This is the sequel to The Best I Can Do, covering H&L relationship during RotJ. Like the other one, it was beta-read by VaderLVR64, and of course, I own nothing. Enjoy and review! G.

Chapter 1

Dear Han.

It sounds weird, but it is the proper heading now, isn't it?

Dear Han.

My scoundrel.

My dearest nerfherder.

You'll probably never read this words, although I hope (no, I know!) the reason would be because I will have the opportunity of saying them to you, personally and intimately, a thousand times.

I miss you.

I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you. I miss you.

I miss you so much that at times it seems that I can't breathe, and my heart and my head are pounding so hard I feel they're going to explode. It's been only a week and a half since that Monster froze you in the carbonite but it feels like eternity. Where in the galaxy are you? Chewie and Lando have been in Tatooine already for four days, but there's no sign of you or Fett yet.

Poor Chewie. He felt so miserable in the voyage back. I did my best to support him, but I wasn't in a better shape than he was. But we had Luke to care for and that kept us in line. BTW, Lando's ego has been flattened to the height of a monomolecular film and he's stoically endured all of Chewie's cursing so far. Some from me too, although part of me understands his reasons. But I cannot forgive his naiveté in his dealing with Vader.

I wonder if you are conscious in your cold slab. I've researched the holo-net, but found nothing about humans frozen in carbonite. I've had this disturbing dream, though, about the suffocating cold.

I'll say goodbye for the night now, but I'm sure I'll dream of you, like I do every night. I just needed someone to talk, and - surprise! – guess whom I have been talking to the last few months? I must have grown used to it. Luke is in no shape to hear my ramblings and besides, I don't know how to address this issue with him. This issue being you and I.

I'm very worried about Luke, something happened to him in the months we were separated. He didn't go to the rendezvous point. He says he's been training, but he doesn't want to tell where. Plus, he had a close call with Vader in Bespin and he lost his right hand. You wouldn't recognize him, Han. There's so little left of the boy we met a few years ago. Only the pain in his eyes remains.

See you in my dreams, flyboy.

Yours,

Leia.

Still very worried about Luke, Han. I tried to make him talk, without much success. Did he tell you that he saw Obi-Wan Kenobi in Hoth, right before you found him? I don't know what to believe. But it's true that I heard him, somehow, and knew exactly where he was, back in Bespin. That's how we found him. Maybe that's how you found him too, that night. But this was strange, because I heard him in the same way I heard Vader before, you know? In fact, at first I thought it was Vader intruding in my mind again.

NO, I won't speak of Vader. I hate him.

Not-so-dear-anymore Han.

If I had you in range, I think I'd shoot you without regret right now, Han. Just to stun, so I could do it again immediately after you regain consciousness.

Have you any idea how many women have knocked on my door so far, volunteering for the rescue party? There have been offerings from guys too, all right, Rogue Squadron did it in a big way, but they didn't knock on my door at ungodly hours. They sent a proper formal note via comm. But the women, they seem to prefer to come with their cover stories (didn't know you had so many "special friends", when did you actually sleep, for (inconvenient) sake?) late at the night cycle, when there are less people in the halls. And there also seems to be an unusual amount of tall blondes among this group.

But I can understand them. If you were a tenth as beautiful to them that you were to me, I can understand them. Don't expect me to be so understanding with you, though.

Oh, no. Somebody's knocking again. You're going to pay for this, Captain Han Too-Many-Hands Solo.

Oh, Goddess, it's three in the morning and I can't sleep. You managed to slip into my dreams again, flyboy. I heard you saying that you loved me and then I woke up crying. I'm a mess again. I miss your voice, Han, your touch, your... everything.

What have I gotten me into?

I think I'm pregnant.

I'm two days late and I'm never late. Why wouldn't you have more shots on board??? Isn't your motto "Always Ready"? Don't you know that women's shots are less reliable???? One full point of a percentage less reliable!!!

I've been dreaming of this baby with your eyes, you nerfherder. I've become afraid of my dreams, because they have a strange tendency to become real. I couldn't find out if it was a boy or a girl, though.

But I can't go to the med-center and ask for a test, can I? I'll have to wait, I guess.

I'm not pregnant. I should be relieved but I feel like crying.

Again.

A few weeks ago, when I was so afraid that you would leave me, I never imagined that it would be this way. Not because of Vader's doing. And yet, you're not totally gone, because I have this feeling we will meet again. I've dreamt of it.

I look at the stars so dear to us both and know you are there, somewhere.

Father told me more than once about the things Jedi could do, but I guess you sometimes have to see to believe.

Luke let me watch him training today and what he can do is simply amazing. I couldn't stop watching him, he's simply fascinating. He hinted to me that he found one of the Masters that are still hiding.

There is still some connection between us. Sometimes I think I still can sense what he's feeling, what he's thinking. But it's a fledgling sensation and I don't know what to think about it. Luke insinuated that I might be Force-sensitive too. I think he feels lonely.

I had a big argument with Mon today. She doesn't want me to "waste" more time searching for you. I told her that the Alliance doesn't abandon one of our people, that that was what differences us from the Empire, and that for all practical purposes except in the papers, you were ours. But what I wanted really to shout is that you are mine as much as I'm yours, and abandon you would be as much as committing suicide. Because how could I possibly live without your rakish smile in my life?

I should have thrown the truth in Mon's face but I didn't. I'm a coward, I know. I never put much thought on what would I do after Bespin. I didn't want to. But I know that my feelings for you won't do any good to Mon's disposition to aid us right now.

I'm sorry, Han. I feel like I'm betraying you.

This is not living.

It was my Naming Day today, Han! I'm officially twenty-four standard years old. The people here where I'm staying threw me a party. They were very sweet and yet I felt so alone! I missed your customary Naming Day prank, flyboy. Everybody was sooooo respectful. I wish I hadn't burnt those (inconvenient) undergarments you gave me last year.

When Carlist put a cup of Freyin's in my hand, I almost choked with the mandatory toast. Remember the bottle we drank the night before Bespin? I remember it very well.

I remember that I (inconvenient) and then you (inconvenient).

(inconvenient), I don't remember how to deactivate the Family-Friendly filter of this (inconvenient) datapad.

Now that I think, that is a good title for a cheap novel, "The (inconvenient) Night Before Bespin."

I missed Father and my family too, but I'm already used to that. Isn't it terrible that you get so used to not having someone in your life that you stop missing her or him? I know you know what I'm talking about. But that won't be happening to us, Han.

(inconvenient), I think I'm drunk. Miss you, big boy. I really do.

Tatooine is as awful as you told me, Han. We've been inquiring about you and Fett for weeks and nobody seems to know anything about your whereabouts. I hate it here. I feel... uncomfortable, like if someone was poking at me all the time.

We went to old Kenobi's hut today because Luke needed a few things to put together a new lightsaber. He lost his old on1e in Bespin, along with his hand. The prosthetic is working very well, thank the Goddess, and he has his old skills back and a few new ones too.

It's strange how changed he is. He almost never smiles now.

Can you believe it? I've been to Coruscant and back again. Tricky business.

Ask me about (inconvenient) Xizor some day, preferentially if I'm very drunk. Maybe you should be drunk too.

I'm so very grateful for Chewie.

Tomorrow is the big day, Han. We'll try getting you out tomorrow.

No.

As Luke says, we won't try, we'll do it.

Luke's plan is crazy and he's putting a lot of faith in his newly acquired abilities, but somehow, as always, I trust him.

Even though, I can't stop thinking of that dream I had back in our way to Bespin. That dream where you lay somewhere underground, so quiet, so... no, I won't write it. Jabba's palace lays underground. But I had other dreams since then.

I should be sleeping now to be in top form in the morning but I simply can't.

Oh, yeah, and they don't have (inconvenient) undergarments in this forsaken planet. Maybe that's why it's so scantily populated.

I've reread all of these ramblings and noticed that I didn't write down once that I love you. Maybe I still have a problem with those words. But I do love you, desperately, terribly, thoroughly, completely. I just hope you were telling me the truth when you said that you knew, because I know you're capable of lying convincingly. That I still love you will be the first thing I'll say to you tomorrow, Han.