The Truth of All Truths

"Damn Sasuke bastard," Naruto growled. "Hurry up, dobe," said boy yelled back. "Don't call me dobe!" The ravenette smirked. "If you say so. Dobe." Naruto growled again. If Kakashi-sensei hadn't told them to meet him at the training grounds immediately, he would've jumped Sasuke. Wait! No! Not jumped! Naruto shook his head and groaned. Not again he thought. Lately, he just couldn't stop thinking about his male teammate. He was beginning to think his pervy teacher and Ero-sennin were rubbing off on him. And on more than one occasion, he would wake up moaning Sasuke's name after a realistic wet dream with him pounding into Sasuke's tight hole, feeling him squirm under him, crying out for more.

Finally at the training grounds, Naruto started beating his head on a nearby tree. "Naruto, what the hell are you doing?" Sakura asked. "Trying to think straight," he replied. Actually, trying not to think gay he thought. Sasuke smirked slightly, as if he could read Naruto's mind. "Where is Kakashi-sensei?" Naruto asked when he stopped beating his head with the tree. "I don't know," Sakura replied, "But he better hurry up. If he isn't here soon, I'm leaving. I have a date with Lee." Sasuke's smirk never left. "So you finally decided to let him take you out?" Sakura nodded. "After I realized…well, something, I knew you would never like me the way I liked you, Sasuke, so I decided to give Lee a chance."

"What did you realize, Sakura?" Naruto asked. Sakura looked at Sasuke momentarily, who shook his head a little. "Oh, it's nothing really important," Sakura said with a smile. Naruto, dumb as he may be, noticed there was a silent conversation going on between the other two. "Really! What's going on?" Naruto pouted. "Nothing," Sakura insisted. Fortunately for Sakura, Kakashi chose that moment to appear. "Yo," he said simply. "Wadda you mean, yo?" Sakura yelled. "You're late again!" "Sorry," Kakashi said, his eye smiling. "I got lost on the way here." "LIAR!" Naruto hollered. "You were probably reading your nasty Icha Icha Paradise book!" Kakashi was about to say something before Sasuke cut him off.

"You said it was an emergency?" "Well," Kakashi stated, "You all have the rest of the week off." "Why?" Sakura asked suspiciously. Even with the mask, it was obvious that Kakashi was blushing. "Well, honestly, I'm kind of going on a vacation." "Hmm…a vacation, huh?" Sasuke said slyly. "Do you plan on taking someone with you as company?" Kakashi turned more red and glared at Sasuke a moment. "Actually, yes. I am."

"Well, that's all I needed to know." Sasuke said, putting his hands in his pocket, and walking away. As he passed Kakashi, he muttered, "Naruto will kill you if you hurt Iruka in any way." Kakashi just smiled behind the mask. "Same goes for you." Sasuke uncharastically blushed, but kept walking. Naruto noticed this and ran after him. Sakura gazed longingly toward the disappearing back of Sasuke before she headed home to get ready for her date with Lee. Kakashi smiled as a plan formulated in his perverted mind before heading toward the Uchiha mansion.

"Hey, teme!" Naruto shouted. "What?" "What did Kakashi-sensei say to make you blush like that?" Sasuke blushed more, but just continued walking. "None of your business, dobe." Naruto started fuming. "I said not to call me dobe! And I think it is my business." "Well, you're wrong, 'cause it's not." He left Naruto just standing there, confused and angry.

When Sasuke got home, he noticed someone had been there. He quietly slid out a kunai and snuck into his house. He checked every room, expecting to see Itachi, but the whole house was empty. The last place he checked was his room. There was nothing out of the ordinary, except for a medium sized box on his bed. He cautiously walked up to it and looked at the tag. 'You might need these' was all it said. Sasuke slowly opened the lid and his eyes widened.

Sasuke immediately got a nosebleed and passed out from the blood loss. In the box were an assortment of sex toys, instructions, videos, a book entitled It's Okay to Be Gay and What to Do About It, and a bunch of other things even I don't want to mention.

Back with Naruto, he was still standing in the same spot. After a moment, he shook his head and left for home. He hadn't taken five steps when he saw his former teacher. "Hey! Iruka-sensei!" he shouted glomping the older man, making him wince slightly. "Hey, Naruto. What's up?" Naruto looked down. "Well…" Iruka patted him on the head slightly. "Do you want to come over and talk about it?" he asked with some parental concern, switching to Mother Hen mode. The blonde nodded and followed Iruka to his house.

Once inside, Iruka went to the kitchen to make some ramen and milk. Naruto sat down in the living room, and looked around at the familiar settings. He noticed that there were some suitcases in the hallway. "Hey, Iruka-sensei, are you going on a trip?" Naruto yelled into the kitchen. "Why, yes. I've decided to go on a vacation for the rest of this week and I've hired a substitute at the academy," Iruka said, grabbing the milk and ramen and heading for the living room.

"Did you know that Kakashi-sensei is also going on vacation this week?" Naruto asked, as Iruka walked into the room. "Why, yes. He is going to be my companion. Since we're both visiting the same place, we've decided to keep each other company." He said, blushing a little. "Really," Naruto said suspiciously. "So, does this mean you and Kakashi-sensei are together?" Iruka turned red at this statement. "Ah, well, we...uh...wait. Naruto, didn't you come over to talk about what's bothering you?"

Naruto pouted cutely, but knew he wasn't going to get anything more out of his former teacher. "Well," the kitsune vessel started. "Is it wrong to like someone of the same gender?" Iruka, who was taking a drink of milk at the time, promptly spewed it all over the floor. Naruto looked bewildered at this outburst. "Well, Naruto," Iruka said, wiping his mouth, "all that really matters is if you really love them. If you do, then there is no problem and you should be together. Why? Who are you talking about? I thought you liked Sakura-chan?" Naruto blushed a little. "I used to, but now I like…" He blushed and couldn't finish his sentence. Iruka smiled. "It's Sasuke, isn't it?"

Naruto turned impossibly red and avoided Iruka's eyes. "Yeah," he said quietly. "Well, that's great!" Iruka said. "Huh?" Iruka laughed at Naruto's disbelieving expression. "Some of the other ninja of the village have noticed that your rivalry is more than just that. They actually made bets about when you two would hook up. I guess you were the last to know that you like Sasuke." "Well, I just started to notice things about him that I didn't before, like how smooth his skin is, and when his hair brushes my hand when we're sparring, how soft and silky it is," Naruto blushed more and avoided looking into Iruka's eyes directly.

"Well, Naruto, I think you should tell him how you feel. I'm sure he feels the same way," Iruka explained. Naruto stared at the floor with a far off look in his eyes. "But what if he rejects me? What if he hates me like the rest of the village?" Iruka stook and walked over to Naruto, sitting next to him on the couch. When Naruto looked up, Iruka noticed he was crying. The older man wrapped his arms around his former student. "Don't worry, Naruto. If you love Sasuke as much as you say you do, then I'm positive he feels the same way about you. If you love him, you need to tell him because if you don't, then he'll never know how you really feel. What if he doesn't love you back? You two will still be friends."

Naruto smiled up at Iruka, drying his tears. "Thanks, Iruka-sensei. I think I'm going to go and tell him now." Iruka smiled kindly at the blonde. Naruto grabbed the ramen and quickly ate the entire cup. As he made his way to the door, he paused. "Iruka-sensei?" "Yes, Naruto?" "So, you really like Kakashi-sensei?" Iruka blushed and looked down. Naruto smiled. At least now, Iruka wouldn't be lonely. He was happy for him, even if he was with a pervert like Kakashi. He left without getting an answer and headed to the Uchiha mansion.

Iruka looked up as Kakashi poofed into the house. "'Kashi, where were you?" He asked, standing up. The silver-haired Jounin placed a loving kiss on the other's lips. "Forgive me, koi. I had to make a stop at Sasuke's house. I left him and Naruto a little present." Iruka frowned and sat back down, taking Kakashi with him. "What did you leave them?"

Naruto could swear he heard someone yell "WHAT?!" followed by a scream coming from Iruka's house, but he brushed it off and continued on his way. He knocked on Sasuke's door and waited a moment. When no one answered, he thought something was wrong. If Sasuke was training, he would've brought Sakura, who was on a date, or Naruto, so he couldn't be there. Sasuke wasn't one to go out and just party, so he had to still be at home.

Naruto walked around Sasuke's house until he found a window that was open a small crack. He gently pried it open and slipped into the mansion. He walked into the hallway and tried a door. It was locked. He tried the next one. Locked. It seemed like they were all locked. Finally, seeing a door that looked slightly different from the rest, Naruto tried it and easily pulled it open.

When he walked in, he was greeted by a horrible site. Sasuke, covered in blood, was lying next to a bed. Naruto gasped and ran to the unconscious boy's side. When he noticed it was from a bloody nose, he sighed in relief. Looking around, he realized this must be Sasuke's room. Then, his gaze fell on the bed, where the naughty box lay. He stood and went to examine it.

Looking in, he quickly pinched the bridge of his nose, to stop the bleeding. The only two who would have the nerve to send something like this would be Kakashi or Ero-sennin Naruto thought bitterly, grabbing the box and stuffing it in a closet with Sasuke's clothes. Before he could stop himself, Naruto reached out and grabbed one of the shirts and held it to his face, inhaling deeply. He sighed at the musky scent of his teammate, laced with a strawberry scent.

Getting control of his raging hormones, he put the shirt back on the hanger and turned his attention to his fallen comrade. As gently as he could, he picked up the ravenette and placed him on the bed. Then, he searched the bathroom for a washcloth to clean him up with. It wasn't hard, seeing as how the Uchiha was very organized. Wetting it with lukewarm water, Naruto went back to Sasuke and cleaned up the blood as best as he could.

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Sesshy: Well, this is chappie one and I'll get to working on the next Chapter ASAP!