um my attempt on humor. be kind.

The sound of a high pitch cry woke him up. Groggily, he looked at the alarm clock to the side of his bed and clicked on the light. He waited for his eyes to adjust before reading the time: 3:41 am. Turning off the light, he placed his head under the pillow, trying to block out the noise from the room next door. Hopefully, he'll be able to get back to sleep. The cries only became louder after every minute the neglecting father refused to get up.

"Woman!" Vegeta grumbled as he pulled the sheets to the side and got up. In the dark, Vegeta groped his way through the dark hall into Bulma's room. He didn't even bother to knock. A prince shouldn't have to wait for one's permission to do whatever. "Woman!" he called. The moonlight came through the window, spilling onto the bed…an empty bed. The bed sheets were nicely fixed, completely flat and neat, and on the pillow was a note.

To his chagrin, Vegeta knew that Bulma had suspected that he would enter her room; otherwise she wouldn't have left the note on her bed. 'Don't flatter yourself, woman,' he thought as he picked up the note. 'Hadn't that baby woken me up, I wouldn't have come here to wake you up to shut him up!'

The note said:

Dear Vegeta,

My parents and I had to leave on an urgent business regarding Capsule Corps. Please watch over the place and the baby. Remember, you have to feed him so he can live.

Love,

Bulma

Vegeta scowled. She made it sound like he didn't know what to do with a baby. Of course he knows to feed it! But hearing the cries now, he wouldn't mind it starving to death…

Crumpling up the piece of paper and throwing it aside, he walked out of the big room and into his baby's room. He switched on the light, noticing for the first time the color of his room. Purple.

'Is the woman mad?! Purple is not a boy's color!' Vegeta fumed. Putting such an issue aside, he walked over the crib where it harbored a crying baby. 'This boy must have gotten its lungs from itsmother. How else could it cry so loud!?'

"Hey," he said in a commanding voice, but the baby didn't seem to stop. It was set on ruining the rest of Vegeta's sleep. "Hey!" he said more forcefully. "Boy! Go to sleep!" The thing kept on crying. "I said go to sleep!" This time he said it a little too loud, scaring the baby into silence. "Good. Now go to sleep." He stepped back, watching the baby as he slowly turned to walk away as he walked backwards, but he stopped.

The baby was staring at him with wide blue eyes. It sniffed once, but the mucus slipped down his lips anyway, its small fists in balls, its bottom lip sticking out in a pout.

"What are you staring at, boy?" Vegeta said as he walked up to the baby. Then he saw the most amazing thing ever. A mucus bubble began to blow out of the tiny nostril of the baby. Amazed, Vegeta leaned closer when suddenly it popped.

'I must admit. That wasn't smart.' He thought to himself as he simply stayed in that position, with his eyes closed, trying very hard to control his annoyance from making him explode.

Suddenly, he felt something grab his face, and right when he opened his eyes, two little hands pulled on his face in different directions. Vegeta yelped in pain as he stepped back, but the baby only held onto his face, laughing in delight. With one hand, he held the baby, and with the other, pulled the tiny hands away from his face.

Holding the baby away in arms' length, Vegeta studied the baby. "Well, at least we have one thing in common: we find joy in the pain of others." The baby giggled, and Vegeta couldn't help but smile just a little. "You have strength, too."

He placed the baby back in the crib, but it only stood up with the support of the bars in the side. It held out a hand towards Vegeta, making a sound deep in its throat that Vegeta didn't understand. Of course he wouldn't understand. It was just a baby.

"No more playing, boy. Go to sleep." Vegeta said firmly. Right when he switched the light off in the room, the baby began crying again. Quickly, he switched the lights on, and the baby ceased its crying. "Fine. But as soon as you grow up, I won't allow you to sleep with the lights on. You'll learn to sleep in the dark. No son of mine will fear the dark when he's going to be trained to be one of the strongest warriors, even if he is half human."

But to his disappointment, as soon as he closed the door behind him, the baby began crying all over again.

"Kami! What will shut that baby up?!" Vegeta cursed aloud as he walked back into the room. He ran his hand through his hair with frustration. Eyes like slits, he looked down at the baby, who in turn, stared back at him. How do make a baby go back to sleep?

Then the idea hit him, although he didn't like it at all. He remembered a while back walking to the bathroom after one of his training sessions when he heard Bulma talking to the baby. It was absurd of course, to have a conversation with a baby when nothing understandable comes out of its mouth. 'Then again, I can't understand that woman either,' Vegeta confirmed. That night, wondering what in Kami's name could Bulma find to talk about with the baby, he stood outside the room to hear.

For fifteen minutes, he stood out there, listening to what he believed was…what did those earthling's call it? ...a bedtime story? Yes, that's it. It was something about a prince fighting an evil witch, who had turned into a dragon, to save the princess only to find her and the people in her castle asleep. What surprised Vegeta the most was that the prince had to simply kiss the princess to wake her.

"And they all lived happily ever after." Vegeta heard Bulma say. Unidentifiable movement was heard before the lights switched off and Bulma walked out, closing the door.

"So did the prince have to kiss everyone else so they call can wake up, too?" he asked, one thick eyebrow arched with mocking sarcasm.

Bulma had jumped with surprise, but immediately recognized the gruff voice. "Oh?" Bulma said as she perched on hand on her hip. "Were you actually listening?"

"I couldn't find anything to occupy myself with. Those robots in the spaceship with me are too weak to withstand my power. Fix it."

Bulma rolled her eyes. "For your information, buddy, I'm not your servant. You may have been a prince elsewhere, but on Earth, you're just like everyone else!"

"Oh, really now? Can anyone else besides me destroy this planet? Remember, that's what my original mission was; to blow up this stinking planet!"

"You would, but guess who stopped you? That's right, Vegeta, Goku did!"

Vegeta clenched his teeth together when Bulma realized she struck a nerve. She felt guilty immediately. "Look, I didn't mean--"

"As soon as I destroy those androids, I'm going to defeat Kakkarot. You understand me?!" he growled. He may have been short, but right now, he seemed to tower over her with a dark dominance.

Rage was in his eyes, and Bulma didn't want to push it any further. She gulped and nodded. He turned away, completely regretting ever listening to that stupid story…or even taking her offer to stay in this blasted dome shaped house.

"By the way," she said quietly, but he heard her. He paused and looked over his shoulder. She had an apologetic look on her face. "The prince didn't kiss everyone else. He didn't have to. As soon as he kissed the princess, everyone else woke up."

At first he looked nonplussed, but then he grunted and walked away, shaking his head. Bulma sighed, wondering if this argument had destroyed their relationship.

"That's a stupid story," he said as he paused at his door. "If you wanted to tell him a story about a real prince, tell him about me." Before he went into his room, he smirked at her. "Maybe this time, the baby won't fall asleep like he did in that--"

"Yeah, well, bedtime stories like those are meant to make baby's fall asleep!" she yelled at him, but was delighted by the fact that he was still talking to her. She folded her arms across her chest and humphed. "But I'll take your suggestion into some consideration. After all, it's probably the prototype of boringness anyway!"

"Quiet now," he said as he held a gloved finger to his lips, undaunted by her insult, "You might wake up the baby."

Now he stared at the baby, wondering if a bedtime story would indeed make this baby fall asleep.

"Once upon a time," Vegeta started, "A race called the Saiy-jins took over a planet called Tuffle, and renamed it after their leader, Vegeta, who became king of the Saiy-jins. He had a son, who he also called Vegeta. He was destined for greatness…"

Vegeta went on with his story, completely absorbed and actually liking this. He went on telling his victories as a child before he was taken away by Freeza who destroyed Planet Vegeta.

"The great prince then swore vengeance--" he looked down at the baby only to see it sleeping. He gritted his teeth together, completely irritated. 'Was that woman right all along?' he thought miserably. He hadn't even finish but the baby fell asleep anyway. He placed the blue blanket decorated with clouds on it over the baby, switched off the lights, and waited in case the blasted baby cried all over again. Satisfied with the silence, he closed the door behind him and went to bed.

He slumped onto his bed with a smile as if he finally got to go to sleep after weeks of working without a rest. Never before had he felt so happy to finally go back to sleep…

Um. Yeah, working on the other chapter.