Lithium, Chapter V

Good Enough

Laughing hysterically, he squeezed the hand belonging to the man next to him. Never before had he thought smiling and laughing could feel so good. It was almost like he'd traveled through time—like he'd left Blue Bay behind.

"That guy looks like an anorexic Choobo," Hunter whispered hoarsely.

Another burst of laughter came from Dustin, the glowing movie lighting up his once depressed brown eyes.

"It's good to hear you laugh again, Dustin."

Hunter's voice was soft and reminiscent—almost tangibly vulnerable.

Dustin's laugh receded but his smile remained as he gazed towards Hunter's glimmering ice-chip eyes.

"Thanks for getting me there…"

A moment of silence consumed them before the movie interrupted them with the screeching of tires.

Their hand-holding resumed in the crowded, dark theater, but neither of them minded.

As credits began to roll, the two young men stood, stretching and talking through strained muscles.

"You hungry yet?" Hunter asked, unsuccessfully stifling a yawn.

Dustin observed Hunter for a few seconds, smiling on the inside at the simple beauty Hunter portrayed.

"Yes," he said with a tone of finality.

Smirking and giving his dark-haired counterpart a confused glance, Hunter walked towards him and the exit.

"Where to?"

"Anywhere."

Undecidedly, they exited the theater, wandering aimlessly toward the main street; neither of them had bothered to drive as ninja streaking made everything much easier.

Hunter's smirk, masked by darkness, was suddenly set ablaze by headlights in their faces.

"Hey you two!" Shane hollered through the open side window.

Dustin and Hunter fought back smiles.

"Do we know you?" Hunter questioned sincerely.

Tori mocked a smile, "Real funny."

"Get in; we're going to meet Blake for dinner!" Cam shouted happily, acting uncharacteristically boisterous.

"Blake's in town? Since when?" Hunter demanded, jumping into Tori's huge van with Dustin following.

"His factory tour's coming to a close in Baja, so he figured he'd stop by beforehand," Shane explained. "Maybe we can go see his final race?"

Dustin and Hunter exchanged looks, and then expressed their responses affirmatively.

"Sweet; I'm sure Blake'll be stoked," Shane said as the radio took over the van.

Ten minutes later and the only words exchanged were silent, event-filled whispers between Hunter and Dustin in the back, leaving the rest of the van baffled as to what was being said.

"Here we are," Tori announced, breaking the awkward silence that had settled among the teammates.

With smiles plastered to their radiant faces, Hunter and Dustin boyishly jumped from the van, whooping and bouncing.

Tori glanced at Cam, "Any idea what's with those two?"

Cam bit his tongue. He had an idea. He had several, to be honest; the hardest part about having the ideas was accepting them…

"You guys came!"

Hunter looked up to see his shaggy-haired brother coming out of the upscale restaurant. He was dressed down in a casual, midnight blue long-sleeved polo and a pair of khaki slacks. Compared to Hunter and Dustin's non-formal wear, he looked rather…business-like. Tori, Cam, and Shane had all prepared for the event ahead of time. Shimmering in an aqua marine summer dress with her wavy, glossy hair, Tori hugged her ex-boyfriend with familiarity and good humor.

Shane shook hands with Blake, exchanging a side-hug and careful not to wrinkle his freshly ironed red dress shirt. His black, crease-free jeans hung loosely around his feet as he was careful to avoid the puddle waiting to sabotage him.

Next up, Cam greeted Blake warmly with a head nod and hand shake. His stature was a bit off-handed, his white-and-green striped polo contrasted against Blake's navy in an almost violent manner—however their khaki's, identical as they were—seemed to get along quite nicely.

"Sorry we forgot to dress up, bro," Hunter said, squeezing the air from his little thunder brother.

"Not really a problem," Blake replied, looking Hunter up and down.

He wasn't necessarily dressed down, although he and Dustin were the only ones wearing blue jeans. In fact, he and Dustin were almost identical if it hadn't been for the colors. They both wore thick striped polo shirts with their respective colors—crimson and yellow—and slightly torn, faded blue jeans.

"Blaaaaaaake," Dustin greeted, dragging out the male's name, "Good to see you dude."

"Likewise, man," Blake agreed, side-hugging his moto-friend somewhat awkwardly.

"So, who's hungry?" Hunter asked quickly.

For the first time in a while, all six answered in unison.

Entering the restaurant as quietly as six, young, estranged teammates could, they took their reserved seats and immediately began reviewing the menus, talking casually as they did so.

"And what've you been up to that kept you from keeping in touch?" Blake finally inquired his older brother.

Hunter exchanged looks with his boyfriend before swallowing a sip of water.

"Well," he began, "Sensei Amino wanted me to learn this new technique; so, he got a fill-in for me and sent me off to train in the mountains. It's an extremely difficult technique, but it's probably the most useful I've ever learned. The only downside is that it takes months to master," He spared Dustin a look, then corrected himself, "At least for me it did."

The table was quiet.

"So…what was the technique?" Blake asked as if his question was obvious.

Another sip of water as the flickering candle placed shadows across his face, Hunter composed himself.

"It…allows me to talk to dead ninjas," he spoke softly.

Again, silence. Dustin fidgeted a bit, and then looked at the expression on each person's face. Tori was focused on Blake, who looked like he'd been punched in the stomach. Shane's eyes were glued to Hunter, a look of complete and total shock stamped on his face. Cam nodded to himself as if he'd always known, and Hunter looked expectant.

"You…you talked to mom and dad?" Blake choked out.

He nodded.

"And?"

"They're good."

Blake sat back, folding his arms in deep thought.

"You never told anyone?"

"Not until recently."

"What do you mean recently?"

"He…he told me," Dustin chimed in.

The table turned their eyes Dustin, a look of curiosity shining through their eyes.

"I guess I have some explaining to do," Dustin sighed.

Hunter, who was at his side, gripped his hand supportively. He knew what Dustin was about to reveal and however that night turned out they were going to walk out together—with or without their friends.

"After my mom died last year, my dad and I were completely shot down. Neither of us knew up from down. So, we started seeing separate psychiatrists—I never wanted to, but he thought it'd be good for me. He put me on Lithium. And…I've never told anyone—I've always kinda been ashamed, ya know? Anyway…I, it was hard for me to cope. And then I started taking them and they helped at first—I didn't feel the pain, the grief, I didn't have the nightmares—it was almost like I was numb to reality."

"So what's the problem with that?" Shane interrupted.

"Well, when you're numb, you can't feel pain, but you can't feel pleasure either, Shane."

The red ranger quieted.

"So, up until recently, I've been taking 900 milligrams every day to help me get through it, although I've never really let go…let her go," another pause, "But earlier today, in the academy fields, I talked to her. It was so weird. It was like I felt the divine wraths of heaven all at once, then they all went away and she was there."

"What'd she say?" Tori eagerly grilled him.

"That I need to let go, and just live…" he sighed, "And that I shouldn't be worried about life and that I should enjoy it."

The table paused with him.

"Sounds like a good idea to me," Blake said happily, "That's why we're all here; to enjoy life—in all its little quirks and all its big schemes."

"We should all be a little more open with each other and just not be afraid of what might happen," Tori chimed in.

Cam and Shane nodded.

"You're right, Tor," Dustin commented, gripping Hunter's hand even tighter, "And that's why Hunter and I have something we need to say."

Confusion crossed Blake and Shane's faces, but Tori and Cam looked anxious, almost as if they'd been waiting on edge for verification.

"What's up guys?"

Hunter looked at Shane, analyzing his question; his attitude seemed to be carefree and casual…which worried him.

"We, ah…we're…sort've…together," Hunter said quietly.

Blake blinked as eternal silence blanketed the table. No gasp, no widened eyes, not whispering—nothing. Creeping into his mind, all sorts of horrible scenarios played throughout Hunter's crammed mind. Finally, the silence was broken as Shane asked, dumfounded:

"What do you mean?"

Dustin sucked in a breath, and then pulled his hand, along with his own, to the top of the table. There, like some sort of exposed, dissected creature, their entwined fingers lay open—exposed—to the outside world, ready for criticism.

"Oh," Shane said shortly.

Cam removed his glasses, shining them quietly.

"Well, I can't say it wasn't expected," he said pointedly.

Dustin cocked an eyebrow.

"Well, with the way you two were going on, it'd have been hard not to find out."

Hunter chuckled slightly at Cam's remark.

"Yeah…I mean…I guess this explains a lot," Tori added.

Hunter looked at her and instantly he could see the pain in her eyes—her expression held so much emotion and hurt, like she'd been betrayed and stabbed through her heart.

"I…I'm sorry we didn't say anything before."

"How long has this been going on?" Shane asked, interested as he sipped his water.

"Um…well I've been away, but I guess we just…I dunno, started? Around the time I left for the Thunder Academy."

Tori bit her tongue, begging the tears not to fall. She'd trusted him with everything, with herself and somehow, some evil way, it wasn't good enough. She wasn't good enough. Hesitantly, she smiled at Dustin.

"You never told me?" Blake asked in an incredulous voice.

Hunter tried to read the tone, but he couldn't place anger or disgust anywhere in it—nor could he place acceptance and love.

"N-no…I didn't. I'd never really been sure of anything. Those six months let me reflect on a lot more than just my training."

"But I'm your brother, Hunter."

"I know…and I'm sorry."

"We both are," Dustin inserted quickly.

"Well why are we all so bummed out? I mean, what's so bad about this?" Shane asked, patting the two nearest people—Cam and Blake—on the shoulders.

"Shane's right," Cam said, "We should be happy for them."

Dustin and Hunter smiled greatly at the kindness of their friends. Somehow, in all the doubt that had shrouded both of their minds, hope began to burn through—at first lightly, then gracefully and blindingly.

"You're right," Blake said, shaking his head, "Whoever you're with is cool with me, as long as you're happy."

Hunter couldn't really believe his ears. Such good things didn't just come without a price. Then he remembered Tori. As if expecting his look, Tori piped up.

"Yeah, definitely, I'm happy for…the both of you."

Finally, happiness had settled in and no matter what anyone else said—no matter what anyone else did—they were happy. It may not have been an eternal happiness, but at that time, happy was good enough. It was good enough to be with friends, it was good enough to love, and it was definitely good enough live—without the help of any numbing pills, because in the end, the best form of medication—is love.