Disclaimer: I don't own any of the POTC or Harry Potter characters. J.K. Rowling and Disney own them, but I still wish can't I?

Harry Potter and The So Called Pirates

Chapter One

Jack Sparrow let out a deep sigh as he looked at the sunrise. The wind blew in his hair. He inhaled the deep scent of the salty sea air. A giggle broke the silence. Jack glanced over at the crew's quarters where Will and Elizabeth could be easily heard. He rolled his eyes and sighed again. He had been rescued by his crew, and that heart stealing wretch of a pirate Elizabeth, about two months ago. After the Black Pearl was raised by Tia Dalma, Jack set out to take those two lovebirds back to Port Royal and set off with his crew to do some actual pirating.

It would be just like old times. Well, except the fact that old Davy Jones was still after him. And that sack of bones, Hector Barbosa would be tagging along. "That mutinying, old flea bag," Jack mumbled. "Now ye wouldn't be talking about me, would you?" A voice sounded. Jack swore under his breath. Hector Barbosa walked up next to him.

"Beautiful day ain't it?" Barbosa croaked out. Jack nodded curtly. "I do hope you forgive me. Twas a terrible thing indeed to make ye go through a mutiny." Jack clicked his tongue impatiently. He'd rather have a conversation with ex-commodore James Norrington than with Hector Barbosa.

Another loud giggle sounded. Barbosa chucked. "Sounds like they're havin' a mighta bit a fun," he said. Jack shook his head. Elizabeth had played with his heart before deciding to go back to her beloved eunuch William. "Do I sense some betrayal?" Barbosa asked with a smile playing on his lips. Jack just looked at him and cracked his knuckles. Barbosa threw up his hands and walked away mumbling under his breath.

Jack smiled and turned around to watch the rest of the sunrise. Nothing was going to bother him today he decided. Then a loud moan could be heard from the crews quarters. Jack's smile fell off his face.

"Aye, captain!" Gibbs, the first mate, yelled from the crow's nest. Jack looked up. Gibbs was pointing out into the horizon. Jack squinted and looked towards the horizon. "What the hell?"

A large, black cloud crossed the sky. It was getting closer too. "Gibbs man the wheel." "Aye, aye, capin." Gibbs climbed down from the mast and took the wheel. Jack turned on his heels and walked briskly towards the crews quarters. Barbosa lurked in a corner talking to Pintel and Ragetti. Jack didn't like the look of them talking, so he gave them a sneer, but kept walking.

Jack rapped on the door to the crews quarters and opened it. He covered his eyes and loudly said, "I'm sorry to be interrupting your more fun times of engagement, but there is a bit of a problem out here, and we will need Will to help." Jack took his hand off his eyes for just a second and walked out. He smirked to himself at the naked sight of Elizabeth on top of Will. "I guess he isn't a eunuch."

Will came up to the deck, fully dressed, about two minutes later. Jack caught his eyes and made a crude hand gesture. Will turned a bright red and turned to help Gibbs take down the sails.

Elizabeth came up about five minutes later, and ignoring Jack's stare, went straight over to stand next to Will. Jack glanced at her one more time before turning to look at the odd black cloud still coming closer to them. "What is that?" he wondered. Pintel was holding the wheel steady so Jack went to the stern of the ship to do some serious thinking.

"I know I've seen that before," Jack said out loud. "I be thinking it's the mythological time warp funnel." Jack turned around at the voice of Barbosa. "The mythological time warp funnel?" Jack snickered. "That's just a myth." Barbosa looked him in the eye. "People thought the curse was a myth. People thought Davy Jones was a myth. And any sane person would say the Kraken is a myth. But you'd beg to differ wouldn't ya?" Jack was taken aback. His mouth stood agape. "That's what I thought," Barbosa said before walking away.

"Well how do you stop it?" Jack called after him. Barbosa looked back before yelling, "You can't."

Jack cursed and stomped his foot. He heard a laugh behind him. He turned and saw Elizabeth covering her mouth to stifle a giggle. "What are you laughing at?" Elizabeth shook her head and kept laughing. "Yeah, that's right. Let's all have a good laugh at old Jack." Elizabeth smiled her most seductive smile before going to put her arm around Will. Jack frowned and turned around.

The gentle breeze, blowing only moments ago, was now turning into a violent windstorm as the black cloud moved ever closer. Jack's hair was getting tangled. He reached to push it out of his eyes when he heard a gun cock behind his head. Jack slowly turned around to see Barbosa standing with Jack's gun in his hand pointed at his face. Pintel and Ragetti were standing behind Barbosa each holding a gun to a different person.

"Some people never change right?" Jack asked. "Aye. Some people can't stop but getting mutinied." Barbosa pushed Jack into the water. Jack surfaced, sputtering out the cold, salty water. He saw Gibbs and Will swimming next to him. Then he saw Elizabeth jump off the ship and land only feet away from him. He swam over to her. "Are you okay?" He asked. She only sputtered and swam towards Will. Jack rolled his eyes and turned to see the Pearl sail away.

The roar of the wind was barely able to be heard over. But Jack did hear Gibbs yell "Captain look!" Jack saw the big black cloud covering the sky over them. Then everything blacked out.

Chapter Two

"Bloody hell, must have had to much rum," Jack mumbled. He heard someone talking above him. Jack opened his eyes slightly. For a couple seconds all he saw was a few faint colors, but then his eyesight cleared up some. He saw dark figures, at least six of them, crowded at the end of the bed Jack was laying on. "Oh, the pirate is up," he heard a stern voice say. Jack's eyes finally adjusted to the darkness. He saw an older lady in a green robe staring at him over her half-moon glasses. Jack tried to sit up, but he found out that an invisible bond was holding him down. "Nymphodora, he still is still under the body-binding curse," came a rough man's voice. Jack heard a mumble of some incomprehensible words, then he felt a pressure come off his chest, and he found out that he could sit up. Another mumble of words later, a small, bright light was lit. Jack saw, after uncovering his eyes from the brightness, that it was coming from a short stick.

"What are we to tell him?" Asked the man with the rough voice, whom Jack could now see had a few chunks missing from his nose. "The truth of course," came from an entirely different person, a short girl, maybe sixteen or seventeen, with bushy brown hair. Jack looked around not believing his eyes. There were at least twenty people in the room. The stern lady with glasses, the deformed face man, the girl with bushy hair, a tall boy with freckles and bright red hair, a tall boy with black hair (sticking up in odd places), a young teenage girl with the same bright red hair as the tall boy, two identical twins with the same red hair, a odd girl with pink hair, plus a number of others all wearing an assortment of odd colored robes. Jack decided he was dreaming.

The girl with bushy hair stepped up to him "Hello, I'm Hermione Granger. Who are you?" Jack took her hand and shook it, deciding whether or not to trust these strangers. He decided that since there were about twenty of them and only one of him, he'd better not try to talk his way out of this. "I'm Jack. Jack Sparrow." The girl named Hermione smiled. She saw Jack shivering. "Oh, you must be freezing," she cried. Jack shook his head. He had been much colder than he was now. The girl smiled knowingly and took a stick out of her robe. She shook it, and a mug appeared in front of her, floating in mid-air. Jack jumped back. "Magic….." A mumble overtook the crowd in front of him. A few laughed.

"You all are magicians!" Jack yelled. "We prefer the terms witches or wizards," one of the red haired twins commented. Jack gasped. "I really must have had to much to drink last night, having these kind of dreams." The tall boy with black hair stepped forward. "Oh believe me, I took it much like you did too," he said with a laugh. "Only I was still in my same time period when I found out." Jack goggled at him. "What do you mean same time period?" Hermione stepped up again, the floating mug gone. "Well, you see, you fell through a time warp," she said quite calmly. Hermione nudged Harry. "Harry tried to bring his parents back from the past, but his spell was a little to powerful." Jack laughed. "Barbosa tried to tell me that one too." Hermione shook her head. "No, you don't get it. It's the year two thousand and six."