Meant to be… or so I Hope

I know we are meant to be… I can feel it in my stomach… but… is it true?

I knew Sandy for years, and we treat each other like family, and that's just how I like my friends. But… I have never thought of going to the next level with friendship. I have never even felt this way about anybody. It's just all too difficult to explain. I get a queasy feeling around Sandy making it feel like my heart is going to pop out of my mouth. I stutter while talking, I shake when standing still; I cough whenever there is an awkward silence between us and I'm always afraid that she thinks there is something wrong with me, suspecting something about me.

Well there is something wrong with me! And I'm trying my best to not show these symptoms around her. And I don't think I'm doing a very good job at hiding it. Aw barnacles… is this what it feels like to be in love?

Well I hate it… and I love it…

This feeling feels so wrong… but yet so right… I don't know what I'm saying, I must be confusing you, and I'm confusing myself right now.

I've been looking at Sandy in a different way now. I see her more… beautifully. Don't get me wrong; I've always thought she was beautiful. But I now see her attractive, I now want to hold her tight and never let her go. I even had a dream one night that I was up in her room with her, all alone in the dark with a few candles lit and we were on her bed, and I was touching her in places I have never imagined touching anyone in my life! I was up all night thinking about it, but trying my best to not think about it, but I never considered it as a nightmare. I've considered it more as a thought.

Every connection I have with her, physically, mentally and emotionally, has caused me to sweat and breathe heavily. Whenever her tail brushes against my skin when she turns around I twitch and hold onto my chest trying to get my heart to stop thumping at a fast pace.

Whenever I think about her eyes, her nose, personality, smile, laugh, voice, and body at any moment at any time in my day, I would just smile and stare into space. That have happened one time when I was Jelly fishing with Patrick, I was chasing a jellyfish when all of a sudden my whole body stopped and my mind was wondering all over the place about Sandy. Patrick snooped up on me and asked if I was okay. I swung my arm around almost smacking a jellyfish causing the jellyfish to be aggravated and zapping me on the arm.

I would think about her when I work at the Krusty Krab, standing in front of the grill with my spatula in my hand staring into space. My mind suddenly stopped with the sound of the smoke alarm going off, Squidward yelling at me to focus, and sprinkles of water escaping from the sprinkler on the ceiling causing the customers to scream and escape. Mr. Krabs ordered me into his office. He was going on and on how I can't go wondering off in my mind on other things than work and keeping the customers happy. He said, "This has been going on for too long Spongebob! Just take a vacation until your mind is cleared of whatever the Davey Jones you're thinking about!" I haven't worked in a week and my mind is still on Sandy!

I tried to tell her my feelings, I have, A LOT, but I alway's end up stuttering and start talking about something else. I don't know what to do, I want to tell somebody else about it, like Patrick, he has been my friend longer than anyone else and is very loyal to me. But I have to admit, that guy is dumber than rocks and let's face it he lives in one. And I don' think he would like the fact that his best friend likes a squirrel, and won't have time for him. I would like to tell somebody, anybody! Ask them for advice! Any advice would do, if it sounds good. But I'm afraid that no one will respect me. I'm afraid that no one will be mature with the fact that a sea creature loves a land creature. Not too mention the species are a sponge in love with a squirrel.

But I'm going to have to tell her someday. I just have too. I can't live with this feeling forever. I want Patrick to know I still want to hang out with him. I want to work at my favorite place in the whole world again. I do not want any more dreams of me touching Sandy in such a way! Or at least, not as many as I usually have. I have to do it! I will do it, in good time. Because I know, and only I know, that we are meant to be…

… or at least… I hope so…

I might continue with this story. Please R&R!!!