Disclaimer: No, I still don't have hallucinations of owning ANYTHING concerning Beyblade.
Oh, the song in this fic is "Fate" from Bleak and Ana Johnsson. Tragically, I also have no ownership of the song whatsoever. (By the way, I suggest you to read the lyrics carefully: they explain everything Kai and Brook feel towards each other I can't. The song just suited perfectly to their emotions!) (And as the song is a duet, you can imagine them singing to each other. Or on the other hand… please don't.)
Okay, so here it comes! Hope u like, thought it's not the original "happily ever after"! This takes place four years after BB season three.
Fate
/ You change the sound of my name
A moment of truth that I saw in your face
It hurts inside, a moment this vile that you brought alive
All the roads lead back to you /
It wasn't fair. Fate isn't fair.
The day I faced him in the battle, I could feel that destiny was making its work – after all, I had seen it in a vision.
I thought my destiny was to win, but I was wrong.
That, I could learn to live with. The shame, the loss of dignity – those are what I've grown used to during my life.
But I wasn't used to his fire, his passion, his… pain.
I wasn't not used to him. And it scared me, deeply.
But what scared me even more was the feelings that flooded through me as I watched the other wrapping arms around his waist the night exactly four years after that battle.
In the beginning, I hated Kai. But at that moment, seeing them together… I got a taste of what hate was really all about.
When the other bent to whisper soft words into his ear, and he leaned closer, I ran. Because something was growing inside of me, something I didn't want to be unleashed.
I'm still not exactly sure of how I ended up sitting onto the railing of that bridge – especially since it was December, and I was practically freezing to death.
I think I'd been sitting there for at least two hours when I suddenly heard snow rustling softly under approaching footsteps. Startled, I shifted to see who it was, almost losing my balance in the process. My heart made this jump as I saw him standing about ten steps from me, a look of deep worry in his auburn eyes.
My heart jumped again as I properly realized that he was truly standing there. That once again, he'd managed to find me.
This warm wave flooded through me, and I was almost overwhelmed by yet another feeling I wasn't used to, this time warm and comforting.
Was this destiny's work again? Had he been… led there? Or was I just losing the last bits of my sanity?
For a longest time we remained still, looking at each other, neither knowing what to say. And I almost held my breath, waiting…
/ Give me something to return to, in your heart
I fear nothing but to leave here
Without you for life
We were left in this world for each other
but I can't run from the fate
I've been fighting for so long /
" Are you going to jump?" Anyone else would've considered his words rude, perhaps even outrageous, but during the four years we'd known each other I'd learned to know him well enough to recognize the worry and fear in his tone.
But still, I had to challenge him. I looked away, into the dark, icy water streaming below. " Would you care?"
He made an irritated sound. For a moment, it was silent, until I heard snow rustling again. Some moments later, he was leaning against the bridge, also staring at the pitch-black water. He seemed to be gathering his thoughts.
It took a while before he spoke. " Why did you disappear like that?"
For a moment, I almost snapped You know damn well!, but managed to control my tongue. Instead I shrugged, not daring to look at him. I know he would've seen the truth: I wasn't skilled enough to lie to his face, no one was. " I just… needed fresh air." I shrugged again. " I didn't think anyone would notice." Though I hoped you would…
He snorted, amused. " It's your farewell party. Of course people notice."
I felt this twinge in my chest, but quickly wiped disappointment off my face. Instead I pulled up a mask of carefully trained smile.
First time in my entire life, I found myself questioning if travelling away to practise blading was the right thing to do, if… I was really supposed to chase perfection at all costs.
" It's good to go to Europe", I heard myself murmuring. I wasn't exactly sure of why I said it – perhaps to test if he'd care. After all, I was leaving for four months. Shouldn't he have cared at least a tiniest bit, even if he wouldn't have… felt towards me what I did for him?
It might've been foolish hope, but I could've sworn I saw this dark flash in his eyes. He bowed his head a little, two-toned bangs fell to shield his face. Crap. " I've heard Europe should be beautiful this time a year. And the bladers are top-class. You'll get good training."
The previous twinge returned, only thousand times worse, and it took all I had not to whimper out loud with pain.
Was that really all he had to say? Damnit, couldn't he see how much he meant to me? Couldn't he see what… what he'd done to me?
Because… when he'd defeated me, crushed me… And even now…
He made me who I really was, who I was supposed to be. He was the only one who could.
/ (You made who I am) /
He looked at me again, a deep frown upon his face. " Brook? Are you okay?"
I blinked, startled. He… couldn't read minds… could he? " Y – yeah…", managed to stammer, swallowing laboriously. " Why?"
" Because… you're crying."
I blinked again, heart beating furiously with shock and perhaps even fear. My hand was shaking as I lifted it to my face, gently brushing my cheeks with fingertips. True enough, they were hot and moist with tears.
His frown deepened as he also outstretched a hand, carefully wiping away my tears. His eyes were filled with this deep confusion as he searched my eyes, almost like trying to understand.
Unable to look into his eyes anymore – fearing that he might find too much – I lowered my gaze, and immediately wished I hadn't. Because what I saw made my heart shatter into millions of little pieces.
There, shining almost mockingly in the moonlight, was a painfully beautiful, silvery ring. I sign of promise he'd given to someone else.
Unable to stop myself, I made a huge, wounded cry as I lifted my gaze, once again meeting his bemused eyes.
And the moment his eyes met mine, they widened, filled with understanding and horror. " Brooklyn…" It wasn't the soft, tender whisper I would've wanted to hear. It was a sound of utter, feral terror, one that wild animals make when they fall into a trap.
And all the hope I'd received during our battle – of finding my spirit, of becoming stronger, of finding my way, and heck, of ever being cared about – became shattered. For a second time during the time we'd known each other, he smashed me to pieces.
This time, I could actually feel my tears as I bowed my head, squeezing my eyes tightly shut.
Suddenly, destiny showed itself to me more clearly than ever before. And I understood something I'd stubbornly refused to see before.
The moment I had laid my eyes on him, I'd given him my all – whether I'd known it or not. I had wanted him, more than I'd ever desired anything.
But he was never mine to have from the start with.
/ You made who I am
Until the dawn of time
I have walked alone
You tie up a storm
When all hope was lost
But time revolves
I have to let go
One never meant to be /
Time seemed to stand completely still as he kept staring into my eyes in shock and disbelief, as if trying to find something to prove himself wrong.
But the tears rolling down my cheeks left my room for error.
For what seemed like eternity we simply stood there, looking at each other like we'd met for a fist time. And suddenly, his hand that shock had frozen to my cheek felt unbearably hot, burned through skin and flesh.
I gave a choked sob, the lump in my throat nearly strangling me. " Kai, I… I'm sorry…"
A tireless age once again rolled forward before he finally managed to speak. " Brook… What… What do you want me to do?"
The question took me so off guard that for several moments, I couldn't react. Then, slowly, I shook my head, sniffing.
He wouldn't want to give me those things I wanted. And… I didn't even have the right to ask for them.
He gave a deep, entrapped sigh while lifting his gaze up to the stars, his painful hand finally slipping from my cheek. I, on the other hand, again stared at the infinite, black depths of the water, waiting for his judgement.
Many minutes passed before he finally spoke. " Brook…" He paused, hesitating. " Do you really…?" He trailed off.
I gulped. " I love you." Gosh, those vicious words hurt so much while making their way through my throat, and I could only imagine the invisible damage they did to our friendship. But if didn't matter anymore, no pain mattered. If he was out of my reach anyway, how could any words harm me more? I swallowed down tears as more of them spilled, too ashamed to look at him. " Kai, I… I'm sorry."
He didn't respond in any way, and suddenly the coldness of wintry night felt much icier than it had before. Biting my lip to fight against tears, I wrapped my arms tightly around myself.
Eventually, I decided that I just couldn't take it anymore: the icy silence was killing the little there was left of me. So fast that I almost tripled to the water, I got up from the railing, about to speed off as fast as I could.
But my breath caught into my throat, and my heart almost stopped beating when I felt a hand wrap around my wrist, holding on almost desperately.
Eyes widened with this utter amazement and incredulity, I turned my gaze to look at him. He seemed just as shocked as I was as his hand held on to me even more tightly.
For a long time, neither of us found words to speak.
/ Give me something to return to, in your heart
I fear nothing but to leave here
Without you for life
We were left in this world for each other
but I can't run from the fate
I've been fighting for so long /
My head was still spinning as I finally found my voice. " Why…?"
Gulping thickly, he shook his head, not finding an answer.
Slowly and hesitantly, I took a careful step towards him, and felt his entire body jolt as I rested my forehead exhaustedly against his shoulder. Gradually, most likely also uncertain, he wrapped one of his arms around my waist and pulled me close, leaning his own forehead against my head.
At that moment, his intoxicating scent overwhelming me, my head whirred with thoughts.
We'd both gone through a hell during our short lives, but we'd made it through. What if… What if there was a reason?
What if we'd made it for each other?
By the time we finally looked at each other again, my body was numb to the coldness attacking it. Yet another bang of grief made me shutter as I stared into those burgundy orbs, and realization hit me.
No one would ever understand us the way we did each other – even he could never learn to know Kai the way I did. We fulfilled each other, because we were polar opposites.
One of us… wouldn't exist without the other.
Was that why the thought of leaving him made me feel like I'd been dying? Was he dying, too?
God, I wish there'd been another way…
" I need you to give me something", I heard my voice working against my will.
He blinked in utter surprise. " What?"
As a surge of agony travelled through me, yet another tear escaped my eye. " I need you to show me… what it feels like… to be alive." I bit my lip. " For just a moment."
And as he frowned, not understanding, I slowly leaned forward and pressed my lips softly against his hot ones.
One moment that I managed to steal from fate.
/ We were left in this world for each other
but I can't run from the fate
I've been fighting for so long /
I felt fire boiling in my veins, and it was almost impossible to breathe as every fibre of my being teemed with electricity. My heart was beating so furiously that for a moment, I was sure it would explode. All I could hear was my heartbeat and the rush of my blood.
And then, just as suddenly as it'd begun, it was over. I'm still not sure of which one of us pulled away first, but we were both panting as we looked at each other, eyes widened. I could feel his warm breath against my skin.
Looking into his flaming eyes, I almost changed my mind.
But then, with the joyful voices of people leaving the party reaching my ears, I realized that there was no living in a dream anymore.
Burning tears trickled to my cheeks as I took one step backwards, then another. It wasn't until then I realized that his hand wasn't restraining mine anymore.
He was giving me a permission to leave.
For a while, something close to pain flashed in his eyes as he turned away from me. This time, it was his turn to stare at the dark depths.
I gulped thickly as I kept backing away from him. " Goodbye."
As he bowed his head, those cursed, silky bangs once again fell to hide his face. " Goodbye", he echoed in a small, hollow voice.
For several moments I stood there, almost like waiting for him to give me something – anything – that would've made me stay, something to come back for. But nothing like that came.
When I turned around and started to hurry away, tears I didn't bother to wipe away blinded my vision. And only one, excruciating thought was coherent to me.
This is true fate.
I had stolen Kai for a moment, but that was it. Even if we'd live thousand lifetimes, in each and every one of them he'd belong to someone else.
And neither of us could escape that.
¨
Unbeknownst to Brooklyn, Kai squeezed his eyes tightly shut. Fists clenched around the bitingly cold metal of the bridge-railing as he desperately restrained himself from running after the forbidden.
They'd fought for too long to fall like this now. They both had other paths to follow…
Tears meandered down his snow-white cheeks, shining like diamonds in the moonlight. Then, his lips inched just slightly, letting out a tiny whisper. " I love you, too."
But the only one that heard him was the cruel, unforgiving wind that slashed his furiously trembling body like thousand knives.
And as darkness closed itself around him, a part of him died silently.
/ Give me something to return to
in your heart
I fear nothing but to leave you
Without you for life /
Owari.
A/N: (sniff) You know, I almost cried when writing this one. (sniff, sniff) Was this any good?
(Btw… I'm sorry I left that mysterious fiancé of Kai's unravelled – I think it would've spoiled the Kai-Brooklyn thingy if I had pulled in someone else. Besides, I felt like leaving something to your imagination.) (BUT if you want to have my opinion… I think it could've been Tyson or Tala. Judging by what I know of season three – which is unfortunately little – those two just seemed like the two most potential boyfriends for Kai.)
Thank you guys so much for reading! It would be nice if you sent a review… (gives huge puppy-dog eyes) Please…?
Be safe!