Stuck
Synopsis: AU: The title speaks for itself. Everyone finds out that the universe does not implode if the Doctor bets with one Captain Jack Harkness.
Um, I'm not exactly sure when this story takes place, because…well, its 10 Doctor and Rose, plus Jack is still with them… Let's just go with, 'the Doctor regenerated, Jack ran onboard the TARDIS before they took off, and he's been invisible ever since.'
Hey, it works for me.
Pure fluffiness! Humorous if you like this kind of thing; I thought it was funny, cute.
Disclaimer: What?! You mean I don't own anything? I don't even own those rolls of Duct Tape?? Awww….Okay, so I know that they're all Red Green's…but you don't have to rub it in.
Special Thanks: -Nela and Ally, I think. Or is it Aly? From Taggeh. They totally gave me the idea for the mayo and the veggies.
Dedication: This is totally going out to…Nela and Aly!! And…I-Confuse-Everyone (Who is awesome and who read it and told me to put it on fan fiction)
Enough of this Author's notes. Bananas go out to everyone who has reviewed any of my stuff and even those who didn't review my stuff but read it. XD –sends Bananas through the time vortex- -watches as one splatters on a wall just outside of England- hmm…got to fix that. Sorry if it's delayed. Otherwise, enjoy your banana. xD
"Oi, Rose Tyler!" His call was heard resonating down the hallways of the TARDIS, and Rose stepped lightly out of the kitchen to answer it.
"'Oi' what?" she shouted back at the Doctor good naturedly, not knowing where to aim her voice.
" 'Oi-come-an'-help-me-'fore-I-die,' that's what!" It sounded like he was in the console room, and desperate at that. Rose sighed, for she didn't have time or patience to do two things at once. She looked over her shoulder longingly at the tea and chocolate she had set out for her own consumption, and considered the odds that Jack would sneak in and snitch her last piece of chocolate as soon as her back was turned. Unfortunately, they were pretty good. She stuck her head out the door again.
"Get 'Captain' Jack to help you!" Rose replied, thoroughly irritated. The Doctor did not own her, and what could he possibly die of in the TARDIS? Suddenly she heard a distinct noise that sounded suspiciously like a snort.
"Jack's the one that's doing it to—" The Doctor's voice was suddenly muffled and Rose heard Jack's laughter echoing down the maze of halls.
"I'm going to get both of them," Rose muttered to herself, storming down the hall. She entered the console room and was immediately hit with a truly comical sight. The Doctor was in the captain's chair, tied firmly to it with so much Duct Tape he looked like a Mummy. Rose found the source of his muffled plea; Stuffed in his mouth was a banana wrapped securely in Duct Tape. Behind this Duct Taped banana, a truly miserably embarrassed Doctor was mumbling his head off. Cauliflower was jammed inside his hardly visible ears, and broccoli hung from his nostrils. His melting brown eyes were black, and the skin around them was carefully smeared with a mixture of mayonnaise and mustard, a smelly combination. On his head was an upside down, decorated flowerpot.
Beside him, Jack sat, grinning smugly from ear to ear.
Rose looked over at the Doctor again for a moment in time, careful not to look directly at his nose. This was absolutely priceless. She waited another second before she completely lost it. She fell to the ground, laughing so hard tears welled in her eyes and her face turned bright red.
"Check out his toes," Jack told her proudly, just as the Doctor roughly tugged them away, but they could not elude his curious companion for long, and she caught a glimpse of them as she stood up. They were bright purple.
Rose let loose a roar of laughter and fell to the ground again. "Oh, my ribs…ache!" she said, gasping for breath as she rose to her feet once more. She looked at Jack and his silly grin and risked asking, "Can I take that banana from his mouth now?"
Jack grinned pleasantly back at her and nodded. "Cover your ears first," he warned her cheerfully, and conveniently pulled out one set of earplugs. Rose grinned.
"Where did you get those?"
"The TARDIS. I told her what I was going to do and she sent me these, just in case," Jack told her.
Rose chuckled. "I would kill to have a camera right now," she murmured, approaching the Doctor cautiously. The Doctor eyed her warily from where he sat in the captain's chair.
"No need," Jack replied cheerfully, pulling out a digital camera and waving it at her.
Rose gave a small shriek of delight. "Take some pictures, Jack!" She was close enough to see the Doctor's warm brown eyes roll. And she was close enough to elbow him sharply between his ribcage.
"Ommuh," the Doctor said, doubling over, or at least trying to. Rose stumbled over to the swivel chair still laughing, and was about to remove the ill-treated banana from his mouth when the swivel chair did just that; it swivelled. She could have sworn it was done on purpose. She tipped and fell neatly into the Doctor's lap.
Rose sat up fully and tried to get up, but was restrained. She glanced down to see what was holding her back, and to her surprise and pleasure, it was the Doctor. His brown, heart-warming eyes twinkled mischievously down at her, and she smiled back, finally succeeding in removing the banana from his lips.
"Um, Doctor—"
"Yes, Rose?"
"Could you kindly remove that broccoli from your nose? Disgusting, that."
The Doctor laughed. "How am I supposed to do that?"
Rose held out a Kleenex gingerly, faced with no other choice. "Here. I hold, you blow."
The Doctor looked at her doubtfully. "Are you sure you could handle it?"
"Shut up and just do it already," she scowled at him. He did. Rose couldn't help but note that Jack was laughing at her wrinkled nose as she closed her eyes and held the tissue for the Doctor. She heard a camera flash. As soon as the dirty deed was done, in one smooth, frantic motion, she wrapped it in a ball and threw it across the console room. A rubbish bin materialized a second before it hit the ground. Apparently the TARDIS didn't appreciate it either.
Rose heard another camera flash and turned to glare over at Jack, fully annoyed.
"Let's kill him," the Doctor whispered in her ear, and Rose nodded in concurrence. She sat up straight, resting a warm hand on his duct-tape-covered shoulder, and shifted more comfortably onto his lap, henceforth making him squirm slightly at the initiated contact.
"First tell me why."
"Ask Jack," the Doctor protested.
Rose turned to the ex-time agent expectantly.
Jack grinned and gloated, "You have to tell her; it was part of the bet!"
"What bet?" Rose asked, her patience wearing thin.
"Ask the Doctor," Jack suggested wickedly.
Rose turned back to the Doctor.
"Well…" Rose would not have placed the Doctor for easily embarrassed, but it was clear that she had him pegged wrong. She watched in amusement as he squirmed, sighed and shifted uncomfortably, going very red and not looking her in the eye.
"Well?" she prompted, thoroughly enjoying this.
"Jack placed a bet."
"Oh. Might I ask what this bet entails?"
"He said…hesaidthatifhecouldprovewithonewordthatIloveyou, hegottotiemeuplikethis."
Rose blinked. "Sorry, I didn't catch that."
The Doctor sighed and spoke slower. "He said that if he could prove with one word that I love you, he got to tie me up like this, then get me to admit it if you asked."
Rose's eyes widened, right before her mouth flew wide in a sweet grin, showing her teeth. He loved her. "You lost."
The Doctor looked back at Rose, his smile loving, bright and gentle. He lowered his head. "I didn't mind."
- - - - -- - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Jack watched and grinned. Taking risks was so worth it. He stood and silently slipped from the room, unnoticed by the two snuggled in the captain's chair. He smiled again, pleased with himself. They both loved each other; they had just needed a little nudge off the fence.
Jack suddenly gave a wicked grin. Had Rose left something in the kitchen for him? Some things never change…
"CAPTAIN JACK HARKNESS!!!!"
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
The End