He was on his knees.  His hand holding the gun firmly against his own heart.  His eyes were closed and he had his chin raised proudly as he willed his own execution.

"You're not done yet Heero.  Finish what you started.  Just kill me quickly"

Heero felt the sorrow he saw on Quatre Raberba Winner's face echoing  through his own heart.  True, he had declared that he would kill the boy, but now that he was face to face with this seraph who filled him with sentiment he had never felt before, he could not.  This boy, was not the same boy he had faced in the new Gundam, trying to destroy the colonies.  Heero could feel regret, pain, and confusion.  Somehow, he was linked with this boy and he knew that the boy here was not the same as the boy in the Gundam.  He just didn't know.  But he would not let himself stumble into killing another undeservedly.

He deftly released the hammer and pulled away.

"No."

Blue eyes flew open and now Heero could feel fear from the other boy.  Betrayal shone in the sky blue eyes and Quatre shook his head slowly, angrily.

"But…but I've killed so many.  I killed Trowa.  I tried to kill you.  I deserve it.  I'll… I'll do it again Heero.  You have to."

"No you won't."  Heero turned and started walking away, trying to escape these emotions even as he welcomed them.  A perfect soldier could not function with emotions like these.

Quatre climbed to his feet shakily and went after the boy.  He reached for the gun, but Heero turned and pulled away, pushing the smaller pilot backwards.

"Yes, I will!  Don't you understand?  I'm not strong enough to fight it!  Please.  You have to end this."

This last part was almost whispered in a small pleading tenor.  Heero stopped and turned.  His heart clenched as he watched the blond shake, his pale arms wrapped around himself as he shuddered.  Heero hurled the gun away from them and it made a loud "clang" as it hit one of the battered Gundams.  He walked to Quatre and he ducked to capture the liquid blue eyes with his own cobalt.

"I can't Quatre."

Quatre shook even harder and dropped to his knees, swaying unsteadily.

"but you said you would.  You… you said…"  He choked.

"Quatre."  His voice hitched on the word.

The blond bowed at the waist, swaying sickeningly, looking down.  His arms crossed in front of his chest as he cradled his heart.  Heero felt a twinge of pain within his own.  Unable to hold himself up under the weight of his sorrow, yet unable to let go, Quatre began to sob silently.  Even as Heero felt the pain within the boy, he recognized the strength that still held within the frail figure.  An underlying strength that refused to let the willowy body relax and fall to the ground.  As Heero focused on it, he realized that this strength was in fact his own, as if the other boy was drawing strength directly from the perfect soldier, even as he himself was drawing emotion from his fellow pilot.  But it was ebbing away.  Heero could feel the link loosen and fade and it took with it, the beautiful emotions it had been feeding him.

"No."  He whispered as he lurched forward.

*I have never been so alive as I am now.* he thought.  He dropped to his knees, staring at this boy, this creature to which he felt linked. 

Quatre's heart hurt.  He began to sink, curling in on himself as he fell toward the ground.  'so tired' he thought weakly.  The air around him was thick, and he let it seep into him.  He released himself to the heavy intrusion, believing in the miasma of his confusion, that  if he surrendered to it, it would seep into his lungs and further permeate his body to kindly dissipate him into the warm oblivion of death.  It even seemed to cushion him as he fell, lowering his body gently toward the ground and he relaxed into it as if it were the embrace of a lover.  If only he could seep into the surface beneath him and merge with the rocks and the metal, to become one with the inanimate.  He was so tired.  If he could just stop moving.  Just stop… just… just so he could rest… for a little while.

Heero blinked.  The boy had stopped breathing.  Willingly.  Heero felt the link continue to fade and he almost cried out, fearing the loss of those beautiful emotions.

*You can't!*  He thought as he bent forward and caught the boy before he sank to the ground.

Quatre felt something warm hit his chest.   The impact startled him and cold air rushed into his lungs as he gasped involuntarily.  His eyes itched as his vision began to clear.   The ground felt so warm beneath him, he thought, but as he began to come back to himself, he could hear the steady beat of a heart against him and realized that he had not hit the ground at all.

~Wake me