NoV: I couldn't resist writing another. (smile) Oh, and another little tidbit: I just absolutely freakin love this time of year!! All cold and snuggly….ahhh…..
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Quote of the day:
"Never give advice in a crowd."
-Arab proverb
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"So, what's the weirdest thing a person has ever said to you on the street?"
"Well….once this homeless guy said he was gonna shank me if I didn't step off his territory."
"An old woman once asked me how to get to the Penguin Room."
"I had a guy tell me that I should invest in garbage stock since it's always going up."
"Someone once told me that I looked like the reincarnated Buddha."
Being in stand-still traffic for three hours straight made for interesting conversation. The worst part of it was that they were only ten miles away from the ski resort that was their destination when they got into the horrific traffic. Nothing but honking cars for miles to come! Once again, Roger was behind the wheel with Mimi as his co-pilot. Maureen and Joanne sat in the middle seat, Mark, Angel and Collins in the back. They were, once again, going across the country to a remote location so that Angel could see Margo Fletcher's "oh-so-impressive" silk hat lecture. The gang was beginning to get cabin fever before ever getting to the actual cabin.
Maureen started giggling all of a sudden. She kept on giggling and couldn't seem to stop. Her laughter seemed to be contagious as Mimi started giggling up in the front seat as well. Then Angel started up in the back. This went on for a few minutes before Roger yelled, "What the hell is so funny?"
Maureen stopped her laughter long enough to answer, "Mark doesn't look like the Buddha!"
Everyone laughed at that.
Then they were silent. Roger turned on the radio to battle the boredom they all felt. A few minutes passed before Angel rolled down the window on her side. There was a tree branch hanging low near the window, so she reached out and grabbed a twig from it. From her position in the back of the van, she had the perfect opportunity to mess with the people sitting in front of her.
Collins watched in amusement as Angel slowly reached forward with the twig and tickled Joanne's ear. Joanne twitched and swatted at her ear, but said nothing. Angel covered her mouth with her hand to stifle the laughter. Then, once she had gotten herself under control, reached out to Joanne's other ear with the twig. Collins' smile grew as the twig lightly touched Joanne's ear and she shook her head roughly and scratched the side of her face. Then, Angel went for Maureen's ear. She stuck the twig through Maureen's thick hair and to her ear. Before Angel could pull the twig back, however, Maureen grabbed it on an impulse. Joanne looked over at the commotion, and realizing what had happened, she rolled her eyes. Angel, Collins and Maureen all had a good laugh.
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Half an hour later….
"We've got cabin fever, and we're all going MAD!" everyone in the back sang.
"Shut up!" Roger yelled. "We're here. Finally…."
It was true. Roger at last pulled the plum van into the parking lot of the beautiful ski resort. There was a huge cabin hotel, a colossal snowy mountain for skiing, a ski lift going up to the top, and hundreds of….interesting-looking people milling about. All those in the van were absolutely ecstatic to get out and into the fresh mountain air. It was a crisp, clean feeling and a cool, chilly day, perfect for snuggling.
"Let's go check in, shall we?" Roger suggested.
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After waiting in line at the front desk for over twenty minutes, they finally got up to the front. The hotel manager looked extremely exhausted, but greeted them with a smile, none the less. "Hello, and welcome to Shadow Mountain Inn. Do you have a reservation?"
"Yeah, it's under 'Margo-Fletcher-Is-So-Cool,'" Roger said quietly, rolling his eyes at Angel, who grinned widely.
The man raised an eyebrow, looking them up. "Okay, I have you right here. One deluxe suite."
"Yep," Roger replied. "So, what's with all the people?"
The manager grinned. "We have the pleasure of hosting the Annual Circus Act Convention," he said, excitedly.
Roger's eyes widened. "Say what?"
"Do you have enough rooms?" Joanne wondered, looking around at all the people.
"Well, actually most of them are staying in campers, tents, buses, you know," he said. More quietly, he said, "Circus folk." He shrugged, then called a bellhop. "There will be several performances this weekend. A list of show times is on the bulletin board in the lobby. I hope you enjoy your stay, everyone!"
Maureen had already run off with Angel to check out what performances they could see. Roger nodded at the bellhop. "I'm gonna bring the van around, okay?"
Roger and Mimi went back outside and got into the van. Roger shifted into drive and pulled up to the loading zone in front of the hotel. It was already packed with cars and only a tiny space was left to be parallel-parked in. Roger was having some difficulty maneuvering the large vehicle into the spot. He sighed. "Mimi, I'm gonna get out and let you park it, okay?" he said. "I'll wave you in."
"All right," Mimi agreed, as he got out and she hopped over into the driver's seat.
Roger stood between the plum van and a grey one parked behind it. He waved his arms slowly to inform Mimi that she could back up slowly. She did back up slowly at first, but then for some reason punched the gas, barreling the huge vehicle into Roger, who was thrown up onto the hood of the grey van.
"Oh, god!" Mimi cried, jumping out of the plum van and running up to Roger. "Are you okay, baby?" She touched his leg and he twitched.
Roger slowly slid off the van and barely stood on his own feet. He felt like he had a broken rib. "Ahhh…." he seethed in pain. "Okay, I just want to know why you hit me," he said simply.
Mimi grimaced, shyly. "Um….I thought I saw a bee," she answered.
Roger stared in disbelief. "You ran over me with the van because you thought you saw a bee?" he demanded. Mimi shrugged. "Bees don't even live up in the mountains, Mimi! They freeze, Mimi. They get frozen in the winter…"
"It looked like a bee, okay?" Mimi yelled. "It was just a dust bunny, though."
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Meanwhile, back in the lobby, the others of the group were watching a man who was showing off his trained tiger's tricks. "Bobo is completely harmless!" the trainer bragged, petting the animal around its jowls.
"Its name is Bobo?" Maureen asked with a slight laugh.
"Don't forget," Mark said, "you named a lobster Jeff."
Maureen stuck out her tongue at that. "Can I pet him?" she wondered.
"Of course!" the trainer exclaimed. "Bobo loves the beautiful girls, don't you Bobo?"
Maureen bravely went up to pet the tiger, which leaned into her hand affectionately. "Aw, what a cutie!" Maureen cried, rubbing its head.
Angel went over to pet him as well. "Ooh, it's just a big old kitty," she cooed.
Mark turned his camera on to capture the sweet display. "Does he come to you when you call him?" he wondered.
Joanne said jokingly, "Here, kitty kitty."
The trainer gasped and held tight to the leash but still the tiger managed to escape him and pounced on Joanne, knocking her to the ground. "Oh my god," Joanne squeaked from under the tiger. It licked her face.
The other four yelped in surprise, clearly not expecting Joanne to be jumped by a tiger. The trainer frantically ran over and tried to pull the big cat off of her. "Down, Bobo, get off the lady!" He gave a meek smile to Mark. "To answer your question, yes he comes when you call him."
Mark continued to film as the tiger was slowly tugged away from crushing Joanne. "Wow, I could send that to 'When Animals Attack'-and lick you," he said.
Maureen helped Joanne to her feet, dusting her off. "Are you okay, Pookit?"
Joanne gave her a look. "Sure, Maureen, I'm just fine," she said sarcastically.
"I'm so sorry!" the tiger's trainer exclaimed. "That's never happened before…."
Joanne scoffed. "That's what they all say…."
Mimi came running up and announced, "I'm gonna have to take Roger to the hospital. I hit him with the van….."
"What?" Collins asked.
"Yeah, it wasn't my fault!" Mimi insisted.
"I want to go too," Joanne moaned, feeling big bruises from the tiger's pounce and wondering if anything internal might be injured.
Maureen looked at Mimi and explained, "A tiger jumped on her."
"What?" Mimi said.
"I'll explain on the way," Maureen replied, helping Joanne toward the door.
"Okay," Mimi said. "I left Roger in the van." She turned back to Collins, Angel and Mark and tossed the hotel key to Collins. "Here, we'll be back as soon as we can."
Mark turned off his camera. "Why is it that everywhere we go we get beaten up and embarrassed horribly?" he wondered spookily.
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NoV: A shortish chapter one, but more will come, you can be assured! (Poor Roger and Joanne!) Oh, and my friend's mom once got pounced on by a cougar at an exhibition, so it's not as far-fetched as you might think.
Next time (!): Mimi falls, Angel is exposed, Mark has an….encounter, and Maureen is set on fire.