Five Worlds Without Prince Zuko

(PotC: Deadman's Chest)

"There he is! I can see the black sails now!" Zuko shouted down to the helmsman. "Set our course full speed ahead. We catch this pirate bastard today! I WILL capture Jack Sparrow and restore my honor!"


(Adventures of Batman and Robin)

Catwoman purred and stroked Batman's chest. "You are coming to me for information?"

"It takes a thief to know one."

The slender woman took the picture from the vigilante's hand and smirked as she saw the blue oni mask. "Oh, yes. I saw him a few days ago, Bats. He's new in town, but not inexperienced."

"Human?"

"As far as I could tell-- fought well with his hands and feet and with his two broadswords, but I don't think he'd win against you yet. I heard he managed to hack into Wayne Tech and steal half a million dollars."

"Do you know his name?"

"He was as grouchy as you are, Bats, and just as paranoid. Don't expect a real identity any time soon, but the boy called himself the Blue Spirit."


(Harry Potter)

"Zuko!"

Well, it was his turn at last, the boy thought bitterly. His name would be at the very end of the alphabet. He sat on the stool and slipped the tattered hat over his head, the last thing he saw being his sister smirking at him from the Slytherin table. She had told him all about the Sorting years ago just to be spiteful even though he knew most adults kept it secret.

/Well, well, what have we here-- a healthy desire to prove yourself, yes, but courage and the will to get up after having been beaten down-- hmm..."

Slytherin! Zuko thought desperately. Put me in Slytherin.

/That could work, I suppose/ the Hat said. There was an agonizing minute spent in silence. /You certainly have the heritage and the blood./

My sister and my father would kill me if you put me in Gryffindor, he protested. /please, for the sake of my honor./

/Honor.../ Zuko winced at the contemplative tone the Hat used and held his breath. /Very well. If it is truly what you desire, I will put you in/ "SLYTHERIN!"

/--but don't say I didn't tell you you would have been happier in Gryffindor./ the Hat added before Zuko tore it off. It sounded almost regretful.

He met his sister's crooked grin with one of his own as he made his way on unsteady feet down to the Slytherin table, still feeling shaky from the encounter with the magical Hat. Zuko shuddered as he glanced over at the Gryffindor table, decked in gaudy red and gold . . .


(Kenshin: Legendary Swordsman)

"You're obstructing justice, Battousai," the pale faced cop growled, settling into the stance of someone ready to fight. Kaoru watched with wide eyes, her hand covering her mouth and glancing up at the tall boy beside her who had reluctantly agreed to learn kenjutsu from her while he stayed at the dojo. "The boy is a traitor and a thief. He stole a horse from a woman and girl who had nothing and had given him shelter for the night. He is the worst kind of criminal and a coward."

"Is... is that true?" Yahiko asked the older teen, backing away from the young man he had started to admire just as much as Kenshin or Sano. Golden eyes narrowed but the teen stared down at the ground and Yahiko knew Saito was telling the truth.

"Where is your uncle, boy?" Saito inquired.

"We parted company." Lee's voice was surly and angry.

"Well, well. I suppose I can always catch him later as well, fugitive."


(Firefly 'Verse)

Kaylee Frye gave the other teenager a nervous glance as she sat down and sniffed greatfully at the fresh food gracing the table. She wouldn't have even considered Serenity taking the scarred boy as a passenger if not for his uncle. There was something about the younger man, Lee, that made her all kinds of mistrustful.

The uncle though... "This is the best tea I have had in ages!" he proclaimed heartily, patting his stomach. "Young miss, where did you find it?"

Kaylee blushed. "It was a gift," she mumbled. "A Companion traveled with us for a while. She left a couple of months ago." The tea had also come with several bolts of precious silk cloth and an altered dress. Inara had said something about the colors not suiting her very well, but Kaylee wouldn't have been at all surprised to find out that Inara had purchased them especially for her.

She didn't fail to notice the look Mal was giving her as he carefully set down his own cup.

"Well, come on, let's dig in! Shepherd's not around to say a prayer," Jayne commented, eying the rice and stir fry hungrily as he fiddled with his chopsticks.

River raised her teacup. "To our new passengers," she toasted, giving Lee an unreadable look. "May our journey be without trouble."

"Amen to that," Zoe said laughingly, leaning sideways to Wash to give him a kiss. "That means you get to work extra hard setting a proper course, dear."

"Aye, aye, First Mate," Wash sang out.

Kaylee giggled and took a bite of bellpepper. Maybe this trip would end up being uneventful...


Okay, thanks for putting up with the sheer crack and bunny plottedness of this fic. :-) I hope it was as fun for you to read as it was for me to write. It's been a while since I have posted anything on and this is the first time I've written anything for Avatar series, so it would be helpful to know what you thought!