WHEN HP FANS GET BORED PART 222222.
HARRY POTTER DOESN'T BELONG TO US AND ALL THAT JAZZ... BLAHBLAHBLAH.
--
-Five Hours later-
-Harry, Ron, and Hermione are now about a mile away from Hogwarts-
Harry: I TOLD YOU TO GO TO THE BATHROOM BEFORE WE LEFT, RON.
Ron: -sniffle- Sorry, Harry... I... take a long time to go... ..
Hermione: No kidding. -stares at watch- 5 hours. Jeez.
Buckbeak: ASDFGHJKLASDFGGJHLDSFJASFKDJ. (I'M HUNGRY, BIATCHES.)
Hermione: I'M FLUENT IN BUCKBEAKIAN! He just said... He's into Hungarian beaches.
Ron: WOW! SO AM I!
Harry: -pats Buckbeak- We'll take you to a Hungarian beach as soon as we change our identities and win the lottery, okay?
Buckbeak: ASDFGHJKL... (Well this sucks...)
Hermione: Of course we'll buy you some hockey pucks, Buckbeak:)
Buckbeak: ...
Harry: -yawns- Even though it's 2:00 in the afternoon, I'm REALLYYYYYYYYY tired... LET'S LAND.
Hermione: But we've only just started! D:
Harry: I HAVE TO FIGHT VOLDEMORT, I HAVE TO PUT UP WITH SNAPE, I HAVE TO BE TORMENTED BY MALFOY... MEMEME!! I WANT TO LAND!
Ron: -cries- You're scaring me, Harry... ;-;
Hermione: Jeez, calm down, we'll land. e-e
-the three land-
--
-On the outskirts of Hogwarts-
Ron: -trying to make a fire with a blade of grass and a leaf- I WATCHED THIS ON A MUGGLE SHOW ONCE... STAND BACK!
Harry: -glares at Ron- YOU STUPID PRICK. YOU HAVE TO USE A ROCK AND BLADE OF GRASS.
Hermione: -sighs, lifting her wand over Ron's pile of sticks and lighting a fire-
Ron: OMG I DID IT!
Harry: NO FAIRRRRRRR. D:
ALL OF A SUDDEN!!
-A random dementor floats up to the group-
Dementor: 'sup.
Harry: OMFGGGGGGGGGEXPECTOPATRONUMMMMMMMMMMMMM.
Dementor: D: -melts-
Ron: WHAT LUCK! WE'LL FEAST LIKE KINGS TONIGHT! -tosses Dementor corpse into fire-
Harry: -faints-
Hermione: Well... this was interesting.
--
-Later-
Harry: -groans, sitting up- Ughhhhhhhhhhh... I feel like Buckbeak sat on my face...
Hermione: Uh... He did actually...
Buckbeak: -shifty eyes-
Ron: EAT THE CHOCOLATE, HARRY. -smushes it in his mouth- I made it myself!
Harry: -pauses, taking in the taste. His face suddenly goes green as he runs behind a bush to throw up- THIS ISN'T CHOCOLATE, RON!!111
Ron: orly? SORRY HARRY. IT LOOKED LIKE IT, THOUGH... D:
-unpleasant barfing sounds are heard from behind the bush that Harry jumped into-
Harry: WHY DO I TASTE CORN?
Ron: ...
Hermione: -gags- This is getting seriously messed up... -munches on Dementor hand- Mmm, nice cooking by the way, Ron.
Buckbeak: -chewing on Dementor head- ASDFGHJKLASDF. (Not bad, not bad... needs more salt.)
Hermione: Yeah, I guess this is Harry's fault, Buckbeak... We wouldn't be stuck out here eating Dementor corpses if SOMEONE would've just controlled their temper...
Harry: YEAH, RON.
Ron: ... Wha-What? -cries-
--
-Back at Hogwarts-
Dumbledore: -wakes up- I had the strangest dream that Harry and his friends jumped me... AH WELL. -walks over to the doorway of the Great Hall, but is suddenly knocked over as Snape comes bursting in-
Snape: Headmaster... wha-- where are you?
Dumbledore: -drags himself over to Snape's feet- Good day Severus! It seems that I've lost the feeling in my legs... Anyway, what can I do for you?
Snape: I want a raise... I mean, I've discovered that our dear Professor Whatsherface has disappeared... you know, the one as old as you. Maybe older...
Dumbledore: Don't talk about Professor Flitwick like that! D:
Snape: NO! NOT THE TROLL TEACHER! Ugh... what's her name... McDonald?
Dumbledore: Debbie?
Snape: No... McLuckycharms?
Dumbledore: Oooh! Toucan Sam!
Snape: NO! It's... McGonagall, that's it. She's disappeared and her students seem to of used their educational time by throwing a party...
Dumbledore: Sweet, are we invited?
Snape: ...
Dumbledore: Er... I MEAN... Harry Potter and his two friends mentioned something about her disappearance. They said I shouldn't be suspicious about it. :)
Snape: Well where are Potter and his two lackeys?
Dumbledore: Well... They're either sleeping... or going to the bathroom... something about fiber. :)
Snape: ... I am -so- killing you someday... -walks away-
Dumbldore: Aww, you're such a kidder Severus! Goodbye! -starts to drag himself to the party at McGonagall's classroom-
--
-Back at Harry, Ron, and Hermione's Campsite-
Ron: And the cow NEVER saw the vampire scarecrow again... o-o
Hermione: ... interesting... I think it would've made a whole lot more sense if the cow didn't have butterfly wings... and lived at the circus...
Ron: YOU'RE JUST JEALOUS OF MY PWNSOME STORY TELLING SKILLZ. -snapsnap-
Hermione: Yeah. Sure.
Harry: YOU TWO BORE ME. I'm going to go into the deep dark Forbidden Forest for kicks. Anyone want to join me:)
Hermione: o-o
Ron: o-o
Harry: FANTASTIC. LET'S GO.
--
WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO HARRY, RON, HERMIONE, SNAPE, AND DISABLED DUMBLEDORE? WHY AM I ASKING YOU?! FIND OUT IN CHAPTER 333333333. :0