Just A Nobody – The Soundtrack

Impulsive – Fate of the Unknown, KH 2 Final Mix soundtrack.

III – Silence, Shadow of the Colossus Original Soundtrack.

Oblivion – Requiem for the Lost Ones, Bleach Soundtrack 1.

IX – Descendant of a Shinobi, Final Fantasy 7 Soundtrack.

Muffins – I'm Going Slightly Mad, by Queen.

VIII – Beethoven's 5th Symphony, by the Trans-Siberian Orchestra.

Blood – The Hate In Me, by Godhead.

VII – Somebody's Watching Me, by Beatfreakz.

Kairi – Aerith's Theme, Advent Children Soundtrack.

II – Practice Ditching Susano-O, Okami Soundtrack.

Wonder – Set You At Ease, Dino Crisis Soundtrack.

X – Sharp Dressed Man, by ZZ Top.

Prayer – Bounce-O-Rama, Kingdom Hearts Soundtrack.

I – Dance With the Devil, by Breaking Benjamin.

Choices – Close Every Door to Me, by Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat.

XIII – On the Precipice of Defeat, Bleach Soundtrack 1.

Escape – The 13th Struggle, Kingdom Hearts 2 Soundtrack.

Heartless – Destiny's Force, Kingdom Hearts Soundtrack.

Guardian – In Memoriam - Light's Theme, Death Note Soundtrack.

Yes, I used a lot of Kingdom Hearts songs. Really though, why throw away something because it fits so well?

Status of Just A Nobody as of February 9th, 2008.

Words – 31886.

Reviews – 100. Yay.

28 Favs. And 24 alerts.

Hits: 10,437.

Chapter 16 seems to be the most popular, shortly followed by chapter 3.

Okay, good.

Ahem. So, Riku, what did –

Riku: Shush! Not so loud!

- The boy wonder looks like he is about to refuse an explanation, but sighs and relents, his gorgeous head drooping in shame. –

Riku: It's the fangirls. They keep finding me somehow, and it seems like the mere mentioning of my name alerts them.

Ah, my apologies. So then… Ridsha. What made you decide to take up the lead role in this production?

Riku: Honestly? I was kind of sick of always playing second fiddle to Sora. Don't get me wrong, the guy is my best friend, but I needed some me time, you know? Being imprisoned in a castle full of emotionless sociopaths seemed like a good way to get some alone time and work out my thoughts.

…I…see….

Riku: Ha ha ha, got you. You really believed that? Heck no, I'm not that crazy. No, the real reason was Random One-Shot offered me a real good paycheck. I have bills and the Kingdom Hearts figurines only rake in so much, you know? Once all the money gets split between me and other characters, there isn't much more than what I need for my living costs. I've been wanting to take a vacation, see the world and all that, and now that I'm through with this story, I finally can.

Interesting. So, where were you thinking of heading?

- Riku grins. –

Riku: I want to….

- He seems to remember that this conversation is being recorded. –

Riku: Actually, I probably shouldn't say it out loud. Fangirls, you understand.

- The interviewer nods understandingly.-

'Damn it, he's on to me.'

All right, then may I ask you a personal question?

Riku: Shoot.

Is there any romance brewing between you and one of the female stars of Kingdom Hearts?

Riku: GAH! What is with that question?! It seems like I've been paired with everyone under the sun and yet people still want more! THERE IS ONLY SO MUCH OF ME TO GO AROUND!

…………

- Riku is breathing heavily, and then calms himself. –

Riku: I'm sorry. The answer to that is my business alone. If word got out that I was seeing someone, and I'm not saying that I am, she'd either be killed by fangirls or aided by fangirls. Really, I'm not sure which one would be scarier.

It's that bad?

Riku: You haven't the slightest clue. I have to put a combination lock on my underwear drawer. MY UNDERWEAR! The one time I went traveling without a secure travel bag, someone looted all my socks when I wasn't looking. Two weeks later, I found out that they had sold on Ebay for $7,600.00 a piece.

Wow.

Riku: I know.

Only $7,600.00?

- Riku glares at the interviewer, and then, slowly, his look changes to one of horror. -

Riku: Oh God, no. You're one of them!

Well, my cover is blown.

Riku: AUGH!

- Riku attempts to run and finds the only door securely locked. -

Now Riku, don't be difficult. No one knows where you are, and I have the only key. I just want a simple favor and then you can go.

Riku: Liar!

- The door suddenly bursts open and smacks Riku to the floor. Xigbar sees Riku and hauls him up to his feet. -

Xigbar: Go man, go! Donald and Goofy are waitin' to escort you outside, but you gotta be fast. There's a freakin' HORDE of those crazy chicks comin' here, fast!

- Riku runs. -

Donald and Goofy?

Xigbar: They're the only ones he stands no chance of being paired with.

Ah, I see. I'll have to stop him before he reaches safety then.

Xigbar: Not gonna happen, lady.

So, you would stand between me and my object of devotion? Most unwise, Xigbar.

Xigbar: -Laughs- Lady, I'm number II in Organization XIII! What can you… AUGH!

- the moral of this short story -

- never get between a fangirl and her idol, as bad things will happen -

'I remember now. Saïx, the Luna Diviner. There are eight members of Organization XIII left and I get the fucking psychopath to haul me back from an escape attempt.'

Riku sits up and gets one brief glimpse of a wild face above a black coat before Saïx's booted foot completely misses its target as Riku throws himself to the side. Unbalanced, the Luna Diviner falls back and lands hard on the concrete. He is semi-dazed until his claymore lands on his face, which finishes the process of knocking him out.

Riku blinks.

"Um… medic."

Demyx nods. "Yeah, for a few years now. I think they got here when a gummi ship crashed and they were hitching a ride. Anyway, they started breeding and now they almost outnumber the Nobodies. Vexen used to catch them and use them in his experiments."

- Until he died anyway…. -

- Huh. I always figured him for more of a gerbil man -

- You can actually have a preference for rodent lab subjects? -

- Certainly. Gerbils have a higher shock tolerance and more lung capacity then the average lab rat -­

- ….Do I want to know how you know that? -

- Of course you do! Also, weasel intestines, when dried, make wonderful guitar strings! –

- Didn't need to know that -

- Sparrows can be fired from an air gun with an expected air-speed velocity of 130 kmph -

- Didn't want to know that -

- And the taste of sewer rat is indistinguishable from that of lamb when seasoned with ginger! -

- Dude, sick! -

"…What?!"

Riku looks away from the high-intensity lights and sees Naminé, Mickey, and DiZ staring at him. Naminé is crying.

"I come here," Naminé sobs, "expecting a simple 'thank you for saving my life Naminé', but what do I get upon waking you up? You said her name!"

The blonde runs off, sobbing.

Mickey sighs and hops up onto the autopsy table. Riku suddenly realizes he is completely naked.

"Now Riku," Mickey says. "You should talk with Naminé after this and let her know that it can't go on."

Riku blinks. "What 'can't go on'?"

Mickey gives him A Look. "I know what a young boy is dreaming of when he wakes up and says a girl's name all breathless like that. I won't blame you for your subconscious, but for Naminé's sake, you should – "

"I was not having that kind of dream!"

- and finally, a lot of you responded to the Xemnas chapter hoping that I would break Riku into teeny, tiny pieces. It didn't happen in the actual story, but this part here is for you -

Ten Days

It was a year ago, but the memories of Sora's blood and Kairi's lifeless body and all the darkness, everywhere, all across the universe, were still fresh in his mind. Riku could not bring that back. If Xemnas wanted Sora to open Kingdom Hearts, then, one or another, he would get Sora to open Kingdom Hearts. And all those hearts that were not the Nobodies' would be drifting loose to be transformed back into Heartless.

And that cannot be allowed to happen.

--- --- --- --- ---

fear drives the boy now

--- --- --- --- ---

Riku dives.

The darkness is painful. It has been so long since he was this weak in the dark that he has forgotten how hard it is to control the corridors when you have so little power. The floor that isn't there bucks beneath him and he staggers, swaying and fighting to keep his balance.

The parasite in his heart is awakening. The realm of darkness is recharging it like sunlight to a flower. Riku knows he does not have much time, but he is so tired and he just wants to rip open a hole to somewhere warm and dry, and sleep for a year. His thoughts are blurring and becoming slurry in his mind.

He does not even see Xemnas until he bangs into a black-coated chest and feels two strong hands latch onto his shoulders.

"You have made the wrong choice," Xemnas says.

--- --- --- --- ---

his situation alters

--- --- --- --- ---

In a matter of minutes, Riku's whole world narrows down to three simple objectives:

Do not give in to the darkness.

Do not tell them where Sora is.

Do not scream.

--- --- --- --- ---

the third objective is lost in an hour

--- --- --- --- ---

His blood reeks. His clothes are stained with it beyond repair and, through the pain and the screaming and the 'don't tell' and the fear, Riku wonders what Naminé would say about his state of dress.

'She'd scream, you stupid loser,' comes the answer.

Hands knot into his hair, which has been chopped short to a bare inch of silver scruff. His head is raised from the floor and he sees Xigbar's cold, lonely eye staring at him.

"Just give up," Xigbar says with an easiness that belies how many times this has happened before. Or is it that he just does not care?

'No heart. Not Heartless, but no heart.'

"Tell Superior what he wants to know and you can die. Heck, maybe you can even leave. Superior promises not to turn you if you tell."

'Tattletale, tattletale, I am not--!'

Riku spits at Xigbar's feet.

"Your choice, man."

--- --- --- --- ---

on the first day he does not break.

--- --- --- --- ---

Axel is better than Xigbar, in a way.

Xigbar is cold and impersonal. His treatment makes Riku feel like he is not human, like he is not something of consequence.

Axel hates Riku, as much as a Nobody can hate, and this makes Riku remember that he has some power.

The fire burns and the chakrams puncture and the kicks break his bones and the Hi-Potions undo all the damage so it can start again, but Riku gets through it.

Axel reminds him of what he has to lose.

--- --- --- --- ---

on the second day he does not break

--- --- --- --- ---

Saïx is not allowed near him alone.

When the Luna Diviner comes, Luxord is with him, ready to restrain the berserker if his bloodlust gets the better of him.

The claymore is gone, but Saïx works just fine with his fists. Breaking, cracking, shattering, grinding Riku down to nothing but calcium dust inside of a meat suit. Riku spits out more teeth than he thought he had. A Hi-Potion is shoved between his lips and forced down his throat. The tingling feeling restores his body to some degree of wholeness.

Riku can now count down the seconds it takes for him to heal.

One – vial in mouth.

Two – liquid down throat.

Three – bones rearrange.

Four – bones rearrange.

Five – muscles regrow.

Six – headache clears.

Seven – Saïx comes back.

As Luxord leaves, Saïx stumbling along ahead of him with blood on his knuckles, he looks down at Riku and says, "Try not to crack for another two days. Xigbar and I have a bet, you see."

--- --- --- --- ---

on the third day he does not break

--- --- --- --- ---

Xaldin is patient.

There is no injury inflicted.

No, he is a more passive sort.

Binding Riku's arms behind his back, forearms crossed over each other, and then sliding a lance through the gap between spine and arms. Xaldin sends the pointed tip of the lance deep into the wall.

And then he waits.

Riku stands, feeling his already weakened legs slowly grow numb. Each time he stumbles and falls, his arms are forced to the point of dislocation bearing his weight. It is horrible, knowing that the only thing bringing him pain is his inability to stand on his own two feet.

It is humiliating.

--- --- --- --- ---

on the fourth day a crack appears

--- --- --- --- ---

Demyx hurts.

Not the body, no. Riku's body is tough. It can endure.

What Demyx hurts is Riku's cracked, throbbing, ripped up heart.

He sings of sunlight and green fields and clear water and laughter and friendship and happiness and a cool breeze and freedom.

He leaves a pan of pure, icy cold water beyond the bars of the cell and just out of reach of Riku's parched fingertips.

He leaves and Riku finds that he cannot remember what the sunlight felt like.

--- --- --- --- ---

on the fifth day the crack widens

--- --- --- --- ---

Roxas does nothing but stare at him.

That works just fine.

--- --- --- --- ---

on the sixth day the crack deepens

--- --- --- --- ---

"This can end. Just tell me where he is."

Xemnas stares at Riku from beyond the cell bars. Riku is on his side.

There are no mirrors in his prison, and he is glad for it. His hair, which he was so proud of, has now been chopped off, burned away, and ripped out, according to who had him at what time. His is covered in dried blood. His blood. He is fed and watered only enough to keep him alive and never satisfied. His ribs and hips are beginning to stick out sharply. His clothes are shredded, what few articles he is allowed to keep.

He wonders if his friends would recognize him now.

Unlikely.

"What is he to you that you would suffer for him like this? A friend? You can make new friends. The Keyblade master? There is more than one."

Riku is not listening.

"This will continue for as long as necessary, Riku. Do you think we don't know how to keep a person alive for weeks? Months? You are wrong. This is not the first time someone has proven to be stubborn. I will get what I want, Riku. I always do."

Not listening.

Xemnas is leaving.

"If you think you are unbreakable…."

Not listening.

"…Ask Saïx how I cured him of that awful temper of his."

'Not. Listening.'

--- --- --- --- ---

on the seventh day the crack spreads

--- --- --- --- ---

'I hate Sora, I hate him for putting me through this, I hate him.'

'It isn't his fault! You chose this because he needs to be hidden. If they got a hold of him – '

'Fuck the universe! I. Don't. Care. About. The. Universe.'

'Kairi would get hurt again, do you want that? Mickey would get hurt and DiZ.'

'Hatethemhatethemhatethemhatethem.'

'No, I don't.'

'Yes, I do.'

'They're your friends.'

'I want this to stop. I want this to… to just…'

'It is necessary.'

'NO IT ISN'T!

'Be a man! I don't take the easy way, remember?'

'Fuck the promise.'

'They. Will. Kill. You. The moment you tell them, you are useless to Organization XIII.'

'Good.'

--- --- --- --- ---

on the eighth day the second objective is lost

--- --- --- --- ---

The part of Riku that is still Riku, tried and true, notes with some smug satisfaction that the expression on Xemnas' face means that Sora is not at the Twilight Town safe house.

Part of Riku had always known that he would break. That part of Riku had gone from 'don't break' to 'hold out long enough for the others to get away'. DiZ is not stupid. Riku not returning means Roxas was not retrieved. It means that Riku could be the one in a cage. Only a stupid man stays in an unsecured location.

And DiZ is not stupid.

Now Xemnas will never find Sora.

The broken bits and pieces of Riku that are no longer the confident, penitent young man start screaming in terror and pain as Xemnas begins collecting his consolation prize.

--- --- --- --- ---

on the ninth day there is only one thing left to him

--- --- --- --- ---

The last thing – don't give in to the darkness – is being lost.

Riku is turning into something not Riku. Something bestial and cringing and afraid and willing to do anything to make the pain stop, to make the horrible not-people who have become his whole universe, his gods and his demons, leave him alone for just a few more minutes.

The spark that is his heart is being drowned in inky, grasping black.

And there is something with that spark, greedily trying to devour it and take its place.

And Riku – who has to verbally remind himself over and over again what it was like to be taken over the first time – does not want that thing coming back.

Riku dives.

It is waiting for him.

"For the last time," one of them says.

There is a struggle.

There is a victory.

When the boy opens his eyes and sees Xemnas reaching for him with darkness smoking off of his hands, the last thing Riku of Destiny Islands thinks is 'could he feel when I killed i–'

--- --- --- --- ---

on the tenth day he has failed in everything

--- --- --- --- ---

The Nobody breathes.

There are others around it. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight. The number seems important.

The memories rush in.

It remembers who it is. Or rather, who it was.

One of the others bends down in front of the Nobody. From another life, the newborn creature remembers someone to fear and hate.

"Welcome to unlife, Kurix," says Xemnas.

--- --- --- --- ---

I could not inflict that on poor Riku in the actual plot. In a bonus chapter, however….

Riku, forgive me.

Again, thanks be to all liked this story.

There won't be any more updates to this fic – ever – past this point, so enjoy this last treat.

Ciao!