Well, this is it guys. I'm sad to say that my little devilish brainchild Gestalt is finally at an end. This is the final chapter. I am happy to say that this is the first really long fic I've finished. I will finish them all, I'm just soooo terribly, mindnumblingly SLOOOOW! And I really apologize for that. You guys have all been so wonderful reviewing and coming back to read, even with my emotional breakdowns and general laziness. I appreciate it so much! This fic is my baby and I'm all sad to finally let it go. The following is special thanks to people. I won't cover everyone, but to the rest of you, thank you so much! I'm so pleased that you stuck with me. I wanna just glomp all of you!

Caer

Warning: You will only get the first part of this fic since it contains LEMON at the end. I will provide a link at the bottom so that you will be able to read the rest, but in order to honor policy it will not be directly printed here.

GESTALT 12 The End!

By Caer

Hallways always seem to stretch forever when one is trying so desperately to get to the door. The sun shone in through that elusive door at the end, glinting off the polished white tile of the hospital floor blinding him and forcing him to hold his hand to his eyes as he took step after heavy step away from a dream. Yet he knew if he turned away, if he headed back into the hospital, the shine would be at his back and he would see clearly. But behind him was nothing but a fantasy.

If he closed his eyes, though the light would be gone, he would lose his way completely and all he would see in the blackness would be the shining memory of Quatre looking at him with cheerless and accusing green eyes. The light might be harsh, but if he turned away, he would simply be pulled back by the force of the voice that was calling to him, even in his mind. Quatre was crying. He could tell from here. They all were. They wouldn't get out of his head. Wufei was there, looking at him with disdain, disappointed, somehow. Like there was something that Trowa should see that he refused to. Heero's was a look of resignation. He had given up on Trowa already.

Trowa angrily wiped a tear away and shook his heads at his betraying thoughts. This was utter madness, that's what this place could do to one. It spread madness like a plague. The sooner he was gone and away from here the better. He sped up his pace toward the door, but that did not stop the voices in his head or the heaviness of his feet, which seemed to slow more and more against the hard and unforgiving tile floor until they stopped. He stared at his shaking fists and cried out in desperation, hitting the wall beside him.

Now that he was turned, face against the wall, as he suspected, the bright light no longer blinded him directly. Instead, it cast a rich golden hue along the wall of the corridor, landing on various objects that began to come into Trowa's blurred focus as he looked up.

They were pictures; these illusive objects and they were, like the rest of this place, a range of skills and intellects. Some were very childish, scrawled in crayon, some were done in oils and inks, very rich and artistic, but all were displayed on the wall with pride and special attention. Trowa backed away. It was just another sign wasn't it? Displaying madness as if there was nothing wrong about it, nothing shameful. And was he leaving it, or going back to it? Wasn't the circus a place for normal people to come and gawk at madmen? Was it the same? Was he trapped no matter what?

Finally, his eyes came to rest on a piece he recognized. It was a picture he had seen his second day here. When he had first seen Maremeia, she had been drawing this picture. It was a drawing of Quatre talking to Hilde across the counter. The little girl had completed it apparently and now it sat in honor with the rest of these windows into the souls of madness.

Except, there was more to this picture than there had been that day. She had completed it. She had added background, and even a corner of a chair in the front of the picture to add depth. Clever really, for such a young girl. But there was more to the picture even than that… something that made Trowa's blood run hot and cold at the same time.

Standing behind Quatre were two boys, both about the same height as Quatre himself, one with long black hair, pulled back into a loose ponytail, obviously by skin color and the shape of the black eyes, Chinese in descent, wearing a white shirt and pants. He stood straight, with his hands behind his back. The other boy was sinewy, wearing jeans and a tank top that showed off his small but muscular arms. He had wild brown hair that hung over dark, serious eyes. His hands hung loose, as if he were 'at ease' but ready for action.

Trowa squinted. Even with the simple lines of a talented child's drawing, the picture seemed to have a life of its own. He reached out with a shaking hand and pulled the picture from the wall, staring at it silently.

Slowly, with trepidation, he turned back and walked slowly away from the blinding light and back into the clear madness.

When he finally reentered Quatre's small room, he could only close the door and stare. Quatre stood, his back to the door, even though he couldn't possible not have heard Trowa's approach. Trowa fell back against the door, his legs no longer able to hold him upright. Quatre turned, and there were tears in the blue eyes that had only just begun to fall. For a moment, Trowa's stomach clenched at the terrible sadness in those eyes, before they became cold and distant.

"You're amazing Trowa." Heero glared at him. "You really don't know what the hell you want do you? Have you come back to torment him some more? Or do you feel you need to justify your decision to leave us behind? Including yourself."

Trowa only stared, unable to answer. Instead, something completely different quietly left his dry lips.

"What are you?"

Heero still glared, but his look turned to pity and he walked toward the taller boy. He reached a slow hand out and pushed the brown shock of hair out of Trowa's eyes. Wufei now looked up at him, his countenance showing neither anger or sadness and he said solemnly.

"We are who we are Trowa and we are who you want us to be. Don't you understand yet?"

Trowa looked at him, then his gaze fell to the picture in his hands and Wufei followed the look. He took the picture and walked under the light to look at it. He smiled, amused.

"Maremeia is getting better all the time." Then he looked back at Trowa, a glint in his eye. "But surely your mind wasn't changed by a simple drawing from a ten year old girl was it? Please Trowa." He set the picture down on the table. "She's a creative girl with quite an imagination. She talks with us all the time… or our 'alters' as you would put it." He said with disdain. "Surely it's not that surprising that she would draw all three of us? After all, she is quite mad herself isn't she? Just the workings of a deranged imagination. Easily explained."

Trowa hit the wall with his fist.

"Must you mock me Wufei?" He shuddered. "Why won't you tell me what the hell you are? Why are you doing this to me?"

"Perhaps you are better off asking, what are you doing to yourself. What is it about the picture Trowa? What are you trying to fight?"

"The picture." Trowa swallowed and looked at the offending paper and even though he couldn't see it from where he was, those images were burned into his mind. "The picture was simple…but"

"But?"

Trowa's hands fell limp at his sides.

"But, the two boys in the picture… look exactly like I had pictured them in my own mind." He stared hauntedly at the creature in front of him, completely lost. Wufei merely nodded. He gazed intently at Trowa.

"You're close Trowa, so very close." He smiled. "Heero, Quatre and I have done everything in our power to show you the way, but you must take the last step on your own. We can't take it for you."

Trowa looked up at the blond boy.

"The last step." He whispered.

"Think about it Trowa." An angry voice. Heero was back as he caged the taller boy against the door with his hands, staring up into his eyes, and even though Trowa could see the blond hair and blue eyes, in his minds eye, he saw brown hair and dark cobalt eyes. Reality no longer played the part it was supposed to. He shook his head and reached for the doorknob, but his arm wouldn't move. "We can't control you." Heero said. "You are still free. You always were, but not from you." He moved forward and captured Trowa's lips roughly, causing the scared boy to cry out in fear… yet he couldn't fight. The sinewy figure pressed against his was holding more than his body captive and as a tongue lapped at his lower lip, his cry silenced. When Heero pulled away, Trowa's chest shuddered in an unsteady gasp. He looked down at the boy and Quatre smiled up at him lovingly.

"You're starting to understand." He reached a hand up to caress Trowa's cheek. "I can see it in your eyes."

Trowa still fought though, a part of him still wanting to run.

"It can't be." He said, shaking his head, his eyes questioning, searching Quatre's for help, for answers, for something. His world was shattering. It was cracking apart like so much ice, weak with the warmth of the light, only needing the right pressure to break it completely. Quatre nodded and kissed his jaw.

"It can if you want it to be Trowa." He whispered. He latched his lips and teeth onto Trowa's earlobe, nibbling before speaking softly into the delicate thing. "It's still your choice, love." Trowa closed his eyes at the sensation of Quatre's hand working its way under his shirt and up his chest, idly playing with one nipple. "You're so close Trowa. One word. One choice and we can be yours, yours forever." Quatre looked at him, his countenance serious and somber, but filled with hope. Trowa could drown in those eyes. He was wrong. Quatre was wrong. It wasn't his choice. He wasn't free at all. He had been trapped the moment he laid eyes on this creature.

He nodded helplessly and raised his hands to hold Quatre's waist, stroking the flesh that seemed alien to him, no matter how real it felt.

"I can't refuse." He said, knowing and yet not knowing. "I've come to far to turn back haven't I?" Quatre only smiled up at him, pity mixed with happiness. "Please, help me?" Trowa pleaded, running a tender hand through Quatre's soft blond hair. The boy nodded, holding that hand.

"Don't be afraid. Trowa." He said softly. "Close your eyes."

Trowa nodded, thankful. Soon, it would be clear again. Quatre would make sure. They all would. He closed his eyes, letting the blanket of darkness be his comfort as he relaxed, falling into Heero's steel hold and gently lowered to the floor.

(Hey! Obviously, I can't post the lemon here, so please visit my homepage for the whole of this chapter. Thank you for reading. )

When the dark finally cleared, Trowa felt lips kissing him and whispering sweet nonsense to calm him, arms holding him, cradling him all around. The blindfold was gone. The pleasurable roar in his ears, brought on by euphoria calmed and quieted and Quatre kissed Trowa's face reverently, stroking his neck with gentle thumbs while Heero held him, cradled in his strong arms. Wufei whispered softly in Trowa's ear.

"Do you understand now?"

"Yes." Trowa said, still trembling. "I understand."

Quatre smiled against his cheek as he continued to kiss tenderly.

"Do you want to stay with us?"

Trowa nodded opening his eyes.

"Yes."

Quatre's smile grew and Trowa felt hands caress him and soft bites along his shoulder.

"I'm glad."

"We all are." Wufei added, taking Trowa's hand.

Then, Heero kissed Trowa's mouth passionately and they moved in to start all over again.

"Quatre. My full name is Quatre Raberba Winner!"

Duo looked at the boy, who was smiling brightly. He was practically glowing with kindness. 'He's cute!' Duo thought as he shook the warm slender hand.

The gentle boy turned to the guard, smiling and shaking his head, critically but amused as he looked at the chocolate-covered hands.

"Treize, I thought we agreed that you would lay off the chocolate if Heero fixed the security system. You'll never get a date with Nurse Une if you don't lose some weight."

"Yeah well, I didn't eat breakfast so I figured it wouldn't matter."

"Not good enough."

The boy's whole deportment suddenly changed. His stance was almost confrontational, yet restrained. He glared at the guard.

"Your body is your temple. You do it an injustice by treating it so."

Duo snickered. Whoever this alter was, he sounded like a total stick in the mud.

Treize nodded and walked off. "Yeah, yeah, I know Wufei. I'll start again next week."

"Yes. You will."

Quatre... or rather Wufei turned back, looking Duo over with a critical but not an unkind eye.

"I apologize for that. I meant no disregard."

"It's no problem." Duo grinned. This was going to be quite an experience.

Duo walked cockily into the room, looking around at the décor, the sparsely clean room, the oriental designs on the curtains, touched by some sentimental objects like a cute gargoyle perched on the desk and a violin in the corner. Duo also noticed on the table, a laptop, which appeared to have schematics of the building they were in. Duo laughed and shook his head. 'This guy is a real number... or several. Nice kid though. Kind of sexy.'

"So, you ready to get started?" He said, shaking himself and sitting down, taking care not to sit on his long braid of chestnut hair. He took out a small tape recorder and set it on the table.

The boy sat down and eyed Duo almost suspiciously. Obviously, this was another alter. Had he counted three now? He wasn't sure.

"What do you want to know?"

Duo grinned and turned the tape recorder on. He noticed that the boy stared down at his lap, rather than look up. Duo felt kind of sorry for the kid. He must have been through a lot.

"You're not big on eye contact huh?"

The boy looked up nervously, and then bowed his head, hiding his eyes completely.

"Sort of, I guess. I just don't like people seeing my eyes."

Duo noted the change and wondered who this was.

"So what's your name kid?"

"My name is Trowa. Trowa Barton."

Duo smiled kindly at Trowa.

"You're pretty shy aren't ya?"

The boy nodded and smiled slightly.

"We all tend to keep to ourselves... although..."

"Although what?"

The blue-green eyes gazed at him hungrily through wild blond hair.

"We do tend to get lonely."

Owari

Agh. Okay, I do realize that ending it with an epiphany sex scene is a bit cheesy. It's what I had planned from the beginning of this fic when I thought it would be a mere three chapters and not that detailed. You know, short like a 'Twilight Zone' story or something. It made more sense to me then. Now, I look at it and I just think cheese with a capital CH. Still, let me know what you think. I'm very curious.

So, what pleased me most about all the reviews is that everyone had differing opinions. Some thought that Quatre was crazy and some though that Wufei, Quatre and Heero were real. That makes me incredibly proud since that is the effect I was going for and I thank you for the feedback that told me I was on the right track.

I honestly hope that I have not answered any questions at all. I intentionally leave it vague and it's up to you what you want Quatre to be. Either he was a weird magical being who was… as Quwinn put it 'a maneater', or He was in fact mad and Trowa was nothing more than a new personality he took on. Or maybe, Quatre is real and we are all figments of his imagination. Perhaps we are all aspects of his deranged mind… fangirls and boys who read and write about him having hot pony sex with his fellow pilots because that's what turns him on, while we are not real, in fact, at all. grin Ain't reality a tricky thing?

Thanks again everyone. Thank you so much for your support.