Summary: Zoey is working with one of the hottest sophomores at PCA, Ryan Sharpe, on a World History project. But when he ditches her for parties, does she have any choice but to quit the team? Will she have to work with the most unexpected person just to get a passing grade? And why is everything she is supposed to be writing coming true?

Disclaimer: I do not own Zoey 101 or any of the original characters. Caylie, Ryan, Mrs. Dawson and some other students are my own creation, as is the plot.

Cold

Whack-a-Logan

"Life officially has a grudge against me," Zoey announced at lunch. She looked sadly at her oozing moussaka, picking at it halfheartedly with a white plastic fork.

"How?" Chase asked. "I mean, yeah, sure, Ryan, not the best partner you could have. But you'll get through it." Zoey glanced at him and shook her head.

"What do you mean?" Michael asked, sliding in next to Quinn. He had just arrived from French class and was carrying a lunch tray loaded with macaroni, soda, and fries. "Ryan n'est plus ton partenaire?" Lola shoved Michael and snatched two of his fries.

"Cut the quack, Michael. Speak in English." Quinn leaned in.

"He asked if Ryan wasn't your partner anymore." Zoey looked up.

"Oh."

"Well...?" Lola prompted. "Don't leave me on tenterhooks here, babe. Who's the new guy?" Zoey slammed her head on the table, narrowly missing her moussaka.

"Logan." Lola's eyes widened.

"Ohh...well, at least you'll have a chance to spar as much as you like. We all know you enjoy that." Zoey glared at her and quickly brightened her scowl to a fake, plasticized smile as Logan approached.

"So, Thomas Edison, huh, Quinn? Yeah, he was the guy who invented the lightbulb, am I right?" Quinn looked confused for a second, but she caught on as Logan approached.

"Yeah. I'm using some of his theories to create a new, energy-saving lightbulb that's supposed to glow in the dark. It absorbs all the sunlight that streams in during the day and when it's night...reflects it. Cool, huh?"

"Sounds like geek talk to me," Logan said, announcing his arrival. Zoey quickly snatched her lunch and stood up. "No, no, no. You don't have to stand up to pay homage to me, my lovely wife. Sit back down." Zoey glared at him and tossed her now-cold lunch away.

"No can do, Logan. And I was thinking more of a psychopath-jail guard kind of deal. Me being the jail guard, obviously. Or maybe a monster from outer space and a normal girl. Think about it. Wouldn't be too far-fetched. Actually sounds pretty realistic to me. Catch you later, guys." Logan smirked.

"She so wants me." Chase and Michael shared a look. Riiiight.

Zoey knocked on Chase's door. He opened it, his fluffy black hair obstructing any view she might have of within the room.

"Hey, Chase. I was wondering if Logan was here. I really don't want to fail this assignment, so I was kinda hoping we could work tonight. He in there?" Chase bit his lip and shook his head.

"Sorry, Zoe. Think he said he'd be out shooting baskets tonight. You can check the courts." Zoey nodded her thanks and left.

She saw Logan shooting baskets up ahead, missing every time.

"I thought Quinn helped you with your free throws, Logan." Logan gave her a sour look and shook his head.

"Yeah, she did. But now it's not working again."

"Oh." Zoey stood a minute before talking again. "About that project—I know we're not the best of friends, but I really don't want to fail. So I'm kinda offering a deal. You stop being an self-centered, conceited ass to me and my friends, and I won't diss you twenty-four seven. That all right with you?"

"Who said you diss me twenty-four seven?" Logan asked, outraged. Zoey looked at him, as if to say You know what I'm talking about. Shamed, Logan hung his head. "It's more like twenty-two seven." Zoey stayed a minute, playing with her hands, occasionally making the Awkward Turtle sign, having one hand over another and moving the thumbs into little circles.

"So...do we have a deal?" she asked. Logan raised his head, twirling the basketball in his hands.

"Shake on it." Before she could extend her hand, Logan pulled back. "One more thing, you don't diss me all the time, and also please lay off the Whack-a-Logan game you like to play." Zoey smiled good-naturedly.

"Consider it done."