Alright, another quick post. Don't expect this once a day thing often though, hahaha. I just really flew through this one.
Kay, so the first bit of dialogue is supposed to be disjointed. Don't worry about it, it's fine. I think.
Um, lots of emo-ness in this chapter, but I think that Gaara was due for some anyways. Made up for it a bit in the end.
Hope you enjoy it!!! XD
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Disclaimer: I own nothing.
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Chapter Twelve: Love Stories and Perfect Endings.
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"This movie is so stupid."
"What? What's wrong with Mamma Mia? Come on Gaara, you know that you're a dancing queen at heart."
"Oh, you're fucking hilarious, Hyuga."
"I know, it's one of my many great qualities. But what's wrong with this movie?"
"It's like every inane romantic comedy. Stuff does not happen this way."
"What way is that? You fall in love with someone and get married?"
"No, and they didn't get married anyways. It's the mom and Pierce Brosnan."
"Yeah, he comes back and they get together again."
"Twenty-one years later."
"And that's stupid?"
"Yeah, it's stupid."
--
"Now, what do we have here?"
The two boys locked in a lovers embrace froze, lips and hips still attached. Eyes wide open, they stared at each other without moving, Gaara very willing to jump up and leave, Neji too scared to move.
The Hyuga had not been able to place the voice, being slightly distracted by a shirtless red head underneath him. He doubted that it was his Uncle as there would have been much more shouting and broken items flying had it been. But still, the slim possibility that it was in fact Hiashi kept him looking into Gaara's eyes, praying he was hearing voices in his head, rather then facing the very unwelcome intruder.
Neji could see the fear in Gaara's eyes as well, though he was too far caught up in his own thoughts to try and decipher what was going on in the red head's mind. Slowly, he managed to at least separate their lips so they could both pant out some air, although suffocating might be better then the potential alternative.
"You know, I should have known that you were gay, Hyuga. But Gaara, well that is a surprise, dude."
Neji almost fainted in relief, his head sagging to the side of the bed next to Gaara's. He breathed out breath after heavy breath of air, relieved to finally place the voice as fucking Naruto showing up from the bathroom. His whole body melted in Gaara's, as if exhausted from the intense moment of extreme tension. The red head under him, however, stayed as stiff as he was when he first heard the voice.
"Hyuga, get up." Neji heard the panicked whisper in his ear.
Neji rose to his elbows to look at Gaara, who still seemed to be contemplating fight or flight. "Gaara, no it's just Naruto. We're good, he just had really bad timing."
"Hyuga, get off of me." The command was stronger this time, though still a little panicky.
Neji gave Gaara a confused look. Why was the red head acting like this? What was his problem all of a sudden? "Gaara, what-"
"Neji! Get the fuck off me!"
Too startled to reply, Neji rolled off of Gaara and to the side of the bed. Bemusedly, he watched as Gaara scrambled off of the bed, frantically fixing the shirt that Neji had pinned him with. "Gaara?"
Gaara finished buttoning the shirt, several out of place, and stood there, looking from side to side, running his hand through his hair, and avoiding seeing even a glimpse of Neji or Naruto. Neji stood up slowly and walked around the end of the bed, approaching Gaara slowly. He had no idea what was going through the red head's mind right now. What he did know was that this was not a normal reaction, Gaara looked to be about to have a panic attack, and the Hyuga had no idea what to do with that.
He reached out to Gaara who was still looking at anything but him. "Gaara, are you okay? It's fine you don't have to-"
"No! I have to, I have to um," Gaara looked up to Neji at that point and all Neji saw was a panicked, terrified version of his usually so collected boyfriend. "I, I have to go."
And he left.
Neji collapsed on the end of the bed, head in his hands. He barely registered Naruto asking if he was okay, then saying that he was going to go after Gaara. The Hyuga just sat there, trying desperately to figure out what the hell happened.
Fight or flight? Flight, apparently.
--
Gaara had gotten into his house, run to his room, slammed the door, dove into the sheets, and not moved a muscle since.
It was morning now and he was supposed to be at school.
Well, he had moved slightly. The bed was still there, and the blankets and pillows, just now he was sitting on them, not lying under them. There was less…association with unpleasant events with the sitting.
It was not even that the events had been unpleasant, just the way that they had ended. The abrupt and quite frankly mortifying way that they had ended.
Gaara had zero clues as to why he left the way he did, why he snubbed Neji who tried to reach out to him, or Naruto who had followed him almost the whole way to his house. He had no idea why he continued to ignore them today, the cell phone lying on the pillow next to him ringing seemingly every five minutes, the Hyuga's name dashed across the call display. There was no obvious reason why he had not gone to the door when the bell had been rung dozens of times. There was no excuse for leaving who he just knew to be Neji standing at his front door so early in the morning.
And yet, they had seemed like the only thing to do.
Once more, Gaara went over the events in his head, playing out like a movie. Neji and him on the bed, him on the Hyuga's lap, the long haired boy on him, Naruto walks in, panic sets, Gaara freaks, leaves. After that it was just a wave of emotion and confusion that he had no idea what to do with, things that he had never felt before.
He closed his eyes, trying and failing to decipher what had gone on in his mind, what was still going on at this point.
He could feel the vibrations from his phone through the mattress. The hard sound of a Gazette song playing through the air. Gaara did not have to look to know that it would be Neji once more trying to get a hold of him. He was one of the only people with the cell number, and the others who ha it would not call him anyways.
He briefly toyed with the idea of answering it, but answering the phone meant answering Neji's questions, and Gaara knew that he was just not ready to do that yet. He let the song play out, the notes of Filth in the Beauty lingering in his mind.
--
"Hyuga! You know the school rules! Go put that phone in your locker!"
Neji nodded to the teacher and left the class silently. He had been trying to get a hold of Gaara all day, calling between classes, his free period, when he thought that the teachers couldn't see him behind his books. He supposed that it was only a matter of time before someone noticed.
He wandered through the hallways for an appropriate amount of time, dialling again and again before making his way back to class. When he got to the door he forlornly put the phone away, his only loose connection to Gaara now cut. He went back to his seat and mechanically began doing his work once more, the harsh eye of the teacher close on him.
Neji had an idea why Gaara had freaked out and left. He knew that it had something to do with Naruto showing up and interrupting them fooling around. What he didn't know was why Gaara lost it like that. He had reason to be embarrassed, that was understandable, Neji himself was. But you would have thought that Gaara's father himself had walked in on them. So not knowing what was really the problem he had no idea how to solve it. Part of him said that he should leave the red head alone and let him sort things out for himself. But a larger part was too worried about his boyfriend to just keep right out of it.
Neji knew that something had happened to Gaara when he was little that left him more then a little bit emotionally unstable, he had seen bits of Gaara's "bad moods" here and there, and they had scared him a bit. Mostly because he had no idea the drive behind them. He didn't know how to help, and that made him feel useless, something Neji had felt rarely in his life, if ever before.
A bit of digging around had gotten him the address of Gaara's house, and he had been there this morning. But the red head either wasn't there or he was just completely ignoring him. Neji was reluctant to admit, but the latter was more likely.
Forcing himself to go back to his work, Neji sighed, knowing that he would be back at the same, perpetually closed door after school.
--
Lunch found Neji sitting at Hinata's usual table instead of out with Gaara where he should be.
"Hey! Neji!" An all too familiar voice called to him over the noise of the caf. He turned to see an energetic blond running towards him, and his glare deepened, mood sinking quickly. The blonde reached their table and sat across from Neji. Apparently he sat there with Hinata's group every day and Neji had just failed to notice him (although blatantly blocked out of his mind was more likely). "Hey, Gaara wasn't in class today, have you talked to him? He was totally freaked out last night. Maybe he stayed home today?" Naruto scanned the caf. "What do you think?"
"I think," Neji said, leaning closer and growing more and more furious and irritated with the blonde boy by the second, "that you should get the fuck away from me and keep your nose out of other people's god damn business. That's what I think."
Naruto looked at Neji for a moment, shock evident on his face, before he wisely took the Hyuga's advice and moved further down the table.
Neji knew that it wasn't Naruto's fault. If anything, he believed it to be his, letting himself and Gaara go one so long knowing that Naruto would be back in no time. Neji just needed someone to vent on, though that little outburst had not seemed to quell the anger he felt for very long.
He flipped out his phone and dialled the number long since memorized, praying that this time he would get a response. Predictably he didn't, and his mood fell once more. The Hyuga would leave a message, but Gaara didn't have his fucking voicemail activated. So instead he snapped the phone shut, angrily stuffing it into his pocket.
"N-Neji?"
Surprised by the timid voice coming from the person next to him, Neji looked over to see Hinata watching him with worried eyes. He cleared his throat, trying to keep his voice level and not start shouting, "yes, Miss Hinata?"
"It's G-Gaara, isn't it? W-what you're … so mad about?"
Neji just nodded, not in the situation to elaborate much further.
"Don't b-be worried, cousin." Hinata said, smiling at him softly but with traces of worry still evident in her gaze. "H-he," she blushed slightly, "he really c-cares deeply for you, I-I can tell. So, don't be worried, um, okay?"
Neji could only stare at his shockingly perceptive cousin. Strangely, he felt a little bit lighter.
--
Gaara had to leave his room eventually. It was inevitable that he would have to pee at some point. What was more unfortunate was that his hunger eventually drew him downstairs. Even more unfortunate was the fact that this was after his father had already come home from work. Worse still was it was a Tuesday so Temari would be home, meaning that there would not be even the slightest buffer should his dad notice him.
Hunger eventually outweighed fear, and after Gaara was successful in getting to the bathroom without being seen, he felt daring enough to try to reach the kitchen unnoticed.
Alas, fate is cruel and just as he was turning the corner to the salvation of an empty food room, he heard a voice beckoning him from down the hall.
With really no other choices, Gaara walked slowly towards the TV room, the sound of a taped football game from the night before blaring. His father sat on the couch, beer in hand, eyes focused on the pictures of the teams moving.
"Kankuro said that you didn't go to school today."
Gaara stayed silent, knowing that even if he tried to make up a lie it would not be believed, just dismissed. So he just stood at the doorway to the room, waiting for his father to begin a threat of some sort.
"Listen to me, I do not send you to school just so you can blow it off, you hear me? You'd better go tomorrow or there will be hell to pay. Got that?"
Gaara didn't even bother to answer or argue. His father's threats were as empty as always. He would never actually do anything but yell at his son, as everything else was just too intimate for him. His appetite suddenly gone, Gaara bypassed the kitchen, making his way to the stairs. He paused at the sound of the doorbell. The sound reverberated through his skull. Gaara turned to see his father walking to the door, opening it, desperately hoping the person he knew would be there was not.
--
Neji grumbled to himself as he drove to Gaara's house. He had meant to be there so much earlier, but his Uncle had decided it was a good day for Neji to give Hinata a complete course tutorial in Introductory Calculus. It made it worse that the girl felt so bad, knowing where Neji truly wanted to be. The notion that she knew about himself and Gaara had not even been processed properly at this point, he was so focused on talking to his red head. He was sure that later there would be many questions, but now he had more important things to do.
Pulling into Gaara's street, Neji squinted to remember which house it was… there! He parked across the street, the driveway blocked already by two cars. Turning off the ignition, Neji laid his head briefly against the steering wheel and breathed deeply, trying to prepare himself for this. He had no idea what he was going to say, he just wanted to know what was going on. That was if Gaara would even talk to him, of course…
Before he knew it, Neji was across the street and ringing the doorbell. He nervously tucked his hair behind his ears and then brought it back to frame his face while he waited, shifting from foot to foot.
After what seemed like hours, the door swung open to find a man, who he assumed was Gaara's father, standing there in a full suit, looking very irritated. The man (father?) stared at him for a moment before Neji saw recognition light in his eyes and he plastered a smile on his face.
"Hyuga Neji." He said. "Well, what an honour it is to have you at my house. Come in, what can I do for you?"
"Thank you," Neji said, trailing off.
"Oh, excuse my rudeness. I am Subaku Hideo. We met once, I believe at a dinner party of your father's, but I expect that you get introduced to so many men and women at those things that you would not remember me."
"Yes, I am sorry, but the event has slipped my mind, I am afraid."
"Quite alright, I assure you. Now what did you say that I could do for you?"
"I am actually here to talk to you son, Gaara."
Neji could see the smile falter ever so slightly before it was plastered back into place. "Gaara you say? O-of course, I will go and get him for you. Do make yourself comfortable."
Neji watched the retreating back of the man until he disappeared around a corner of the hall. He took off his shoes and looked around, advancing into the house. It was very nice, wood floor, spacious, impeccably clean, and well coloured. Neji went into the front sitting room, taking a place on one of the seemingly brand new couches.
In this room there were photos placed throughout. Inspecting the ones close and then moving to look at the ones along the walls, he noticed an abundance of family photos. All of which Gaara had been placed in the back or had just not appeared in. Naturally, Neji found this quite odd and filed it away in the back of his mind to ask Gaara later. He sat back down on the couch as he heard footsteps coming down the hall.
--
"Ah, here he is, Neji," Hideo said, producing his son like a gift to the Hyuga. A gift that he had to force to come. "I will leave you two alone," he said, sending a warning glance Gaara's way. The red head just ignored him, staring blankly at the Hyuga. Apparently, when a Hyuga showed up at your house you just did not dismiss what they had to say, regardless how much you wanted to send them away. Gaara glared at the glass doors that closed with a soft click and offered zero privacy.
"Hey," Gaara heard Neji call out to him from the couch. He turned and saw the Hyuga just sitting there, apprehension clear on his face.
"You found me," Gaara said in a resigned voice, flopping down on the couch next to the Hyuga.
"Well, you weren't hard to find. Getting to talk to you, well, that was another matter. Luckily your dad loves to kiss Hyuga ass."
"Yeah, well, at least one of us does," Gaara said, closing his eyes and letting his head fall back on the couch.
"Oh, I see how it is, you jerk," Neji said playfully. Gaara felt him give him a small shove in the shoulder. "And you left me all alone today. I had nothing to do in math but work. It was depressing."
"The sympathy is flowing," the red head said, sarcasm laden in his voice.
"Hn, thanks," Neji said dryly. "Well you left me to deal with Hinata's friends at lunch Apparently Naruto sits with them every day, eh?"
At the sound of a certain blonde's name Gaara stiffened involuntarily. Apparently there were still some issues to deal with in that department.
It did not go unnoticed by Neji. "So, do you want to talk about what happened last night, or no?" He asked the other boy softly.
Gaara just sat their silently for a few moments more before jumping out of the couch. "I can't sit in here anymore," he said. "I hate this room. Let's go upstairs."
The red head waited impatiently for Neji to get off the couch and led the way down the hall, up the stairs, down another hall, and to Gaara's room, thankfully without any interruptions.
Gaara sat on the bed while he watched Neji look around his room. He realized that it would be the first time that Neji had even been in his house, let alone his room. The Hyuga took a moment to absorb the sheer amount of books that littered every available space, and then the video games that took up the rest. Gaara knew that littered in there would be more then a few of Neji's own games, but the Hyuga had most likely not even noticed they were gone, forget recognizing them by name.
Curiosity eventually satisfied, the ridiculously long haired boy sat down next to Gaara, shuffling over so that their shoulders were touching.
"So," Neji said, breaking the silence that had infolded them. "Um, about last night…"
He left the sentence hanging and Gaara knew that in some way he was giving him an out. The red head could just shut him out, claim that he didn't want to talk about (which he certainly did not) and just never mention it again. But he knew that this was not a viable option. Grateful as he was for the opportunity, he did not want to leave Neji in the dark about it. Most likely he had scared the shit out of the Hyuga by the way he had acted, if the amount of phone calls was any indication. Gaara sighed.
"Yeah, so, um, I might have over reacted…"
"Maybe just a tad," Neji said, laughing lightly. Gaara sent him a glare. "Sorry."
"Okay, so, here's the thing." Gaara looked out the window to his right, ignoring the Hyuga for now. "I'm, um, I'm okay with this," he gestured between himself and Neji, still not looking at the other boy. "But, ah, not so much with other people. You know?"
Gaara snuck a peek at the other boy, and it was clear from his expression that he did not know where Gaara was going with his thought process. Christ, he is thick sometimes. Do I have to spell it out for him?
"Right," he said, eyes going back to the window. 'So, we're cool and everything. But other people knowing about us, I guess, is a bit of an issue…and I just don't like to be in that situation where, you know…I have to be like that in front of someone else, cause that's just a little too…open for me?"
Gaara could practically feel the other boy's eyes glaring into the back of his head. The red head knew that he was not the most coherent person when it came to expressing himself, but he hoped that Neji would get the gist from the little he had told him.
Truth be told, there was so much more to it then Gaara had said, but he did not feel comfortable revealing that to the Hyuga yet. He had decided that he would leave it a phobia of public displays of affection, a much simpler explanation. And yet, even explaining that left Gaara floundering. All he wanted he Hyuga to know was that physical affection between them was fine (amazing) but other people need not witness that.
Now if he could only open his mouth and say that…
--
Neji could only stare at his cute, socially retarded little red headed boyfriend.
A small smile formed on his face as he realized what was really going on here. His little love bunny was afraid of PDA.
The Hyuga had to keep himself from laughing with relief, as cruel as it was. He had been thinking the whole day that there was something much, much more serious then this at play. Neji was sure that there was something that lay further beneath the surface, something that Gaara was not telling him or even hinting towards, but for now, he could deal with this problem.
"It's okay Gaara," he said softly, making sure that he did not make the boy feel stupid. "You know, a lot of people do not like to display their affection in public."
The red head finally turned to look at him. "Seriously?"
"Yeah, seriously," Neji said. "I mean, most people are fine with holding hands or kissing in public, but some people just don't like to do that. I know someone who won't even hug her boyfriend if they're in a crowded place."
Gaara stared into space. He looked to be trying to make sense of what Neji had just said. The Hyuga could only marvel at the complete innocence of the boy before him. He truly had no idea what had been going on. His social knowledge was slim to none, Neji knew. He wondered what it was that made Gaara end up this way. The Hyuga had inkling that it had something to do with his father, but he knew that it was more then that. How could someone grow to this age and not know about things like PDA?
His thoughts were broken up by Gaara speaking one more. "So, if I said that I didn't want to…"
"Gaara," Neji said, putting his arm around the other boy's shoulders and hugging him even closer, "you do not have to do anything you don't want to. If you don't want to kiss me in front of people, you don't have to, okay? I'm not going to force you into anything."
"Right, okay." Gaara said quietly, and Neji could see the smallest hint of a blush donning the red head's cheeks. This was obviously an embarrassing line of conversation for the other boy. Glad that they had gotten the problem resolved, Neji decided to change the topic of conversation.
"So, I see why you need to work so much. You have more freaking books then most libraries."
'Hey, don't make fun of me just 'cause you never read, Hyuga. I'm beginning to wonder if you even can."
'Of course, I read movie covers, don't I?"
"Thus the reason that you are a monosyllabic ape."
"You know, we can't all be midgets like you."
"Fuck you, Hyuga. Six inches. Six, that's all you've got on me. I'm up at least thirty IQ points. Even you should be able to tell who wins that."
"Silly Gaara, I wasn't talking about our height."
--
The next day found Gaara in math class. Unfortunately he seemed to overcome his little emotional break down and now had no plausible reason to skip out. Though really, he doubted that a truly plausible reason was never needed.
Amazingly enough, the class was almost full even this early. Usually everyone would just pile in last minute and race for their seats. He liked it that way. It left Gaara alone longer, and on good days, he got to see someone completely face plant tripping over a chair.
"So last night I was hanging out with Kiba and he told me that Shikamaru's mom totally got a face – GAARA!"
Loud Naruto approaching. Bad mood increase by 15%.
"Hey, where were you yesterday?"
23%.
"I asked around, but no one saw you."
45%.
"I even went to Neji at lunch, but he was being all bitchy and wouldn't even answer my effing questions, you know?"
55%.
"Does he ever get that way with you? I mean when you guys are…well…you know?"
93%.
"Cause, I mean, that would be a total mood kill, right -"
"Naruto."
"What?"
Gaara stood up and glared at the boy hovering around his desk right in the eyes. He could see Naruto becoming a little bit unsure of himself, backing away slightly. "Just one piece of advice," the increasingly scary red head said quietly.
Before the blonde could react, Gaara full-arm punched him right in the face. Naruto fell into a group of desks, knocking several over. Gaara stomped over to where he fell and reached down to grab a fistful of his shirt, hauling him up so they were looking eye-to-eye.
"KNOCK BEFORE YOU GO THROUGH A CLOSED DOOR YOU FUCKING MORON!!!!!"
--
"Now here is a good romance."
"Eastern Promises. You think that Eastern Promises is a good example of a romantic movie?"
Pause.
"Yes, yes I do."
"Gaara, how in the fuck does that work?"
"Have you seen the movie?"
"Dude, I own it. We are watching it right now. Are you high or something?"
"No. And if you've seen it to the end, then you should know."
"Um, the end as in when neither of the characters get together and they part ways unhappily?"
"Unless there's another one I don't know about."
"How does that make a good love story in your twisted little mind? There's no sacrifice, no happy ending. They both just go back to the way it was in the beginning."
"Yeah, but, at least it's true."