1. When hes having an evil moment, ask him if its THAT time of the month.

2. Act like his mom and say, "If you eat all your veggies,I'll let you go out with your little death-eater friends on your killing spree"

3. Say "Havent I taught you anything, thats not how you torture a muggle!!"

4. When he gives you an order, say things like "Yes sir", "Right sir", "You got it sir".

5. When hes telling of how he got where he is, say things like "Hallelujiah" , "Praise the Lord", "so true", "thats unbelievable"

6. While hes giving instructions, start humming the Harry Potter theme song reeeaally loudly.

7. Say how come he doesnt have his own movie??

8. When hes instructing you personally, talk back to him with a really fake indian accent and insist thats not the way to speak the proper English.

9. When hes punishing a hostage in his dungeon, say "My grandma could punish someone better than you"

10. Shout during a death-eater meeting "The voices in my head say hi, Volders"

11. Throw him a surprise party celebrating the "Day he let the boy live". Give him a card that says, "To the Man Who Let The Boy Live. Dont feel too bad, WE still fear you"

12. Mail him hate mail and sign Lucius' name.

13. Send him a valentine and sign it "From your secret admirer. Look for me at the next deatheater meeting. I am the one wearing the black cloak and mask"

14. Follow him around like an announcer, say things like "Now hes turning left", "that was so unexpected." "Can he keep up with his surprises?" "Just what will he think of next."

15. Dye all the death-eater robes PINK.

(Suggested by: Ussagi811 - Afterwards, add flowers and invite the deatheaters to a tea party)

16. Walk up to him one day and say "I know this wonderful psychologist. He did wonders for me, maybe he can help you"

17. Say, "Voldie, you need to loosen up a little. Lets bake cookies and have a slumber party with your little death-eaters. They look like they could go for some stress relief too"

18. When hes annoyed by these and his face gets red, say " Ill go get you some Pepto Bismol, you look like you need it"

19. Organize a scavenger hunt around the headquarters and say "Its just like what you did with the horcruxes, isnt it?"

20. If he has failed on one of his killing-sprees, rub his shoulders and coo in his ear "Oh Voldie, had a rough night" (you can also say, "I knew you couldnt do it" and get your money from a fellow deatheater you made the bet with)

21. Say, "Wouldnt it be so much better for everyone if you just gave up and we all moved to the Bahamas. I hear theyre having a special on one-way group flights"

22. When he sends you on a mission, send him letters every day saying, "Voldie-poo, I miss you so much", "Voldie,I cant wait to see you again"

23. When he sends drinks around during a meeting, say "But Volders, I wanted a coke"

24. One day, walk up to him and say, "You should really think of getting a dog, you look lonely"

25. Say, "Volders, lets go clubbing. Im gonna get you hooked up for the night. If things come to it, Ill spike them with a love potion. You really need someone. I just hope the person doesnt go crazy with the amount of love potion Ill have to give them"

26. Walk around the headquarters with a video camera. Call the movie "The Days of the Torture of Voldemorts Face". Get many closeups for the beginning of the movie.

27. When you get an award for your movie, your acceptance speech should end "and last but not least, I would like to thank my tormentor, Lord Voldemort, because without his ugly face, none of this could be possible. Thank you"

28. When hes just about to fall asleep, shout outside his bedroom, "Good night Tommy, Dont let the bedbugs bite. you have your bunny Mr. Whiskers with you right."

29. When hes just about to leave for his killing-spree of the night, say "Could you pick me up a tub of ice cream on your way back. Thanks"

30. Say, "You so really think of painting these walls sunshine yellow, grey is so depressing, maybe even adding some paintings would help"

31. When hes instructing you say, "Oops, were you talking to me?". Do this several times.

32. Insist on calling him "Volders", "Voldie-poo", "Honey", "Baby"

33. When he talks to you, answer everything in questions.

34. When its snowing, go outside and get some snowballs. Run back inside shouting, "The British are coming. The British are coming". Proceed with throwing snowballs at them.

35. Make breakfast for Volders and put it in the shape of a smiley-face.

36. Bake him cupcakes and keep getting up in face to eat some. If he finally agrees (just to get you away), pick up one and shove it in his face. RUN!! You can proceed to do this to other deatheaters, if they are "willing".

37. In the summer, insists on the deatheaters to go on a vacation. The day they are supposed to get back, smash the place and say "Where have you been!!?? You just left me and then the Order came and ransacked the place. I was just lucky not to be found. How could you just leave me!!!" Start crying uncontrollably.

38. Insist on another vacation, this time go with them to Jamaica. Make a sandcastle and get Volders to come and see. Name the castle, "Lord Voldemorts Domain (actual size)"

39. Challenge him to a game of Quidditch.

40. When he loses, say things like "You tried your hardest... but IT JUST WASNT GOOD ENOUGH" Laugh in his face.