It just tired him one day.
He had thought that he could keep it up forever, for years and years and the eons to come. But when the day arrived he got up and decided it was just too long. It had been too long. He had done it for years and years, but not yet in eons; after the long period of time the routine just got stale. Not really stale, but it failed to interest him any longer.
He got up from his bed, stretched and yawned a bit, and walked out into his very own complex.
It wasn't a huge complex – it was humongous. One of the largest residences to ever grace the Village's territories – it was one of the few main perks he obtained when he was announced as the Sixth successor. But even though its expanse was huge, its occupants were few. Just himself, a handful of assistants and maids, that's all. His friends had all prodded on him when he was a few years younger that he should go and search for a wife, but back then he was still up for his routine, waiting, and waiting and waiting…
"Good morning, Hokage-sama." Said a youthful maid as he walked past her; he stopped briefly and returned the greeting. "Your breakfast is ready now."
"Is it, Mio-chan?" he smiled, his cheeks pushing his trademark whiskers up as he did so, "Thank you."
The maid – Mio-chan – smiled and looked a little flustered before scurrying off to fix her master's bedroom.
He sat himself down his usual dining area and relished in the morning meal his staff had prepared for him. Today was going to be a good day, he decided – even though his staff had prohibited him from eating ramen, they served him his favorite dish at the very start of the day. Something must be up.
"Good morning, Hokage-sama," said another of his assistants, elderly in age. He smiled towards her when she came scuffling in. "Are you enjoying your breakfast?"
"I am, Mihano-san, very much so." Naruto slurped his noodles, chomped, and forgot his manners. "I thought you resented the idea of me eating ramen. And now you give me some of it for breakfast. What's up?"
The elderly Mihano only smiled and patted the Sixth Hokage's head fondly. As she did, she felt a pang of guilt tug at her heart. How could we have hated a boy like him…
"Oh it's nothing, Hokage-sama. Thought you would've liked it." She said, her voice slightly cracking and shaking in a few places. That was the way old people's voices sounded like, anyway. Mihano made a face. "But no more ramen for the rest of the year."
Naruto almost choked on his noodles when he heard what she had said. Cackling an old lady's laugh, she gave the man a pat on the head and scurried off as well.
He knew why they were being so nice to him today. Normally at the thought of having ramen for breakfast Mihano would've screamed at him, saying that it was no good way to start the day. He'd argue that it was his house and that he was Hokage; she'd retort with something like it wasn't good for a Hokage to be a bad example to the kids, and somehow within the argument Mio would be laughing, with the Hokage reduced to an apologizing heap as Mihano would angrily place a proper meal before him. But not today, not on this date. For the past three years they had been especially nice on him on that day; part of him resented it, while the other appreciated it.
When he had bid his goodbyes to the house's caretakers he left for the tower, and was greeted by Moegi.
"Hokage-sama," said Moegi, hair parted into two ponytails which waved as she trotted behind Naruto, "I've received word from Tsunade-sama – she's coming in this afternoon. She wants you to prepare for her welcome."
Naruto made a sound as he opened the door to his office. "'Ch. Meaning I have to be with Tsunade-baa-chan all day, I guess."
"No," said Moegi. She scrutinized him with her eyes, putting her hands on her hips as she held a clipboard. "Tsunade-sama has stated only a proper welcome; you, meanwhile, have to finish your paperwork and go to the Uchihas later. Sakura-san has come by to remind you of it."
Naruto pushed his pointy had aside and sat on his chair. "Ah, she has, has she? Anything else from Sakura-chan?"
"Nothing more, just a reminder for you to come later on." Moegi said. "Please, boss, do your paperwork, it's really starting to stack up."
Naruto nodded, with a grin on his face. Her using 'boss' really brought back memories. "Fine, fine. Bring me Ichiraku ramen later on in exchange, alright?"
Her face brightened up. She knew that when ramen got mixed into the deal he was practically hooked in. "Alright, Hokage-sama."
And with those words, she left.
This day again today, eh? Naruto said to himself, crossing his ankles and eyeing his paperwork. They really were beginning to stack up. They even looked like they were going to cave him in.
Two raps sounded against his office door.
Naruto looked up from a report concerning a D-mission of a team of genin hired to catch a chicken gone wild and stared at his door. With a few words the door was opened, and in came Moegi with a usual pink-haired guest.
"Hokage-sama, Uchiha-san is here to see you."
"Let her in."
Moegi closed the door as soon as his former teammate entered his room. Carefully avoiding the trash that littered the office floor (Kakashi had made note that it was somehow no different back then during the Yondaime's reign), the pink-haired jounin settled herself on a chair near his desk.
"Naruto," she started. Clearly she was here on personal business. Otherwise she would've addressed him with a sharp 'Hokage-sama' "Moegi-chan has already told you, I suppose? Of tonight's affair?"
"She has mentioned something like that to me, yes," Naruto noted. He let go of the chicken-capture report and leaned back on his swiveling chair. Sakura furrowed her eyebrows together.
"We want you to be there, Naruto –
"Don't worry," he cut her off, grinning. It hurt like hell, though. "I'll be there, I promise."
"You didn't come last year."
He sighed. Clearly he was tired, yet he made no move to betray it. "Sakura-chan, I told you, I was called to Sunagakure – an impromptu meeting was held. You know that. Even Shikamaru wasn't there at your place last year. It was official business." He placed his chin on his palm. "Why won't you believe me? You know I won't lie to you Sakura-chan. I never will."
Somehow one lie after another – well, not really lies. Technically they weren't. He made it official (through his Hokage prowess) as he whisked himself off to Sunagakure a year ago. Shikamaru tagged along since he thought it'd be helpful, to make his scheme more believable. That, and for Temari to see her brothers again. He whisked her along too.
She held a stern gaze. "I…" her voice softened. "It's just, I want you to be with us, you know? To celebrate. Lately you haven't been around. Or maybe you've just been cooped up here too long."
"I think it's a matter of both." Naruto grinned again. "I'll be there, Sakura-chan. I promise."
The furrowing of her eyebrows ceased. She smiled a soft smile.
"Be sure to be there, or else you won't have ramen for dinner."
Ramen? For dinner? Mihano would surely lose her screws when she hears about this one.
"You know that with ramen in the mix, you got me hook, line and sinker, Sakura-chan." He winked. She laughed, patted him on the head (which sent his chin hitting the tabletop), and exited his office in a flurry of a dull red dress.
Naruto sighed. He told himself that he was tired of it already, yet somehow it was swimming back to the surface.
"You look like shit."
She took her small cup of tea – it was enticingly fragrant – and took a sip, sitting on a square cushion Mihano had just given her earlier. She leaned back on one hand and surveyed her successor, eyeing him from head to…well, up to what part she saw him.
"Thanks, Tsunade-baachan. Why, you look like shit yourself." He sniggered.
"Some mighty piece of shit, I say." Tsunade grinned. "But seriously, you look really tired. Are you not doing well with the job? I thought you wanted it, you know. That's why I gave it to you."
"No, it's not the job." Naruto replied, turning to look at an aged Tonton. Shizune was absentmindedly stroking his head as she listened to the Rokudaime. "It's nothing. I guess just stressed, that's all."
"Mmhmm." Tsunade replied. She chose to pry no further – Naruto'd tell her once the time would feel right. She took another sip of her fragrant tea and listened to the whimpers of her pet pig.
"But you've really grown, Naruto," Shizune suddenly said. "When I look at you in your robes you look like the Fourth in more ways than one."
Tsunade only murmured something against the rim of her cup. The night was silent as they spent it within each other's company.
She loved him like a brother. No – she loved him more like a son. He was the brother that she had once lost, the son that she never had. It pained her to see him reduced to a state. Exalted in power, yes, but in some way he was reduced back to the ways when he was a child. Of course as he grew, he learned how to mask them – his sorrow, his pain. They weren't as big of a problem as those he had shouldered years back. But somehow, in some way, she knew that those pangs of loneliness and disappointment were surfacing. The feeling of failure … it was in a small scale, but she could still see it reflected in his eyes. He cast his guard lower when he was alone. When he was with her, or with people…people he was comfortable with, and people who knew.
I wanted everything to go right for you. She thought bitterly. Her lips left the warm rim of her teacup. I did everything in my power for them to go right for you. And yet…fate knows how to be cruel.
"I think it's about time we went there," she heard Naruto's voice say. "Don't you think so, Tsunade-baa-chan? Shizune-san?"
Another twinge of pain stabbing at her heart.
Somehow, I wanted you to have what I lost back then. But…you never did.
She took one last sip and stood up, blonde pigtails waving.
"Sakura'd better make sure there's a lot of sake."
He had been waiting for so long. He had hope in him. He had the inspiration and the drive to do what was needed. But he wasn't doing it all for her – he was also doing it for himself, as well. Because he wanted to be better, to prove to the world that he wasn't the dobe that that teme proclaimed him to be. He wanted to be proud of himself and of his works, and make his friends proud of him, too. He wanted to be acknowledged and be recognized. Call it selfish, but it was justified. And of course, he wanted to be acknowledged by her.
During their first day as a team, he was delighted to know that they had something in common. At first he thought it as impossible – she was smart and beautiful. Her forehead was cute. He, meanwhile, was an idiot, prankster and well, scruffy. But when he learned that she wanted to be acknowledged (so what if her goal was to be recognized by that teme? they still wanted the same thing in some sense), it somehow added fuel to his fire. They wanted the same thing. Maybe they could work together to attain their goal.
But…somehow, he was failed. And he had tried to do everything in his power, too, on that fateful day by the gates. When he flashed her his smile, had his thumb up, ridiculously posing there as his heart was being shattered. No matter. This was for her. He didn't matter at the time. Besides, somehow, he wanted that stupid bastard back, too. Who was he going to fight with, to be rivals with?
And then, he came back. Empty-handed, carried on the shoulder of his teacher. Bruised, battered, worn, sliding in and out of consciousness; barely breathing, they said. When he woke up, he saw her, and she told him that next time, they'll do it together.
He left, and when he came back, he felt as if he was on the winning side. They were great friends, now, and she knew of his dreaded secret, and accepted him as he was. He tried to avoid her crying because of his state, but she defied and told him that she was worried about him. Told him that she couldn't bear thinking that all the while he had this thing inside of him, a monster. She was crying tears of sorrow and pain for him. He felt touched, felt loved and felt appreciated by her tears. And as time passed, as they spent more time together, in sync, he felt as if she was recognizing him already. That she was acknowledging him. And that in some way, she was starting to like him more as a friend.
He thought she was starting to love him, the way that he loved her.
Years passed, and then the time came. They found him, that bastard, and he had to make sure he was the one who was going to make him cross the threshold. He went, fought, and dragged the Uchiha back to where he came from. He felt relieved and proud. He didn't break his promise. But she broke his heart, instead.
He thought he was on the winning side. He thought that she was starting to love him the way that he loved her. Maybe she's starting to acknowledge me, the way I want her to see me, he had thought. But she proved her thoughts otherwise. When he had walked to the gates, dragging a half-dead Uchiha (he was half-dead in some senses too), he wasn't really surprised when the first thing she hurried to was him. After all, the black-haired bastard was knocked out cold and he was still standing. It was logical that she'd run to him.
But that was when things spiraled down into chaos, for him.
He had thought wrong. He wasn't on the winning side. He was never on the winning side. Because no one replaced that teme in her heart. Even if he thought he had, he wasn't able to.
No matter how much of himself he gave to her. No matter if what was left of him was nothing.
She…she'd still run to him.
I'm tired of it.
After all, he was human. Sure, with a monster inside.
But he – he was still human.
--
Shikamaru took a long draught of his sake as he stood by a wall, talking with Lee and Kiba about the recent goings-on in Konoha. He was waiting for the Hokage to appear – there would be no excuses this time, he thought, for even the Uchiha patriarch dropped by the office to ensure that their blonde-haired teammate would show up. There was no orchestrated escape to Sunagakure this time.
He felt bad for the guy, honestly. He had known Naruto for years and years, almost as long as he had known Chouji, and had grown quite close to him as the years passed. Even closer when he realized what was eating Naruto inside. It started three years ago, on that very day, when she said 'I do', and the rest was history.
Sometimes he berated Naruto for having too much faith. Too much drive, too much hope. Too much reliance on his dreams and aspirations. Sure, he did make it to Hokage, and he was the youngest Hokage to take seat (the Fourth was the second youngest now), and back then he ran on his dreams and aspirations. He defeated people and accomplished feats because of his dream. But when Sasuke came back, the blonde's dreams and aspirations were somehow reduced of one.
Sometimes Naruto was too principled. No, he'd tell them (including Lee, Kiba, Chouji and Neji), I can't, she loves him more than me. I should make her happy. And when they told him that he should go search for a wife, he waved the proposition off. We'll never know, he'd say with a grin. Maybe she'll change her mind and go to me, instead, eh? And then he'd finish it off with a laugh.
But she never did. And after three years, the two got married. The night after he and Chouji managed to find Naruto slumped against the walls of the Hokage manor, staring idly at the floor.
I don't want to do this anymore, he had said to them in a cracked voice. I'm tired.
They knew what exactly he was speaking of.
Shikamaru took a side-glance and sighed. Temari was chatting with Ino and Tenten and Hinata; Sakura and Sasuke were talking with the Haruno, Sakura's parents. And a black-haired, green-eyed toddler was playing with his also black-haired but darker-green-eyed daughter, whose hair was up in pigtails.
"Shouldn't Naruto-kun be here by now?" he heard Lee question.
Neji decided to answer. "Late probably because of certain duties. It's understandable."
As if right on cue, the sliding doors of the Uchiha household slid open and revealed two people. Three, if you count the blonde in the white coat standing behind them. Four, if you count the pig.
Naruto grinned as he sighted his former teammates. "Happy anniversary, Sasuke, Sakura-chan."
--
It was well into the night when he appeared in front of his house. Mihano and Mio and the rest of his staff were probably asleep, but there was a lantern sitting idly by the main doorstep. He had come back alone; Tsunade and Shizune opted for an inn and declined his offer for them to stay at the manor.
"Tiring day, Hokage-sama?"
He looked up from taking off his boots to the gentle smiling face of his caretaker.
"Yes," he murmured, voice strained.
Mihano knew of her master's pains.
"…very much so."
But even if he was tired of it, he decided, it'll still be there.
Inspired by Dr. Destructo's Seduce my Wife!.
Naruto © Kishimoto Masashi.
Disclaimer: Did for pure entertainment, enjoyment, and not for profit.
Notes: A little Naruto angst. :D Hope you enjoyed. R+R appreciated. :D Mihano and Mio owned by meh. :D