Humans Decay
What should have happened in 'School Reunion'. Enough said.
Disclaimer: I do not own Doctor Who.
YES! IT'S FIXED!
The Doctor looked both angry and upset as he turned to Rose. She immediately felt guilty for bringing the subject up, even before he started talking.
"I don't age," he said quietly, "I regenerate. But humans decay. You wither, and you die. Imagine watching that happen to someone you -"
He broke off. Rose thought he was just unable to continue, until she thought about what he'd said.
"What, Doctor?"
He ignored her.
"You were going to say something else then, weren't you?"
It seemed very obvious. If he'd been talking about anything else the Doctor would have said 'Well done' in a voice smothered with sarcasm, but this wasn't anything else. He'd almost told Rose something he shouldn't've. Not until later, anyway. Not until they were alone, the mood was right, and she knew him a bit better. He silently wished, not for the first time in his long life, that he didn't have to regenerate.
"What?" Rose repeated, more impatiently.
"Drop it," the Doctor muttered, turning away from her. He started towards the car.
"No!" Rose grabbed his arm, "Doctor - look, you haven't said all you were gonna say. So say it."
"Rose, this isn't the time -"
"What do you mean? How bad can it be?"
Rose's voice was rising; she sounded almost angry. If only she knew.
But she didn't. And the Doctor was getting angry too.
"How bad can it be? Remember I told you how bad the Krillitanes were? Yes? Well, add another suitcase full of bad to that and you'll come close. All right?"
Rose opened her mouth to speak. Then she closed it, shaking her head. She'd never understand the Doctor. Not properly, anyway. And if she ever did, he'd regenerate and she'd have to get to know the new him all over again.
It was a shame. She liked him how he was now.
"What is it, Doctor?" Rose took hold of his hands, "It can't be so bad that you can't tell me. You can tell me anything."
The Doctor sighed. He gave up. If Rose wanted to hear the truth, she'd get the truth. It wasn't his fault if she couldn't handle it.
Looking her straight in the eye, he swallowed.
"Rose - I was going to say imagine watching that happen to someone you love. There."
Rose froze.
"What do you mean?" she whispered stupidly. She knew perfectly well what he meant. She just couldn't think of anything better to say, "I mean - you love - I know, what you - sorry, I -"
Urgently trying to think of something better to say, she tried to clear her head. And a million different questions piled up inside it. Which one to ask? At least, which one to ask first?
"Erm ... why - " she suddenly realised she was still looking into his eyes. She couldn't take it - she looked away from him.
"Why is that such a bad thing?" she said eventually.
The Doctor put her face back where it had been, so he was looking back into her eyes.
"I said it before. Imagine watching people you love die. You fall in love with someone, you're ready to spend the rest of your life with them. Then they die. You grieve, you eventually get over it, and you find someone else. You fall in love again, you're ready to spend the rest of your life with that person ... and it happens all over again. I learnt my lesson long ago, Rose." There was a single tear streak on his face, "You're so lucky. You humans can spend the rest of your lives with the people you love. But I can't spend the rest of mine with you."
Rose wanted to burst into tears for him. Instead, she made herself feel better by squeezing his hands. She was still holding onto them. She didn't want to let go.
"I'm going to live as long as I can," she told him, swallowing, "And I'm going to stay with you for all of my life, even if it is short to you -"
It sounded pathetic. Rose blinked - she found herself crying.
"Doctor, I'm sorry," she choked, shaking her head.
"No! No - Rose," the Doctor pulled her into a hug, "I'm sorry. There's so much I should've told you the day I met you. I'm sorry you had to find out about everything this way. I'm sorry."
Rose hugged him back tightly. The world, to her, might as well be gone - Mickey, Sarah-Jane and K-9 had melted into thin air. It was just her and the Doctor ... nothing else mattered ...
A sudden screech made her jump and let the Doctor go.
Just a one-shot I had an idea for. Sorry I haven't written for ages ... back to school, you know ...