Addicted

Slightly423psychotic

I own nothing but guitar picks and my baby guitar. Oh and the shiny penny sitting next to me. I do not own Gilmore Girls, nor am I affiliated with them at all.

T – PG13

WARNING: MAJOR REFERENCES TO DRUGS AND SEXUAL CONTENT.

Thank you to Kiki for betaing this for me! You're wonderful.

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I've never been to one of these before. That's why I'm here now. The thought of it makes my stomach churn and all I can think about are the butterflies that are trying to rip my stomach open and what I'm going to have to say once I'm inside the room. It's not that I'm trying to delay the fact that in just a few minutes I'll have to spill everything, it's just that the door is locked. There are a few other people around me. Most older than me, but I see one girl who looks to be about me age. I figure this won't be last time I'm here, so I better find someone to talk to so it's easier to get through these.

She's dressed casually, and her jeans have a rip in the right knee. I can tell they're like that from wear and tear, and weren't bought like that. She has a bulky sweatshirt on, and her hair is in a messy bun on the back of her head. I notice her nails are painted black.

"Hi, I'm Rory." I extend my hand to her. She either ignores me or doesn't hear me. So I try again, "I'm Rory, what's your name?" Again nothing. I sigh and bit my lip. I'm about to walk away when she lifts her head and purses her lips.

"You've never been here before." She states. Was it that obvious? I look down at my not ripped jeans and hoodie. I don't look that much different, do I?

"Excuse me?" I mentally slap myself. 'Excuse me?' What kind of question is that?

"It's like a rule of thumb. You'll figure it out." She doesn't supply me with anything else. I hesitate.

"I'm sorry, what will I figure out?" She shakes her head.

"It's like a thing. You don't know me, I don't know you. Get it?"

"Not exactly." The girl sighed. A wisp of blonde hair falls from behind her ear and she quickly tucks it back. I can tell she's getting somewhat frustrated. "Look, I know I'm new, but I also know that this won't be my only time here. I'm just…looking for someone who I can recognize and be familiar with."

Her eyes widen. "Oh, I don't go that way. I'm straight. Sorry." She turns away from me. I realize what she's talking about.

"I didn't mean it like that. I just meant that it would make these less painful if I at least recognized someone." I shrugged helplessly. The girl nods in understanding. She still hasn't told me her name.

"You get used to it." A pause. I see her looking me over. "I'm Sara." I smile slightly and nod. Her mouth opens to indicate she was going to say something when we're interrupted. A woman in her early 40s approaches the group. I notice that more people have shown up. She smiles at us as a whole and unlocks the door, allowing us all to enter.

The room smells funny. I can't place the smell, but it reminds me of a mix of sweat and pizza. It makes me want to throw up. Everyone takes a seat in a chair. The chairs are surprisingly comfortable. I don't sit next to Sara, but instead see her sitting across from me. The woman starts.

"Welcome back everyone. I suspect you've all had challenging weeks?" There's a murmur of agreement. "As some of you may have noticed, we have a new face. To start out, will someone go first and demonstrate what we do?" A few hands slowly go up. She calls on a young woman. She has a black eye.

"My name is Fee, and I'm 23. I've been addicted to heroin for 2 years, 3 months, and a few days. I've been addicted to black tar cocaine for 1 year and 6 months. And lastly, I've begun smoking cigarettes again in my attempts to stop my addictions. So far, nothing. This weekend, I didn't have enough money for my heroin, so after handing me the vile, my dealer punched me here," She touches her eye, " and here." She points to her stomach.

"Thank you Fee. Someone else?" A young boy goes.

"My name is Ricket, and I'm 14. I'm a crack cocaine baby. It's been 3 months and 22 days since my last time. This weekend, my mom was put back into a treatment center." I bit my lip. It's not even his fault. I look up and I see the leader of the group looking at me. I nod in understanding.

"Hi. Umm, my name is Rory and I'm 18. I umm, I'm an alcoholic. I've been one for 3 years, and a few months. I was suspended from school until I enrolled in some kind of treatment. I'm hoping this works, and if it doesn't…then I have to be placed in a 24-hour treatment center with no family visits. It's been three hours since my last drink." I finish and no one looks sympathetic or surprised. To tell the truth, I'm not really surprised with any of the stories either. They're all in a similar position as me. Sara goes next.

"My name is Sara and I'm 19. My brother—"

"Where is your brother, Sara?" The woman interrupts gently.

"I'm not sure. He promised he'd come today. Anyway, my twin brother and I have been doing 'shrooms and methyl amphetamines since we were 13. I won't speak for my brother anymore. I've also been sexually assaulted." My stomach spins. "This weekend, I had the abortion after much debate. My br—" She was cut off when the door opened. A young male came in. I noticed he looked a lot like Sara.

"Hi, I'm sorry." He sits down in the last empty chair.

"It's alright. Your sister was just finishing." He nods and looks around the room, his eyes settling on me. I cower under his gaze and listen to Sara finish.

"My brother was with me when I had it done." She bites her lip as a tear falls. "It hurt. Really bad, but I couldn't have it. I wouldn't be able to find the father or live with myself if I kept it." I watch as she struggles. "It's been 1 month since I snorted meth and one week since I did 'shrooms." The woman nods.

The rest of the 2-hour meeting goes by quickly. After leaving, I felt relieved. Somehow, it gave me hope. From listening to people's stories, and things they've tried and if it worked…it helped. Helped me. As I was about to leave the building someone grabs my arm. I turn around. It's Sara.

"Look, I'm sorry about before. I didn't mean to be a bitch." I shrug it off.

"It's okay. You had a bad weekend." She scoffs.

"Yea." She looks at her watch and then turns her gaze to her brother who stops next to her. I realize he didn't talk today.

"I don't think we've met. I'm Tristan." I nod and shake his extended hand. "So what's your deal?" I must've given him a confused look since he rephrased. "Why are you here?"

"Oh, I'm an alcoholic." I pause. "And I'm physically abused."

"Cool. Meth and LSD are my poison. But hey, we all have our own thing, right?"

I nod. "Yea, I guess."

"Hey, Sara and I usually get ice cream after this. It usually helps us keep clean for a few hours. Wanna join us?" I shrug. I have nowhere to go. I can't go to school, so I agree.

"Yea, sure." We walk. Although we're usually under the influence of something, we know better than to use cars, at least in our sober states. We're all clean at the minute since we'll get kicked out of the program if we show up inebriated in any way. As we're walking to the ice cream place, I try and keep my thoughts from drifting to the unfinished bottle of Vodka under my bed. I can almost taste it, and my mind reels as I suddenly feel a deep need for something other than ice cream. As I almost fall, Tristan stabilizes me by holding my arms. Sara stops and waits. She's not fazed at all.

"Are you okay?" I look into his blue eyes swirling with concern. I nodded and swallow. I grimace at my sore and dry throat.

My voice cracks. "I just went through withdrawal." They both nod in understanding. I forget that they both separately have experienced more than me with drugs and relapse and urges.

"It's okay. Come on, we're almost there." Sara says sympathetically. After a few more minutes and Tristan making sure I'm upright and stable, we finally get to the parlor. As we enter, I silently wonder if there's a vodka or tequila flavor. My hopes are squashed when I see that they only have 10 flavors. None of which have anything to do with alcohol. I sigh. It's going to be a long day.

AN: I'm back. Hi. I know this chapter was somewhat short and probably confusing, but as the chapters progress it will probably become easier to understand. And yes, Rory is VERY AU. I hope you guys like it, and updates may not be often. Just depends on my course load. Thanks! Emilie