Disclaimer: Honey and Clover isn't mine.

Haircut

"But your hair is so long and beautiful," the elderly hairdresser ran gentle fingers through the long golden locks that their owner had just requested to be cut off. "It would be a shame to remove nine or ten inches from it, Ayu."

Yamada Ayumi stared at her reflection on the mirror. She stared at the hair she had grown for so long, for so many years. "It's alright, auntie," she fingered the strand that sat over her shoulder. "I've decided."

"Well, it's your hair."

Ayu winced as the hairdresser gathered up her hair and picked up a pair of scissors.

"I guess you'll want me to get this over with quickly," the hairdresser said sympathetically as she put down the scissors in favor of a large razor. "So, if you're sure about this whole thing, here we go."

Ayu nodded.

The razor made a ripping sound as it cut through the long blond strands. Ayu felt the tug at her scalp...

...and a little bit of pain.

When I was a child, I learned to associate long hair with being beautiful. I thought that if I grew my hair long enough, I would be beautiful and could catch the attention of any man I desired. "They would fall in love with me because of my beautiful hair," I used to think.

"Ayu! You cut your hair!" the Hanamoto Hagumi's child-like voice was filled with astonishment when she saw her dear friend walk into her uncle's office.

Said uncle couldn't resist to raise his head from his work at the announcement. "Oh. You cut it quite short," was all Hanamoto Shuuji managed to say. It wasn't that short hair didn't suit Yamada--it was just a bit strange looking at her like this.

Ayu blushed and self-consciously tucked a lock of hair behind her ear, but because her hair was much shorter than before, there wasn't enough weight to keep it there. "Is it awful?" she asked as the curtain of hair fell back over her cheeks.

"No, it looks great!" Hagu reassured her.

Hanamoto opted to add in his own compliment, "Yeah, you look real pretty, Yamada."

"Thanks," Yamada smiled sadly. This time, even if she lowered her gaze a little bit, her hair couldn't hide her betraying eyes so Hanamoto --and even Hagu--could see that she was longing for someone else's approval.

It was at that moment that the door chose to slide open.

In Yamada's mind it was him coming in. He would pause by the door at the unfamiliar girl standing in the room. Then, he would realize that it was just Yamada standing there. Then, he would fall in love with her at that moment...

But, it wasn't him. It was Morita Shinobu and he was staring at Yamada blankly.

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Morita screamed--successfully making both Hagu and Yamada scream--when he recognized his friend. "What happened to your hair?????!!!!" He then produced from nowhere a mess of straw-colored string and proceeded to try to attach it to Yamada's head while saying, "Thiswillhavetodo.It'sgottobeheresomewhere.PutthisonwhileItrytofindthemonsterwhodidthistoyou..." like a possessed man.

Luckily, Yamada could hold her own and managed to land a kick on Morita's head that successfully quieted him down. She panted heavily as her panic from Morita's own panic faded. Meanwhile, Morita's spirit began to float away.

"You two really are a bit excessive, aren't you?," Hanamoto commented as a mortified Hagu caught sight of Morita's spirit. Hagu grabbed the wayward spirit and began stuffing it down the unconscious boy's throat.

As I grew older, I realized that love was more complicated than that. A man couldn't fall in love with a woman just because she had long beautiful hair, but, for some reason, I couldn't let go of the hope that maybe it really was as simple as that.

"Oh, Yamada," Miwako greeted the young potter when she walked into Fujiwara design's office to deliver their latest order. "If it wasn't for that pot you were carrying, I wouldn't have recognized you."

I recognized her! Leader barked happily as he sniffed the newcomer in confirmation.

"Your new hair suits you," Miwako added to her earlier statement as she petted her dog, directing its attention to her.

"Thank you," Yamada said, turning a bit pink. Again, there was that painful tug on her chest.

Nomiya Takumi, who was taking the pot from Yamada smiled charmingly. "You look beautiful like that."

The flush on Yamada's cheeks deepened. "Thanks."

Miwako, over on one side, smiled knowingly when she saw the younger girl's reaction.

I couldn't let go.

"Why did you do it, Yamada?" Morita asked as he and Yamada watched the sunset from the rooftop of the university building.

"Why?" Yamada felt the shorter ends of her hair. She thought about her reasons, but couldn't come up with a concrete answer. "Don't you like it, Morita?"

"I know why you cut your hair," Morita revealed, ignoring his friend's question. "It's because of him, isn't it?"

Yamada's eyes widened a fraction, knowing full and well that the stress on the 'him' meant Morita was talking about Mayama Takumi. There was that pain again: that very same pain that she had felt when she first felt the blade cutting her hair. "To be honest, I'm not sure."

Morita just looked at her, studying her closely. The intensity of his gaze made Yamada unable to look at him directly, so she focused her eyes at the darkening horizon.

"Maybe you're right. Maybe I did cut my hair because of Mayama, then again, maybe not."

They were silent for a while, until Morita spoke up, "You look better, now. There aren't as many shadows hiding your face."

"Morita..." There was no pain this time. Yamada suddenly felt light, even a bit dizzy from the high of a sudden realization that she had yet to process. No more shadows...

Morita tapped her chin up with his forefinger so she would look him in the eye, "But, you have to smile more often, now. Your hair can no longer hide your sad face."

It was that very scene, with their faces so very close like that, almost as if about to kiss, that Mayama chanced upon when he opened the door that led onto the rooftop. "I'm sorry, excuse me."

"Mayama!" Morita exclaimed in his overdramatic comic manner, as he jumped away from a still dazed Yamada. "It's not what you think!"

"Mayama?" Yamada spun around and her eyes met her unrequited love's own.

Mayama blinked. "Yamada?" he forced himself to glance over at Morita. "Mr. Hanamoto wanted me to tell you that the sukiyaki party is starting. I already brought the meat."

"Come on!" Morita took Yamada by the hand and dragged her into the building. "Sukiyaki!"

"Sukiyaki!" Yamada cheered as she caught up.

Mayama followed after them, left alone with his own thoughts. I liked your long hair, Yamada, but you look good.

Even though I knew I had to, it was still difficult to let go of the childish idea. I needed something to remind me that love was complicated and life wasn't perfect. Mayama would never fall in love with me, even if I had long hair.

I remember that now, every time I look into the mirror.

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Author's Notes:

That concludes my first Honey and Clover fic. I hope no one kills me for cutting off Yamada's long locks. Since I watch the dubbed version, I'm not completely sure how the characters address each other, so I stuck with the dubbed version's names.

Please give me a heads up if the characters are OOC.

Reviews, even critical ones, are appreciated and even encouraged.

Hope someone liked it.

-paris