Title: Much Madness Is Divinest Sense
Author: CocoaSnape
Disclaimer: JKR owns the Harry Potter universe. I am making no money from this.

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Much Madness Is Divinest Sense
by CocoaSnape

Severus Snape was flabbergasted, and he was becoming angrier with each passing second. He had received the most bizarre note from the Headmaster just minutes ago. Not only bizarre. It was outrageous! Appalling really.

The first sentence had been innocuous enough. Dumbledore seemed to be requesting a Pepper-Up potion. Snape wondered why he hadn't simply asked Poppy for it, since she stocked nearly all the routine potions that he prepared. But as he continued reading the note, he realized that that was not the potion Dumbledore wanted at all.

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Severus,

Would it be possible for you to prepare an invigorating potion for me? Andrew is quite exuberant and enjoys very long, very vigorous (and frequent) walks. I want to be able to…keep up…if you understand my meaning.

Thank you, Albus
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Positively overcome with rage, Snape hurriedly wrote his reply.

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Dumbledore could not believe his eyes. Here it was, after all this time, the conclusive answer in his hands. He'd been wanting to know for months now if Severus shared a romantic interest in him. But now that he had his answer, he was not at all happy – the contents of the missive were certainly not what Dumbledore wanted or expected. He re-read Severus's communication once more, hoping he had horribly misread it the first time.

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Headmaster,

Assuming that I have correctly interpreted the nature of your request, I apologize that I cannot comply. It is inappropriate and is certainly not part of my job description. I would appreciate it if you would refrain from such requests in the future.

Sincerely,

Severus Snape
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Severus seemed very upset, even offended by his dinner invitation. It didn't make sense. He had only asked Severus to dinner after all. And they had had dinner many times before. But Dumbledore realized that given the rather public revelation of his sexual preference, perhaps Severus had finally taken the invitation as it was intended – as a date.

'Inappropriate.' 'Not part of my job description.' Harsh words indeed.

Dumbledore emitted a deep sigh as he slumped in his armchair, feeling more defeated than he hadin years.

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Severus Snape couldn't sleep. He'd barely had a decent night's rest since he arrived just over a week ago. Snape had tried having a few glasses of scotch to calm down, but it didn't seem to be enough. Now, at well past 3:00 in the morning, Snape was, once again, pacing the corridors. He found himself wishing, for perhaps the first time in his life, that school was still in session so that he might have the opportunity to release his frustrations on curfew-breaking students.

Snape exited through the main doors, hoping some fresh air would clear his mind, when he spotted Andrew approaching from the Hogsmeade path.

"Damn."

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Andrew caught sight of Snape and panicked momentarily. He hadn't expected to run into the man now. What was he going to say? He tried hard to think but his brain was not working too well. He had been out drinking with his friends and he was completely sloshed. Suddenly realizing the problem, he cast a sobering charm on himself, and only a moment later grinned as a plan took shape in his now functioning mind.

Pretending he didn't notice Snape, he made he way towards the castle's main entrance with his previously unsteady gait, wanting Snape to think he was still drunk.

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Albus Dumbledore couldn't sleep. This situation with Severus had been keeping him up at night. Things had not worked out the way he hoped they would. And he realized how wrong he had been. When he had first thought up this mad plan, he had told himself that he just wanted to know how Severus felt about him. Of course he hoped that Severus had romantic feelings for him, but Dumbledore had told himself that he would be content with whatever Severus wanted, be it friendship or something more. Dumbledore only now realized what an utter load of malarkey that had been. He wanted Severus more than ever, and he was disappointed beyond words that he would never have him.

Dumbledore glanced through his office window and his high powered spectacles immediately identified two figures on the lawn heading inside. Severus and Andrew! For the love of Merlin! What was his nephew up to now? Dumbledore anxiously transfigured his nightshirt into day robes and hurriedly made his way downstairs.

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"What are you doing here?" Andrew asked Snape.

"Wanted to sneak in, did you? Does Albus know you're out gallivanting at this hour of night?" Snape inquired.

"First that woman and now you!? What are you in love with him too?" Andrew asked mockingly, deliberately slurring his words.

Momentarily shocked by the question, Snape hesitated in his reply.

"Bloody hell…you are!"

"I never said any such thing."

"Wait until I tell Albus," Andrew threatened, hoping to bait Severus.

"Go ahead," Snape replied calmly. "I couldn't care less what you tell him, you imbecile."

Damn the man's good! Andrew thought. As Snape turned and headed back inside the castle, Andrew followed.

"Hey, you're the potions guy. Do you have any anti-hangover tonic?"

Turning around sharply, Snape replied sardonically, "Ah, I seem to have run out. I haven't got around to 'cooking' lately."

"No matter, I'll just get Albus to fetch me some." Then Andrew added, with a significant leer to his voice, "He'll do anything for me you know."

"You want to sober up?" Snape spat menacingly. "Vomito."

Andrew was on his knees in less than a second, retching up the contents of his stomach. The feeling was far from pleasant, but he had been expecting worse. Once the hex dissipated, he stood up and demanded, "Why'd you do that?"

"It was long overdue."

Snape noticed the stone gargoyle at the end of the hall sliding to the side, followed by the Headmaster's appearance and rapid approach a moment later. Bloody hell!

"What's going on here?" the elder wizard demanded.

Andrew was the first to speak. He gave his uncle a significant wink, and snapped angrily, "Oh great, are you going to get on my case too? I was out! I told you I might not get back for dinner."

"I…" Dumbledore paused, uncertain of what to say. So he asked the first legitimate question that came to mind, "Andrew, are you drunk?"

"So what if I am?" Andrew asked derisively. "Why are you so uptight lately? Maybe you should be asking him the questions," Andrew said, pointing his finger at Snape. "He attacked me."

"What?" Dumbledore asked, bewildered by the accusation. He was unsure if this was part of Andrew's act as well.

"Headmaster, I did no such thing," Snape denied.

"He could have killed me, Albus!"

Snape voice echoed low and threatening, "I assure you, if I were trying to kill you, I would choose a much more painful method of death."

"What in Merlin's name is going on here?" Dumbledore asked irritably. He had very little idea of what to do or say in all this confusion. And why was Andrew pointing frantically at his neck?

"Just forget it. Albus, I need you to get me some hangover remedy for tomorrow. I'm totally hammered, and he won't give it to me!"

"I'll…I'll see what I can find, Andrew."

Snape was at a loss. Here was this insolent arse, drunk and out in the middle of the night and Albus was pandering to his every desire. Why was Albus allowing himself to be treated like this? A rather alarming possibility occurred to Severus – perhaps Albus was in love with this moron. Severus felt his stomach clench. It couldn't be! That made even less sense than Albus accepting this treatment.

"I'm going to bed," Andrew declared, pointing at his neck again while Severus's gaze was trained on Dumbledore.

"Andrew, what is that on your neck?" Dumbledore asked.

Finally! Andrew thought.

Snape's eyes darkened in surprise and then rage as he spotted the love mark on Andrew's neck.

"Oh my god, Albus, what is your problem? I've already told you…what I do on my time is my business. Now, I'm going to bed!"

Dumbledore stared at his nephew in shock, completely oblivious to the fury coursing through Severus's veins. After Andrew had made it down the hallway, Albus turned back around to face Severus. He was stunned by the man's outburst.

"Albus, what the fuck is going on here?" Snape was too beside himself with anger to care about the fact that his voice was raised.

Dumbledore didn't know what to say. Having already been rejected by Severus, he couldn't bear the added humiliation of having to explain that he had used his nephew in this elaborate ruse…in this desperate attempt to gain Severus's affections. Exhausted and frustrated, and wanting this night to be over, Dumbledore replied with false calm, "I'm very sorry if Andrew disturbed you, Severus. He does like to party. I've asked him to tone it down, but you know the young."

Snape's eyes widened. "I don't mean him. He's an obnoxious arse! I mean what the bloody hell is going on with you?"

"With me?"

"Why are you letting him walk all over you?"

"How is that any concern of yours, Severus?" Dumbledore asked with growing irritation.

"I'm your friend, or at least I thought I was!" Severus snapped.

"You are my friend, Severus, but last time I checked you didn't have a say over my romantic affiliations!"

"I…" Snape paused, unsure of what to say. He let his fury guide him, spitting resentfully, "What exactly does he do for you that's worth all this trouble?"

"I don't believe that is any of your business," Dumbledore retorted indignantly.

Dumbledore felt his own anger building. Severus had rejected him – and quite harshly at that! And now for him to still think he had a right, any right, to stick his nose into his love life (be it real or fictional) sent Dumbledore over the edge. Just the idea of it released a fury inside him that he didn't even know was there.

"I think this conversation has gone on far enough," Dumbledore warned sharply.

"Do you love him?" Severus demanded heatedly, ignoring Dumbledore's words.

"Excuse me?"

"Because either you love him and that's why you're letting him treat you like shit or he's a very good fuck. Which is it??"

"Now that is definitely none of your business!" Dumbledore snapped angrily.

"It is my business!!" Severus insisted.

"How exactly?"

The question stopped Snape for barely a moment.

"Just answer my damned question, Albus. Are you in love with him?" Snape fumed, his eyes dark and crazed.

"No."

"So this is about sex?" Snape asked, his voice incredulous, almost disbelieving – masking his profound sense of relief at Albus's answer.

Dumbledore couldn't believe this. Wasn't it enough that Severus didn't want him? Did he also have to suggest he shouldn't be having sex at all?!

"Do you believe me above that kind of thing, Severus? You think I'm too old for that, is that it?"

"I didn't say that!" Snape shouted, his body now trembling. Snape was struggling for breath, almost panting through his anger.

"But that's what you thought…the old man doesn't need it?" Dumbledore exclaimed, his voice harsh and full of resentment. "I've got news for you, Severus, I'm a man like any other!"

"If it's fucking you wanted, Albus, I would have been more than happy to oblige!" As soon as the words left his mouth, Snape's eyes widened in shock and horror.

Dumbledore could tell by the alarmed expression on Severus's face and the terror in his eyes, that he was half-expecting to be smacked, hexed or both.

It took Dumbledore a few moments to process Severus's words, to put them together with the look of utter mortification on his face. And suddenly, Dumbledore wanted nothing more in that moment than to ease Severus's distress, to take away the shame he saw burning in those dark eyes.

"Oh Severus," Dumbledore said, his voice suddenly low and gentle. He took a step forward, closing the distance between them and pressed his lips to Severus's in a tender, tentative kiss.

When he backed away just seconds later, Albus could almost feel Severus's incredulity. What had he done? He had just overstepped a delicate boundary between them. He began to blurt out an awkward apology, "I…Severus, I…I'm so sorry…I…"

Albus thought Severus must have moved, because suddenly their mouths were locked again. Overwhelmed by Severus's sudden movement and their proximity, Albus responded without thought. Hearing the faintest murmur of his name against his lips, he delicately swiped his tongue on Severus's lower lip and barely a moment later, Severus was granting his tongue entrance. Albus couldn't help but release a moan as the first taste of Severus hit him – so clean, and unexpectedly sweet, with lingering traces of scotch. Albus pulled Severus tighter to him, his hands encircling Severus's waist. He could feel Severus's hands exploring his body and soon their kiss was rapidly turning from soft languid discovery to frantic urgent movements driven by their pulsating desire.

Severus was finding it impossible to think, but in a brief moment of lucidity he was left half-wondering if Albus had lost his mind or if he was dreaming this entire encounter. Either way, he certainly wasn't going to stop and ask questions.

Finding a moment of coherence himself, Albus realized what Severus must be thinking, and broke the contact between them. He breathed, "Severus, this isn't about sex."

"I beg to differ," Severus replied darkly, pressing his body tight against Albus, crushing their burgeoning erections together.

Albus groaned at the contact, but managed to grind out, "Severus, stop for a moment. What I meant to say is that this is not only about sex. The truth is…I love you, Severus." Even as he said the words, he felt his throat tighten. He had no idea what Severus's reaction would be, but he knew that he was tired of playing games, tired of evading the truth.

"What?" Snape asked, his face a sudden whirlwind of emotions.

"I've loved you for so long I can't even pinpoint when I started to feel that way. Since Voldemort's defeat, I hoped we finally might be together. But after all these months, I had come to believe that you did not return the sentiment."

"You…?" Severus asked, unable to form the words. This could not be happening. Surviving the Dark Lord's destruction was already more fortune than he thought he deserved.

"Yes, Severus, I love you."

"Oh Merlin, Albus, I love you too."

Eyes widened in shock, Albus managed through his astonishment, "You do? I…I didn't think you…" Dumbledore paused, and tried to arrange his thoughts. "After I sent you that note asking you to dinner and you wrote back that it was inappropriate, I'd given up hope that—"

Now it was Snape's turn to be astonished. "Dinner?" he interrupted. "Your note didn't invite me to dinner! You asked me to brew you an 'invigorating' potion."

"A what? I did not," Dumbledore began fiercely, but deducing Andrew's involvement only a moment later, he added in a low voice, "Oh…"

Taking a deep breath, Dumbledore began, "This is all a big misunderstanding, Severus, and it's my fault. There is something important I have to tell you."

"Whatever it is, Albus, it can wait," Severus said as he stepped forward and captured Albus's mouth once more.

Neither man quite knew how they made it down that long hallway, each silently cursing the distance to Albus's quarters while at the same time savoring each second of this newfound bliss. Their bodies did a strange sort of tango down the corridor – at times moving quite rapidly, and at others pausing to rediscover how the other tasted – all the while never separating more than a few inches.

Any pretense of cautious gentleness, of unhurried restraint was lost once they made it past the gargoyle to the bottom step of the spiral staircase which began its slow ascent. Outer robes were shed at record pace and Severus's groans echoed loudly in the confined space as Albus forcefully pushed his body flush against his, the coldness of the rough stone on Severus's back contrasting perfectly with the exquisite heat of Albus against his chest. Severus squeezed his eyes shut, steeling himself against the intensity of the pleasure washing over him as Albus's hand masterfully caressed his aching arousal through his trousers. Having long lost all semblance of control, Severus began whimpering as Albus nibbled on his ear and whispered impossibly delicious promises of what he was going to do with him when they made it to the bed.

Dumbledore fumbled with the handle on the oak door for only a moment before resorting to a wandless charm, his concentration and hands otherwise occupied by more important matters. As Albus and Severus stepped inside, they both froze abruptly.

Having completely forgotten about Andrew, each man was equally stunned to see him standing there, a wide grin splashed across his face. He had already taken the liberty of packing a few items and he was dressed in his traveling cloak, ready to leave.

Andrew cut right through Severus's palpable discomfort. "I'll be back in a week to say a proper goodbye and get the rest of my things. Goodbye, Severus. Goodbye, uncle."

Andrew left before Dumbledore could say a word.

"Uncle?" Snape asked in utter confusion.

"That was what I wanted to speak with you about. Severus, that was my nephew Andrew."

"Your…? What?"

"It was a stupid thing to do, Severus. But I'd been trying to get your attention for months and I was too afraid to risk our friendship by being forthright with you. I was so desperate to know if you felt anything for me, I asked Andrew to stay here in the hopes that it might make you jealous. Things went a bit overboard, I admit. Are you very angry?"

"You did all this…to get me?" Snape asked, his voice steady, unreadable.

"Yes, I'm sorry."

"You wanted me that badly?"

"Merlin yes," Dumbledore breathed. "You're not too upset then? Because I—"

"Shut up, Albus, and take me to bed."

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Author's Note: Thank you all for your very kind words over the course of this short story. I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I loved writing this.

I'm working on finishing a first draft of the sequel now. It's entitled The Best Laid Plans... and picks up just a few days after this one leaves off. Albus tries to make amends for his scheming behavior by taking Severus on a romantic getaway. The sequel is shaping up to be even longer than the original. I will try to post the first installment before the Holidays. So keep an eye out or let me know if you'd like me to email you when I post it.

Thank you very much for reading. I look forward to your comments, as always.