First Date
Chapter 2: An Uncle's Advice
"What's this I hear about you having a date tonight?" Hiashi stopped Neji with his voice.
"I have a date with Tenten, Hiashi-sama," Neji explained.
"Sit down my nephew, for we must have a talk before you leave," Hiashi said from behind a newspaper.
Neji looked at the clock and sat down from across the leader of his clan.
"What is it?" The prodigy asked.
"Neji, do you know the number one instinct for any mammal?" Hiashi asked calmly while folding up his newspaper.
Neji immediately blushed.
"You are correct boy, the sex drive is the number one instinct. Now you are a man, correct?"
Neji blushed some more and nodded his head.
"And as man, you must go in for the kill at the first chance, like a cheetah stalking the antelope," Hiashi stated in a dramatic manor.
"Wh-what? I'm only 16!" A beet red Neji exclaimed.
"And far too old already! You could've had one or two kids by now! Oh, I knew I should have given you this talk earlier," Hiashi sniffled emotionally like a pregnant woman.
"I don't think I'm-" Neji started, but got cut off.
"Silence boy! Now I must show you the secret Hyuuga techniques with these puppets!" Hiashi cheered as he held up his hands to reveal a girl and a boy puppet.
"Oh my god." Neji didn't know who he wanted to smack more, himself or his uncle.
"Now this one is good for when you two are in a small area," Hiashi started explained and moved the puppets into an awkward position.
"Hiashi-sama, please stop," Neji calmly begged.
"What? Would you rather me demonstrate with a pillow or the blow up doll?" The Hyuuga clan leader asked innocently.
"NO! I mean, I think I can figure these things out on my own," Neji cleared his throat.
Hiashi dropped the puppets and walked up to his nephew.
"Your father would be so proud of you."
Sunset.
"Hiashi-sama…"
Waves.
"Neji."
The boulder.
"HIASHI-SA…ma…oh god no," Neji stopped before the sparkles could come in.
"Get 'er done Neji my boy," Hiashi said with a thumbs up and glittering eyes.
"Uhhh, goodbye."
Neji left as quickly as possible before things could get even weirder.
A/N: This one wasn't really planned.