooked. As I approached, I looked at him uncertainly then I felt his intake of break and I smiled inwardly. It had always been hard to read Kenshin's mind but with Enishi, it had been so easy.

I knew he longed for a human touch and as much as he insisted that he didn't want me. I knew that as a lie. It was so easy to read his face. Just like before. Even when he captured me and locked me in his island. I knew when he was angry and I knew when he was pretending to be angry.

"He is so unlike Kenshin and yet so similar" I thought silently.

"A, Kenshin" I thought. What am I to do with him? Sometimes I felt suffocated by his politeness. Somehow when he talks to me it always feels like I am stranger trying so hard to be loved by him. It's pathetic really but I have fallen so badly that it hurts. I knew that I am so different with Tomoe but I have been trying so hard to fill his emptiness. So very hard…

I looked at him and chastised him.

Hey, go on, you better eat and drink your medicines. You know I won't leave unless you do." I said reproachfully.

"So, how was it?" I asked excitedly.

"The food was terrible." He replied scathingly

These words, I knew it was true and it somehow brought back the bitterness I felt. Yes I know, I am not like HER.

"I'm sorry" he said.

"No don't be like Kenshin" I thought.

"Stop it, damn it! Don't say you're sorry when it's true. I'm sick and tired of all this. I can't cook, I can't control my temper. I can never replace your sister, right? I'll never be good enough!" I cried brokenly.

"I didn't mean it like that." He said calming me. Somehow, I believed him. Yes, he was so different from him.

"I'm sorry," I said brokenly, trying to control my emotions "I didn't mean to shout at you."

"You are so beautiful." He whispered.

I was shocked at what he said and at the sincerity I saw in his eyes. He looked at me uncertainly and somehow battling with himself, he gathered me in his arms. I smiled with pleasure at his gesture. I let the bitterness flow out of me with his arms steadying me.

"I'm sorry" I said, blushing "I don't know what to say."

"Don't say anything." he said. "It's all right, ok."

From that day forward, I knew that I can save him. Save him from his nightmares and save his humanity. Our friendship grew and everyday I look forward to visiting him.

It has been two weeks already since my first visit. As I prepared his food, I saw Kenshin.

"Kaoru-san, can I go with you?" He said

Surprised, I turned to look at him but his eyes were covered by his hair. Yahiko and Sanosuke had always been violently against this visit but Kenshin kept quiet. He had not agreed nor disagreed with what I was doing.

"Sure" I said uncertainly.

As we walked towards Rakuninmura, I felt his hands reached out and hold mine. Shocked, I glance at him and again I didn't see eyes.

"What does this mean?" I thought.

I smiled as I saw Enishi. He had improved so much.

tbc ^_^ next time it will be Kenshin's POV, what do you guys think? R&R very much appreciated even after all these years. hehe