A/N Okay everyone I'm warning you right now that this story comes with a major BYOT (bring your own tissue) warning... This story is way out of my normal sphere of writing and is possibly the saddest thing I have ever written...I was having a bit of a writer's block and when I finally started writing, this is what came out...I honestly have no idea what got into me...And a huge thank you to my beta Jamie for all her help!
Harry whipped his head around quickly, desperately searching the battle field for the flash of red hair that would signal the location of his beloved whom he had been separated from in the melee. Finding her fighting several Death Eaters at once, he rushed over to her aid. She was holding her own just fine, but with his assistance, the masked men were quickly dealt with.
"You alright?!" he asked over the noise of shouted curses and explosions.
"Yeah!" Ginny shouted back as she jogged towards him, giving him a quick kiss when reached him. "Now let's kick some more masked ass!"
"That's why I love you," he joked as he reached for her hand.
"The only reason?" she asked as she interlocked her fingers with his.
"No, just one of the million."
And together they ran into the heart of the battle.
let's dance in style let's dance for a while
heaven can wait we're only watching the stars
hoping for the best but expecting the worst
are you gonna drop the bomb or not
Harry leaned forward and brushed the damp hair off of Ginny's tired but contented face. She moved even closer to him, wanting to feel his bare skin against hers as they lay together under the stars and a light blanket in one of the far fields of the Burrow.
Neither of them spoke, not wanting to break the contented silence as they caught their breath in the aftermath of their passion for each other. Their love making had held a note of desperation to it, as they clung to each other, both thinking what neither dared say. That this might be the last night they were together.
let us die young or let us live forever
don't have the power but we never say never
sitting in the sandpit life is a short trip
music's for the sad man
The battle raged on as the couple made their way through the crowd, taking part in the different skirmishes as they passed comrades in need of help. But all the while they were making their way up toward the hill top where Voldemort was presiding over the combat.
"Hey, have you seen Ron and Hermione?" Harry asked as they ran.
"Yeah, they're over there," Ginny replied, pointing up ahead of them.
Harry followed her line of sight until he caught sight of his two oldest and best friends in the world. He was just admiring their wand work when he saw a Death Eater sneak up behind the couple.
"WATCH OUT!!!" he screamed to Hermione.
But it was too late. Their resident bookworm turned just in time to see the green light rushing towards her. Ron, hearing Harry's warning, retaliated in kind, killing the man who had just done the same to his girlfriend. But the Death Eater he had been battling previously took advantage of his distraction, felling the redhead while his sister and best friend watched on helplessly.
Harry froze in shock as he realized that the first two people that he had considered his family were now dead. A part of him wanted to just sink to his knees and wait for it all to be over. He could feel the bile rising out of his stomach when a petite hand rested on his shoulder. He turned to look down at Ginny, who was visibly fighting back tears.
"We have to keep going," she said softly.
Harry simply nodded in response, swallowing the lump that was forming in his throat. To an outsider, the couple may have seemed cold and unfeeling as they turned away from where their friends and family had just fallen, but that was far from the case. It was just that both knew there would be time to grieve later. Right now they had a war to finish and it was with new vigor and resolve that the pair launched back into the battle.
can you imagine when this race is run Harry shifted so that he was laying back down with one arm behind his head as a pillow. With his other arm he pulled Ginny close to him so her head was resting on his chest. "Comfortable?" he asked as he ran his fingers through her long auburn hair. "Very," she replied with a contented sigh. "I wish we could stay like this forever." "We will," Harry replied. "You're not getting rid of me anytime soon," he joked lightly. "I'm sure I could figure out the secret to the Sorcerer's Stone." Ginny chuckled before her mood became more somber, "No, I'm not saying that I want to live forever. I just wish this moment, this night could last forever. Just like this, just the two of us. That we could stay young and happy and we wouldn't have to grow old or go through a war and see the people we love and care about die." "I understand, but at least after tomorrow it will be all over and then we can work on making every night as special as this one. Because even though I can't keep us young forever, I can't think of anyone I would rather grow old with," he replied. "Thank you." "You're welcome." "Harry?" she asked, lifting her head so that she looking at him. "Yes, Ginny?" he replied. "I love you," she told him. "Always and forever." "Always and forever," he repeated, as was their tradition. And with a smile she laid her head back down on his chest so that she could listen to his heart beat while he watched the stars.
turn our golden faces into the sun
praisin our leaders, getting in tune
the music's played by the mad men
forever young, I want to be forever young
do you really want to live forever
forever, forever
The couple ran through the battle field towards the hill where Voldemort was making his stand, darting in and out of different duels and stand-offs using trees, boulders or whatever other obstacles they could use as cover on the way.
They were able to make their journey mostly unharassed, as everyone on both sides was otherwise occupied. The couple was making the short dash from a large bush to a nearby tree when a rouge curse flew past Harry's shoulder. He turned around to remark to Ginny on the close call just in time to see the very same curse come in full contact with the redhead's chest.
The expression on her face could only be described as a mix of shock and confusion as the impact of the curse knocked her off of her feet and into the air where she flew for what seemed like an eternity, during which Harry stood frozen, watching in utter horror.
She hit the ground with a sickening thud that made Harry's blood run cold.
"GINNY!!!"
forever young, I want to be forever young
do you really want to live forever
forever, forever
Harry could sense that Ginny was drifting off to sleep, but before she did, he had something he wanted to do first. She grumbled a weak protest when he pulled away from her in search of his coat.
"Harry, what are you doing?" Ginny asked, watching him curiously, as she propped herself up on her elbows, wondering what he could be searching for.
"Ginny," Harry asked, pulling a small, square, velvet box out of a pocket and opening it, revealing a stunning solitaire marquee diamond with the inscription Always and Forever on the inside of the platinum band, "will you marry me?"
Ginny couldn't help but gasp as she took in the gorgeous ring. Before she could speak, Harry was sliding the ring onto her finger and she was watching the way it sparkled in the moonlight. After gazing at it for a long moment, she slid it back off her hand.
"Harry, are you just proposing because you are afraid both of us might not make it through tomorrow?" she asked quietly, holding the ring to her chest.
"Of course not," he quickly replied.
"I'm just worried that tomorrow, once everything is over you might regret this, that you might feel like this is too soon," Ginny explained
"No, Ginny," Harry said resolutely. "I love you, I want to marry you and spend the rest of my life with you."
"Alright then," Ginny said equally sure of herself as she handed Harry back the ring, "then give this back to me tomorrow night. If you still want to ask me to marry you after the final battle is over, then nothing would make me happier than to marry you."
Harry wasn't thrilled to take back the ring, but if this arrangement made Ginny happy then he would gladly hang onto the ring for one more day. Then he could put it on her finger, knowing that she would be his for the rest of their lives.
some are like water and some are like the heat,
some are melodies, some are the beat,
sooner or later they'll all be gone,
why don't they stay out
Harry sprinted to Ginny's side, oblivious to the battle that still raged around him.
"Ginny!" he choked out, the terror in his voice clear as he took up her unmoving hand. "Are you alright?"
Ginny opened her eyes and looked at Harry's worried countenance. "I'm dying Harry," she told him simply.
"No, you're not," he replied. "We don't even know what curse you were hit with. I'm going to get you out of here and you're going to be fine."
"No," she countered shaking her head sadly, as her fingers and toes began to tingle painfully as if she was being pricked with thousands of razor sharp needles, "I know what I got hit with."
"What?" he asked eagerly. "Tell me so I fix it."
"The Suffundo curse," she told him, sucking in her breath in pain.
Harry's breath caught in his chest. The Suffundo curse was just recently added to the list of Unforgivables. It made the receiver of the curse's red blood cells unable to distribute oxygen so that the poor soul afflicted with the curse effectively suffocated all while being able to breathe perfectly. It was an extremely painful way to die as the victim was completely awake and cognitive as cell death occurred, starting with muscle deterioration and progressing until the major organs shut down.
There was no known counter curse.
"I'm so sorry, Harry," Ginny apologized as she saw the look of horror on his face when he realized what was happening to her.
"Don't be sorry, Ginny. You're going to be fine," he replied in denial.
"No, I'm not," she said softly reaching up to stroke his cheek. "I'm dying."
"No!" he exclaimed with an anguished cry. "You can't die Ginny, I need you! There are still so many things that we have to do. We're supposed to get married and have children and grow old together."
"The only thing I'm sad that I never got to do was wear and show off that beautiful ring that you got me," she joked with a strained smile.
With that Harry dug into his pocket pulling out the ring in question and made to put it back on Ginny's hand.
"Keep it," Ginny told him, drawing her hand away with some difficulty. "Give it to someone else someday. Don't waste it on me."
Harry shook his head sadly as he reached out to recapture her hand so he could slide it on her finger. "This ring belongs to you," he told her, his voice thick with choked back tears. "You're the only person who could ever wear it."
"Harry, leave me," Ginny ordered. "You have an evil wizard to vanquish, stop wasting time."
"I'm not leaving you here to die by yourself–" Harry broke off when he realized what he just said, tears welling up in his eyes. "Oh gods, Ginny, I'm so sorry," he apologized as tears coursed down his face. "I'm sorry I ever got you mixed up in this."
"This isn't your fault." she said soothingly, reaching up with one hand to wipe away his tears, even as her breathing became more labored. "Besides, I told you last night I didn't want to grow old and live forever. Just promise me one thing..."
"Anything," he promised.
"Don't remember me like this...dying," she requested, struggling to speak. "Remember me as I was last night...healthy, happy and deeply...deeply in love with you."
it's hard to get on without a cause,
I don't want to perish like a fading voice,
youth is like diamonds in the sun,
diamonds are forever
As they lay there together under the stars, Harry listened to the shift in Ginny's breathing that signaled that she had fallen asleep. And while he knew he had a big day ahead of him and that he should get some rest as well, he couldn't help but stay up late into the night, watching his love sleep.
She was always beautiful in his eyes, but it was a different kind of beauty when she was sleeping and tonight was no exception. During the day she had a fierce, independent, strong kind of beauty. But the moonlight was bouncing off of the golden highlights of her hair, making it almost seem fluid, and there was an innocence that she possessed while asleep that she didn't have during the day. She looked fragile and delicate, making him want to take her into his arms and never let her go if it would protect her from the world. And so he lay there, cradling her against him, entranced as he watched her peacefully slumber long into the night. Even as the summer night cooled, it warmed him to know that after tomorrow he would be able to watch her sleep every night for the rest of their lives. "I'll love you, Ginny," he whispered into the darkness. "Always and forever." so many adventures couldn't happen today
so many songs we forgot to play
so many dreams swinging out of the blue
left to come true
Harry gathered Ginny into his arms and held her as the life was slowly sucked from her body. He could tell by the look in her eyes that she was in an immense amount of pain, but she didn't show it, choosing to face her end bravely.
"I love you, Ginny," Harry told her, mopping her brow as he tried to make her as comfortable as possible.
"Always...and forever?" Ginny asked as a single stray tear trickled down her left cheek.
"Always and forever," Harry whispered reassuringly, not trusting his voice to speak any louder.
Ginny gave him a sweet, but sad smile and closed her eyes as he leaned forward to give her a kiss. As he placed his lips on hers, he felt Ginny's body relax in his arms and he knew she was gone.
He allowed himself exactly one tear, the same number that Ginny had shed, and placed one last kiss on her lips and one on the crown of her head, before gently setting her on the ground and turning to reface the battle.
He channeled his grief into anger and as he marched up the hill no one dared attack him as the magical energy he was exerting crackled around him. Before he realized what was happening, it was just him and Voldemort at the crest of the hill. He pushed away the reality that in the past hour he had not only just lost his two best friends, the people he considered his family, but also the love of his life. The person that he had wanted to grow old with.
He fed all of his hate for the man, if you could even still call him a man, into his dueling. They exchanged curse for curse, faster and faster, blow for blow, blocking and retaliating at a rate he didn't think possible.
A stream of images coursed through his mind as he fought. The nightmares he had had of the night his parents died. The night at the graveyard where Cedric had been slaughtered. Sirius falling through the veil at the Department of Mysteries. Dumbledore flying off the edge of the Astronomy Tower. Remus dying from his injuries he sustained while defeating Fenrir Greyback. Hagrid rocking back and forth in a ward of St. Mungo's after having received the Kiss from a renegade Dementor. Hermione falling on the battlefield with Ron following only moments after.
However he found the image of Ginny lifeless in his arms, the engagement ring she never got to show off glittering in the sun, emblazoned first and foremost in his mind as he dueled the serpentine man frantically...desperately. As the battle to end all battles wore on and he felt his magical energy draining from him with no sign that Voldemort was slowing down, it became increasingly clear to the young man that he was going to lose.
forever young, I want to be forever young,
do you really want to live forever
forever, forever
As he lay there in the dark he reminisced on their relationship together. Snippets of memories flashed before his eyes.
A lazy afternoon spent by the lake. Ginny was sitting between Harry's legs so he could look over her shoulder so that they could both read from the same book. She looked up from her reading when she felt a pair of familiar lips making their way across the nape of her neck. "We're supposed to be studying," she teased her boyfriend. "I am studying," he replied. "Oh yeah? And what would that be?" she asked playfully. "How beautiful you are," he replied continuing his attentions. "And that you have a birthmark behind your right ear that looks like a heart." "Really now?" she asked her breath becoming shallower. "Mhmm," he murmured just below her jaw line, the vibrations of which drove her crazy. "And, of course, how amazing you taste." Ginny tossed the book aside, suddenly studying didn't seem as important. When he realized it had been a mistake breaking up with her after Dumbledore's death. "I'm idiot and a prat," Harry announced as he barged through the Burrow's kitchen door. Ginny turned away from the sink where she was washing the dishes and looked at him. "If you're waiting for me to disagree with you, you're going to be standing there all night," she said bluntly after a long silence. "I shouldn't have broken up with you," he said simply. "I agree," she replied in the same tone. "Can I take it back?" he asked hopefully. "Only if you finish the dishes," she replied. "Deal." Her last birthday. "And now you can open them," he announced once he had retrieved her present from the other room. Ginny's eyes grew wide when she saw what Harry was holding. "Oh Harry! What's his name?" she asked, referring to the Crup puppy that her boyfriend was holding. "It's a her," he corrected with a grin, "and she is waiting for you to name her." "This is amazing, Harry! Thank you so much, this is the best present I have ever gotten," Ginny exclaimed as she took the wiggling puppy in her arms, thinking hard about what to name her. "I glad you like her," Harry replied, pleased. "I do, I love her and I love you," she responded, giving him a kiss of gratitude. "So, thought of a name yet?" he asked once they broke apart. Ginny held up the puppy in front of her taking her in with great consideration. "You're name is…Mimi." He had been thinking of the time when they were discussing how many kids they each wanted someday and what they wanted to name them when he finally succumbed to sleep. forever young, I want to be forever young
do you really want to live forever
forever, forever
Just as he was resigning himself to his fate and the fact that he was about to fail all of wizard and mankind, a voice that was not his own reverberated in his mind. Don't remember me like this...dying. Remember me as I was last night...healthy, happy and deeply...deeply in love with you.
Then Harry knew what he was doing wrong. He couldn't fight out of the anger and pain that Voldemort had caused him. He needed to fight out of the love he had given to those around him and the love they had given to him.
This realization seemed to warm him from the inside out as he began fighting with a new vigor. Suddenly he was moving at an even more rapid pace, but instead of feeling more drained, he seemed to gain energy as he watched the Dark Lord's eyes grow wide with something akin to fear. Harry continued to advance on the evil wizard, backing him up until Voldemort tripped over a small boulder.
As soon as Voldemort stumbled, Harry took the moment of distraction as an opportunity to fulfill his destiny by using the curse that Hermione and the rest of the Order had been working on during the months since he had found and destroyed the last Horcrux.
Harry sank to his knees as the smoke from where one of the most evil wizards of all time once stood dissipated. He could hardly believe it was finally over. Many of the duels were coming to an end as Voldemort's lackeys noticed that their leader was gone and either surrendered or tried to escape. However there were a few duels that still raged on, and no one, including Harry ever saw the stray red light that was headed straight towards his back.
The only emotions that registered in Harry's mind as he slumped forward were surprise and curiosity as to why he felt so cold when it was such a nice warm summer morning…
forever young, I want to be forever young
do you really want to live forever,
forever, forever
Harry came back to consciousness slowly, only barely aware of the warm sun beating down on his face and the soft grass beneath his body. But even in his semi aware state he knew something was amiss. The last thing he remembered was being cold, the kind of cold that chilled you down to the bones. And then he was floating through nothingness until he became apart of the nothingness. He has simply assumed he was dead. But now he comfortably warm and definitely on solid ground.
But even as he become more conscious and aware, he continued to lie still with his eyes shut, wishing he hadn't lived. After all he was now alone in the world, his oldest friends as well as his best friend and lover, were all gone. He wasn't sure if he ever wanted to open his eyes again and face this harsh new reality.
But that was before his eyes flew open at the sound of a bark-like laugh. There was only one person he knew with a laugh like that. "Sirius?" he asked confused as he saw his godfather standing above him.
"Of course it's me," the older man exclaimed, extending a hand to help Harry up. "Who were you expecting, the Queen of England?"
"What happened? Where am I? How did I get here?" Harry asked in rapid succession.
"You know the answers to those questions, if you really ask yourself," Sirius replied philosophically. "But there will be time for that later, right now, I think there are some other people that would like to say hello."
Harry turned around to look where Sirius was pointing and was immediately greeted by a man with his messy hair and a woman with his eyes.
"Mum? Dad?" Harry questioned quietly.
"Oh, Harry," Lily exclaimed reaching out to engulf her son in a hug, "we're so proud of you!"
"That's the way the Potters do it," James declared, clapping his boy on the shoulder.
"I want to say hello too," Remus interjected once they had their family moment.
"Congratulations Harry," Dumbledore commended. "But now there are a few people who have more recently joined our association that would like to have a reunion."
"That was bloody brilliant mate," Ron said, stepping forward through the throng of Harry's deceased family and friends to give his best friend a clap on the back.
"I knew you could do it Harry!" Hermione exclaimed, launching herself through the crowd and into his arms for a hug. "I knew that curse would work."
"Of course it did," Harry replied, hugging her back. "You're the one that invented it."
But once he released her, he realized that there was one face in the crowed that was missing. The one face that he really wanted to see above all others.
"Hey, Hermione?" Harry started to ask. "Where's Gi-"
But he didn't have a chance to finish his question before Hermione gave him a knowing smile and stepped aside as the group parted, revealing just the person he most wanted to see.
She was wearing a white sundress that billowed around her knees and her long red hair was swirling around her face even though there didn't seem to be any wind, and her engagement ring was sparkling on her finger in the sun. Harry stood as if carved in stone, mesmerized by the absolute vision she presented.
He couldn't have told you how it happened, because he didn't know himself, but the next thing he knew she was in his arms, where they reaffirmed each other's presence.
"You did it," Ginny whispered as Harry brushed the joyful tears off her cheeks with his thumbs.
"I did it for you," he replied. "I did it because of you."
"No, you did it for the world," she said, sinking back into his embrace and burying her face in his shoulder. "You always were a reluctant hero."
Harry didn't reply but instead just continued to hold her. Something he had feared he would never be able to do again.
"So I guess that you get your wish after all," Harry muttered quietly into her ear after a long moment.
"What wish?" she asked, looking up into his eyes.
"We're going to get to stay like this, to be together and young forever."
"I guess we will."
"I love you, Ginny."
"I love you too, Harry."
"Always and forever?"
"Always and forever."
forever young, I want to be forever young
do you really want to live forever,
forever, forever...
A/N Like I said I have no idea what got into me...I've never had the desire to kill everyone off like this before...Actually in the original version I wrote, Harry didn't die and he had to live without Ginny, but I felt that was too tragic and I liked the bittersweet ending better...The song is Forever Young and I was using the Youth Group version of it and by use I mean listening to it on repeat the whole time I was writing this...This is my first songfic I started (even though its not the first one I posted) so please let me know what you thought, opinions much appreciated...