Summary: Tsunade seeks to play a prank on Naruto after he did one to her. She uses a genjutsu to make him fall for Sasuke, but something goes wrong.
Warnings: Just the usual M rated warnings- Yaoi (For those who don't know -sniff- it means Guy-on-Guy sex), Cussing, Blood, Lemon (Sorry if the stuff doesn't appear in this chapter, it just means that at one point in the story it will be there.)
Me: -typing happily-
Sasori: Hello
Me: Ahhh! What the hell! Where did you come from?
Sasori: Umm...I'm the guy in the story.
Me: -blank stare-
Sasori: What?
Me: -blinks-
Sasori: Ok fine I'm leaving
Me: Wait! Don't leave yet! I'm just confused. Why are you here?
Sasori: I'm your muse. I guess I'm supposed to entertain you or something.
Me: Is there anyone else?
Naruto: Noooooooooo!!!!!!!
Sasori: There's him.
Naruto: Why???????
Me: OMG! -hugs Naruto-
Sasuke: -death glare- GET...OFF...
Me: Eep Well thanks for coming guys but now I don't remember where I was.
Sasuke: Hn
Me: -pulls out Uchia-to-English dictionary- "Disclaimer?" Oh right!
Naruto: -jumping around- I wanna do it! I wanna do it!
Me: Um o...kay... knock yourself out
Naruto: Yay!
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto -sob-A/N Oh before I start I just want to say that Sasori is not that guy from the Akatsuki (I think I spelled that right) Sasori is my own character that I made up. He is blond haired, blue eyed and has black wings that he can put away and pull out to fly. I had named him and then realized that it was also a member of the Akatsuki but I like that name too much to give up -sob- If that bothers anyone...sorry! Oh and just to tell you, Sasori is a half demon is like the link between the demon realm and the human realm. He lives in Konoha to keep the most dangerous demon, Kyuubi, in check. Now on with the story!
"Talking"
Thinking
"Sasori thinking to people"
"Kyuubi talking"
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Tsunade blinked as she tried to clear the fuzzy image before her. Her head hurt like hell and she still couldn't see straight. She blinked a few more times and the room seem to stop spinning. Her office stopped its dancing and stayed still.
"My aching head!" she yelled in agony, wincing at the volume of her own voice. She lifted her head from her desk and looked out the window. Ah too bright! She closed her eyes and laid her head back down on the pile of paper on her desk. What happened?
After thinking for a few minutes she flashed her eyes open and grit her teeth, "Damned brat!" she yelled. She slowly rose from her desk to seek out some headache medicine.
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"Ahahaha! The old hag is probably waking up right now! Ahahaha!" yelled Naruto as he, Sasuke, and Sakura waited for Kakashi-sensei on the bridge.
"What are you talking about, Naruto?" asked Sakura from her place next to Sasuke. She released her hold on his arm just enough for him to shake her off. He slid away from her about two inches before she realized what he was doing. "Where ya going, Sasuke-kun?"
"Hn," was his reply.
"As talkative as ever, teme. Anyway! I put this pill in baa-chan's sake and she should be waking up by now with a huge headache. Haha!" Naruto told them through his fits of laughter. Sasuke and Sakura just stared at him.
"Why would do such a horrible thing you idiot!" Sakura yelled as she bopped him on the head.
"Itai! S-Sakura-chan, that hurt!" Naruto yelled as he nursed the back of his head. What neither of them saw, was the way Sasuke glared at Sakura and the way he flinched as she hit Naruto. That bitch! How dare she hurt my Naruto! Wait...Did...I just say...my Naruto? Eww! When did he become my Naruto? The dobe!
"Um...Sasuke? Are you alright?" Sakura asked him only two inches from his face. "You went all spacey on me for a minute there." Sasuke, suddenly realizing their proximity, violently shoved Sakura to the ground and returned to his normal bored expressionless face. He looked around and just examined the environment around them.
A shallow river ran underneath the bridge and many trees surrounded them as they were farther away from the civilized part of town. He looked up into the sky and saw three birds fly by. Why must everything run in threes? Can't it be just me and the dobe. I mean he is annoying and all but, Sakura is ten times worse. Ugh! There I go again with Naruto! Kami-sama! What is wrong with me?
"Hey Sasuke, you're thinking pretty loudly over there. You ok?"
"What?"Sasuke asked at the sudden intrusion. He looked to his right and saw that Sasori had finally arrived. "Tch it took you long enough."
"Hey hey hey. I don't see Kakashi-sensei so just keep your shirt on."
"Where is he anyway?"asked Naruto.
"You don't want to know" Sasori whispered irritably.
"Mmm...Kakashi," Iruka whispered defiantly as Kakashi proceeded to kiss him again, "Don't you have a squad to lead?"
"They can wait," Kakashi whispered back as he captured Iruka's lips once more.
"Nope, you don't wanna know..."
"Why not?" asked a curious Naruto.
"Well, you see, he's in a meeting with an adorable little dolphin," Sasori stated a-matter-of-factly.
"Haha very funny," Naruto stated sarcastically
I just wish they knew how true that really was.
One Hour Time Passage
"Where is Kakashi-sensei? He's later than usual," whispered Sakura, now seated on the ground next to Sasuke.
Sasuke repositioned himself on the railing of the bridge, "He better get here soon or else I'm leaving. I have more important things to do."
"Me too!" yelled Naruto.
"Hey guys," greeted a certain copy-cat ninja as he appeared.
"You're late!" both Naruto and Sakura yelled.
"WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?" asked Naruto
"Well you see, I was in a meeting with an adorable little dolphin," he answered as his eyes turned into upside-down U's. Everyone turned and stared at Sasori in disbelief.
"Told you so."
"Well I'm glad you could make it Sasori. I wasn't sure if you would've preferred working with us or not. Seeing as you are a jounin (is that spelled right?) and all."
"Hey, I might be a jounin but I'm still the same age as them. I like to have too, ya know."
"Of course, of course. Now we are going to be doing an exercise today since the Hokage hasn't been able to give out missions today," the copy-cat ninja began as he glared at Naruto, "Instead you three will be fighting against Sasori."
"WHAT!?!? ARE YOU NUTS SENSEI!?!? YOU EXPECT US TO FIGHT HIM!?!?"
"Naruto! Calm down and let me explain!" After Naruto had sufficiently calmed down, along with Sasuke's help when he threw him in the river, Kakashi finished his explanation, "Now I don't expect you guys to beat him or anything, seeing as he's already of jonin level and you guys are still chunin, but that doesn't mean you guys can't try to hit him at least."
"What makes you think they can?" Sasori interjected.
"I said try and hit you. Besides you won't kill them will you?"
"Of course not. They're not to die just yet." Sasori turned and smirked at the three who were all positioned on the railing by now with Sasori standing behind Kakashi. He slid the katana (for those who don't know, that's a sword that's about 40 inches long) out of it's sheath on his waist an inch.
"Stop teasing them, Sasori," Kakashi warned, "We haven't begun just yet." They all swear a smile appears underneath that mask of his. Creepy. "Now if you would all follow me to the lake them we can begin."
"That damned brat is really gonna get it this time, but what to do to him? Hm, it ought to be something extremely embarrassing that I can treasure for a lifetime (aka: blackmail). But what?" Tsunade strolled around her archives looking for the perfect jutsu to use. "I could make him grow a tail...nah. How 'bout I change his hair black. That would drive him nuts." She continued to scan through the various scrolls littering the room.
"No, I got a better idea. I'll make him fall in love with a certain black-haired ninja. Ha! That would be priceless! Now where is that genjutsu scroll. Ah here it is. Hm. This looks easy enough." After she had preformed the jutsu she sat down at her desk and sighed. Life was good.
Unfortunately she missed an important part of the scroll. The tiny warning on the very end saying: "Do not preform in the presence of a full moon, may have bizarre effects."
And sure enough, tonight was the full moon.
Me: Well how was that for a start?
Sasuke: Hn.
Me: -pulls out Uchia-to-English dictionary, again- "It was terrible?"
Sasuke: Hn
Me: Oh you're just mad cause you didn't get to pound Naruto into a bed, or a table, or a couch, or a-
Naruto: -covers my mouth- Stop! You're giving him ideas.
Sasori: -sniggers-
Naruto: What's so funny?
Sasori: You seemed to like the idea of doing it on the table.
Naruto: -blushes profusely- S-So.
Me: How do you know?
Sasori: I can read minds -wink-
Me: Ok ignoring that. I hope you guys liked that. If there are any spelling mistakes or you guys have any suggestions just let me hear them! But it's my first fic, so please don't flame. If you do...I'll-I'll use them to make a Sakura bonfire! (No offence to those who like her)
Naruto: Sadist
Me: Oh you give me too much credit!
Sasori: Since they aren't going to ever end this, I guess I will-
Me: Ja!
Sasori: -death glare-