Warning this contains major spoilers for both the book and the musical.
"You know, Disney has never made a version of the Wizard of Oz." Said a man in a blue suit(From this point on, known as 'Mr. Blue').
His companion, a man in a brown suit(Mr. Brown), sighs. "I know. We could make so much money off of it!"
"Well, what do you say if we made a new version of the classic film?" Said Mr. Blue.
"I don't know... Couldn't we be sued?" Said the more-practical Mr. Brown.
"Maybe... I know! We can put a new twist on the story(that completely ruins the story, but makes it more appealing to the masses)!!!"
"But what?" Mr. Brown was confused. This was fairly common.
"Um... what about from... The Wizard's point of view?"
"No... He's an old man... Kids don't want to hear about him... What about... Toto?"
"The story would be just the same as before..." Mr. Blue said sadly. "I know! Glinda!!!"
"Hmm. Isn't there some play on Broadway that's about the Witches in the Wizard of Oz? W- something... I know, Wicked!" Mr Brown smiled. He liked Broadway. He had helped Aida be made.
"Ah... isn't Wicked based on a book?"
"I think so... Wicked, the Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West."
Two copies of the beloved novel appear out of thin air. Both men begin reading.
"Ah!" Yelled Mr. Brown. "This isn't a kid's book! They talk about sex, hermaphrodites, a corrupt government, and witchcraft! We can't market this toward children!"
"Perhaps," Said Mr.Blue, "We can change it... Make it kid friendly... Yeah. What should we cut?"
"I don't think kids would like the begining section. It's just about old people, talking about evil. And it implies adultery, and homosexual behaior. So we should cut directly to the Shiz section of the story."
"Good work! I think we need to include this part, but it needs cutting... Crope and Tibbett should just be friends... And we should cut all of the drinking... And we need to do something about that Philosphy Club... never get that past the censors..."
"Uh-oh! in the next part of the book, a Prince of all things has an affair with the Witch!"
"Well... Fiyero was forced against his will to marry Sarima... we'll just make her very rude and ugly... It'll make Elphaba look better. And they will NOT HAVE SEX! They will slowly become close friends, and one night, he will say something dashing, and kiss her... he will feel guilty about, though, and that's where it will end..."
"And then Elphaba will attempt to kill Morrible!"
"Oh, no... Um... how about she... is susposed to slip Morrible a poison apple! She IS a witch, afterall... But then she feels guilty about it, and leaves!"
"Wait, what about Liir? If Fiyero and Elphaba only kiss..."
"He'll just... not happen."
"Yes! And Fiyero will die- wait what about the Disney rule of only one character can die! Fiyero, Morrible, Dr. Dillamond. Ama Clutch, Melena, Nessarose, the Cook, Tibbett, Manek, Irji, Sarima, and ELPHABA all die!"
"I know! We can steal from the musical! Or just ignore the character."
"Wonderful... and in the end..."
An audience of children and parents enter a theatre... The lights go down... On the screen appears the film's title, Wicked, in large, curvy letters. In tiny letters underneath, reads 'based on novels by L. Frank Baum and Gregory Maguire. Also based on the musical Wicked' these credits are hard to read, and no one bothers.
We see Shiz University, a large school(that looks NOTHING like that Harry Potter novel...). We also see a pretty blonde girl. She looks a bit like Cinderella, but wih longer, curly hair, and green eyes. She is Glinda(Not Galinda, as that is confusing).
She enters the building. Madame Morrible is talking. Morrible is fat and ugly, so childeren will know she is evil. Many school girls are sitting around listening to her. One of them is Elphaba. Elphaba looks quite a bit like Belle, only with light green skin, and long black hair. Because, although she is susposed to be ugly, she isn't really, as then childeren would dislike her. In a bit of banter, to make it clear the Morrible is evil, and the girls don't like each other, Glinda and Elphaba are made to be roomates.
Time passes. Glinda is not very nice, as Elphaba needs a good reason not to like her. Boq, Avaric(who is mean and ugly), Crope and Tibbett(who are still comic relief, but are NOT gay), Nessarose(who is in a wheelchair, like the musical, as it's less disturbing than her being armless) and Glinda's friends(who are identicle, just wearing differant colors.) all attend school as well. Boq has a crush on Glinda.
Elphaba bonds with her professor, Doctor Dillamond, a goat. He is very nice, and she helps him. There are lots of jokes about him being a goat.
Fiyero enters. He is very handsome, a dark version of Prince Charming. Elphaba has a crush on him, although she never says anything to him, because he is going to be married. She does tell Glinda though. The girls bond, and are now best friends.
Doctor Dillamond is taken(stolen from the musical). No one does anything to help, but Fiyero does comfort Elphaba. He tells Boq(who is nice, and therefore his friend.) he wishes he was not engaged, so he could be with Elphaba.
Elphaba decides to try and find Dillamond, so she decides to go to the Emerald City. Glinda goes with her, for no real reason. The Wizard is scary, and evil. Glinda returns to Shiz, but Elphaba doesn't as now it's her life's goal to find and help Dillamond. Overtime, she begins to realize how evil the Wizard is.
Several years later, Fiyero is on a trip to the Emerald City. He is married to Sarima, and they have a daughter, Nor(Irji and Manek are ignored). In a picture, we see that Sarima is ugly, so she is atleast somewhat evil. He runs into Elphaba, and they become friends. In time he kisses her, but then feels guilty over cheating on Sarima. Elphaba then goes on a mission to kill Morrible. She gives her a poisoned apple, though she feels guilty and takes it back, and runs home. The next day in a newspaper, it says Fiyero has died.
Elphaba goes to Sarima, to apologyze, as she feels guilty over his death. Sarima is cruel to Elphaba, though little Nor, is sweet and pretty, and nice to Elphaba. Eventually, Sarima dies, and Elphaba becomes a mother to Nor. She also obtains the flying monkeys.
Nessarose becomes the Wicked Witch of the East. She is then sqwashed by Dorothy. We see Glinda(who has married Boq, as he is nice) Elphaba is very sad, and lashes out at Dorothy. She goes home. She does not want to kill Dorothy, she just wants the ruby slippers.
Dorothy meets the Tinman, the Scarecrow and the lion. The Scarecrow is very familiar. The Wizard tells Dorothy to kill Elphaba, the Wicked Witch of the West.
In time, Dorothy arrives. The Scarecrow tells her that Elphaba is alergic to water. Dorothy tries to kill Elphaba with water, but the Scarecrow nudges Elphaba into a trap door in the castle. She yells because she is surprised. Everyone thinks she died. Nor is sad.
In the end, the Scarecrow returns to the castle. It is revealed that he is Fiyero, and she is alive. They kiss, and in annimation surprisingly like Beauty and the Beast, he returns to himself, and she is now white instead of green. Nor is happy. Fiyero and Elphaba get married.
The End.