Read "A Little Bit Catty" before this one and blah blah blah. Beat on the brat, beat on the brat, beat on the brat with a baseball bat! If you don't know what song that's from, you are inept!!!

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter etcetera, because if I did Harry and Severus would fuck, Bill and Charlie would fuck, Remus and Sirius would, Fred, George and Draco would fuck, Dumbledore, Ron, Molly, Wormtail, and Hermione would die, and James and Lily would still be alive.


Harry was beginning to show and was ecstatic. Severus couldn't go a day without being reminded that Harry's extra weight was, in fact, a child they had created together.

"I hate children," Severus growled as he entered his rooms. He had just finished teaching a bunch of inept first years.

"Don't say that! You'll lower his confidence before he's even out," Harry snapped when he heard what Severus had said. "And you don't want that now do you?"

Whatever retort Severus had on the tip of his tongue, died. "He? We're having a son?" He asked, making sure he had heard his fiancé correctly. When Harry nodded, his mood immediately brightened, not that it was noticeable to anyone but his Soul Mate.

"Actually, we're having two, twins," Harry said and beamed at the longhaired man. He was completely overjoyed about the prospect of twins.

"Twins," Severus repeated and grinned. He had wanted a son, but he had never even thought he would be lucky enough to have two of them. Still smiling, he walked over and wrapped his arms around the cat-boy, kissing him softly. "Told anyone else yet?" He asked and when Harry nodded, his good mood took a nosedive.

Remus, Sirius, Fred, George, Draco, Lucius, Lily, and James all chose that moment to, in succession, to walk out of the fireplace. They were greeted by a death glare from Severus and a warm smile from Harry, the drastic difference between the two greetings made them wonder how the cat boy and the Potions master could be soul mates.

"Twins! I'm so happy for you Severus," Lily said and hugged Severus rather exuberantly. "What are their names?" She asked switching from Severus to glomp on Harry.

"I don't know yet, we decided to think of names once we knew what sex it, well they are," Harry said and lovingly stroked his protruding stomach. "I'll let you know as soon as we decided on names mom."

"Congratulations, Harry, Severus," Lucius said and gave Severus a reassuring, yet mocking smile. "Hopefully they take after Harry, I don't think the world could handle two mini-versions of you, Severus."

"Well one of you was too much, but then you went and had a son. It's only reasonable for me two have two sons just to counteract your and your son's grotesquely oversized egos," Severus retorted, everyone laughing at his humor.

Soon everyone found themselves seated around the room in a circle, sharing stories of their youth while Harry, Draco, and the twins listened intently. Severus was telling the story when he had made a flashing sign in Slytherin colors saying 'I was fucked by a Blast-ended Squirt and liked it' follow James around for a month before the Marauder even realized it was there, when Headmistress McGonagall flooed into the room.

"Poppy just told me the news Harry," McGonagall beamed as she stepped out of the fireplace. "Now, I have informed your other professors that if you suddenly leave in the middle of class without explanation to not take points or give you detention."

Harry smiled at her thoughtfulness, he was rather grateful she had done that, he didn't want to have to explain why he was leaving and suddenly barf all over his professor or something just as bad. "Thanks professor."

"Also, Severus, it would be best if you avoided teaching any dangerous potions until after Harry gives birth, that way nothing will happen if you suddenly need to leave class for Harry," she said sternly, her tone saying there was no way around her orders. "And, don't use this as a way to get a quick romp in."

"Yes ma'am," Harry said, even though he knew that they would use that as an excuse for a "quick romp" at least once. He glanced at Severus, who smirked, he was positive his fiancé was thinking the exact same thing.

McGonagall noticed the exchange and rolled her eyes. "And here I thought you had more control than that Severus."

"I don't know what you're talking about Minerva," Severus leered, his tone telling everyone he knew exactly what she was talking about but wanted to be difficult.

"Oh never mind. Harry, if for any reason Severus makes you angry, you can always come talk to me or stay in my rooms. Remus, you are not to be teaching until after you give birth, I will not have you stressing yourself, same for you Harry, nothing stressful," she ordered and with that, flooed back to her rooms.

xXx

Once everyone had left, Severus took Harry into their bedroom and made love to him so tender and gently, that the raven haired teen cried afterwards.

"Are you okay? I didn't hurt you did I?" Severus asked, wiping Harry's tears away, his voice dripping with concern and fear that he had hurt his Soul Mate in someway.

"No," Harry whispered as his tears stopped. "You didn't hurt me at all, it's just these damn hormones and that I love you so much," he said softly and curled up against his fiancé, relishing in the warmth the man put off.

Severus smiled softly and kissed the top of Harry's head, between those velvety ears. "I love you too," he whispered back and held Harry.

"What are their names?" Harry asked, looking up at his fiancé.

Thinking for a moment, two names stood out against thousands in Severus' mind. "Asphodel and Aries," he said, those names just felt right.

"Those sound perfect," Harry slurred sleepily before falling fast asleep in the raven-haired man's arms.

xXx

It was the weekend and Harry and Severus had planned on staying in and cuddling, well Harry wanted to cuddle and he was pregnant so Severus had no room to refuse, when there was a knock at the door.

Severus disengaged himself from a sleeping Harry and went to answer the door. The first thing that left his mouth when he saw who was at the door was a very loud "shit".

"Now Severus is that anyway to greet your brother?" The man asked, he looked almost exactly like Severus, only his eyes were bright blue and his nose tad bit smaller, other than that they could have been twins.

"Septus," Severus growled in greeting and reluctantly let his brother in. "Why are you here?" He asked as Septus surveyed the room.

Septus was about to speak when a groggy Harry walked out of the bedroom rubbing an eye with a fist and looking absolutely adorable in his sleep mussed clothes. "Now who do we have here?" Septus purred like a lion when a rabbit was in the den.

"My fiancé, Harry Potter," Severus growled and gave his brother a look that said 'touch him and I will kill you'. "Harry, this is my brother, Septus."

Septus looked the cat boy up and down and turned to his brother. "And you said you didn't like kittens," he smirked as he watched Harry straighten his clothes. "And a pregnant kitten at that."

"Hi," Harry said sleepily and went over to Severus, holding his hand. "I'm not a kitten," her grumbled, still looking absolutely adorable.

Septus and Severus both laughed at that. Their laughs were identical deep rumbling sounds; only Septus' didn't make Harry shiver in guilty pleasure.

"Noli nothis permitter te terere," Septus laughed and ruffled Harry's raven hair.

"Illegitimi non carborundum," Severus smirked, still remembering what he and Septus used to say when they were kids.

"You always were a bastard you know that," Septus laughed and was playfully hit in the arm by his brother. "Oh, yes, why I'm here. Do you think I would let my brother get married, finally, without his dear brother here now did you?"

Severus rolled his eyes, if Snapes were anything, they were Slytherin and that meant they almost always had ulterior motives to the one they said. "And why should I believe that oh dear brother?"

"Because what other reason would I have to come here? Can't really sell your boytoy, or shall we say kitty-toy, to the dark lord, since meow-mix here killed him," Septus smirked, he hadn't been a Death Eater but given the chance he would do anything for the right some of money…except hurt himself or his brother…too deeply. "Can't sell you off either, I mean who would want a snarky git like you, excluding catnip? I could be here to crash your wedding, steal your fiancé, and kill you, but would I gain, a trip to Azkaban and a pregnant hairball machine? I think not," he said with a grin. "I don't much like kittens."

Suddenly, without explanation, Harry bolted from the room.

"What's with him?" Septus asked and was answered by the sound of retching. "Ah, never mind," he said as his brother brushed past him.

Severus walked into the bathroom and closed the door behind him. Slowly, he rubbed soothing circles on Harry's back, his Soul Mate was prone to rather bad bouts of sickness after he woke up, it was rather taxing on them both. "Feeling better?" He asked when Harry had finished and he had cast a spell on the cat boy to clean the taste from the teen's mouth.

Harry wordlessly nodded before he stood on shaky limbs. "Being pregnant sucks sometimes," he said and scrunched his nose up in a rather endearing way. "But, it's worth it," the teen added, placing a hand gently on his no longer flat stomach.

"I think so too," Severus said and kissed Harry softly before opening the door to rejoin his brother. "I hope you didn't break anything while I was gone," he growled, startling his brother who had been holding something or another until he dropped it causing it to shatter.

"Well, just that," Septus smiled and cast a spell on the broken object causing it to repair and return to the shelf, "but that was entirely your fault. It's not nice to sneak up on people, especially people holding something breakable," he finished and made himself comfortable in one of the armchairs. "What, not going to offer me a drink?"

"Don't tempt me, my hand might slip and put a bit of poison in there just to shut you up," Severus growled and glared half-heartedly at his brother as he sat down on the couch. He and his brother always got along, having an abusive Father had brought them together at a young age and that bond had stayed through thick and thin.

Harry curled up under Severus' arm and watched the exchange. He was rather pleased that Severus actually had someone outside of the staff and himself that he got along with. "My names Harry," the cat boy said when Septus referred to him as "meow-meow".

"And mine is Septus, good thing we go that out of the way there fluffy," Septus smirked, but that smirk was quickly wiped off his face by his brother's glare. "I was only joking Severus. I'm sorry Harry, sometimes my humor gets the best of me," he apologized and shot his brother a forced grin, though he could apologize easier than Severus could didn't mean that he liked to.

Harry smiled in thanks and began to purr as Severus stroked behind one of his cat ears. Soon he had fallen asleep listening to the in-depth chatter of Severus and Septus."

"I can't believe you knocked up a fifteen year-old cat boy," Septus laughed when he noticed Harry had fallen asleep. "And James' son no less. I believe that now I can call you the randy brother."


Noli nothis permitter te terere- Latin for, "Don't let the bastards wear you down".

Illegitimi non carborundum- Is a bastardized version of the other one only it reads, "Don't let the bastards grind you down".

Hence the Septus calling Severus a bastard.

Anyway, Septus sounds a bit like Captain Jack Sparrow every now and again doesn't he.

Kevin: HI HI!!!

Alexander: Go away.

Kevin: He's just mad 'cause I tossed him into a snowdrift six feet high and he's only 5'1".

Alexander: The only reason you're still here is because you're warm and I'm cold.

Kevin: he's wearing my shirt with me still in it.