I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO THANK ALL OF JOO FOR YOUR AWESOME REVIEWS! I MEAN, I HAD NO IDEA THAT SO MANY PEOPLE WOULD ENJOY MY LITTLE BOUTS OF INSANITY! THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!

A/N: Umm…what to say, what to say…I may have gone off the deep end with this. I needed a strange release and this was it. It's kind of mocking all those Sess/Kag stories that always seem to follow the same plot line. But it's all in good fun and I harbor no ill will toward any of the writers who have stories with the implied plot(s).

SBW

A/A/N: I was feeling very strange so this isn't exactly a mockery, mostly strangeness with a little parody in it.

Disclaimer: SOB! I don't own them!!!!

Instant Love!

Summary: A little mockery of the overuse of some fanfic plots, mainly Sess/Kag. Just a bit of fun, please enjoy! Excerpt- "HOT OFFICE SEX!"

"OH! Woe is me, I have been forced back to my time without the chance to say goodbye to any of my friends!" Kagome cried, even though she had been home for years now (talk about clinging to the past, geez!).

She had been sent back to her time and somehow managed to graduate high school. It was a miracle! Hallelujah! Angel's sang from on high as she grabbed her diploma…then she managed to go to college for a couple years.

"I guess I better get going! Today's the day I start my secretary job over at Takahashi Corp. You know…that name sounds familiar…like a manga artist who's drawing my life or something. Hmm…" Kagome tapped her chin thoughtfully.

Kagome left her awesome apartment that she had somehow managed to afford on absolutely no salary at all while she was still paying for college (how the Hell did she do that?), and climbed into her car that she could also afford surprisingly. She made her way to the largest building in the entire city that she seemed to have never heard about until after her travels in Feudal Japan.

"Going to work, I'm going to work…I'm going to work for Sesshomaru in an office job that's just so fitting for him…" Kagome sang in a foreshadowing manner, picking today to think about how awesome it would be to run into any of her old friends at the office.

She climbed into one of the MANY elevators and thought to herself, "This would be a great place for a hot lemon to take place in this fic."

Humming a happy tune as Kagome found her way to the office where she would work with absolutely no problems whatsoever, Kagome knocked on the door.

"Mr. Takahashi, I'm h- HOLY CRAP! SESSHOMARU!" Kagome screamed, still walking into the office as normal as ever.

"Miko, priestess, woman, wench. How are you still alive?" Sesshomaru asked from behind his massive desk, sitting in his Armani suit.

"Weeeeellll…I was originally from this time and (enter the well story here)…and here I am!" She chirped, now sitting across from him with her feet up on his desk.

"This Sesshomaru already knew of your being from this time." He stated coldly, occasionally stealing glances at the surprisingly flawless legs being revealed to him by a skirt that slid up her thighs.

Unfortunately that was when Kagome stood up, "Well if you knew then why did you ask?!?!?"

Sesshomaru shrugged, "I have nothing better to do until my 3 'o clock meeting."

Kagome huffed and turned on her heel stomping her way to the door. Sesshomaru watched her hips sway and thought,

"Man, I would totally smack dat ass!"

Kagome walked into the door once and fell onto her butt, blushing so hard that she glowed like a neon sign, burning Sesshomaru's eyes with her intensity. Then she dusted her butt off and made it through the door this time, unscathed.

As Kagome sat at her desk she began to think a lot,

"Wow, is it just me or is Sesshomaru looking extremely hot today? I mean, he was hot in the Sengoku Jidai but DAMN! In that suit, I swear, I was totally ready to jump him and rip off all his-"

"Woman!"

"HOT OFFICE SEX!" Kagome shouted, shocked by Sesshomaru's sudden appearance by her desk, not at all bothered by the fact that he had tried to kill her multiple times in the past.

"…what?" Sesshomaru had been thinking along the same lines only his was more "hot elevator sex" though he hadn't shouted it to the entire building.

"That's it, we're going to skip the whole really getting to know each other stuff and going straight to the hot office sex!"

Kagome jumped up, feeling very hot and prepared to jump on Sesshomaru, she grabbed his hand and yanked him into the office. After slamming the door and locking it, she began to remove Sesshomaru's clothes and things got really hot.

Outside of the office, the other workers could hear the two:

"Say 'Die InuYasha!'"

"Die InuYasha!"

"OH…ah…AH! Sesshomaru!"

AFTER TEH NASTAY SEX!

"Sesshomaru?"

"Hmm?"

"How come we never did anything like this back when I was in your time?"

"We didn't have a desk and I had no idea how to use a-"

"NOT THAT!" Kagome blushed again, but Sesshomaru had his eyes closed so he wasn't nearly blinded this time, "I mean us getting together."

"Though you interested this Sesshomaru it was beneath me to rut with a human."

"You were interested me? Wait, it was beneath you?"

"I am less inclined to be picky now that there are very few demonesses around and, over time I seem to have…well…grown. It seems that most women find me too large!"

"I mean great Kami, Sesshomaru! It would take a yard stick to measure that thing! How can you keep it in your pants…it's got to be like rolled up or something."

"Yes…it tends to take me quite a while to get my pants on."

"I love you."

"What the Hell? Where did that come from all of a sudden out of nowhere?"

"I've always loved you and your insanely huge penis and I can't believe I'm finally getting the chance to say something!"

Sesshomaru eyed the strangely enthusiastic woman, "Come, I'll have Jaken bring the limo around and we will go back to my massive estate and have sex in every room in the huge mansion!"

IN THE LIMO!!!

"What happened to everyone else after I left?"

"Why are you asking that now, in the middle of our limo smex?" (XD I totally wanted Sesshomaru to say "smex"!)

"Just answer me!!!!"

"InuYasha went to Hell, Shippo grew up and married Rin then Souten and Miroku and Sango got married and repopulated the slayer's village and then started a new one. Kouga works at Takahashi Corp. under me, Jineji's my gardener, Kilala (the misspelling of her name was intentional, it bothers me that people don't take the time to find out how her name is actually spelled) disappeared into parts unknown, Kagura and I had a fling before she went incestuous and went after Kanna, Shippo also works under me now, Kaede died of old age, and-"

"Geez, why in the world did you keep tabs on everybody?"

"I knew you'd asked."

"How'd you know I'd run into you?"

"I…hmm…let's go back to the smex!"

LEMONS HERE, LEMONS THERE, LEMONS, LEMONS EVERYWHERE!!!

"Sesshomaru? Why did you name the business Takahashi Corp.?"

"Because the name sounded like someone who was drawing a manga about me and I didn't have a last name…so I just used hers!"

MORE LEMONS BECAUSE THE LUST-FILLED SESSHOMARU AND KAGOME CAN'T KEEP THEIR HANDS OFF OF EACH OTHER

Sesshomaru and Kagome have a falling out about a week after the sex-spree and Kagome finds out she's pregnant!

"Oh no! I'm pregnant! Well, I'm definitely NOT telling Sesshomaru, who is definitely the father, because I'm angry with him. I'm just going to disappear for a few years and show back up with a daughter!"

A FEW YEARS LATER…

"Kagome, I've been looking everywhere for you! I want you to marry me and have my children!"

"Of course I'll marry you…but I've already had your child. This is our daughter!"

"A daughter? She's beautiful! Come back and live at my mansion, I will treat you like Cinderella! I'll be the wonderful prince and not the horrid stepmother. Let's go!"

"Happily Ever After-ness!"